Should my son be forced to call his bio dad "dad"?

He doesn’t call him dad because he has failed as a dad. Maybe if he worked on being a dad to him, his son would call him such. No kid should be forced into anything. I’d tell him if you didn’t leave it up to another man to be a dad to your son when you bailed he’d be calling you dad. But since another man stepped up he gets that honor.

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I wouldn’t stop him calling your husband dad. Because your son only knows him as dad. Bio dad needs to earn that title. He wants to be dad he needs to make that effort. Document everything, no talking on the phone just through text messages when he is around record the conversations and make it known he can stay or come without other kids if he wants the attention from your son. Honestly, is there a reason he can’t take him for a day outside of the house or park? Let him go to another town with him? If there is a reason why then make sure you have that reason Documented too. Honestly I would take him to court. Since he wants to act like a child. But honestly, if he takes you, you have Documents and proof of everything. Make sure you even have Document that he wasn’t around for so long and only 3 years ago started wanting to and only a handful of times make sure you can prove that it’s all on him for it.

I’d say take me to court then. It’s not your job to hold his hand and make plans for his visits. He can figure it out himself from now on

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should my son be forced to call his bio dad "dad"? - Mamas Uncut

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should my son be forced to call his bio dad "dad"? - Mamas Uncut

It should be up to your son, if your son wants to call him dad, he should be allowed, not forced. Make it clear to him that its his sons choice and he needs to respect whatever his choice is. Also make it clear to your son that its totally his choice. No pressure.

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Personally think ur son should know who his dad is and your husband as step dad, your son will soon see who is the person there for him. I wouldn’t stress over that. I have a similar thing with my daughter,her dad has rarely bothered in 11yrs but she knows that’s her bio dad. However she also knows my partner has been there since she was 5 and sees him as her dad, I think make it clear what the situ is for ur son, he will realise very quickly who is there for him and who isn’t.
As far as his dad not having any 1-1time i wouldn’t stress that because he has that 1-1time with the guy who raised him. If he wants to take u to court let him it will only reflect badly on him

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I’m going through this with my niece. She isn’r quite a year old but calls my husband and I mama and dada (though we call ourselves aunt and uncle) because she has been with us since birth. She sees my brother (her bio dad) regularly but, even when encouraged to do so, will not call him dada. At this point we’re just leaving it up to the kiddo. Not sure what else to do. We would never force her to call anyone by any title in this situation, also cannot fault her for saying what she does.

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Your son is almost at the stage where in the court he does have a say in these things… To best of my knowledge its 12 but I could be totally wrong. From what I have read I wouldn’t be one bit afraid of court and you have your son and husband supporting your family unit. Do the best you can and keep things calm because you stressed out only affects your little man. My sons dad was similar and we haven’t seen him in 10 yrs now… My oldest is 20. When he was around 10 or 11 I did ask my son did he want me to arrange visits and very clearly and confidently his answer was no he was happy with my now husband being his father figure. I second some comments on documenting every thing.

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That child knows himself who is Dad to him. Any Man can be a Father but it takes a special Man to be a Father and in this case it is your husband his stepdad. No way can his Father force him to call him Dad because he isn’t Dad to him. Well done for your husband to treat your Son as his own son.

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If your kid wants to call your husband dad by all means he should. Kids are people too and can form their opinions on the relationships they have with others. Those opinion can change and should change over time as he grows, if his stepfather has earned the title of “dad” in the kids eyes why should your child not use that term. Biodad has an opportunity to earn that title too, he has to put in the effort. Supplying genetic material doesn’t make someone a dad, it’s the relationship that does

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I grew up calling my step-dad dad, he is the only real dad I’ve ever known and he even fully adopted me when my bio dad gave up his rights. My bio dad has never been a secret and he was allowed to reach out he just typically didn’t. We talk a bit more now that I’m an adult but I call him by his first name. He has been understanding though. Your son needs the stability of who he knows is dad to him. His father helped make him, but he isn’t around and seems like he isn’t really involved… I’d keep notes of everything, visits, conversations, meeting arrangements… if he decides to take it to court you can show proof that he isn’t stable in your sons life. I wish you all the best sweetheart. Good luck.

