Should my ex have to help with school supplies?

I get 128 for 2 kids. I don’t ask for help bc that would be the response. I’ve paid for everything from day 1. To me it’s not worth the stress of asking. I have maxed out credit cards instead.

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Thats when u tell her fine, since we cant be adults and i cant speak to him about our kids then i guess ill be going to court to ask for more child support. Don’t say anything else and that might just change his mind. 300 for two kids, nope… i have 3 kids but one graduated so i had to shop for two and for outfits, shoes, socks underwear, school supplies, book bag,hair cuts, and one of my kids is playing football it had to be paid for now 95$ plus cleats im already in 800$ so if i was u id go after him

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First of all, no, she shouldn’t have an opinion or texting you back on his behalf… however you do get a fair bit of child support alot more than me lol I get $46 a fortnight haha but that’s neither here or there he should want to help out a little bit even if it’s $50

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He should help & his girlfriend Keep out

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I mean, she’s not wrong and you’re not either. But unless it’s in legal documents then nothing can be done. Be glad you get some sort of payment because many don’t. Definitely check out local resources for assistance until you can get this figured out in some way.

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If he’s a real man he wouldn’t have to be asked.

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I would look at the court order and see if it specifies. Alot of standard custody agreements have language in the order that specifies it. Hold him accountable.

Where I live, child support is 30% of their gross income. So unless they are making more or got a second job, the court system won’t just increase his support. They’ll probably end up asking why your hours got cut. Child support is to help out, not 100% provide for

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Actually yes he does. It’s something separate from day to day. Not sure where you live but if you look up section 7 of alberta family law it will explain it for you.

Just thank God he’s your X and move on ! Send the new baby’s mama a thank you card for taking him!

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That’s what child support is for.

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Legally unless it’s in the court papers no. As a good parent yes. But you don’t know his financial situation, maybe he’s stretched thin too.

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He needs to help, this expense isn’t just your responsibility. The gf needs to let you guys communicate, about your kids needs. Look up your agreement, and if not in place than add it for the future.

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She’s an asshole and her comment to a convo that has nothing to do with her was unnecessary. Unless he’s also buying school clothes then he should want to help you put clothes on your kids for school. You might have to make it work on your own momma bear, try doordashing for extra cash.

My ex pays more than that for 1 kid and STILL offered to help with school supplies. If he’s not willing to help with things like that, either figure it out yourself unfortunately or take him back to court. For just school supplies minus the backpack, it was $85 for my one kid. With picking cheapest everything.

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It’s not her business and I’d get a court order stopping contact.
As for him, morally, he should. Can you make him, no.
Not unless you in raise his cs. Or, the order states he pays his $300 and is responsible for half the back 2 school costs.
Look, it’s not fun but there’s help so you can always look and ask around. Mom groups always have clothes for sale to empty closets. You have 2 kids and limited momey, make it count.

300 for 2, you have every right. My husband pays 900 for his 4 year old, just 1 now his baby mama doesn’t have the right to ask for school supplies

I just spent more than $300 on one kid. I would take him back to court. He’s a bum. You wouldn’t have to ask a real dad to help with these expenses.

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That is $5 a day per child to cloth, feed, provide necessities and shelter for. Take him back to court.

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If its not in your terms he isnt responsible to give you half . It is supposed to be taken from the child support he gives you unfortunately. You would have to change the terms of the agreement to add school supplies. They will take into account now he has another child I assume younger than your kids to support . Definitely try to go back

Unfortunately child support is supposed to cover everything (despite being nowhere near half of the amount needed).
My ex & I have an agreement though. I pay for almost everything. But if our sons require help with their glasses, dentist, school supplies ect. Then he’ll pay half. I usually don’t bother asking but that’s the agreement we made.
If he was to say no though due to the child support he pays, he can :woman_shrugging:

  1. Only talk about the children with the ex- husband only. Baby Mama needs to stay out of it.
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I’d take him back for more child support since your income has changed. That will really piss off new baby momma.

