My boys want to do something special for my boyfriend for fathers day. We have been together for almost two years. He is so good with the boys; they have a great bond. He has stepped up and been more of a father (a lot more) than their bio dad (he isn’t in the picture). They adore him. Part of me is like it’s too soon; he may freak out, lol. The other part of me is like, aww, that’s sweet.
I don’t see the issue. He is their father figure by the sounds of it
Not too soon… I’m sure he would love it.
Explain to him that he’s been a great father figure to your kids and you feel like he should be celebrated on this day.
Definitely not too soon ! I promise you it will mean the world to him ! My fiancé has been in my daughters life since she was 1 and he brags about her like she’s his! I got his a Father’s Day gift after a year because he showed he was there for her it’s been 11 years now and that’s his baby girl
Where tf are the nails?!?!
Do they call him dad? If so, then sure! If he’s called by his name then make it into a “So and So’s Day”?
How old are the children? That will give me an idea on how to answer.
Celebrate and make sure bf knows ur children wanted to do somethin special for him!!
Let them plan it all. That way it’s coming from them and not you pushing it on ur bf. Although I’m sure hes totally gonna love it
U can get “like a dad” or “someone special” cards now so u can still celebrate without it being so “daddy” if that makes sense
Woulda thought u’d have done it the first year,but yea if the kids love him then u should all celebrate it. Deff not too soon if he’s been there taking care of them this whole time,he seems to deserve a Thank You day
If ur boyfriend stepped up and been there for ur kids for the last 2 yrs then I dont see why u can’t celebrate and show him how much they love him my kids get there stepdad stuff to show him how much they care and he loves it xx
Let the boys make that choice. If they feel like they want to. Let them. I’m sure you plan on being with this man for a while. It’s been 2 years. Which means the kids will see him as a father figure regardless…
I think its to early for me personally. But everyone dosent seem to think so. So you just need to do what you want
Coming from the boys will be a great gift. Your boyfriend will like it.
What does this have to do with nails???
Ask yr bf if it’s kool with him I’m sure he won’t mind
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Don’t think of it like you’re doing it for him, you children want to do it for him. He will probably be more excepting and appreciative than you think
It is too soon. Wait until he is step-dad before giving honor as a parental role. Not only because you’re not married but because you don’t want every guy you date presented as a “father” substitute for your kids. Just my opinion.
If he’s in their life as a father figure then why not
It’s been two years he’s been in their lives, if he thinks it’s too soon, or even you do, maybe re-evaluate the relationship
I’m sure he will be very pleased and proud
anyone can father… the Best one. Stay’s. by choice. those. are. Dads… my mom was both for us.
Just do it. If that is what the kids want.
only if the kiddos want to do it
Yes, yes, yes the children need special people in their lives to be celebrated! If you don’t want to celebrate then why are you letting them get close. It would be confusing for the kids.
Do it for your kids. But maybe talk to him before hand… so he has time to process anything, and communication is kept open. Then you can guarantee a better outcome. He doesn’t have to know exactly what they will do… but he can express what he would and wouldn’t be comfortable with. You can be the bridge for one time
If he really care about the kids he shouldn’t freak out.
For sure do it. If you allow him to fill that spot and he does so then he deserves it.
If he’s stepped up to the role on his own… it’s definitely not too soon and there isn’t a chance it would freak him out. Guys who freak out are ones that actively avoid getting involved with anything to do with the kids
Do it.it will mean the world to him and the kids
i think you should talk to him about it. it’s only been 2 years, && the boys could be good with him if he’s the only father figure in their life (if that’s the case). just tell him “the boys wanted to do something for you for father’s day, because they appreciate what you do for them, would you be comfortable with that” && go from there. make sure he understands it’s the kids idea && not you pushing him to try && father your kids
By all means, do something. A step parent, surrogate parent, a foster parent… Is still a parent. Those people fill a position that shapes a young mind.
To this day, I have a wonderful stepmom who filled in when my mother passed unexpectedly in 1997. My stepmom watched me graduate high school and guided me into what a step parent should be in case I ever decided to date a man with children.
Bless all of you and I hope it’s a special day for all of you.