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My daughter is 9 and she had a big role in her father’s life… every second weekend. But there was always issues… and she ended up making her own decision of him. She ended up having to get put on a mental health plan 2 years ago because of the anxiety and crap he was causing her. All while I still tried to get her to see her dad. He didn’t believe any of it. Had a go at me onfront of her… had a go at her… In the end it wasn’t worth it. I couldn’t see her go through what she was going through anymore. She made her own decision on her father. By his own actions. So soon enough your child will make their own opinion of someone… family or not… and we as their parents need to respect that decision and let them express their feelings and how they feel. Otherwise it will end up so much worse and our kids won’t want to speak up. :heart:

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Try not to stress out. Easier said than not, I know.

If your child wants to call him Dad that’s fine, if he is uncomfortable with it, then he doesn’t need to be calling him Dad.

As for the bio Dad, he needs to step up more. Come for one on one, come more often. Be more consistent.

If the child then calls him Dad then that’s the child’s choice.

A child should not be forced to call someone mum or dad regardless on their relationship with the child.

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Has he said that because of how you portray his dad, or does he really want to call his step dad Dad? Children hear and perceive what we say and do and how we feel. If he really wants to call step dad Dad then he should not be forced.

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My children know their father…he was my husband for 25 years but not their bio…who they rarely see - his choice. They called step by first name to his face and Dad behind his back. He was the only Papa grands knew. They really loved him

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Let your son write a letter to ‘bio’ dad. Let him share how he feels. Hopefully ‘bio’ dad will put on his big boy pants and wake up to what he’s done. If not, document everything you can remember. If he takes you to court, let your son write a letter to be shared in court regarding his true feelings. Let him explain how ‘stepdad’ has treated him as his own and he loves him.

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Any one can father a baby, it takes a real man to be a Dad, and by this post, the husband is the boys Dad, not his father.

A Dad is someone who makes your life easier, helps you when your down, loves you unconditionally and tries to make your life easier.
Your son knows in his heart who his true Dad. DNA is irrelevant x

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That’s his father. He’s very young and doesn’t know what you and his dad has going on or understands anything. If he was older might be different but being so young and if his daddy is present now why wouldn’t he call him dad?

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I doubt he will actually take you to court–idle threats to manipulate you. Even if he did there is no way to force your son to call him “dad”. Your son seems old enough to make up his own mind on this matter. His bio father has not earned the moniker “dad” while your husband has put in the time, energy, and love. Perhaps a conversation with you and your husband and son to get on the same page and then meet (all of your) with the bio and inform him how things will be. He can take it or leave it. Good Luck.

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He’s at a good age where he can decide what he wants to call people. If he wants to call the step dad dad then so be it. Just because you helped make a child doesn’t mean you earn the title.

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“Dad” is a title that has been earned. He may be his father, but his “Dad” is the one that’s been there for him. If your son had referred to your husband as “Dad” so be it. Your ex needs to understand that it’s not all about him.

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He’s 10 years old. I’d tell the man plainly “it’s not up to me, that’s _____’s choice” if he doesn’t want to call him Dad, and continue to call his stepfather Dad that’s the end of it. It’s not his choice, it’s his child’s.

My son is 10 as well and is constantly swapping between Dad and my husbands name. I’ve always been adamant that he gets to choose what title he gives his stepfather.

