Get that baby help NOW before it’s to late
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So because she didn’t send the amount of clothes in the things you feel like he should be sent with and she smokes weed and there was a weed pipe in the front seat and her it is 1 years old and is in a car seat you’re considering calling CPS and staying at kids neglected and if you and your kid have asthma honey you should have gave him a f****** breathing treatment the first day be a babysitter and saying your place in mind your business
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CPS definitely isn’t best for the child.
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Sit down with her and have a woman to woman talk. She probably doesn’t have anyone to hold her accountable. If she had family help and direction she wouldn’t need a sitter. Have a tough convo with her but don’t come off as accusing. Let it come from your heart as you have here, you and her can help this baby together. I wouldn’t mention CPS, she may end up not trusting you, and find a new sitter who may not care like you do.
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You unfortunately cannot take him to the dr for her but you can keep trying to talk to her tell her you’re willing to help her in whatever way you’re able to but please try more to help before calling cps if he’s only 1 she’s clearly still a new mom which means she probably really needs help more than a cps case. Also idc what others say sometimes maybe it’s different but a lot of the time cps says they’re there to help but they really aren’t helpful at all in any type of way. She doesn’t sound like a bad mom she sounds like she’s struggling and could use some real help and guidance. But if she keeps refusing to get her son medical help then unfortunately you’re going to need to call as that’s medical neglect and as it’s his breathing he could die if he doesn’t get help.
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Should 100% get CPS involved…if she is smoking pot around her child and affecting his breathing that is child abuse/neglect…clearly she care more about her drugs than she does her child…knowing whats going on and how the baby is suffering if it were me i would feel guilty not doing something about it
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All you people on here telling her to call CPS immediately are ridiculous! You don’t know the story you don’t know what’s going on and the fact that you want to uplift that baby’s life and put him in a situation where he could be in danger… It’s disgusting. I hope nobody calls on any of you…
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If he’s struggling to breath call 911 then she will have no choice but to get him the help he needs
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Omg I seriously can not believe some comments, it’s clear people have not read the post
- DONT smoke around babies…
- That car seat isn’t safe for him
3.she’s doing drugs around the child
4.if he’s smelly then clearly he’s not getting the baths he needs
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Y’all jump to call DCS and have no idea how the system actually is!! 
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She can add you to the list of ppl that can take the child to the doctor and take him in … get him checked out but at this point do NOT call CPS and mess with this child sense of security right yet , try to help and advise this mom as best as you can !! She may just really need the help and advice , remember none of our kids came with an instruction manual and she may be doing it all by herself and be overwhelmed and suffering from postpartum! Help fellow mommy’s and women don’t hurt and cripple her more and have this child put in a system that don’t really care about our children! More are abused and neglected and raped in foster homes than in their home with birth parents 
I Use to provide child care services. While my own children were young.
Even of a friend, I would have a set emergency plan for caretaken, babysitting, nannies.
There are boundaries of privacy here about Marijuana and cigarettes. That’s a personal choice, non of your concerns.
However, if the child is got noticeable neglect, malnourished, brused, sad, soiled diaper. Maybe a conversation with the moom to see what else she could use help with… your a babysitter
So mom has some type of work.
A dirty kid in dirty close can mean a child who enjoys playing out side or Hasn’t been changed.
There’s not enough room to emphasize the amount of energy or lack there of people having struggling to be a single parent. Hold a job. And have a sain life.
As of thr Marijuana is concerned. The herb is medically legal, But Federally illegal. If that’s the worst you have. Maybe take a look at your medication cabinet. Because, chemical products such as pharmaceutical are highly more dangerous. They definitely co.e with more side a effects.
God bless you and thr choices ypu make. Look in the mirror first and ask what if she was you?
How would you handle your babysitter calling rhe authority?
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If you are licensed you must report any neglect. I was licensed for 18 yrs and know exactly what you are dealing with. Hard situation to be in but the child comes first. Call 911 & have the child seen while in your care of you aren’t licensed.