It honestly shouldn’t have anything to do with her.
But I’d go to the courts and see if he could help or pay a little more

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No he is not obligated to do it. Yes it is true that’s my child support is for. If you’re asking about the moral obligation yes he should help

Typically it’s child support and 50% medical, schooling

I’d ring him,and say I asked, coz I need help this one time, but if you can’t help that’s fine but in the future Id rather only deal with
You and not the new gf I’ll go max out a credit card instead.cheers

Girl friend should stay out of it . This is between the parents.

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Hes right unless it states otherwise in your divorce or custody order hes not obligated to give more then hes court ordered to would it be the nice descent thing to do sure but legally he doesn’t have to

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My husband paid 300 a month for one child that we had 50/50 and still took home clothes shopping to help. That’s also his son and want him to look/feel good about going to school. He lives with us full time now. We don’t ask for support but his mom will take him back to school shopping to help.

As a stepmom and bio mom being a stepmom first I would have never talked to my sds bio mom like that. We always bought the school supplies and clothes but if she ever told us my SD needed anything we would help because that is what good co-parents do. I definitely think she offer stepped her boundaries and your ex should have been the one to talk to you about it.

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Morally he should want to at least help out with something. I get less than that for 3 but he helps out in different areas like school shopping as he can. It’s hard to do it alone

Seriously all I want to say after reading this post and these comments is use birth control. Ladies we have birth control for a reason. We decide who to have children with. Choose wisely.

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I would modify for it now since they want to act like they for a child! You where being nice letting it sit at that amount! Girrrl go raise it the way the economy is right now and it’s hard being a single momma!

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Even if they are married this is between you and him, she doesn’t have any say when it comes to your children. Also, he could help, if he says he won’t I’d go back to court for an increase in support to help cover the cost.

Does your court order state that you act parent is responsible for 50% of all school related items?

Buy cat and Jack from target. Return them within a year and get paid back the full price that you paid for them (as long as you have the receipt. But the app tracks everything and same if you enter your phone number). Basically free clothes until they can’t wear cat and Jack anymore. They go to size 16 I think. One time investment and you don’t really have to spend money on clothes for them again unless you want to.

They also have free school supply programs. Check your local churches and food pantry’s. All the towns I’ve lived in had events where the kids received a backpack full of school supplies for free.

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You need to go back to court and figure out what you are legally allowed, doesn’t sound right, $300 a month for two kids.

Depends on what your court order says. Does it specify he help with those additional costs?
Does he provide and/or spend additional money when he has his parenting time.
Pick and choose your battles wisely.

I mean, you could always take him back to court :grin::grin:

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I have been there and trust me, that other baby mama will be calling all the shots from this point on. Good luck.

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Child support is for basic needs. School supplies, extracurricular activities, things above that should be split.

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Child support does not cover school supplies. It is the law in Wisconsin that he pays for 1/2. You each buy your own clothes. But the supply list he has to pay 1/2. Save your receipts!!!

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This is between you and him. Until they are married she has no say in where his finances go. Take him back to court.

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No that’s the new woman talking. He should be a father and gets the kids their supplies. Child support or not. … but she is squeezing his balls

When my daughter was with her father and I have 2 toddlers on top if her, I paid 369.99 in child support and helped with school clothes and supplies, sometimes I even sent her home withgroceries or snacks she specifically liked and asked to take… I guess some people are just selfish or can’t say I cant afford to help more, but maybe they should adjust their finances so they could help more… I had to and did because we should always want more for our kids and they shouldn’t have to see struggles from either side but we should show them we help each other because the live we have for the child and want both sides of her life to prosper

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Can you ask if you can get more hours at work ? Child support id supposed to cover those things that your lesser income can’t. Unless you go to court and request a reevaluation then not much you can do unfortunately

All depends on your court documents legally the support you get could technically go for that I know 300 dollars is not alot of money for two kids a month food rent utilities gas supplies clothes etc …and he should have messaged you not her I would be livid also not going to lie… but there really isn’t anything you can MAKE him do…but where I live they have all kinds a back to school things going on at churches schools etc that are giving away free school supplies maybe you can look into something like that in your town …and wanted to say I’m sorry they are being that way best wishes to you momma :heart::heart::pray:

I get where you are coming from, He should offer to help without being asked but mine is also that way, when I mentioned it last year it was thats what you get child support for. I always just do what has to be done and they’ll remember that