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I don’t understand why a father can’t or won’t make some kind of amicable reason to see their own children. It breaks my heart and as a nana. I feel a responsibility to my grandchild to let them know they are loved, even though they feel utterly unloved by their dad . It’s just heartbreaking :broken_heart::cry:

Yes, he should call his bio “DAD”. That his is father. I think if he wants to call his step-dad dad, that’s up to your son & his step dad. You shouldn’t force him what to say. I have agrown son that he only seen a hand full of times growing up (which 1 99% of the time incuraged his dad to see him) . He called him dad & I encouraged him to do so. You really only have one bio Mom & one bio Dad, DON’T take that away from them. They will thank you in the end…

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The person who supports financially, spiritually, lovingly and is there everyday, is dad or mom. Just because you helped make a child, doesnt automatically make you a mom or dad. Those are names that have meaning. So in my humble opinion, the child knows who dad is to him. (Coming from experience)

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My blood father lived in the same city as we did. My mom married again and our new dad fed and clothed us and bought us a house. We called him Dad and I called my bio dad Jimmy. He never paid child support and called our dad and asked him to adopt us, so he would never have to pay. Needless to say, Jimmy meant very little to us

It’s your son’s decision only! And if he feels like it, I see no problem in him calling both men dad. Anyways the bio dad shouldn’t force him to do so! Wish you all the best :+1:

Tbh I think at the age of 10, most children can decide what they feel comfortable with and he obviously has reasons for his choice xx

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That would and should be left up to him. I go through the same thing.

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Sounds like the bio is very jealous of the step dad getting his title. I mean anyone can be a father but you earn the title dad. You can’t force him, you shouldn’t force him if he feels bio has earned the title dad he will get it. Right now he needs to pull finger, parent up and take the consequences of not being around like a parent should. Actions have consequences, this is his

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Takes more then Sperm to make someone a Dad. If he doesn’t feel comfortable calling him Dad then he shouldn’t have to.

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Why wouldn’t you want your son to have the best relationship possible with his dad? It’s just going to mess your son up. People make mistakes and grow up.

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Being a child that grew up without a father until I reached out to him at 15… He absolutely does not have to call him dad. I called my father by his name because he wasn’t my “dad”. If your son wants to call his step father dad let him but by no means force him to call a man he hardly knows dad. Sounds like your ex needs to knocked down a couple notches.

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Let your child decide who he wants to call dad. Sounds like this man has no appreciation for the privilege of being in the child’s life.

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Touchy subject… But either way he’s the dad. However your child feels comfortable with. Do you have a custody/visitation agreement? Did you ask the court to move away? I have joint custody and i would have to let the court know why I’m moving my child away from the dad. And how the visitation would take place. He could use this against you, if you didn’t . And If you live far it’s understandable he shows up with his gf and kids.

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That’s his father. If he wants to be called “dad” then maybe he should act more like it.

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The title mom and dad are titles earned not given it should be up to the kid if the person earns the title he shouldn’t be told who he should feel deserves the title more. Thats just my personal opinion

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You know I think you need a clear schedule for visits for your sons sake. Don’t be drawn into a small arguments about who is Dad or expect a 10 year old to understand or even be involved in this. Get a lawyer in all seriousness, set boundaries that are legal, and stop worrying. Your child is vulnerable protect him. Don’t buy into bullshit

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It’s his choice, if your son is happy calling his step dad ‘Dad’ then it is what it is… if his actual dad made more of an effort and contributed more to his life and spending time independently with him then maybe things would be different. Children are very bright even from a young age and have a right to form their own bonds with people. X

My son calls his stepdad, dad and when he turned 18 he changed his last name to his stepdads. Your ex doesn’t deserve to be called dad if he’s in and out of his sons life. Tell him to take you to court, the judge will laugh him out of court, no child showed have this stress on his shoulders.

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Nope. “Dad” is an earned title. Your son should give that title/name to whoever he feels right calling that. Could be both, could be one or the other, could be neither. It should be your son’s choice and no one else’s. :blush:

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It is absolutely never okay to force a kid to call someone dad or mom. It’s not okay to force a kid to hug, kiss, or say things. If anything it puts them in a uncomfortable position.

No way the title of dad is earned.

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I think that’s up to your son. If he doesn’t want to call his bio father dad then he doesn’t have to. If he looks at your husband as dad then he can call him dad.

