I have a 5 month old baby girl and she is wonderful (a menace but wonderful). This past week has been awful for me. I have gotten a collective 10 hours of sleep because my daughter has been wanting to wake up every 30 minutes to eat or just make me suffer(the jury is still out on her intent). My husband asked me how I was doing and I told I was beyond exhausted. Here’s where I need to know if I’m alone here. He replied with “I know exactly how you feel, work was rough today.” I got so angry I had to walk away. Keep in mind, this man gets a full 8 hours a night uninterrupted. Yes I know being in the Army is hard but he is currently on desk duty due to profile for another 2 weeks. When I calmed down enough to explain why I was angry, I told him"You don’t know how I feel. I am with the baby all day everyday. I am awake all night with her until I pass out and then she wakes me up, if I’m lucky, an hour or 2 later. I can’t sleep during the day while she naps because I have to do laundry so we have clean clothes, I do the dishes so we can eat. Then I eat because I probably have forgotten to eat for the past 2 days. I shower and let the dogs out and then when I lay down, she wakes up for play time and a baby ASL YOUTUBE video for us to practice even though she can’t sign yet." “Then just don’t do all that and let me do it. You need to sleep baby.”"I have been asking you to do all that for 2 weeks…"So am I alone in being so angry when my husband says he knows exactly how I feel being so exhausted??
Ask for and accept help. Sometimes laundry won’t get done and the dishes will sit … men are dense and sometimes won’t know to help until you ask … stay at home mom is a tough thankless job. You have to prepare and accept your position and find what works for you. Take breaks and do it your way. There is no right way.
Did you call your baby a menace? 
You BOTH are exhausted and need to come up with a solution together instead of a battle over “who has a better reason”.
They are 2 totally different “jobs” that need their own individual recognition.
My suggestion… the laundry. The dishes. EVERYTHING CAN WAIT. Is there someone who baby can go to for 1 night? Then when baby gets home you nap when she naps. Your sleep is very important but honestly men don’t understand this completely. Hopefully you can have a gentler conversation together
How is a 5 month old a menace? Anyways u both can be exausted it shouldnt be a contest of who is more exausted. Sleep when baby sleeps. Other things can wait an extra hour or 2. Ur kinda doing this to ur self. Dad should be helpinh with things to when he not at work
babies can be hard but I wouldn’t say that’s her being a menace. If she’s waking you up that much during the night maybe something isn’t right with the food she’s getting. Give your husband the baby when he gets home and take a nap. Everything is harder when you’re tired
Welcome to motherhood. No one ever said it would be easy. That laundry and those dishes can wait til you and baby wake up lol
It’s a different kind of exhausted. And you’re being dramatic af. He’s exhausted because he has to go to work every day, he has to take care of all the bills, supporting his family, and whatever else he does. Dishes and laundry aren’t an all day chore and can definitely be skipped for a day so you can catch up on sleep and nap with your daughter. Yall both have an exhausting job. It’s not a competition on who’s more tired
A 5mo old has no INTENT. A5mo old is growing and eats accordingly. If you think she isnt getting enough milk, if youre nursing, suppliment with a bottle. No one said having and taking care of a baby is easy. Grow up and stop with the negativity.
When your husband gets home from work let him relax at a little bit then hand him the baby and you go out and do something for yourself that might help for a couple hours
This too shall pass. This is the mom thing. Your body will adjust. You’ll never not be tired again, promise. Lol
Try to sleep when she is sleeping. If you can’t get the chores done, it can wait!! If you are not your best self, you can’t be for the baby.
I always slept when my baby slept no matter what time of day. Especially if I needed it. I cleaned and did laundry while he was occupied in bouncy chair. Even when I showered. Took bouncy chair in bathroom with me.
