My teenage son has started demanding things from us: Advice?

He has always been very strong-headed and stubborn, but here lately, it’s worse. He seems to feel entitled for some reason. He just got his temps and seemed to think that he Has to drive everywhere we go and will Demand it. He will Demand to have a controller over the radio while in the car. The hubby (yes, his dad) and I both work full-time jobs, and he wants me to get home and let him drive. I sometimes work 12 hr shifts and don’t get home till 8-9 at night. When I tell him no, he guilt trips me by saying that 'it’s what parents r supposed to do.'He will even call me at work up to 16 times a day just to ask to drive. I have a hard time getting him to help out at home with anything. He demands to KI and hangs with friends, and if I say no for any reason, I’m the worst. He doesn’t do this to dad, only to me, and when dad talks to uom about it, nothing works. Please give this momma some strength.

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Sounds like you created an entitled little boy who has learned how to get things his way, especially with you… He can’t guilt trip you if you don’t allow it. He doesn’t contribute around the house because he’s allowed not to… no chores, no driving… and driving isn’t a right, it’s a privilege and he needs to learn that asap. Why do you let him Demand anything? If it were one of my 3, I’d tell him straight out that his attitude means he can wait until he’s an adult, buys his own car and take away his temps. You and his dad need to get on the same page and present a united front. It’s not up to him and he hasn’t earned the privilege.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My teenage son has started demanding things from us: Advice?

Just put your foot down. You are the parent, and he is the child. Plainly tell him NO,and that it will always be NO till his attitude changes.
Also have him earn driving privileges. If he’s old enough to drive,he’s old enough to have chores.
Do not allow him to have that much power over you.
I hate to say it,but if don’t get it under control now. It will only get worse.
Good luck Momma,you can do this.

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Cut up that permit. He doesn’t drive until he’s 18. Disrespect gets no privilege.

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Chiillleee you got good time letting a child worry your nerves! He’s a child, he’ll only do what you allow him to do! If you say no, the answer is no!

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Definitely take away the privilege to drive until he understands that’s he isn’t entitled to anything. Just because he’s a child doesn’t mean that he’s not old enough to understand consequences for his actions. Stay strong mama! He’s going to test his limits. But, if you let him talk to you disrespectfully, it will never stop.

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At this age, they already know what they should and how to behave. Time , patience and prayer now

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Take that permit away, he can pat an bend til hes 18.

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Tell him to get a job to pay for all his demands

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If he wants to drive

  1. He will have homework done
  2. He will have chores done
  3. He will be respectful.
    End of story.
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Don’t let him drive , his attitude needs to change first and he needs to start doing his chores🤷‍♀️ Does he have a job ? Make him work for a small junky car so he can see the responsibilities of a car

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My son’s a couple years away from driving still, but if I were in your shoes I would have the 3 of you sit down and make sure dad backs you up. And let him know that driving is a privilege not a right, and if he can’t act right that privilege will be revoked.

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Maybe make a schedule with him so he knows when he will be ALLOUD to practice if he completes certain tasks and asks nicely

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Im sorry but you are the adult and what you say goes period in my home me and my husband say yes or no even to my oldest who is 19 and doesn’t even live in our home we are responsible to raise respectful and well mannered children and we don’t budge we are not our children’s friends we are the parents and they will never tell us how to live our lives ir parent. I don’t ever feel guilty because I know my children are blessed thank God

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The hell no put your foot down do not allow him to go through life thinking he can guilt trip people because that crap never works and it can cause one to be more manipulate later in life. Chorse, homework, taking responsibility. Than rewards

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Imagine having a kid knowing you can’t provide it the basic necessities for it to succeed in life.

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As long as they live under your roof then they are still young enough for a good @ss whooping. And send him to a boarding school until he learns to respect you.

:flushed: my kids would be on the ground with that behavior :laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing: under my roof? My rules. Until you’re out… STFU. Later you’ll thank me​:tipping_hand_woman: until then… I’m not here to be your friend or for you to like me :clap:t3::heart:

tell him to get a fuggin’ job. so he can act like a brat on his own dime & dollar.