Don’t stress about it! You do what’s best for your son and if he wants to call his step dad “dad” then by all means go for it! I’m currently going through court with my ex husband, he was hardly around when we were married and after I gave birth to my child to form any sort of relationship with her. She is now 8 and has no interest and has never asked about him or shown any interest in him. She just sees him as a strange man. Now that I’m going through court he applied to start seeing her and wanting time. Court advised he has all these courses to do and can only have supervised visits if it was to go ahead. It’s been nearly two years and he still hasn’t enrolled into the courses and have made no progress using corona as the excuse. The court can see he is just making excuses and is not committed into having a strong stable relationship with his daughter.

Sounds like a right narcissist. Toxic to his son and to you. He can’t possibly accept that his son thinks he’s anything less than perfect so he chooses to blame you for influencing his decision. It is easy to think you know what your child feels and wants by assuming they have the same thoughts as us so make sure you sit down and really talk to your son to know what he truly feels and what he feels comfortable with if you haven’t already so his choices are the ones you actively encourage. :heart:

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Yes you should try harder for your kid to have visitation with his father. NO it is not just on him when YOU moved away. And your kid should decide who or who not to call dad.

Mom and Dad are titles for roles an adult plays in a kids life. It is earned, not given. It should be your son’s decision on what to call him.

He’s not dad if he’s not doing his job as dad …seeing your son non actively 5 times a years is not a dad a dad is the one that puts the time and effort your son has every right to feel the way does :100:

My mom never made me call my bio dad “dad” and I never did. He was always on drugs and never really wanted anything to do with me. My step dad raised me since I was 3 years old and I always called him dad. I’m 28 my real dad still has nothing to do with me. My mom and step dad are divorced now and my step dad is still my dad and he’s the grandfather to my kids. My kids know of my real dad but do not call him grandpa or anything.

I think it should be up to your son what makes him comfortable he should not me forced to call a man his dad if he doesnt feel that way bout him and does your husband

Sounds. Like your sons father is a narcissist and no his child shouldn’t feel like he needs to call him dad ,and if he hasn’t been there for him he shouldn’t be able to see him. If my sons dad acted that way I can get him on abandonment,and also make sure to have proof that I have been the sole provider for my child.The child’s father has no say on anything,and if court ordered of he wants time with him and the court grants him that then he’s going to have to see him for that time and if he doesn’t, document that,and if he continues doing that then you can take him to court where you can show that your son benefits from being with you and your husband. Just sounds like your ex is trying to control things even you and that is toxic.

I grew up in a similar situation to your son. My stepfather (Michael) raised me and has been my dad. I call him Dad. When my biological dad (Dan) would randomly decide to show up, I’d still call him Dad because he is still my dad. When referring to my dad growing up it was confusing because I called them both by the same name, so I started referring to my biological father (Dan) as my “other dad”. Even tho my biological dad never played the role of a father, I still felt it was disrespectful to address him as anything besides Dad. I’m now in a completely different situation with my own child. I’ve been her mother everyday since the day she was born. Her father recently got remarried (to a girl he’s only known for a few months) and they make her call this new girl (a total stranger to both me and my daughter) Mom, and refer to me as “birth mom” when shes there. I hate it, and feel it is completely wrong, as any mother who has spent their child’s whole life being their mother, would. So it depends completely on the situation. Do what you feel is right. Unfortunately, in my situation, her father and this girl are absolutely wrong for what they’ve been doing. But in my mother’s situation, when I was growing up it was not, because it was completely different circumstances.

No it’s the child’s choice in my opinion my 9 year old calls his step dad, dad and he hasn’t seen his birth father in 7 years when asking any questions he refers to him as birth father.
My fiance is the only dad he’s really had my ex was never an active constant part of his life and we left it 100% up to my son!

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Well I have a grand daughter my son and a step father from little on she has daddy my sons name and daddy steps name no halves or anything in our family.