Take him to the er when you have him next and say he was struggling to breathe and they’ll start treatment she’ll have to follow up on
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iknow its always put the babies well-being first above all but what about the mums? What if shes going through something? Everyones fighting their own battles what about instead of calling CPS you talk to the mum ask her if she needs help or what not or if shes alright etc? Idk 
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My apinion is get the info u need for this baby it’s God child, if u don’t this baby will suffer for the rest of his life and u seem u have a big heart u will feel guilty if u don’t the baby can’t speak for himself u be the person and help this child step by step it sounds like he has ashma or a infection upper respiratory do and don’t think twice good luck God bless:pray:
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Yeah absolutely don’t call. Do what you can WITH her. Because of the breathing issue you are unintentionally now looking for signs as to what can cause it and laying blame. It may very well be something else entirely and you sitting with her and offering your assistance could be pivotal to actually helping vs causing a whole lot of chaos and strife.
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Do not jump to CPS. Thats the worst spot for any child to be in. It’s “supposed” to help children and families get help if they need it but thats not how it really goes down and that’s the sad and honest truth. Talk to the mother. Let her know you are experienced in asthma and are noticing signs that might be associated with it. Help her understand
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Cps is for children who are being abused not for judge mental Karen’s like you. You obviously have no kids of your own so no right to ever judge.
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Seriously all you people all you mothers need to take a step back bring yourself in that Mom’s position that babysitter recently met the child that babysitter opinion getting in the way of her job the baby has a cold okay who knows she might have a 12-hour shift for the next four days and she plans on taking him next Thursday that’s the only time she can get in and she knows her baby and her baby is not showing no serious signs of distress people need to just be people and
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I’d try talking to the mom first and voice your concerns, see if you can figure what’s going on in her life and offer whatever help you’re able to. If she’s not willing to make some changes or stops having you watch them in response, you may need to involve someone else for the child’s sake. That poor child, I hope they get the help they need.
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Talk to mom if not helping her child yes call DSS
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As far as smoking goes that’s not ur business and it’s not illegal and it’s the parents decision to smoke around the child and if smoke bothers u maybe babysitting the child isn’t best and before calling the state on her sit down and have a talk the state isn’t always the answer . Maybe she needs help she’s new the area and obviously trying she has a job
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This does not warrant a CPS or DCS call. Talk to the mom first. Try and help out if you can. Clothes and old car seat? It seems like she doesn’t have a lot. Try and find her some help and resources.
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If you can try and help her without judging her that would be the better option, as a single mother I’m sure she is stressed to the max, taking her child from her for something like this is not necessary, especially since there could be many causes as to why is breathing is like that that has nothing to do with the mother.
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Just so you know if you do report her cps will not give you the kid I’m only saying that just in case that’s what your trying to do.
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I hope u took that bby to the hospital … I snapped this so if u didnt ur also hurting that bby n ur also responsible
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DCS is not going to be any better.I know many people even my own family who has delt with them.My 4 neices were molested in their foster home we told them what was going on they did nothing until the school called them.A friend of mine lost her 4 month old because the foster mom smashed his head on something then drove around with him for 8 hours then took him to his doctor instead of the er.Another person lost thier child and others had thier children abused in every way guess what DCS stuck up for all the foster parents in all these cases.They got off with probation and just got off completely because DCS had thier backs in court talking bout how good foster parents they were…Know one is a perfect parent people make mistakes and Depression is a hard and not everyone recognizes when they have it and not everyone has people to help them…DONT call DCS the car seat you can get for free at your local fire department or a place like that.Ask on free sites for clothes and things the baby needs.Become friends with this girl and be a friend not just her babysitter.Figure out what’s really going on and provide her with information and help…Sit down and talk to her about his breathing tell her how you guys have asthma and tell her you see signs that he may have it and you suggest she takes him to the doctor so that IF you need to call an ambulance if he’s having an attack then you will be able to tell them qhats going on.Shes a first time mom and she may not understand the effects of smoking especially if she was raised like that…If the baby gets worse and she hasn’t token him and you honestly feel he can’t breath then call an ambulance but don’t do it just because you know she smokes around him…
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I had to deal with same with niece. Mom…husband’s sister…would drop her off weezing and sick all the time in nasty clothes and smelling. Bathed her and went and got meds from store to help her out. When it got bad,had to take her to ER couple of times. Tried talking to her mom…no dice. Finally…after her pretty much living with us first 5 years of her life and feeding,clothing, and taking care of her with no pay to help with food and stuff bought for her all these years…i finally told her step up as a parent or im dropping the kid off at the DHR office and filing a report. She finally started buying her clothes,taking her to dr,stopped smoking around her,etc. Tough talks and threats are needed sometimes or people wont change.
