My son is 13 months old and will not hold a bottle of milk/juice himself, help?

I’ve tried all the usual things like putting his hands on the bottle and putting mine over his etc but he just will not do it so I have to feed him it. Also he will not spoon feed himself, he does very well sat in his high chair eating fingers foods himself like sandwiches fruit pasta cucumber etc but he doesn’t know how to feed himself say yogurt or beans with a spoon. I let him hold a spoon as I feed him and I also put the food on his spoon and hand it to him but he really does not understand what he’s supposed to do with it. I have spoken to the health visitor who wasn’t much help she just said ‘aslong as he’s eating a drinking I wouldn’t worry he will do it in his own time’ but I see on social media babies as young as 6-7 months holding bottles themselves and spoon feeding themselves. How can I get my son to do this? Thank you

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My son is 13 months old and will not hold a bottle of milk/juice himself, help?

Occupational therapy.

My 14 month old has only just stated using a spoon as she would rather use her fingers , I’m fine with it .
The bottle issue I never had as she held her bottle from 6 months

1 Like

My little one rather eat with her hands.:rofl: I wouldn’t worry to much kids learn at different times just keep working with him he will get the swing of it.:heart:

Mine won’t either. We’re making slow progress with a sippy cup, but not often.

Have you tried a double handled sippy cup that is the only thing my son would use!! Good luck momma

He’s 13
Months that’s your answer


I have 3 and they never held their own bottles. They had no problem holding a sippy cup. They just enjoined the cuddled with the bottle.

My Daughter is 14 months and she finally started holding her own bottle. I believe she just didn’t want to hold it herself and wanted cuddles too :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:


Slowly help him figure out and grasp how to hold a spoon🥰

He’s only 13 months, he’s not going to know how to use utensils yet. My almost 3yo still uses his fingers sometimes. It takes time and practice to master these skills. I wouldn’t stress over it.


My oldest daughter was lazy would not hold a sippy so I finally got straw sippy cups and yea feeding themselves with utensils isn’t a big deal at this age just give him a jar or bowl or food he will mess but let him it’s how they learn you can’t be afraid of the mess

He knows you’ll do it for him. Let him have some time with it before you intervene and do it for him.


Each child is unique and develops at their own pace, he will get it in his own time :two_hearts:


Sit him there with his spoon and let him get the hang of it himself. you eat in front of him and make it a game .


dont worry my son is 15 months still doesnt spoon feed himself, he just prefers to hold the spoon in one hand and uses his other hand to feed himself,
you could always buy Podee hands free bottle atleast then you dont have to hold it

1 Like

My daughter is 2 and still doesn’t like to used a fork :joy: try straw cups tho. Helped my LO cause she never drank a bottle bc she was EBF and never took one. So she never learned how to hold the cup up and back. We are learning and doing better now tho

My son did not start using a spoon until he was like 3 :joy::joy: I did the same thing and he was literally so uncoordinated it just never worked out. As far as holding the bottle he should be holding it on his own and I’m sorry to say I don’t know what to do if they don’t want to hold their bottle. Try a sippy cup with the handles that he can actually grab onto? I try to have my kids switched to sippy cups around the age of 1 anyway but that’s just me (they have transitional that are like bottles but have the handles). Good luck mama!! Every kid is different, my daughter was fully self sufficient by like the age of 2/3 and my son is 4 and still cannot dress himself properly or wipe his own butt lol all you can do is try and if it doesn’t work out don’t think you are doing anything wrong!

Don’t compare your baby to another baby. Each baby is unique and different. My son is almost 2 and recently started to feed himself with a fork or spoon. He would hold it and use his hand. The bottle issue I never had. I showed him how to hold it at 3 months and constantly worked on it until he was able to fully do it on his own not long after


They will all learn at their own speed . Take from a old lady . They will at their own time


Give him a sippy cup too old for bottles anyway

1 Like

I just put my daughter’s sippy on her tray and she dies it herself when I tell her no it’s your turn. She won’t really spoon feed herself but I give her a spoon when appropriate. I also show her by eating myself.

My 13 month old usually just grabs food with his hands and every once in awhile will use a pre loaded spoon to eat. Don’t stress mama. He’s still so young.