Being a father doesn’t earn you the title…especially when you’ve barely been involved their entire life. He will call him dad when and if he feels the title fits, I say. :woman_shrugging:

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My mum was the primary parent all my life and I call my bio father old man when I’m talking to him or if I’m referencing him I call him by his first name or I say “my biological father”

My bio father was ever hardly in my life as I chose for him to not to be as he’s a very sick in the head man. I chose to call him sperm donor. But your son is at the age where he can call bio father “dad” or not. If he doesnt want to make an effort to do visits or anything well he’s missing out on watching his beautiful boy grow into a man.

Just because he’s the biological father that doesn’t mean shit when he’s never made a decent effort to be on his son’s life. He’s quite happily blaming you for everything when in reality he’s slack. He only wants to see his son when it suits him then throws a hissy fit when his schedule doesn’t match up with yours. He can’t make stuff all effort and then demand your son calls him dad. Self entitled wanker. If he gave a crap he’d try harder. Worse he never comes to visit solo always has to bring his other family so even though he does the odd visit it’s not getting in any quality time with his son. No judge in their right mind will rule in favour of a spoilt rotten man who thinks the world revolves around him. Your son is more than within his rights to call his step father dad. Kids know who shows up for them and who doesn’t.

I have always said and will remain to say. You may be the father but you have to earn the right to be called dad.

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The bio-dad had not been consistent with visiting privileges for 3 out of 10 years of that child’s life…that child is not comfortable calling the biological father “dad” whereas the stepfather been there for 7 years consistently & does a better job of raising that child & the stepfather earned the privilege that the biological father did not.
The child is old enough to tell the difference whereas the biological 1 doesn’t…the mother isn’t wrong. The biological father is wrong.

So where was the biological father been for the first 7 years of that child’s life…hiding in a party club most likely. That biological father sounds like a loser.

If your son wants to call your husband dad, let him, and if sperm donor wants to see his son, put demands also and say not his gf or her kids either and not at your house! And if he threatens to take you to court , tell him do it, that you have proof of him not being a dad, and most of all record him with your son.

Child should be allowed to call his stepfather “dad” if he wants to and if he doesnt want to call his biological dad he shouldnt be forced too

its up to your son who he calls Dad , if the sperm donor isnt paying child support then he can go F himself, suspend all visitation until it is court ordered with a schedule

Ask legal advice but I think your son of 10 is old enough to make his own decisions if he don’t want see his dad anymore or wants time alone to get to know him does he enjoy he has lots half siblings and the demand of dad that’s ur sons choice you need explain ur ex that you will not go to demands this is your son life your and his don’t count so decision is ur child like and lump it or stop access and go to court fight what ur child wants

Talk to your lawyer about your ex write and record things if your ex can’t handle that you have a new guy and your son wants to call him dad to bad / he is your ex for a reason/ now if you have full custody of your son your ex has no rights no control over you /you can stop visits if he wants to keep bring a whiney ass i.m a stepfather and a step grandpa so I know it’s hard if you have to you should have your new guy go with on visits as protection and support

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Let him take you to court then. He’ll get steady visitation and will have to be around more consistently. You will be under no obligation to provide a place for him to see his son he’ll have to pick him up and keep him a night at his home. Also no judge in his right mind would force the kid to call him dad if he doesn’t feel the need to do so. Nor force him to stop calling his stepdad what he is in the kids heart.

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You’re not in the wrong for your son not calling his bio dad “dad”. That’s totally up to your son with what he wants to do. There’s also nothing wrong with him calling them both dad. I would talk to social services or get a lawyer as mentioned above. If money is an issue try getting some family or friends to help you out also if that’s an option. I grew up not seeing my dad either, as my grandparents raised me. I always called my mom, “mom” but I’ve always called my dad by his name. I also don’t call my stepdad or my papaw dad either even tho they both raised me. I think it’s just a personal preference. He’s 10 and he knows what’s going on and eventually he’ll make his own decisions about his bio dad. In the mean time just be there for your son, talk to him about things, and let him know that your on his side no matter what.