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Personally, I say yes. It’s one thing to not have the money to buy all new things for your baby, I get that. But if you can afford to smoke weed, your child should have everything they need. Weed is not cheap and it should never come before providing for your children. She clearly cares more about getting high than she does about her baby. I am not anti weed by any means, but it should never come before your responsibilities, especially not your children.
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Dfs is an evil org. It should only be brought into a situation as a last ditch effort to save a child’s life. Even then I don’t trust them. It’s gotta be you who helps mom see how she is hurting her child. Don’t attack her, but explain things and offer help.
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How Bout you mind ur business?? Alot of doctors dont perscribe medicine for respiratory issues other than breathing treatments theres not alot of safe medicines for small kids. Stop being a judgmental ignorant nosey ass and leave ppl tf alone!!!
If you are caring for this child regularly, you already have a copy of moms DL, medical insurance card, pediatrician info, and a signed release form for emergency health care in case something happens, Right? If you don’t you are putting your own ass on the line.
To all of you saying take the kid to the dr or ER… Just WHO do you think would be responsible for that bill??? The ADULT who brought the kid in and signed for the services, that’s who!
100% call CPS. If she doesnt care to begin with, than shes never will. She doesnt deserve a kid if she doesnt give a single fuck about it.
DCF does more harm than good.
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Why don’t you offer her help instead of jumping the gun and getting CPS involved. Reach out to your social services or whatever and ask about help they have to offer instead of being a judgmental asshole. Also contact the fire department or wic and ask about a car seat for the kiddo. Try and help this mother instead of trying to put her down.
I would get info and take baby to the doctor for her. She sounds like she’s struggling. They have car seats for like $30 at Walmart. Maybe pick one up. I know it’s not your job to do so but every mother needs help sometimes. It’s easy to judge but it’s even easier to help someone in need.
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Everyone needs to stop arguing and the lady needs to do what she feels I’d best for the baby. We are not there but she is. So everyone needs to play nice.
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Even mention the health department to her. See if she can get assistance buying a seat and getting baby health care.
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Maybe she is trying it’s hard when you have to do it all , and there’s not enough money and you get depressed and you feel like you have no help and everyone is out to get you. No where to turn then DCwhat ever steps in saying there going to take your child be glad “ you “ can do better for yours she’s not leaving the child home alone maybe someone gave her the car seat because she couldn’t afford one YOU DONT KNOW. Always help someone don’t stress someone maybe she is really trying to quit smoking for some it’s just not that easy. Always help your not living her life.
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I really hope the mother sees this post and brings you up on it and fires your ass
How do you even know she HASNT taken bubs to dr? Your the babysitter not the other parent it’s non of your business
Car seat out of date well at least she has one!
If your gonna be this judgemental and plain out cruel then ffs STOP BABYSITTING! You clearly can’t distinguish between a child who is unwell and a child getting ABUSED!
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Call it in for the sake of the child.
DFS hurts the kid more than parent. I would go the extra mile if you care about the baby and the mom can put you as someone who can take him to the Dr. I was on the system. Came from a poor family. I would of took wheezing and a little weed smell over that shit any day.