He’s still fairly young. Set by example, let him feed you; make a game out of it so he can learn.

Both my daughters just knew I would hold it for them so I just stopped and boom 5 minutes later after throwing a fit they can hold it with no problem. I think it’s just cause they are used to you doing it. I put it in their mouth and let go and let them figure it out. Took just a few minutes.


Is this a real question?


Ooof my son is 2 and a half and still only eats with hands smh.
But Just hand him the bottle and wait or walk off…

1 Like

I have 7 children & they were all different some of them would do things at an earlier age while the other one’s preferred to be helped, if this is your first child, don’t place pressure on yourself or your child thinking they should be doing the same things as other children.


Ask your pediatrician. If you’re in the US there is a FREE early intervention program. Each state calls it a little something different but they will come and assess your child and tell you they are fine or they will help you by providing free developmental therapies. You can call this program yourself, you do not need a referral.

All babies are not alike give him time to be a baby they grow fast enough

1 Like

Give him the silverware and his food. If he eats with his hands, oh well, he is washable. Eventually he will use the silverware. I would also try a straw cup, he might prefer that. Maybe quit feeding him, he might just be like, moms gonna do it, I don’t have to.


No more bottles needs a supply and just give him the spoon he will figure it out in time with trial and error as well as watching you eat.

It’s a comfort thing, let him be… Enjoy that time where he still needs you, before you know it he will be grown and you will be wanting him to still need you, trust me xx


None of my kids would eat with a spoon until closer to two honestly. They widely preferred their hands, they would only eat off a utensil if i fed them. As far as their cups, my middle baby was like that. It sounds harsh but i put chocolate milk (her favorite) in a cup in front of her and i refused to feed it to her and she got so impatient and angry that she did it herself. :woman_shrugging:t2:


They are all different and do things at different paces.


My youngest started holding her bottle around 5 months and using a spoon for yogurt around 7 months it does take some time I found the best spoons and forks to be these

ITS NORMAL MAMA! He’s still learning how his little hands work etc. my little guy is 15 months, won’t hold his bottle or use a spoon or fork. My middle son did all of that before 7 months. My oldest did it around 10. They all grow at their own pace, don’t compare you baby to others, I promise he’s okay :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:


My 14m old don’t use a spoon

I feel like this is normal mama. All babies do things at different rates ! Though my son holds his bottle he still makes me feed him and he’s 15 months. :heart:

1 Like

Consult with an Occupational therapist. They provide “Early Intervention services” to assist children with many early childhood physical issues. Call your Pediatrician. They should definitely know how to help.

Sounds like a typical 13month old. He has his issues.

The lady’s right. Your baby will learn in time. Just cause others learn early doesn’t mean yours will. Just keep letting him play with the spoons and giving him bottles/supply cups.

Stop comparing him to what you see on social media. You will do more harm to him, listen to the health visitor.

1 Like

Most kids dont learn to hold a spoon til 18 months+…i would get a cup with handles to help him hold it. Also working with fine motor skills like holding and grabbing stuff

I was soooo worried about this because my son was really late to holding his own cups, but literally one day he just did it and did it ever since really try not to stress about it! There was absolutely nothing wrong physically with him he was just late to doing it.

My daughter is 16 months and doesn’t know how to use a spoon shed rather eat everything with her hands I give her a spoon and she tries but doesn’t get it so I just let her eat the way she wants

Just keep giving them the spoon and they will eventually figure it out but most babies eat with their hands… shoot i don’t know many kids that wouldn’t rather eat with their hands… and just keep putting the cup in front of them with their milk/ juice eventually they will do it

Each and every child (and person) are completely different. Which means, we all learn this and that at our own pace. Even as adults, we learn at our own pace.


I would check with early intervention. It is an amazing service and will give you the opportunity to address any issues early on if they are needed. If they are not, it doesn’t cost you a thing to find that out!

1 Like

If he’s hungry enough he will hold it himself.

My daughter was super stubborn about holding her bottle. She COULD she just didn’t want to. Could be totally different that was just my experience. She also took a while to eat well with utensils on her own, definitely wasn’t doing it much at a year. She’s 4 now and will STILL hold the fork with one hand and eat with the free hand🤦🏼‍♀️

1 Like

Try a sippy cup or bottle with handles. My kids didn’t like holding the bottle but were fine holding a handle.