Let the child decide who he calls Dad. He knows the whole story ! Just continue being a great mom. ! He has got this !

Why do you care how your ex feels about things? Your kid’s feelings are your only responsibility and he should not be forced into anything in that situation.

Hell no. The same thing with my 3 grandsons. Motherfucker don’t do shit for them or visit them. I’m glad so he can stay the hell away from them. Me and my husband does everything for them

i would see if ur husband is willing to adopt ur son n im pretty sure the boy will sign over his rights and cut him out of his life

Anybody,can father a child Someone special is their Dad.

I would never have made the trip for him and he would either do it or go away don’t go out of your way :wink:

TBH, you said his bio dad has only seen him minimally in the last 3 years since YOU moved hours away. YOU have car troubles so it’s completely on the bio father to now make that commute for hours each time. YOU don’t like him bringing his other family. YOU know your son knows the difference between his bio father and step father but YOU don’t think he should have to call his bio father dad. Sounds like YOU have the issue here. Bio father is making an effort to be part of his sons life by travelling hours to see him. Perhaps he doesn’t stay long as he’s had to travel hours to get there and then has to travel hours to get back home? How would you feel if his bio father was insisting he call his GF Mum? Yes, your son is 10 and should have a say but it sounds like your opinion of his bio father may be influencing his feelings. Put the shoe on the other foot and think about how you’d feel. Why can’t he refer to both men as dad? Why can’t you work on finding a way to get your son to his fathers area so they can spend more time together? It’s a two way street.

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It’s up to the child and what he’s would like I have step son that calls me mum and his mother by her name

It’s your sons choice if he wants to call someone dad. Let the bio go through courts and show all your evidence that he hasn’t been making the 100% effort and tell t he courts he has to spend one on one time with him and not have the gf and other kids with him every time and he has to do pick ups and drop offs he has to make the effort if he wants things to happen. I’d also say his only bluffing with taking you to court so just have everything ready printed out highlighted so if he does you are 10 steps ahead.

All I have read is you want or he wants.
What does your son want???
As for the transport you moved away your car broke down you should still be meeting half way.

I understand dad doesn’t stick to arrangements,so maybe parenting orders would be great for your son.

Let him take you to court, then tell the judge how it really is. Your son calls each man what he’s comfortable with. The guy won’t take it to court. He’s to cheap

Bio dad isn’t putting in his best effort & wants to force the kid who is practically a stranger to him to call him dad??

I had kinda the opposite as a kid, my mom wanted me to call some other man I barely knew dad & I refused. No matter how mad it made her or hurt the guys feelings the guy wasn’t my dad just some guy sharing a bed with my mother, and I didn’t want to be there in the middle of that mess.

Kids are not stupid, and have a right to their own feelings.

He also doesn’t need to bring his girlfriend to every visit, unless they are going someplace after. Sounds like the kid gets bored, and starts ignoring Bio-dad because he’s paying attention to the girlfriend & other kids not the son he’s supposed to be visiting…

I wouldn’t make a big thing of it, stop worrying, and just get on with it, don’t put yourself out, if his dad wants to see him then he will have to do the work to see him, the traveling and so on,
Your son is obviously old enough to understand so it won’t last forever he will be grown up before you know it, if he takes you to court go and explain what it’s like, don’t talk about his dad in front of him, children soon find out exactly what anyone in their life is like,
I’ve been in a situation similar to this and if he changed the time and dates I just let him, if he bought his other family I just let them get on with it,
As long as your son is ok and not forced into doing anything he doesn’t want to do all will be ok,
Best wishes and please stop worrying.

Your son is old enough to see who’s been there and who’ hasn’t. He should be allowed to decide for himself who he calls “dad” and who he doesn’t, or if he wants to call both of them “dad”.

It’s completely up to your son and what he’s comfortable with.

I’d leave it up to your son who he wants to call dad. Keep a record of all phone calls and text messages in case court isn’t an idle threat.