You can get cards that say “your just like a dad to me”. If he filling the void why shouldn’t he get recognition
You’re Boyfriend will really love that
It will show your Son appreciates him
I would ask him how he feels about it. I don’t see why he would have an issue since they are all close.
Do it!!! Especially bc the kids want too
Of your kids brought the idea to you then go for it… They want to show him that they appreciate him… Its not something that you are forcing if they want to do it. Just because a male makes a child doesnt mean he is a father…As grandma would tell us girls any male can be a dad it takes a real man to be a father
Advertise at as happy friend day instead of fathers. That’s what I did. That way neither kids or him are confused, and know the difference.
Sunny Dubbs has great advice!
Go for it!
I’m in the same boat with my kids, my oldest son was 2 weeks old when his dad died, my youngest son’s dad relapsed on meth and walked out. So neither of my boys know their father. My fiance stepped up and has done everything and then some! So of course they’re going to be making something for him for fathers day, and he’s adopting them both next year after we get married
I’d ask him about it. You got a whole month just casually bring up the conversation about father’s day and see what his thoughts are on it.
My husband now, bf at the time was somewhat upset/disappointed when me and my daughter didn’t do anything for him but he wasn’t technically a dad because we weren’t married and my daughter called him by name only so he knew that. Now, he is Dad.
it’s been 2 years and he’s stepping up he absolutely deserves recognition!I would let him know about it tell him yo "act surprised "but the children will respect you more as well, congratulations he’s definitely a keeper!
My partner and I have been together since November 2019, we celebrate that. My partner has a son that calls me dad
Do it , you say his good with the kids and if he is that good then yeah I think he will think it’s a beautiful thing
How about you talk to your partner about it and see how he feels… isnt that the smartest option!?
let your kids decide. they know who they look to
I’d ask your boyfriend if he would be ok with him celebrating father’s day and talk about it. Communication is key within a relationship.
My kids do it for their dad (in their lifes) and my boyfriend. (Has been around for about 6yrs dating/engaged 4yrs) I see no issue with it. I mean he’s with you so if it freaks him out then he’s not the one. (My kids also make something for their step mom on mothers day also even tho she’s my ex husbands fiance)
Let your children celebrate the man in their life. Your man will appreciate the acknowledgement of his influence in your kid’s lives.
I’d say do it… let the guy know he is making a difference and the kids are thankful for everything he does. What an honor for ur boyfriend.
You should let your child love and recognize who deserves their dad approval.
Yup you should my stepdaughters started getting my little things for fathers day and we had been together only 2 years at the time going on 8 now and nope i did not freak out i found it nice
What are their ages? My boys are 5 and 9 we get thank you cards for my other half weve been together 5+ years and we do it as a thankful day rather than dad day x
I would let him in on what the boys would like to do for him and hope he goes for it because those boys obviously, Like you say adore him and think of him like a father. They’re obviously great full that he is in their lives. They should be able to celebrate someone they are close to and admire.
Id do it, he’s taken on the role so I think it would be nice. Xx
let the boys be in charge of planning the day !!!i’m sure it will a natural flowing day!!
Ask him privately if he is comfortable taking this step with them? And then move accordingly based off of him
Absolutely you should do it. It takes a real man to step up and take on children from a previous relationship.
So many people come on this site asking strangers for their opinions when strangers don’t live with yu and yur S/O.
Ask y’all man or woman, talk to them about it vs asking the public…
Good grief! Seriously!!! Dad is absent and you’re asking the internet for advice? Do whats best for the boys! If they want to celebrate yay!! If the bf isnt up for the task…well boo on him. Its parenting not rocket science…and not social media poll worthy. If you cant figure this out on your own…maybe you need to do more internal homework. Do you know what your boys need? Are you solid in this relationship? Im shaking my head…
If he stepped up hes there for you AND the kids. Celebrate.
If he’s been more of a father then the actual father then…hell yeah!
When my step daughters came over, unexpectedly, the first year their dad & I were together to celebrate me on Mother’s Day…tears. I just didn’t expect it at all. Since they have a really good mom I never thought they’d ever think of me that way. I was completely surprised & so touched. I felt really loved instead of just liked. I felt appreciated & respected. And to later find out it was their mom that encouraged them when they asked her made it even more special.