See if your state has a standard power of attorney for medical/school decision making form that the mother can fill out and get notary to sign along with copy of medical card so you can take him to doc when he is in your care. Incase of an emergency ot he gets sick or even a routine wellcare visit if she cant make it to take him then you can step in to help. Make sure to get a couple of these forms that way you got one on hand and she does and doc…
It seems to me like you are a mandated reporter.
That means report.
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I don’t know the mom’s situation personally but from what you wrote it sounds like she needs help. What if she has postpartum?? Try helping her and not judging her. You never know what might end up happening to you in the future. To get a child wrapped up in the system because of poor judgment would haunt you for life if that child gets assigned to abusive foster parents.
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I don’t know how far you’re gonna get
So you won’t be able to take child to dr but you can absolutely call an ambulance to take child to er (it doesn’t sound bad enough for an emergency to need an ambulance but that’s about the only way they will treat the child without mom being there to sign first) also most local Police departments or health department/wic offices have car seats they are able to give for free. If she puts you on the list of people who can take the child to the dr then you could take child but if she refuses they won’t let you.
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Sometimes people come into our lives through God’s intervention the blessing is your choice be kind and maybe help her out. she sounds not very mature
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Talk to her! She obviously has trust in you with her child, dont betray that trust, have a mom to mom convo with her, Have you ever known a child who has been through the system? It’s a horrible thing for any kid.
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It’s worse if they take the child away from the home.
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I’m sure you can get stuff for him that is free. Look on sites in your area. Why call CPS on a struggling mother? Especially if she is all he’s has.Just help her out as much as possible. Give him a bath when he comes over. Again look into free stuff for him.
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I’d ask her about the doctor he might need a humidifier or a breathing treatment. Or it could be rsv or demonia.so I’d tell her your concerns but don’t bring up the weed to her cus she might run and it might be best if you watch the baby for her because someone else might not care as much as you
You can ask her for info and take him. She can write you an authorization allowing you to take him. Don’t call child protective services, the mom is paying for babysitting, she cares. Do what you can and help her if you really care for the child. Be there she might not have a support system
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Legally it is your job to report to CPS and to your local law enforcement.
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Call CPS and ask questions later. She has money for cigarettes and weed…no question, call them!
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I’d definitely call the none emergency police 
and explain the situation she also might have postpartum depression it sounds like she needs help I talked to her first and explain your concerns and point out that her baby is suffering and that she needs to take him in or you can
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I know it’s a difficult decision to make but you do what’s best for the child 
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Do not call cps. Help her as a friend. Guide her! Then go from there. Cps is not always the answer.
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Call an ambulance, the hospital will report it.
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Talk to her about signing medical representative over to you…you then take him…you call cps…they will take that baby ,possibly and put him in a worse position. The system is broken and you don’t want that. At least you can help and take care of what needs to be done and is there. She may even eventually sign the baby over to you if she gets overwhelmed. Also remember postpartum depression is real and it can be little or really bad and she could have that too.
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You dont know she could be telling the truth about quitting smoking around her baby. The car will continue to smell like smoke if shes smoked inside of it period. That nasty smell just doesnt go away without a deep clean , even then… she has every right to smoke in it when the baby isnt in the car. Regarding smoking weed, is it still illegal in your state? Cause here in ny its not. You cant assime she’s spending money on weed, it could just be given to her by a friend. I highly suggest that YOU get the babies insurance information and have the mother contact the pediatrician office to sign off on a waiver for you to take him in to be seen, tell her it’s either this, or you can no longer provide your services to her.
I strongly suggest you really take a step back from moving forward and destroying this womans life over assumptions.
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Call CPS. If he needs medical treatment and she’s ignoring this then it’s abuse. CPS will come out and investigate and make her take him to see his pediatrician for a checkup. You may be this only child’s help. He needs you to speak up and help him.
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I personally would continue to help the child. He needs you to be his advocate. As for his mother I’d just have a chat with her. Even if you found a car seat on the marketplace and give it to her. Just say you had it laying around so you don’t seem pushy. I wouldn’t dig to deep into her personal life because everyone has things they’re going through that nobody knows about. Just try to be a friend for her and most of all a safe place for the baby! I have a 1 year old so this breaks my heart.