I know how you feel. I just gave birth Monday and anytime my husband compares his tiredness to mine it makes me so mad. Like yea im sure it’s so exhausting getting to sleep through the night. When I say something about being tired or sore I don’t want to hear me too or comparisons just maybe an I’m sorry baby or how can I help. Don’tget me wrong he is a huge help with everything but this is something that irks me with him so I get it. And don’t even get me started on the rage I feel when he takes a nap 
It’s ok, mama 
if he says he is exhausted, he probably is. You are without a doubt, babies are known for causing exhaustion, I’m sure you were warned. It’s definitely a different exhaustion but it’s something you will learn to overcome (or not:woman_shrugging:). You have to nap with baby, also don’t let her nap so much during the day, she and all of you need to sleep at night, make a schedule and stick to it, it will be easier for you all and you will eventually get the rest you need. This didn’t happen to just you XXXOOO, it happens to every new mother/parents. Also, sorry but get used to it, you’ll be giving up all of you and your treasures for the rest of your life now. XXXOOO
Fuck the laundry and the dishes u have to sleep when she sleeps! Sleep is very, important to function.
Sophia Poulos if hes saying to leave the house work for him then why is she not??? Lmaoo bye 
Post partum anger and rage are very really things. Maybe go to the doc. Also sleep when baby sleeps and maybe discuss getting some extra help if possible maybe thru family or coordinating how to lighten your load
It sounds like he’s simply trying to sympathize with you on how you’re feeling the only way he knows how/understands. I can understand feeling frustrated/overwhelmed, but it doesn’t seem like he said “I know how you feel” as a way to belittle your feelings, but rather to make you feel less alone in your situation, even if that isn’t how you actually felt. I’d take a breath, let him help if he’s offering, and get some sleep, or whatever it is you’re wanting. New babies are tough, without a doubt, and your feelings are valid, but try taking a step back and recognizing that it truly does appear that he’s trying to be there for you. Baby blues, postpartum depression, anxiety, all of that is very real and though I’m not sure if you’re dealing with any of that… it could be a factor that makes you feel like he’s against you rather than on a team with you.
Sometimes you just have to sleep. Set her up safely with him while he’s watching TV and just go to bed. Don’t crazy for that whole 8 hours, if you’re anything like me to much sleep after not enough sleep is just terrible. And to all you people giving her shit for calling her baby a menace…stfu it’s just her sense of humor. I doubt she has ill intent. It’s about the same as the people who call their kids crotch goblins. To some it’s a term of endearment. Humor can be the last thing someone has between them and insanity.
She could have a little bit of colic. Waking up so many times.
Is she getting enough. If your breastfeeding. Talk to your doctor.
McCann you have someone come over for a few hours during the day, so you can nap.
I was an army wife for 13 yrs… it’s a rough life…what kind of profile does he still get up and go to pt? Just because he doesnt get up doesnt mean it doesn’t wake him when u get up…I totally understand though why him saying he feels the same would upset u…unless hes been deployed he doeant understand having to be up every couple hours never being able to get a full nights sleep then trying to take care of people with no sleep its rough for us attentive mommies. My ex army hubs never ever got up with any of the kids when they were babies never. I said f the house work and what not I took care of me a babies if I had the energy and time I’d do the house stuff if he didnt like the way I handled it he could have done it himself. Nap when the baby naps the dishes will be there when u get to them same with laundry and if ur hubs needs socks or uniforms and u didnt get to it he can do it himself. U absolutely need to take care of urself no one is going to so it for u!!! Also get involved in the FRG they will help with the meaningless tasks. The other wives will understand promise!!
A man will never realize or admit what a stay at home moms does every day and every night
u need a sitter. a chance to allow u sleep
Sleep… The chores will be there when u wake up…I’ve been a stay at home mom for 7 years… I totally understand where u are coming from 
it does get better…
He needs to help get up at night
…much harder staying home with the baby then going to work
Get baby cereal add tablespoon in bottle at night, sounds like she not getting full. Y’all both are exhausted. A mommy without sleep can be a lot. Before anyone comes fussing about cereal, my daughter pediatrician told me to put in her bottles. She was a preemie. Could not get her full , she would eat till sick then eat more.
Its sounds like she is still hungry so i would be adding some rice cereal, or baby food to her diet something. The exhaustion will get to you and he can help you with that.
He knows how you feel from a different perspective. He is tired from work, sitting at a desk all day dping paper work isn’t a stroll in the park. It gets overwhelming and boring at times. You on the other hand need to ask your husband when he is home to watch your baby so you can at least take a much needed nap or even a nice long bath. Something to fill your cup up.