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Driving is a PRIVILEGE…my 4 year old knows better than to pester me like that or demand we do things…sounds like you have a spoiled man-child and you need to discipline
…good grief

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Take all driving privledges away. If he cant have respect, or help in the house- he doesn’t get to drive. If he doesnt like it, shred the permit. he can then wait til hes 18. You’re the parent, put your foot down.

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Drive what? YOUR CAR? No way. You’ve created an entitled child, sounds like out of guilt. Put your foot down. If you don’t now, it’ll only get worse.

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And if he isn’t helping out around the house no driving, bad grades? No driving…calling 16 times a day while you are working??? Absolutely no driving for a week every time he does it…holy crap…

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It’s your decisions whether he gets away with his behavior in your presence

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Should’ve started teaching him young(what you say goes)… it’s only going to get worse, good luck with that!

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Tell him no and be done with it. He won’t die because you say no. Give him a list of chores and if he doesn’t do them no driving. By caving to him being a brat you are setting him up for future failure.
He will survive consequences and discipline and he will absolutely get over it and the world that has to deal with him when he’s grown will thank you for it.

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Tell him to help with chores and be respectful an u will make time to take him driving. (When u can)

If the jobs aren’t done then his not allowed to drive.
Tell him only grown ups are allowed to drive an his attitude needs to change before u sit in a car with him.

If he cant change, don’t give in.
Tell hubby also not to take him driving til he respects u an the rules.

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A license is a privilege not a right. He needs to learn that. Simply take it. You are the parent. If that doesn’t help take his phone if he has one, and any video game systems.

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Sounds like a teenager. Just stand up for yourself they will understand later

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Time to teach him about work and what you get out of working .I don’t believe in giving your kid a car bc you can .let him get a job and save for a vehicle.i had to do it and it makes you appreciate it so much more.

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You’re the parent. If you say no, that’s the answer. If he pushes the issue, warn him that you’re going to take away privileges. If he keeps pushing, start taking things away. Also, maybe you should start making him earn driving time, by having him do chores around the house. It’s time he learns how to earn things, as well as show respect.

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He does what you allow. Make a decision, stand by it and quit letting a spoiled rotten child guilt trip you. Wth :woman_facepalming:t2:

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Driving is a privilege

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Don’t cave. Stand strong.

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If he wants to drive or wants to hang with friends and you say no and he doesn’t like it thats too bad for him. Let him be mad. If he says thats what parents do or says you are a bad mom oh well. Acting like that would mean it will be even longer before he is allowed to do these things again. Put your foot down, don’t let him talk his way out of it. And if he doesn’t do work around the house or gives you a hard time about it well guess what he wont be driving or seeing friends anytime soon. He wants to have these privileges he has to earn them and be respectful.

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Tell him no. Hide the keys and his permit. He’s old enough to respect you. If he’s not going to show it then he’s not old enough to drive or anything. Hell I’d take everything away, electronics going out all of it. It sounds harsh but he’s going to act like he’s tough shit then take everything out of his room leave his bed, dressers clothes and his light. I would even change the WiFi password during all this. He has absolutely no right to treat you like this.

Well pullers temporary away from him until he straightens up

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I would tell him to calm down or he wont get his license till he treats you and hubby with respect. Driving is a privilege not a given. Good luck momma

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Google driving contracts for teens (AAA may have one) & revise it to fit your needs, such as showing respect, doing chores, HW, curfew, etc. It should also include consequences for non-compliance, including loss of driving privileges. You all have to sign it. If he doesn’t comply with your rules as laid out in the contract, then he doesn’t get to drive. Also you may want to change your WiFi password if he isn’t showing respect towards you &/or doing his chores. Hugs!

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Just put your foot down. Do driving unless his chores are done. No driving unless his homework is done. Come up with set rules and stick to them. Could even do a chart X chore done equals # minutes driving. If he does chores without being told a few extra minutes. If he does something good to hello like cooks dinner extra drive time. If he bugs you at work about driving take away time.