Please speak to your pediatrician and not people on a Facebook page. It could just be late blooming but he might actually need early intervention services.

My daughter walked early. Was out of her crib at 9 months. Thought her older brother would go to kindergarten in diapers. Never walked around furniture… just one day decided rolling wasn’t cutting it. Kids do things in their own time. I have 4 n not one is like the other. Calm down n just offer her the spoon. My granddaughter is 1-1/2. She hasn’t gotten the hang of a spoon either.

1 Like

Give him time and stop comparing him to anyone else! If the Doc isn’t concerned I’d let it go…

He will learn eventually some kids learn faster some kids learn slower at 13 months I really don’t think it’s a big deal he’ll pick it up quick

As long as your child is meeting their milestones in their time you’re good :slight_smile:

Chill and don’t worry. Each has their own time. And idk what six or seven months old is successfully spoon feeding themselves, but put a spoon in the tray and let him do his thing.:wink::purple_heart:

Definitely delayed
Motor skills- look up videos on YouTube,
My son went through the same kinda stuff just a little younger maybe 11
Months or so but yeah ! Talk to his pediatrician about early intervention and his motor skills

My daughter would never drink out of a bottle. Just playing around, I put the straw to her mouth and she would drink from that, at 8 months old. All kids are different. They sometimes have to do it their way. Give it time. Some kids learn early, some later. Some just don’t like certain things… But they tend to catch up very fast later. Comparing two children is like comparing an apple and an orange… They are all different!

1 Like

He might just rather use his hands :woman_shrugging:t2:

My middle child took for ever to do things to learn new skills I kept getting told she was just developmentally stayed. When she was two she was still not walking and unable to feed herself I raised hell and wanted to know why. Her doctor sunt us to a geneticist who knew something was wetting ran a test and confirmed she has William’s Syndrome, which is a genetic disorder where she is missing the elasticin gene in her seventh chromosome and causes issues similar to Down’s. Amy mama that is worried should press their child’s doctor until you get answers.

Agree! Enjoy the times you can hold him and love him!

I breastfed 2 of my kiddos until they transitioned to a sippy cup. My youngest was a preemie and I had to take meds that dried up my milk. She was a very “me do it” type baby and transitioned to a no-spill cup at 11 months. Bottles were so inconvenient and messy, I couldn’t wait to get the ones that did use a bottle off as soon as possible. Some cups have handles and a no spill/drip top. Maybe try your son on that. Good luck

He could have a developmental issue. Has he ever held a bottle on his own? Has he ever fed himself? You need to voice your concerns to his doc.

I’d say at 13 months he should be able to hold his cup/bottle to drink himself. Spoons and forks eh I wouldn’t worry about that yet. That takes a bit of practice to get down.

Always talk to your pediatrician about developmental concerns.

All children go at their own pace. There really is no set age for what a child should be doing. They all do it differently when they are ready. Don’t compare your child to others children, your child is perfect. This would be something I’d worry about if he was like 2, but not 1. If he isn’t ready for some things, give him time and continue helping him. Don’t stress yourself over nothing.

1 Like

Forget other babies. Never compare your child. Some do some don’t feed themselves. All children are different. But me personally I’d put the bottle or cup in front of him and leave it there. If he wants it he has to get it and praise him when he does. Don’t do it for him. Same with the spoon. Put it all in front of him and leave it. Eat with him and let him observe what you do with spoons and forks.


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My son is 13 months old and will not hold a bottle of milk/juice himself, help?

Don’t compare your child to others on social media lol…he will take control on his own, maybe you holding his bottle for him is his connection to you…offer a cup with handles and see how he does, he’s eating finger foods himself, which is a milestone but @ 13 months old your expectations are a little high, sorry


Talk to his Pediatrician! He could need an Occupational Therapy Evaluation.


My boy was almost 16 months before he would get the spoon to his mouth and still had food on it. He was breastfed till he was 2 so never had a bottle but then after that I had to go thru several different style of sippie cups before finding one he liked and would hold . Your baby will get there and the more you stress the more they pick up on that and then they stress causing more accidents in my opinion.