It’s been 2 years since this man has stepped up & loved & cared for your kids like a dad. He deserves to be celebrated. Don’t ask him. Just do it.
But do remember. He is just a boyfriend who can leave at any time
If its the kids choice hell yeah do it
Yes absolutely. He’s taking on a fatherly role.
Being a father or a mother is so much more than just blood. To celebrate that person that steps up and fills whatever that role may be. Gets Kudos in my book. Like someone else said go with the card that says “just like a father”… the person that will probably have the most problem with it is there actual father. He should be happy his children are getting love and respect from your boyfriend
I would do something as the kids want. If he truly loves you n the kids he will appreciate it. If not he will take flight so to speak.
Wtf it’s been two years
I think 2 years… he’s proved himself… let them enjoy the moment!
I would talk to him and tell him what they want to do and ask him if he is okay with it
Why is this even a question?
Let the kids make the choice, if it scares him off then you dodged a bullet, but if he responds appropriately considering he has been in their life for 2 years then you know you have made the right choice for who you allow in your kids life.
This doesn’t even need to be asked about , but I would maybe give him a heads up so he isn’t caught off guard by it.
Yeah let them show their appreciation to him, let them let him know they think he’s awesome
They make cards for not real dads make it not fathers day be clever call it not a fathers day or celebrate on Saturday before
But id say if they feel fatherly toward let them gift him om fathers day thats cute lol
Personally I would just ask him if he would be comfortable with y’all celebrating it and have the conversation of exactly what roll he is wanting in your childrens lives.
As a man who was in this position, I would suggest a private conversation with him and go with what he feels.
This actually happened to me with an ex before I had my son, was dating a single mother took really good care of both her kids, they all lived with me had only been a few month, she gave me a card and cooked me an amazing steak dinner and we brought the kids to the park with her dad, the only thing I didn’t like was I wanted the biological fathers to spend time with the kids, they still wanted to be in the picture and they didn’t
Ahh that is really sweet. Two years is a long time, and if he has been awesome, I am sure he will love it
Just ask him. No need to make it so complicated.
Start small but let the boys choose what to do for him. They could have a boys day out.
If the kids want to, let them…
Why is it even a question? If your kids have accepted him and want to do something for him, then it’s a no brainer.
Does he live with you and your boys,if so,yes,he sounds committed if he lives with you all,and shouldn’t really freak out.
Why are you even asking the question. You all been together for 2 years and he is more of a dad to the kids than the bio is. My kids got my husband now but BF at the time stuff for Father’s Day and we were only together for 3 months at that time. The kids asked me and I didn’t say nothing to him about it. Married now and even before hand he always said my kids not step kids. Because he was more of a father to them, then the bio dad. Bio dad isn’t in the picture either.
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I would let them do it. I bought my husband a shirt from my son that says “I’m not the step dad, I’m the Dad who stepped up” he has kids of his own but it still made him tear up because he loves my son like his own and has since day 1. If he treats your kids good, let them do something for him.
Maybe you could all cook him breakfast together , or have a nice family day out picnic fishing etc etc Or if you are that worried talk to your partner about it and go from there
Talk to him about it, and talk to your kids too I think that’s important. You could call it something else perhaps, instead of Father’s Day maybe “special person in our lives day” or “thanks for being there day” or similar?
Ask him ! See how he feels about it and go from there,
I say if the kids want to do it go for it. Let them decide how they want to nurture and foster their relationship with him. It sounds like you have a really great man that you’re kids love, so let them express that love and if they see him as a father figure there’s nothing wrong with it. My son was 2 when he called my then boyfriend(now husband) daddy. He stopped bc someone (not me) corrected him but just a couple of weeks later he started calling “daddy-(his name)” and I just let him. He decided in his mind that’s what he was. His dad was rarely ever in the picture, the only reason he called him dad is bc his big sisters called him dad.
What does your heart say… Be authentic to your heart
Is it ok to celebrate fathers day when the mother keeps the kids away from you because you work and cant get them and the court ordered time? Asking for myself…not a friend.
Communication. Ask him how he feels about it…