Placing a absent parent on Child Support has advantages & disadvantages… advantage #1 child support obligation ( if a parent is absent from the home this parent under childsupport obligation Must pay the amount the cs agency, court or judge finds fit weekly, biweekly or monthly…
Child Support disadvantage#1
As long as the absent parent is paying his or her amount of child support obligation, they DO NOT have to give any additional money towards the child’s upbringing or needs unless the judge of the court specifies in addition to childsupport what else the absent parentust help with… Sad to say but this is how the child support system works!!! So should he help with school clothes, shoes, school supplies, as a father he should feel obligated to but he doesn’t have to because he pays his obligation for the kids ( sad that some absent parents see their kids as obligations but they do ) good luck, hopefully he has a change of heart & realizes howuch he should help out other then just his obligation!!!

He should care about his kids

Man, mine paid his child support AND bought school uniforms. Cant relate.

It can be written into the custody agreement that he pays a percentage for the school stuff and also if your child takes classes. Martial arts or dance etcetera

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He technically doesn’t have to give more but it would be nice if he could. I’d say just buy what you can for now and not get into unnecessary drama with his girlfriend. I also would ask him to keep her out of our affairs moving forward !

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She shouldn’t have an opinion but he is spineless so screw them both. Don’t waste your breath with those 2. Just do the mom thing and make a way out of none.

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The new chick shouldnt have any opinion in this case. You text him, not her.

My daughters father pays more than that in child support for just her, plus medical…
and STILL her stepmom&dad, do a portion of her school shopping every year. Godforbid she needed something here at home & I couldn’t get it for her for some reason, I know very well I could reach out to her dad or step mom & theyd make sure she got it.

GOOD PARENTS, good co-parenting parents, work together.

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She needs to mind her own fucking business!

Court just encourages deadbeats to be deadbeats… yes, he should have to help with extra costs, but court won’t make him.

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That’s what child support is for but it does not sound like he’s paying enough child support maybe you should reevaluate that situation.

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This is a legal vs moral dilemma. Legally he only has to follow what the parenting plan says. Morally if he has morals he would step up. You can’t force someone to do the moral right thing

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She needs to mind her own buisness

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My ex and I alternated who bought school supplies. And he paid child support.

Been there done that. They think their measley child support covers their whole life. They should absolutely help. If it’s benefitting the child why deny them? I’ll never understand that. At least split the supplies geez.

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Buy school supplies now and a few outfits and then buy more outfits and stuff through out as you get paid. That’s what I do. They don’t need everything at once. Just the main stuff. Nothing over the top.

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50 50 doesn’t matter how child support one gets. There will always be the need for extra money for kids and school activities.

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I believe he should have to help. He is the father regardless if you too don’t talk and he pays child support. I would think of he was any kind of father he would help

If you can work, why do you need child support at all? Cover your own expenses when the child is with either of you. Split everything else.

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When he rolls on her and leaves her high and dry, she’ll change her tune. He should have planned better and made the effort to give more for school stuff.

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You cannot ask for more than what the court ordered him to pay

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Her should be at least paying for half of it

Add up what the necessities total each month, write down daily if it helps. Then add up the one offs and additionals, medical; include gas, portions of expenditures, events etc.
And yes, tell her to but out, this is his responsibility.

first of all your ex’s new gf or whatever she is shouldn’t be overstepping the boundary . You asked HIM, HE IS YOUR KIDS FATHER NOT HER. second are you and him normally on good terms or not really? either way he should morally help out with supplies at least. he can take them shopping for supplies. if not look into community back to school supplies events where they usually give out backpacks with supplies for each grade

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Ummm she shouldn’t be texting you at all about your children with him and yea he should help out with clothes and shoes 300 a month isn’t always enough he shouldn’t be having children if he isn’t ready for unexpected situations to come up I would ask for more child support and ask for his new bm to mind her business and worry about her child she has with him

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My husband has a daughter from another women and I always ask him to check in with her if she wants us to buy the supplies/clothes or just send her extra money on top of the child support he sends her … and she always decides to pick the extra money… so he sends more…

He should help u regardless… that’s an extra expense… and she must not have any children to know. :tipping_hand_woman:t4:

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Na I’d be pissed too, it’s between y’all not her, she sounds like a real winner :woozy_face:

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My ex husband pays CS and split all school supplies with me evenly! Every spring and fall he splits clothes for her with me. I think that’s ridiculous and sad! $300 a month barely goes to anything… food , gas to get places , kids toiletries … ugh I’m so sorry!

