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QUESTION:
"I work on the road, and leave my one year old son with my mother at home. I come home every few months for a month or so. I feel like I’m doing a bad job as a dad, am I?"
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"My dad was a single dad and worked away a lot. As long as your son is in a safe and loving environment he will be fine. One thing I would recommend is making the time your with your son meaningful and quality. Though my sister has fond memories of our dad taking her to the movies and sleeping through the entire thing."
"As long as you’re spending time with your son and taking care of him when your home and while away that’s all that matters. You’re doing what you need to do to PROVIDE for your child. Don’t let no one make you feel bad about what you need to do as a parent to support your son. Your doing great."
"Growing up my dad was gone for sometimes months at a time through the union. Now as a grown woman of 23, all I can think when I look back is how proud I am to have a dad that went to such great lengths to take care of me and it makes the memories seem even that much more precious, I lost my dad when I was 20 and I feel him being away was him being a wonderful dad. Don’t beat yourself up"
"The fact that you worry about the time away shows you have your child’s best interests at heart, and at the end of the day, you really do have to do what you need to do for your child, no matter what it may be. If your child is happy, healthy and loved whilst you are gone, that’s what matters most. But if the day comes when he starts asking you to be present more, please try to listen and make that happen. Your little one will always remember who was there, if you can’t spend as much time as you’d like with him, make that time you do get memorable for you both. My sons dad works away and what he remembers and treasures most is the experiences they have together when they see each other, not what dad buys or sends home for him."
"You’re doing the best you can. You’re providing for him. At least you have your mom to help. Look for something local where your home at night if you feel your missing out."
"My granddad worked 14 hours a day for UPS and was only home at night to sleep. Got up at 2 every morning and went to work. He retired at 50. I’m sure it sucked for my dad and my uncle. I’m sure it sucked for my grandmother, but billed were always paid and he built a wonderful life for them. Now he spends all of his time with his family. You have to do what works for YOUR family. My dad was a single dad from the time I was 5 and my sister was 2. He worked 2 jobs for quite a while when we were younger. Spend as much time as you can with your son when you’re home!"
"Try looking for a local driving job so that you’re home more. Kids grow up fast."
"He will thank you someday for providing for him"
"I had to raise my kids like this too we are still really close tho. Some parents have to work alot to provide for them. I would spend all my extra time away from work with them"
"You are away to work & provide for your son….sounds like he is in good hands with his Grandmother."
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