Opinions on breastfeeding a baby that you adopt?

I cannot have children, but my husband and I are possibly going to adopt a relative’s baby that is due at the beginning of the year. It is not a sure thing yet. We have a lot to work out and things to do. My question is. Do you think it would be weird for me to try and breastfeed the baby? I read that it is possible for an adoptive mother to breastfeed. I just want some opinions. I don’t mind if you have a negative opinion just, please be kind and respectful. This is an important moment in my life, and I do not want to deal with mean comments or criticism.

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I am a biological mother and former foster youth who was aged out of the system. First, make sure this is a conversation between you and expecting parents to see how they feel, as everyone will have different feelings on it. You can also ask expecting mom to pump for some time and provide that to infant as well. That’s good for both mom and baby, since that milk is designed especially for that baby.
Most adoptees and biological parents respond to this question with a resounding no, because of a few reasons. One of the biggest being that the milk, while not bad for a child will not have the specific benefits that the pregnancy would have. The next biggest is that it feels inappropriate to them.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Opinions on breastfeeding a baby that you adopt?

Why not?! Breastfeeding creates a bond, and I know this from experience. Good luck to you.

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How would you breast feed tho? Did you just recently have a baby?

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If you adopt that child is yours so what is wrong with that? Girl you do you and dont worry what others say.

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Not at all it will help the bond!

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Do it mama! Induce lactation, your doctor can help with that :blush: There is nothing weird about wanting to feed YOUR baby and bond with it :heart:

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I personally don’t think there is anything wrong with it. I would definitely talk to a lactation consultant and your Dr to see what you need to do in order to make it happen if that’s what you want to do.

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I say go for it! I nursed my baby girl :heart:

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I think if you want to try you should go for it. It’s a wonderful thing and that’s your baby not weird at all.

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Nursing a baby can cause you to lactate.
This is a very personal decision to make.
I enjoyed breastfeeding. It was a bond and so healthy for my son. If you do attempt, be patient with yourself and your body. It will not happen over night.
If you do end up adopting, start pumping when you find out. It will encourage your body to start producing.

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Absolutely not! I went through the process to produce breast milk for my grand daughter in the event her mama couldn’t produce enough

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Why not it will be your baby

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It’s a great thing! Absolutely do it! So so good for baby and bonding!

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Go for it but I suggest pumping and getting the milk lactation going soon. I use milky mama and their juice mix gives me a lot of milk

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If you can, go for it! But don’t feel bad if it doesn’t work for you. It doesn’t always work for those who have just birthed!
All the best, and hope it all works out for you xx

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I think it is wonderful that this can happen. :slight_smile: You do what suits you and your family. My boobs didn’t work with my own so please don’t be too hard on yourself. A fed, clean and happy bub is the goal and how you get there is what works for all of you.

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I think that would be a beautiful way to bond, I don’t know how it is done other than getting a breast pump and start pumping a little to kick in the mammary glands, but it is best to seek a professionals advice on how.

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Why not! If you can, do it

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I would definitely try it!

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See no issues here… Just make sure anything u take in wont harm the baby. Lactation cookies can help… As long as baby is fed happy and healthy why not? Plus skin to skin is good for u both.

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Not weird at all. You can induce lactation. Talk to your doctor and/or a lactation consultant.

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If you are able to then absolutely go for it! Nothing weird about it at all!

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Oh yes!!
The closeness and knowing you are supplying a need for that baby and only you can do it. Oh yes.

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If you can Do it! There’s this documentary I seen couple years back a lesbian couple adopted a baby and one of the mom’s decided to breastfeed it’s was so awesome. it’s a beautiful bond that is your child .

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If I were in your position I’d definitely be attempting it myself! But, it takes a lot of dedication and I’d hate for you to induce lactation for the adoption to fall through.

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Not weird at all!! I would totally do it!

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If you can breastfeed go for it and if you don’t produce enough breast milk don’t get discouraged since there are supplements that you can take to help with that…good luck and best wishes :heart:

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Uhhh no!!! Absolutely not!! If that makes you feel more “motherly” please go for it!! Sincerely adopted at birth!

Go for it Momma! This is your baby and you make the decisions. There are lactation consultants and doctors that can help you make this happen. Good luck!

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Why would it be weird? I would like to hear more on why you feel that way, if you want to share.

If you adopt, that is your child. I don’t care for saying adopted and biological child, to distinguish.

The child is yours. Full stop.

Stimulating lactation would be a great way for you to bond with the baby.