You are not in the wrong here. The decision should be up to your son whether he decides to call him ‘dad’. If he already calls his stepfather ‘dad’ then he may not want to. I think you need to have a serious conversation with your son about whether he actually wants to continue to see his biological dad. I bet biological dad wouldn’t stick around long if it went to court etc

From personal experience it is your sons choice, my stepdad has been in my life since I was around 8 but I know & saw my bio dad & i chose to call my stepdad by his name, I’m 31 now & I class him as that but always refer to him by name… my daughter also refers to my partner of 5yrs by his name but classes him as stepdad even though her bio dad hasn’t saw her since she was 2… now 14… it’s all his choice & he needs to know this without any pressure, he will call him whatever he chooses while getting to know him & let him be to make that decision in time.

He can have 1,2,3 dads and more than one moms if he wants! What’s the big deal? He knows who raised him.

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it should be your son’s decision.If he doesn’t want to call bio dad dad then he shouldn’t have to.

Put on your big girl pants and focus on what is best for your child. Get your ego and petty nonsense go. Get a lawyer and make sure your custody and parenting issues are written out specifically, including his financial obligations. Bio dad can want plenty of things, but very hard to compel a kid to call him dad. Fight the important battles only, take the high road and quit whining. This is about what is best for your child, so stop all the emphasis on how much it stresses YOU out — your kid needs to see you model how to confront and solve tricky problems. Be the grown up. Choose the high road. Get legal aid and any available support, therapy, counseling for your kid. Tough love, but you can handle it.

Kids are smart and r able to determine who is making an effort with them and who is not. I’m going through it myself. My soon to be ex husband has the green light to see his son whenever he wants, but always backs out. He will see our son for maybe three or four hours on the weekends. He will come one day, usually not both days. There is always an excuse.

Meanwhile, my girlfriend makes an effort and she has an amazing relationship with my son. I have not pushed my son in any direction. He just notices who puts the effort in, who is consistently with with, who spends time with him, and who he has fun with. He knowns which adults he can rely on and he gravitates towards those people. Unfortunately his father isn’t one of those people. That is his father’s own doing. These “fathers” have no one to blame but themselves.

being a dad ain’t about being blood related so no, if he doesn’t even act like one.

I would let him decide who he wants to call dad. Just because his biological father wants him to call him dad doesn’t mean he has too. There is more to be a father than being a sperm donor.

I don’t even need to read this. No he should not be forced to call anyone dad. He should use whatever he is comfortable with.

Any man can be a father but it takes a special man to be a Dad!

Good grief! So much drama over such a small issue. I called both my father and stepfather, Daddy, and I’m now 65 years old. He is his biological father. Stop pushing your agenda on your son, and appreciate that he now has two males to guide him thru life. Sigh!

I say keep record of everything! Everything! Every time he calls, text, screws up plans, shows up for future reference. Make sure every journal has a date. I promise it will help you down the road if needed. I think with your child being 10 if he is calling his step-dad Dad and he is the one that has raised him most of his life then he should have the right to feel how he does and call him Dad. I don’t agree with pushing him to call his bio, Dad.

I have a daughter that is 30 years old. She is not my biological daughter but she has been with me since she was 8. She has always called me by my first name and knew that at some point she would connect with her biological father. Six or seven years ago that connection happened and her and her father started a relationship. He got sick only after a few years and died. She was heartbroken. I love her with all my heart and consoled her best I could. Over these years, last 10 or so, she has written me some notes telling me how much I have meant to her even though I have not always been the best “dad” with the best decisions. She is an adult Woman and I know that I have a special place in her heart and she knows that I love and care about her. And that can never be taken away from me!

Once again I can’t comment when I haven’t heard the other side . I think he can call them both dad.

Your are 100% correct in your thinking. Your husband has earned the title DAD and that jackass bio guy has NOT. Unfortunate he’s even involved in your son’s life; he sounds like a JERK and your son knows the man who ACTS like a dad, should be called dad. Good luck.