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Just say no let him sulk they hate ya if you do they hate ya if ya don’t :rofl::rofl::rofl: Jaun Mcintyre can you imagine if you tried this with us

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From day 1 I raised my son to respect everything I do, right down to earning his own. I was never the perfect parent or mother but I always made sure my son knew what respect was especially when it came to having and earning your own things. No child should ever feel entitled to having their way especially if they can’t prove they can be even trusted with a vehicle. Sorry this kid doesn’t even deserve a bus pass, buy him a bike, tell him peddle his way to where he needs to go, he needs a good reality check that u both parents work hard to provide for the family and one of them is ur mode of transportation and those are not toys.

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In my house I made chore lists and each chore was worth so many minutes of drive time…take out trash was 5 mins…dishes was 15…clean an entire bathroom 20…laundry done And put away…25

He does it because he knows you’ll give him what he wants. Simple solution. Stop letting him walk all over you and start taking shit away from him when he acts out or refuses to help around the house.

Sounds like he could use a trip to the wood shed!!!

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I’m sorry but I just don’t quite understand letting a teen behave this way. You’re the boss. Not them. Don’t let him walk all over you like that. He literally depends on you for everything. He needs to treat you with a hell of alot more respect and you need to pull up your big girl britches and put your foot down! You’re only obligated to provide a roof, food and a decent home environment. Don’t let him guilt trip you and don’t allow yourself to feel guilty about trivial things. He’s alive, he’s fed, he’s clothed and he’s spoiled. Love yourself more than this! I’m not saying you have to be a full blown hardass, but being a pushover has done nothing positive. That child wouldn’t survive without you. Don’t feel guilty for a damn thing.

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Shit… tell him pay for the gas, insurance just like we have to do… hit the road and start walking if ya can’t pay your part!!

Well work out compromise and give him chores and have him earn his time to drive .

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He can get a job and buy his own car🤷🏽‍♀️

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I would take it all then
Take the permit
Take the phone
Take the going out

When he can act responsibly and respectfully
Then he can start earning back privileges

Take it all
Say no and tell him he can start by zipping it and wash the dishes and preparing meals

If he can’t quit acting out after 2 or 3 days you may need to get him counseling before this becomes a problem
No one is going to accommodate that behavior in the world🤷‍♀️

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Stop being a doormat! You are the adult. Set ur boundaries! If he doesn’t show you respect, stop giving in to him. If he calls you a million times at work tell him no once and hang up on his every time he calls back. You have taught him it’s ok to ignore what u say, to repeatedly bother and pester you and to ignore your parental authority. He is a teen aged kid! Ground him, take away his driving privileges or whatever else it takes to bring him back to the reality that he is a kid and YOU ARE THE ADULT IN CHARGE. We teach people how to treat us. And how to respect us.

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Stand your ground if you dont it will only get worse.Been there done that.

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Get him driving lessons I am a driving instructor teaching people how to drive cars. Ask him to do jobs to help pay for his lessons.

You are the parent, it’s your way or no way. He can demand all he wants but if you say No it’s a NO! I also have a teen but a girl and sometimes she be trying to catch an attitude and I stop her right quick and get in her face and ask her “who in the H*** are you talking to because it sure a** h*** it ain’t to me!! My house, my rules and you will lower your tone when speaking to me !” (Also yes I do get in her face so she can make sure she’s looking right at me . No I do not believe in hitting my kids but best believe I make her realize right quick not to test my gangsta :rofl:) Needless to say she had a phone and because of low grades and her attitude it was taken away last school year. She didn’t want to help out at home and also was acting entitled. I told her “it’s my way or no way and you do not have a choice to do chores, I am not asking you if you want to do them ; I am saying you ARE doing them!” Now she wants her phone back and guess what? Now I will give it back when I want to . This was the second time she got it taken away , the first time she had it taken away for about a year and a half. I have no problem with showing her who is boss here. You don’t ever ask them if they want to do something or not, you tell them to do it and point blank. Be stern with him, You’re the authority not the other way around. If he wants respect and wants to be heard then he has to learn to respect you and hear you when you say you can’t and you are tired after a long shift . Good luck momma!

