Should I drop the child support case against my ex?

My daughter’s father called asking if I could please drop the child support case against him because his stimulus check was taken from the state, his driver’s license is suspended, and soon he’ll have a warrant for his arrest. He called the Child Support office and asked what he could do to get his stimulus check back they told him to have me drop the case against him. She’s ten now, and he has never given me a penny nor helped. His parents are the ones who buy her clothes, school supplies, just anything she needs, and have done so since she was born (I appreciate them so much). I have sole custody of her, and the only time he sees her is when she is with his mom. Last year she wanted to join cheer, but it came out to be over $500, and I couldn’t afford it by myself, so I asked him for help, and his response was, “let me see what my dad can do.” I told him I was asking for HIS help, not his father’s. I would’ve asked his dad myself if that were the case. He’s on drugs and hasn’t worked in years; his parents support him. He’s blaming the CS case for not being able to get a job. Part of me feels bad and wants to, but then I would be enabling him as well, and part of me wants him to grown-up, he’s 30 years old and take responsibility for his daughter. He’s bothering me non stop to drop it, and I know, if I do, I’ll still never get his help. I don’t know what to do at this point. She still very much in her life no matter what I do.

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Don’t drop it. I’m in the same situation. Make them responsible for their children. You and the child both deserve it.

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Do not drop that. That money will not go back to him regardless. My personal opinion is he made his bed he can lay in it

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Absolutely DO NOT DROP IT

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Nope. He shouldn’t be a deadbeat. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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His problems are not your problems

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Or he could just have paid his child support to avoid all of that?

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aw. poor guy. getting less drug money cos he has to spend it on those pesky kids.

make him pay.

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Hell no! Leave it. Why let him benifit what is in it for your daughter ? Absolutely nothing

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Hell no…keep the case going and block him…that’s his kid too and he needs to help.

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Hes only got himself to blame dont drop it he needs to grow up

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No you do not drop it!!! And child support wouldn’t tell you or him to have it dropped. He’s playing it to make you feel bad.
He wants his money to go to him instead of his child!
Screw what happens to him he should of looked out for his kid

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He needs to take responsibility. He should learn to grow up…their are consequences…he made his bed…he can lie in it!!! Called being an adult! Get him for harassment if he kewps bothering you or block his number. Karmas a bitch!

Absolutely not!!! My ex throws the same pity party. To bad to sad.

Nope!! He needs to grow up!!

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No. He needs to take responsibility for the child he helped create. Point blank period

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Hell no. He made his bed, now make him lay in it.

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I highly doubt they told him to tell you to drop the case. And he is just mad because he had his money taken I honestly wouldn’t do it because he helped make her! And even after she turns 18 he will have to pay all the back support until it is paid off. Like you said he is 30 He probably won’t ever grow up

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Cut him loose. It’s not like you’re going to see any money from him anyway :woman_shrugging:t3:

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If you don’t tell him to go to hell and stop carrying HIS guilt.

:neutral_face: no he has all the problems because he doesn’t do his part. Don’t help him he needs to help you

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Nope I wouldn’t drop anything, sounds like he should have been a better dad…Do NOT feel bad for him.

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Have him sign his rights then you’ll drop it🤷‍♀️

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Do not drop!!! He’s a grown man that made the choices he made he needs to be grown and responsible

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If you said he was 49 yrs old in stead of 30 yrs old I’d think we had the same baby daddy :joy::joy::joy: he will never grow up. My kids dad is 49 and still living off his parents. He owes over $100,000 in child support. I will not drop the case because for once in his life he needs to be held accountable for something. I have accepted the fact that I will never see a penny but I am not going to drop the case and let him off the hook.

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Don’t drop it. That’s his daughter too, and he should be helping you.

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NEVER drop it… and never is a long time. Best wishes!

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Hell No!!! DO NOT DROP IT!

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No. He needs to step up. He wouldn’t have all that taken if he’d take care of his business. That’s baby girls money. Not his. He’s being a selfish brat and taking from your child. Do not drop it.

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If he made more of an effort to stay clean and find something to make a few bucks; and spend time with her, then yeah, I would probably consider it. He took part in making that child. If he can find money to get the drugs, he can find money to support his daughter. If he did get that stimulus check, what’s the first thing you think he will spend it on?? Not her.

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Hell no! He did it to himself!! Tell him to fuck off! Why should he get money that is meant for her? If he ever catches up she will have savings.

Why would you drop it? Hes had 10 years to grow up.

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Hell no!! The whole he can’t get a job cause of the cs case is a crock of shit.

No way. That money is to better your child not help him get drugs

I wouldn’t drop it, not a chance.

I wouldn’t I’d just say let me think about it and block the number you didn’t make her by yourself

Absolutely do not drop the case! He needs to be held accountable.