And, I don’t want to project, but if you are feeling like you aren’t a “real” mom because you didn’t birth this child, work that out in therapy before the child arrives.

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Blessings in your attempt to adopt. Hope all goes well
The rest is secondary, healthy. You will bond through your love
I gave adopted children, but that was never a choice

That sounds amazing! If you can do it go for it! Good luck mama :heart:

Go for it mama. You and baby will have such a closer bond thru that. But definitely dont get discouraged if it doesnt happen. It’s kind of a coin toss of whether it will work or not. I’d definitely suggest contacting a lactation consultant and getting some info on the best way to do it. Congratulations on your little bundle of joy
:heart:

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I think it would be beautiful

Its a personal choice…it does take some effort on your part, but it can be sucessful. I breastfed 10 of my 11 kids and it was definitely worth it.

I don’t see anything wrong with it. I agree with Renee Ramirez, I’d talk to a dr and make sure you really want to do it. There are exercises and medications that can be taken to help with lactation i think.

I would ask mom to pump instead.

I hv a better relationship with my breast fed baby, also make sure you are healthy and fully committed to doing so. My first born we just couldn’t latch I was embarrassed and had no support, my second he cried I leaked. Also it is frustrating and having a great partner that is supportive is a bug plus. Also I think this is awesome i hope things work out for you all. Happy thoughts for all

Do it! Supplements and pumping every 2 hours, I’d start now tho so you have full supply when baby is born

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Talk to your doctor about it.

It’s not weird…its called induced lactation. There are lactation consultants who can explain the process. I’m not sure where you live but if you go to www.zipmilk.org you can find one near you.

How can you breastfeed without having a baby? Sorry not trying to be mean but genuinely curious to how that works.

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I have a relative that did this! It took like 2 weeks to get a full supply in and she had to temporarily supplement, but I thought it was so cool.

You should try it if that is what you want! It will definitely help both of you bond!

It’s absolutely not weird. You’re going to be a mama! And mamas have the choice to breastfeed their babies :purple_heart::relaxed:

Do whatever your heart wants to do. Breast milknis breastmilk and most babies dont mind whose it is. All they knownis theyre hungry. Lol just consult with your doctor first to make sure everytjing is ok and maybe get some supplements to jump start it. Good luck

How would you breast feed? Not being mean, curious on how you would start if you didnt deliver

Not weird, it’s awesome

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I’d say go for it if you can it’s a beautiful thing

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Talk to your doctor but I don’t see why not :heart:

Speak to your doctor first. If it’s possible to produce milk supply without birthing a baby then try to do it a month in advance so you can have a supply frozen and see if it works. Good luck. Adoption is a beautiful thing :hugs:

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Do it! Pump every 2 hours, eat lots of oatmeal and there is a ton of supplements out there. I basically had to do this after I had my son, because I completely dried pretty quickly.

That would be awesome!

My question is why is it weird to you hun. It’s healthier for a baby to breast feed. If it’s a possibility I would go for it. Having a child doesn’t make you a mother. Stepping up and caring for the child does and the fact you want to shows your gonna be a great mom! I’ll pray the adoption pans out!!

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Call your local hospital Mother Baby Dept and ask to speak to a lactation nurse.
Do not rely on anyone but a certified lactation specialist.

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I think it’s a wonderful idea!!! Great for the baby and great for your bond!!

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Absolutely not weird I think it would be beneficial for you and baby to have that special bond together :heart:

Is that possible to produce milk? If so I don’t find it weird at all that will be your child and it’s beneficial to breast feed and that will help with bonding.

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For those asking, I looked it up because it made no sense to me either. You can take certain supplements and medications to lactate. And some people who have never been pregnant can lactate if they take certain medications, including men.

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Feeding a child in any way, shape, or form is NEVER weird!!
Breast, bottle, milk, formula, gtube feeding, sns. Fed is best!!
And if this is what you want to do that’s awesome, your baby will have great nutrition and it may even help you get closer and form a strong bond.

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This is amazing! All the best on your journey :heart:

Definitely do it, it’s very possible.
Good luck with it all

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I love this so much. I don’t think it’s weird one bit!
A few years ago I may have had a different response, but now that I’m a mother… I think it’s a wonderful thought on your end. Go for it! Reach out to your doctor for the right supplements or anything you’d need. And start prepping a few months in advanced so your milk supply is plenty by that time.

Yes it’s a thing, not weird at all… it’ll take hard work, patience and dedication but the rewards will be indescribable. You’re already an awesome mummy for even considering it :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::heart_eyes::kissing_heart:

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How can you produce if your not the one carrying the child? I’m not trying to be rude, I’m just curious is all.