Plus nobody should smoke around their kids. That’s disgusting!!! You want to ruin your Heath, fine. But keep it away from your innocent kids!! Best of luck to you and that baby!!
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If the wheezing is bad enough you can call an ambulance and they have to see him. I see a lot of suggestions but if she has already dismissed the idea of taking him to the doctor she’s definitely not going to let you take him. Try mentioning to her again. You can even get a sp02 monitor for the finger to check his oxygen level and see what it is. Depending on his age ideally 95 and up is goal. If you call cps without exhausting every other option first thennnnn he probably wont get the help he needs it’ll just piss mom off.
Take this for what it’s worth please help her as a friend I’ve been through that CPS system in the early 90s they destroy people’s lives sometimes. My son went on to be Marine he died in 2004 shy of his 20th birthday and because of the system my son was buried of like a victim that he was not and worse yet I was told not to go to his funeral my personal story take it for what it’s worth. If the child is a grave danger I would call the police and they can see if CPS needs to get involved.
Wow all these “turn her in now” comments. I was raised in the 80s. I played outside with no supervision all summer long. Drank from the hose. Rode in a car most of the time with no seatbelt. Focus on your own kids and let other people handle their kids unless you see a child in IMMEDIATE danger.
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I would first help her as a friend but if his breathing isn’t normal tell her you expect a dr report by Monday about his breathing. If you go too far she may just stop coming to you and if that happens just report anyways- cps usually intervenes first before just pulling a child. Is she lower IQ and just needs guidance?
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If the baby is having trouble breathing call the ambulance. Then the mother will be forces to adress the issue.
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I think u should just talk to the mother n see if u can take him to the doctor, n no u should not call CPS. She is a single mother, struggling, n she is all he has. Tell her ur what ur thinking, n I’m sure u can get free stuff for him. Handy me downs, other place will help. Sometimes u can get free car seats. I think if u feel obligated u should quit babysitting.
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Your first concern meds to be the child.
It isn’t a matter of being a bad mom, but the cnhilds mom has already admitted to be in doubt of her ability to raise a child.
Get help for the Mom and the baby before this story has a tragic ending.
I would have her sign a medical letter and notarize it that when the baby is in your care you are authorized to take him for medical treatment, then if he is wheezing again, take him. Inform the hospital what’s going on and let them make the call, you never know what background this mom has until it’s looked at by CPS, if she is not endangering him or neglecting him, they will not remove him. You may not ever see them again, but at least you made sure the baby is safe.
Your a judgemental non-smoking, babysitter who probably is overcharging a single working mother. You’re not a Dr even if you have asthma. I have asthma and would never presume to pronounce it in someone else. Your ‘concern’ is mainly that she smokes around her kid that you have recently agreed to babysit. Reporting someone smoking around their kid (and you really have no solid proof she does) is just going to take up a child protection case worker time that could be spent legitimately saving a child who is in real danger.
Honestly I hope she fires you.
Update: I have tried to contact her and her “roommate” for a few days now. I have had no response…I told her I since day 1 I would help her out and take him myself if she doesn’t have the time. I told her I found a car seat I could help her out with. I told her that He could even stay with me until he gets better. I have been nice, I have tried being there and do what I feel I should as his “babysitter” I expressed my concerns of me being worried about him. I have told her that we can get him on insurance and to get where she needs to be. I never rush her I even tell her he can stay later if she wants and she always wants him to stay later than usual. So I’ve done what I could with this situation and if she doesn’t take time to take him to the doctor, I will do what I feel is right and that’s the road I will take. If I have an option to adopt him if she ever says she can’t do it anymore I will gladly adopt him. He needs to be cared for, he needs for someone to wake up with him because she has said she will sleep in until 12 so I’m curious what the baby is doing by himself. He comes here in 2 of the same dirty outfits. I have bought clothes for him. I bought a stroller and this is just going to continue. Until I put a stop to it.