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Nope. An as for the stimulus doesn’t matter if you dropped the case or not he would not get it back. I told my ex the only way I’d drop support was if he signed his rights an stepped for real. Otherwise he has a responsibility

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Do not drop it. He only wants that money for drugs. The child support case is not a reason he can’t get a job… it’s passing the drug test that’s the problem. Block him, and don’t fall for his b.s.

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Why is this even a question?!!! Ugh

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No absolutely don’t drop it. She’s 10? He should’ve grew up 10 years ago

Definitely don’t drop it. Even if you did, he’s not going to get money back. How he can get that stimulus check back is get a damn job and earn the money :woman_shrugging:t3:

Nope nope nope. Dont drop it. He should be responsible. My ex in laws are the same way. They have been there for the kids from day 1 and have never treated me or them unfairly and basically support their dad. I told him the only way i would drop it is if he signs his rights away to them. Which he refused. He lives 5 mins from us and never sees them. They want nothing to do with him but are involved in all his family’s lives.

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I did that once and he still didnt pay

Is this a real question? If he had done the right thing all along then he wouldn’t be in this position.

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The money is for her and you shouldn’t deprive her of it. He has no right to even ask

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No. He made that baby too, he can at least provide financially.

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Dont do it
Hes needs to man up
Is not child support holding him back its himself n whatever type of drugs hes on
If you give In he is winning and he needs to know his place n not be a leach

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Nope. He should be supporting his kid no matter what. Don’t drop it.

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My deal has always been if your around taking care or her, we will drop CS because she wants you more than the money anyways and I’ve done without for so long. But as long as he isnt there and isnt helping, do not drop it

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Nope. Block the number and forget who he is. You’ve done it 10 years do it 10 more mama

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no matter how guilty he makes you feel about it, or how guilty you make yourself feel, dont drop the case! it’s time he grows up and sometimes this kinda situation makes that happen. i felt horrible taking my daughters dad for support but it’s only right and since then, i am glad i went through with it. it makes them have some responsibility instead of always getting the “out” they are expecting.

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DO NOT DROP THE CASE! IDK why you would even feel bad. He obviously doesnt feel bad about you doing 110% for your child. Hes a grown ass man. His choices led to these consequences. Thats apart of being an adult. Dont play into that

Girl you and your daughter deserve that money. Dont drop the case.

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Um no do not drop it. His daughter is not his parents responsibility. If he was paying you and he needed the stimulus money maybe but what has he done for his daughter not his parents but him? He is still in the what about me frame of mind and sorry but you don’t get that luxury when you have a kid. If he wanted a job bad enough he would find one. The CS isn’t the problem it’s him. I’d say more then the likely the reason he can’t find a job is he is hoping for one he gets paid under the table so they won’t garnish his checks. I’m also guessing he looks at it as well you get help from my parents so I shouldn’t have to… nope doesn’t work like that. Again he is responsible for his daughter NOT his parents.

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Definitely wouldn’t drop the case, my mothers judge refuses to drop the child support case with my sisters father! Because the judge said he needs to grow up and learn his responsibilities.

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Nope. He’s on drugs, maybe going to jail will get him sober and give him the chance to turn his life around.
This happened to my brother. Now he’s an amazing father and takes good care of his kiddo. Our family enabled him, his sons mother enabled him, and it took him going to jail to sober up and grow up.

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Don’t drop it. Especially if he’s on drugs. That money should go to her not his addiction

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If he was so worried about the predicament he put himself in he would do something about it!!! It’s not your fault he’s where he’s at!!!

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No he needs to support your child. It’s not just your responsibility.

Hell no! It’s his child and he needs to take responsibility

Nope dont do it. Let him feel the consequences of not taking care of his child

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Don’t drop it. He needs to grow up and take responsibility. If he was current then his stimulus check wouldn’t have been taken. That’s his problem. You have a child to raise, not a grown man to help out.

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If they took the stimulus check wouldn’t that go to you?

Let him suffer you. Didn’t make her alone

Just drop it and drop him. You don’t need him
It’s amazing she has his family and you and she’s happy and thriving so let him go about his life. He’s obviously not going to pay you the money anyway…

Do not drop it! My kids were 14 and 15 when he finally began to pay. They’re 18 and 17 now and he is also paying his arrears. There is hope and if you drop it you’ll never receive a dime. My ex worked and found jobs that would pay him cash he found away to make money and live. He also tried to convince me to settle but I didn’t. I also had full sole and physical but I still allowed him to see the kids when they asked. We divorced when they were 2 and 3 yrs old. I didn’t receive a dime for 12 years.

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Girl, keep that case open. He isnt working because he is on drugs and cant pass a test. Let him get arrested. That’s his issue. Not yours.

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So not drop it . He needs to get his shit together :woman_shrugging:t2:. Yeah that money should go to you . What does he truly do to help his child ?
He should of Man up along time ago.