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You are lucky he wants to drive some people are not interested so make the most of it and encourage him.

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Why would you do ANYTHING that a CHILD DEMANDS you to do??? Ever!!!

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Girl if you don’t break a broom on his teenage back :broom: he out his gah damn mind .

Put your foot down! Do not let him walk all over you. And FYI that is not what parents are supposed to do, parents are supposed to provide the childs needs to live not allow the child to drive whenever they want.

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He needs to get a part time job, so at least he won’t have TIME to nag you about anything. Calling you that often at work??? Won’t that cause you a problem with your job? And he doesn’t get to decide what a parents “job” is, until he’s a parent himself! Has he always been this demanding and impulsive?
Have you consistently said NO and made it stick, or has he always been able to badger and manipulate you?
It sounds Like the 3 of you could do with some nice, impartial, family counseling.

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He wouldn’t drive again until he realized his place and started helping out. Rewarding bad behavior just creates more bad behavior. Your husband needs to intervene and put his foot down.

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Set some Boundaries and stick to them

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Spare the rode spoil the child

Try reading your post then ask again…
Answer is in the pudding. He’s spoiled. Acting entitled? Well… Guess he doesn’t like being told NO… lol Who does? But we get over it… As will he :heart:

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Stop giving in be stern he can throw a tantrum in his room

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Driving is a privilege, so he doesn’t have to drive at all. Sounds like he needs a good Ole fashion butt whooping.

Giving you the strength to knock him back in his damn place. Amen. Parenting ain’t easy… Your his parent not his friend, make up certain times you can go out driving together.

Your the parent!!!
Sounds like he needs a good old country ass whoopin!!!

Take the driving privileges away minus what’s necessary for getting his permit/license and only allow him to drive those hours and if you can have him only drive with the school teacher and not yourself. Take away video games, and any free time he has out of the house. You’re the parent and I’d be damned if any one of my kids would demand anything from me!

This just didn’t start sounds like he need a old fashion Ass Whoopin put you foot down next he will be stealing it

No just no. How the hell u gonna let him demand to drive when he ain’t doing his part at home? Is his grades good enough to joy ride? Is his room clean enough to borrow the car? How about insurance?

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Time for some tough love.

If he’s going to be disrespectful, then guess what, he doesn’t get to go for a drive.

You’re the adult here. Show him that.

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Simple tell him no and he needs to cut the attitude. And he needs to earn driving privileges. Cause as long as you allow it . It will continue.

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He shows no respect he doesn’t deserve anything. Don’t give in to him . I raised four children. Don’t show me any respect you don’t get a damn thing from me. That’s how it was in my house. My children and I are very close I have wonderful relationship with them and my grandchildren.

Sounds like he needs to get a job and buy himself a car to drive–and pay for gas, maintenance and insurance. You know, like our parents made us do. Nothing is free in this life, and the sooner he learns that, the better it will be for you and him. He may pitch a wobbley, but he will get over it. Stand fast, Mamma.

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Driving is a privilege, not a right. Put your foot down and put him in his place as a child.

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People will only do what you allow them to do sit down take your roule as patent back maybe family time where you all sit down everyone gets turn to express their needs wants and you don’t all him exactly how you want you house ran I would have weekly meetings punishment to fit offense good luck God bless you :pray::heart:

Being a good driver doesn’t only require practice, but maturity. The actions he is taking would tell me, yes he is excited to drive, but may not yet have the maturity to handle the responsibility of driving.

If I were in your shoes, he would be told when he’s done having his tantrums, and can show consistent, mature behavior for a period of time, we will revisit the subject of him learning to drive. It is a PRIVILEGE, not a RIGHT.

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Take his privileges away and make him earn them back slowly. He disrespects you again as he’s gaining his things back then they get taken away again. You are the parent, he needs to learn his place! Kids these days are lucky, I would be black and blue if I pulled this

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No is a complete statement and if he wants to drive I’m sure there’s a great list of ways he can help if he’d like to be granted that privilege from you.