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Let me see if I can repost some of this helpful knowledge

Depends what your current court order says

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Take him back to court and get it in writing he needs to help every year with school clothes/school supplies/sports and what not. That will give her something to cry about.

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You need to take him back to court.
Child support is based on both parties incomes.
Probably state depending.
$300 a month is $150 a child.
Shew.
That is nothing today

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That’s all I can get unless u take him back to court to have his support re-evaluated.
One of my Exes split everything but we had “joint custody”. The other ex didn’t. Just child support and a Dr bill here and there

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He should help! But he doesn’t have to bc it is what cs is for! And she shouldn’t have say so about anything!

Yes he should help!!!

He should absolutely be helping!!!

I think it has to be stated in the custody agreement if he pays child support. Which is stupid kids have needs that pop up all the time.

Don’t ask for money! It won’t be enough! Let him take them to buy their school supplies!

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My daughter lives with my ex and I offered to help. Even though she doesn’t live with me she is still my responsibility. I was happy to help.

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First off she shouldn’t be involved whatsoever.
Secondly, only if the court order states it can you ask for more outside of the child support. Usually they will specify “extra curricular” or “medical”, but if you feel he should help more during some times than others then have your attorney submit for that change. It’s totally reasonable for things like school when supplies alone will use up your entire child support payment.

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She needs to stay in her place, my kids dad would never let his new thing message me anything about our kids, and he should help, that’s an extra expense and 300 is nothing for a month of tending to kids, she’ll see when he leaves her and she’s the one begging him.

Child support is for basic living expenses. School supplies are a once (maybe twice or more depending on how fast the kid(s) are growing that year and what their school is like) a year expense that will require a temporary increase in spending. It is not fair to expect you to pay for all of that out of your own pocket when the father is still involved in their lives, and you are in the right to ask him to help out. A good person/father will help out, understanding that this is just a for-the-time-being increase in expenses. But if he’s letting his baby-momma answer your texts, he sounds like an immature asshole so I wouldn’t expect him to actually do it.
Also, baby-momma needs to mind her own business. These aren’t her children that she is supporting and in most places in the eyes of the law, unless they are married, his money is NOT her money as well. She doesn’t get a say.

She should not be communicating for him. Otherwise unfortunately he has no other legal obligations.

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I’m on disability getting no child support and don’t get much help from my child’s father……

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Sounds like she will be the one to ruin the relationship with his kids is what it sounds like. If she cared about him she’d care about his kids too. She’s selfish and only wants him taking care of her and their new kid. This has nothing to even do with her. He probably didn’t even see the text she probably checked his phone before and responded. I would respond with, “these are their sizes and this is what they really need. They could really use them.” Alot of times it’s about the money, as if single moms are out there being irresponsible with the child support.

My ex-husband is probably the biggest POS out there and I rarely ask him for additional help with our 5 kids when I’m struggling, but when I do he will at least make an attempt.

The problem is the new partner shouldn’t be anywhere in the conversation. Yes he should still help with the school supplies.

I also agree with what someone else commented. Let him take your child school supply shopping.

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We would be going back to court. He should be responsible for half of all their school stuff & dr bills.

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Technically you were okay until your income was jeopardize. So asking him for more because you don’t work much is just like okay that’s not his fault. I mean he does Technically help already and let’s be honestly people over buy when school season starts. I would just prioritize their uniform if any, and then buy supplies as they go. If you want more xhold support you need to go thru court.

I mean she’s not wrong. That is why you get child support.

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A judge will say thats why he pays child support. That’s the point of child support. But if it’s not enough take him back to court. Keep all receipts for school supplies as well as any school fees. Have papers redone to add these things.

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the wife needs to stay out of it

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Ask him to take the child shopping for some new things. Maybe that would go over better than asking for money.
As far as his new partner answering messages and texting on his behalf LOL
At least he’s HER problem now and not yours. Any parent worth anything would want to ensure their kids had what they needed.

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