I personally would not drop it!! My situation is similar to yours my ex never pd from 2003 til now my children are now 26&21 he hasn’t been involved in 17 years as far as buying r doing in any way but the end of last year he had a lawsuit for something that happened to him and I was called by DHR that I was to get half so we received 25,000 dollars out of it not only that but he has filed 2 years ago for disability and I’m also looking to receive half of his back time and a certain percentage of his monthly check. So if I was you I would keep it as it is in the end it may work out in your favor

Don’t drop it, who knows he can find a job later on in life and she can get all that back child support to help with college. …speaking from experience…took years but finally paid

Don’t drop it but let me tell you something if he’s on drugs you’ll end up like I have with my children’s father and get nothing. Just keep it open so he able to have nothing.

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He has a responsibility to his child, do not drop the case. When there is a will, there is a way…he is a grown ass man who needs to find a way to provide for HIS child

Nope. Absolutely not. He can grow the hell up and help with his kid.

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I wouldn’t. Getting or not getting a job has nothing to do with child support.

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Do not drop it!!! This is what I call responsibility for your actions! He’s 30yrs old and he’s trying to be the victim. Don’t let him manipulate you into thinking that he is. Maybe going to jail will help him sober up and get better.

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I would not drop it. My oldest is almost 9, and his sister is almost 7, their bio father is $24,000.00 behind just in 5 years, hasn’t paid me 1 penny. He doesn’t see or have anything to do with the kids.
Went and had 3 other children that he doesn’t take care of or see them either. His license have been suspended, for 4 years, he works under the table, but that doesn’t help. He doesn’t pay child support anything. Let it add up, he will have to pay back time child support even after she turns 18, it will not drop.

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Nah you keep that case open sweetheart

Nope. The only way I wouldn’t ask for child support is if it was joint custody and both fully active in the child’s life. My situation we don’t do child support BUT each of us provides for them while at one another’s home and if they need extra we split the cost down the middle and make it happen. You can’t be a dead beat parent and not pay child support. :woman_facepalming:t2: If the Cs is the issue then I guess he should have been proactive and been responsible a long time ago.

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Girl are you seriously even questioning whether to drop it or not?? F*** him! Do not drop the CS case. He just wants that money so he can feed his addiction :roll_eyes:

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Nope. Take that money and find somewhere for that innocent child to join cheer!!

Too bad :woman_shrugging:t3: should’ve taken care of his child.

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Nope. He did it to himself. He doesn’t want to step up, then the consequences he faces because of it, are his own fault. Do not drop it just because he’s asking you to. Don’t enable his shitty actions.

In the same boat with my daughters dad. But he admits his failure which makes it harder. But you gotta do what’s best for your daughter and that means keeping child support up so if he does end up with money some how she gets what’s hers.

Nope I wouldn’t drop it.! My sons bio has NEVER helped in any way &isn’t involved in my sons life… &now he’ll never have a comfortable life & I don’t give a damn :woman_shrugging:t4:

Girl do not drop it he has to grow up sometime

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Nooooo, do not drop it.

Dont drop it. He’s trying to manipulate you into giving him that money back. If hes a drug user chances are hes trying to get that money to buy more. You need to take care of your daughter. You need the child support money. He needs to man up and get a job and get clean and do what’s right for your child.

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1 the stimulus check goes to you for child support, there is no way he can get it back, 2 he says the child support is the reason he cant find a job? Then how do millions of other people who pay child support have jobs :smirk::smirk: and 3. Dont drop it bcuz he is blowing smoke up ur butt. Block him from contacting you unless its thru email so you can have records of it all.

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I would not do that. My x husband doesn’t have a license and only pays when facing arrest

I’m a dude and I say…FUUUUUUUUCCCCCCK HIMMMMMMM

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No way!!! Why do you feel guilty. Does he feel guilty he has a child he doesn’t pay for or take care of. Why would you feel guilty? That money is for your child and for you to help support her. Think of your child!!! He doesn’t!!!

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Hell no! He should have paid for the last 10 years. The fact that he even thinks that you should do this, shows how pathetic he is.

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So, he wants you to drop it so he can have more money for drugs. Not your problem he hasn’t paid it or had his license suspended. If he took care of his responsibilities that wouldn’t be an issue.

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Do not cave to his demands. He does not deserve your help.

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He should have thought of that beforehand. He needs to step up and take responsibility

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Absolutely not! It’s not your fault he let it get that far behind.

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You deserve the support and so does your daughter . Don’t drop it
If you do he will never get a job and continue being a man child. Keep the support open and he will eventually have to work.

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Don’t drop it. He needs to grow up and be responsible. She deserves that money for her needs

If he can waste money on drugs he is NOT WORTH OF PITY or any financial assistance whatsoever!!