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Part time job, and put your foot down and say no!

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Yikes… if my daughter demanded things from me like that, she wouldn’t have anything. Gotta earn what you get and be grateful. Maybe teach him a little humility too.

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Does he pay the bills??? I kinda doubt it! If you don’t get that under control it’s gonna be a lot worse! Don’t let him guilt you! You’re the parent! Let him pitch a fit! Video him and post it on Facebook

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Giving in to guilt tripping is quite a dangerous habit to give into🥲
Consider the risks of enabling his behaviour now and what this could impact in the future.
If he doesn’t grow out of it, you don’t only risk dealing with this now but in 5 - 10 years and so might the people around him.

We’re here to be moms, not be their friends.
If someone breaks rules, they lose privileges.

If my babies were naughty they would lose their privileges. No wifi, no tv time, no desserts.
Evenly so, they would also be rewarded at random just for being good kids so they knew we appreciated and noticed them(they were young so idk how this would do for teens already acting this way)
Who pays for his phone ect?
:sparkles: Boundaries :sparkles: if he doesn’t stop calling you I would warn him that you won’t be topping his phone up.

It’s going to be hard and tiring but so so worth it.
Sounds like mum and dad also need to band together and support eachother. It will be good for your son to see even if he isn’t happy about it now :slightly_smiling_face::slightly_smiling_face:

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Get your partner on your side. Kids will always take advantage of you if they see you guys aren’t agreeing and go to the parent who gives in. Not fair of your husband to put you in that position and got trip you. Your son will have his time to drive for the rest of his life!

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Full believer in if you can’t be thankful for what you get you can not have anything at all. Take that card & don’t give it back until he realizes driving is a privilege, not a right.

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My mom always repeated she was a parent, not a friend. I was always so irritated with her, but eventually pulled my head out of my rear end and respected her a lot more. We now have an amazing relationship. Set ground rules and stick to them. He doesn’t like being told no? Oh well, he’ll get over himself eventually when he realizes temper tantrums won’t get him anywhere. Start removing privileges until he deserves them back and just maybe then he will stop acting entitled to everything. Not looking forward to this stage with my 3 littles :grimacing::roll_eyes: Good luck momma! :heartpulse:

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The thing is it’s your home and your rules…When u say NO stick to it…Your his parents not his buddy… if ur he doesn’t help,No Driving ! God help any woman that gets involved with him He’ll expect them to run for him like you do.No Means No

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Take driving privileges away due to behavior. Stop giving in.

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Beyond Scared Straight

Ummm, what? “He guilt trips me”. “He demands…”
Nope!!
He gets NOTHING!! He loses any and all privileges and cell phone and can earn them back, doing chores around the house.
He sounds entitled and that is completely your fault.
The only way things will change is if YOU stop giving in.
You are the problem, not him!!

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His father needs to take control!

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Driving is a privilege, not a right

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Sounds like most teens, bratty ones. I have 1 and I just shut him all the way down and he gets it

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Chore chart=driving time

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Driving is a privilege, if he helps out at home and is respectful he earns the privilege. Each time he calls you at work for an unnecessary reason or is disrespectful, time is deducted from his driving privilege.

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Stand firm with the no. And if he persist still no. Be consistent tell him if he keeps it up it will be a long while till he drives. Let him throw a fit. It won’t hurt him. Take things away. Show him you mean buisness.

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You are the parent, he is the CHILD!
Why are you confused as to what to do? Simply say NO! Make rules and enforce it. Tell him, its either your way or the highway!

You cannot keep giving the freedom to demand to have things his way and still you wonder why he acts this way.

Tough luck is better than spoilt love.

Love him enough to be tough on him!

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Stand your ground momma!! If you let him have his way, he’s gonna walk all over you…allowing him to drive is a privilege, not a necessity…. If he doesn’t straighten his tail up, then revoke his diving privileges until he acts right :woman_shrugging:t4:!!

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You’re the parent. It’s time to take control.

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