Like the nurse said he’ll do it on his own time. Can’t force them to do things
My daughter won’t hold anything she has to tilt up but will drink from a straw

My sons never held their own bottles. Try straw cups those work and it’s still kinda really for utensils so don’t stress. If he doesn’t have it by 2 then ok maybe

Occupational therapy. I have an autistic daughter who we are still working with on eating utensils


Truly All Kids just need to go at their own pace , truly I don’t think you have anything to worry about some children are just slower to learn No Big Deal Enjoy Him while he,s still little :blush::clap::clap::clap::hugs:

My son was holding the spoon at a year old but he wasn’t sure what to do either. The Dr said he would learn at his own pace and so I just let him continue to hold his spoon while I fed him. He finally started eating from a spoon at 2 1/2 years old. He fully had it down without dropping the food off the spoon fully at the age of 3. So he will learn and catch on at his own pace. Very good he is eating with his hands like finger foods and stuff. In his own time, he will learn it Mama. No need to worry unless you see other things he should be doing that he isn’t at this age but he is still young so don’t stress and push him. He will learn when he is ready. Every baby learns things at different ages and at their own pace. He is jist fine. If you are worried about anything, talk to his doctor and see what they say and or recommend. Good luck to you and your little one.

I watch a boy who was a little over 2 before he got the whole spoon thing. Some kids just take longer

Other than his ability to hold utensils and a cup do you notice anything else that you feel concerned about. Each child develops at their own pace but if you are noticing that there are other things that your child seems to fall behind in have him brought into a health care provider and ask for a pediatrician

Kids move at their own pace. Try a sippy cup.

He can grasp and eat. Try different utensils made for babies. If he doesn’t hold utensils soon have him evaluated.

Try using a cup with a handle on each side. They should drink juice out of cups anyways as to not rot their teeth

He’s probably just being lazy and wants mom to do it for him. If you stop doing it for him he will do it himself. My kids are 9 and 8 and are still lazy. A couple months ago I told my oldest to make a bowl of cereal I told him out the cereal first then the milk because that’s what he wanted and he goes really you’re going to make me do it myself and starve :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::rofl::rofl:. I said you’re fine go make a bowl. Sure enough after a little bit he make himself a bowl. Lol

Please don’t compare with other babies :heart: all are different trust me I have 3 all very different lol my youngest is the princess and is honestly just lazy and know I would hold it. Also some bottles are alittle bit weirder to hold. Yes it could be something underline but it might not be so if you can just enough the extra cuddles… I will say my daughter will hold her sippy cup with no issues so just know it will change and don’t overwhelm yourself :heart:

Try sippy cups and finger foods. He will eventually learn to use a spoon.

Take the bottle and give him a cup or if you want to keep him on the bottle hand it to him ( unless there is a developmental issue) there’s no reason he shouldn’t be holding it. Just my opinion anyway.

dont make it a big deal. keep trying without being frustrated

Quit trying to force your kid to do things because other kids do. There’s the first step.
Next, feed your 1 year old finger foods until he learns how to use utensils. Hell most adults can’t use utensils properly :grin:

1 Like

You never want to put juice in a bottle, it can contribute to rotten teeth


My daughter is 18 months and just started eating well with fork & spoon.

1 Like

13 month old spoon feeding it’s self if very very rare :joy::woman_shrugging:t2: just saying and yeah every child is different and learns/grows in their own way… he’ll do it in his own time

Give him time he will get it done

My daughter used her feet for support. Just do what I did. give him the bottle and let him figure out how to hold it himself.

Why are you asking this group a question like this. You should be asking his doctor and getting professional advice.

1 Like

Hands free bottle… Might work…

Maybe try working on his fine motor skills with play, you could create activities such as feeding a doll with a bottle or spoon. You could also try creating a messy play and using spoons to move items. You could also demonstrate to the child as they typically copy what their parents do :slight_smile:

Stop. Stop comparing your child to every other child. Your child is unique. So he doesn’t do it yet, but he will. What’s the rush anyway?

1 Like

Stop giving on. Put the sippy cup where he can reach it. Trust me when he’s thirsty enough… he will get it

Otherwise have him checked out. If he’s not teaching milestones within three months get him looked at by Dr. That’s why mike stones are there so we know if our kids need help with something.

1 Like