I’ve wet nursed for friends babies and pumped for premies in the NICU (back in the 1990’s… I think it’s a beautiful gift! Get with your OB/GYN and start medication to get your milk coming in! Good luck and congratulations on your upcoming baby!

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It would be an amazing experience for both you and bub. I’ve heard you can produce milk by pumping every couple of hours. Speak to a healthcare nurse or breastfeeding association for advice. Good luck.

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I would absolutely! Whether you birthed the baby or not, breastmilk is still the best food. Wet- nurses have been around since the dawn of humans. A beautiful thing for you to try and accomplish!

This isn’t weird at all. Ive seen this done before for the best interest of baby. Do what you feel is best. Talk to your doctor for further advice.

I’m so curious how that works…

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Not at all. That’s your baby. I bet it would help strengthen your motherly bond with the baby too. I didn’t know it was possible to start lactating in that way. But if it is I say go for it! :heart:

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I didn’t even know that was an option, I say go for it :two_hearts:

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I’m surprised at how many people didn’t realize that women could feed without actually producing a baby!

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Love this!!! I think it’s an awesome thing to do.

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I heard somewhere that a woman, could lactate if they never had a child. Something about start using a breast pump, and it supposed to start you lactating. I don’t know if it really works, I hope it works or something like it works fot you

If it’s a possibility then id most definitely attempt to breastfeed! It’s such a special bonding between baby and mom.

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Props to you for wanting to try this option out. I’ve had 2 kids of my own but I do not produce breast milk. With my first I tried everything my dr gave me meds, nothing worked. I just dont produce milk. I wish you all the luck on your new baby.

Talk to your doctor - -

In some countries and cultures grandmothers relactate to feed their grand babies. True fact. So you being the wonderful person you are to open your heart and home to this beautiful baby and wanting to feed them is not weird or strange. You are going to be that babies momma no matter what!

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I don’t think its weird at all. You are baby’s mumma. I just dont know if it’s possible but if it is that’s amazing!!

Do it. It’s an incredible bonding experience !!:heart:
It’s totally possible. With your doctor’s help you might need medication to induce lactation.

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Absolutely what a selfless act for that baby! Go for it!

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Girl, you do you!!! If you want to, do it!!!

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Adoption was one of our options when we were going through our 8 year fertility journey and I 100% was going to breastfeed. Because no matter what that was MY baby!
Good luck on your journey! :heart:

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Also, if you can’t breastfeed, when you give the baby a bottle, hold the baby close to you - - don’t just prop a bottle up. Holding the baby close is almost as good as breastfeeding (I wasn’t able to - but holding my children close was a bonding experience).

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Get into a lactation consulting group!! They are very informative! Also talk to a doctor!

I was gonna bring my milk back to nurse my best friends baby but she was able to bring her supply back up so my help was no longer needed but I say do it! I’d bring my milk back just fo have full breasts again and help mommy’s in need if the pills weren’t so expensive… it’d be a win win :woman_shrugging:t2:

I wonder if it’s as nutritious for the baby :thinking: this is so interesting! I say do it! The bonding itself will be life-changing! Keep us posted please!

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I say give it a try! I have a friend who did this for her adopted daughter but she got her daughter when she was already accustomed to bottles, so be weary of that. I also think she had to go on a shot to help her lactate, so maybe talk with your doctor.

I’ve never done it but as a mother who successfully breastfed three biological children as well as donated 1,000+ ounces of breast milk, I say go for it! It is definitely possible with the right help and support.

I tried, yet was not successful. Best wishes

If you can, why not?

It’s wonderful, awesome and possible. Check with your gynecologist/OB Dr for guidance. Bless you and good luck❤

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Look into wet nurses. This isn’t weird. I’m not sure how to get started exactly without being pregnant yourself, but this will be a beautiful bonding experience if everything works out with the situation. :heart: my suggestion would be vitamins and massaging the whole breast.

If you can I totally would! I have 2 bio sons and breastfed them both until after the first month then my supply dissapeared. I wish I could have longer so if you can do it! Goodluck!!

I would say talk to a Dr and see what they say. I’m wondering if not being able to have children is the woman’s “issue” would you be able to even produce milk? :thinking: I know women who have had children that have brought their milk back to breastfeed and it works great. Just curious if that would be an issue. Good luck!

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100% if you can find a way DO IT!

Any women can induce lactation, go for it momma!

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