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CPS is not gonna help them… CPS is only there to divide and separate families. They only add to that baby’s problems. I’d speak to her directly, tell her your concerns. Don’t be nice about it. Offer to take her and the baby to the pediatrician. See what the doctor says, if doctors find that connection (and they will), let the doctors make that call. You calling CPS after you’ve already sorta expressed concern, she’ll know it was you… and that can be a dangerous game if not done right. Just being honest.
Edit: I’m a smoker, and I smoke weed. I also couldn’t find it in myself to quit even while I was pregnant. Quitting isn’t as easy as people think. It’s embarrassing. But my son developed a wheeze around the time he turned 5… I thought I was responsible… I took him to the doctor a few times before we found out that he’s allergic to dust and pollen. It had nothing to do with the fact I smoked, or smoked while I was pregnant with him. As soon as we started meds and breathing treatments, and got rid of all his stuffed animals and kept him in the house more during pollen season, his wheezing stopped and he’s been healthy as a horse since. Just saying…
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if the baby can’t breathe take him to the ER. meet the mother there …address the issue of the outdated car seat with her and the medical staff. the hospital i used worked at offer free car seat for those in need. if they don’t offer it at the hospital call your local fire department and they will help you obtain a car seat for free. The mom needs a friend, don’t be so quick to judge… be kind and help when needed
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Really? Everyone in her saying call on her and shaming her…first off there is not a single person here who knows this woman and obviously the OP doesn’t know much either. How can anyone give advice like that without knowing the situation? Ask yourself this…how many times hava your kids have gotten messy at an inconvenient time and you were unable to clean them up right away, or had a common cold or a little weeze? If you say none, then you are a liar! Now, on that instance when you couldn’t get your kid exactly what they needed that second, how would you like it if Karen over here stuck her nose in your business and called on you, yourself knowing that your child is fine, but shit happens? Now, say your child has a cold. Do you take them to the doctor everything they sneeze? I know i dont but Karen over here thinks that’s wrong! Does that mean she should still call on you? How about this one…what if you were a struggling parent doing the best you can and love your child as a parent should and then Karen decides that what you are doing isn’t good enough so she calls on you? How will that effect you and your child? I can tell you it would have a big effect on your life all because Karen is nosey and judgy and feels.like she knows best! Give me a break! The only person who should be called in the situation is the mother of the child to let them know that Karen is watching her kid and she needs to rethink it because Karen has nothing better to do than speculate and insult others’ parenting.
Honestly you have no proof she currently smokes around him for all you know the car smells like smoke because she smokes there instead of in the house around him , cps isnt all its cracked up to be in theory its fine in practice is totally different the system is broken, she sounds more neglectful than abusive could even be postpartum , as for the breathing maybe ask if you can take him and she can just give permission I’m not sure how that states laws are , just please try and don’t call cps the situation could be even worse if placed with cps at least this way you can still see and help him
As a babysitter you can refuse to care for the child until you receive a medical note saying he is cleared you can say it puts your kids at health risk and you’d just like to take precautions to keep them safe especially with all the covid stuff going on
If your a licensed dau care you are required to call
See something, say something. Be that child’s advocate.
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With Covid being a huge issue, I’d definitely get that baby to the doctor. When you’re watching him, take him to urgent care…… they will likely call mom to get approval for treatment but, what is she gunna say? No? It’s likely asthma but, left untreated it can be deadly. If she gives you a hard time about it, I’d definitely call child services. If weed is legal where you’re at, that’s a non issue. But that baby not being treated for a health issue is neglect.
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Do everything you are doing but also make sure you use the baby frida on his nose and sit with him in the steam, while he is in your home. He will be so much more comfortable and you may save him some ear infections. I’m not saying it’s not something more serious but it is allergy season and sometimes new mothers don’t know to do that.
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It’s clear that he has asthma.
Talk to the mom and see if she’s willing to let you adopt him since she can’t properly care for her own child.
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