Wake him up too remember so y’all can do it together… and he will see it not easy raising kids and maybe he will think about having more kids … don’t ever feel guilty having your man help you ever …
Put bigger hole in nipple… Add rice cereal. She will get full and sleep longer. Even if he does get up with baby you be wide awake watching and listening. Learn to sleep when baby sleeps
She’s in a sleep regression. Babies don’t manipulate you. It’ll pass, until then, tell him what needs done instead of expecting him to know, men don’t just know, they need asked.
It a different kind of exhaustion. Maybe let your baby learn to self-soothe ( that involves a little crying). It’s possible she isn’t always hungry, just bored/ wants attention. Relax. Whatever housework needs to be done will wait.
Sounds let you need to let some things go a bit. He’s offered to help why don’t you let him or give him something to do. Write him a list. But if she is down more during the day than at night you need to flip her. She has her days an nights mixed up if that’s the case. So do the flip with her. You put her in her crib and just flip her around and it will help her body to adjust. Most generally done at the time you want her to be going down for the night. But don’t feel bad my kids are no longer babies an they still wake up for things. I have 21 & 19 yr old and they’ll text me or call me in the middle of the night just to talk a second or just to hear me half ass awake breathing on the phone ( weirdos I know). An the ones still at home will come back to my room and lay in my bed for a few before returning to their own beds and they’re 16 an 12 so sometimes they just want to know you’re there.
Been there and I hear you. It’s such a hard time with lack of sleep and caring for a little one. My experience was I stopped doing housework… I cooked and ate what I could with one hand 
and I just let it all pile up. It’ll get done when he needs clean clothes or wants to eat. Do what you want to do sleep when the baby sleeps and screw the house work 
Put a little baby cereal in her bottle if she cant get full momma.
New babies do this to every mom and men just dont get it.
Definitely not alone or wrong. Take him up on his offer and go rest.
Maybe take rotating turns? When he’s home maybe he can give you a few hrs to nap? Hire a sitter for a couple hours a week to catch up on sleep? Every other day maybe put a chore or too aside and nap when baby does, they will get done. These times will pass and you will look back and miss them, but for now you must take care of yourself too and make sure to ask for help or tell others when you need help.
Stop trying to be a martyr; this time in your life will not last forever. Sleep when the opportunity exists, allow him to do housework when he gets home or do it every other day. I fail to see how two people would generate enough laundry, dishes or disorganization to require a lot of housekeeping on a daily basis. I also, will remind you that those options are off the table for working mothers that have used their maternity leave and are back to work. Make allowances for yourself, get some rest and stop making it a subject of discord in your home.
You are not alone , I have been a stay at home momma for 22 yrs I have learned the hard way so let me tell ya something I wish someone would of told me , call his bluff , leave the laundry/dishes/trash/vacuuming for him to do he also lives there yes he works but at this chapter you are needing to let him step up get your self taken care of and the baby I promise ya you will feel better if you do this
First and foremost most your feelings are validated. As someone that have 4 kids and one being an 8 month old, both husband and I work full time jobs, and I go to school, I understand exhausted. Because you’re exhausted that doesn’t mean he is not so instead of prioritizing who is more exhausted maybe try understanding where each other is coming from and work together, both of your contributions are important so look at it that way instead of trying to compare. When baby sleeps you have to sleep, laundry, dishes, and everything else can wait. You can’t take care of anyone if you don’t take of yourself. Create a schedule that allows rest for the both of you. Ask for help, both of you. I work from home with a baby, my husband comes home and I let him cool off and take time to process the day and I ask for an hour to myself, no kids. Not an everyday thing but there are days that I need it.
When it comes to calling your child a menace, I agree with some. Try not to, I am a social worker and what I can say thinking like that of any child has it’s affect.
Just wait till you have 3 more. You can do it
You aren’t wrong!! I thought my baby was a terrorist myself lol. He should help. I feel bad for you. You need some good sleep. You need it for her
many of us have gone through this, this too shall pass. Get a helper, get your sleep. Everything else can wait. The baby is not doing anything unordinary. Don’t take it personal. Motherhood, we are pushed beyond our limits. It all works out.
Your baby has trained you, rather than you training her. You need to put rice cereal in her bottle right before bed. Sounds like she also has her days and nights messed up. Wake her up more during the day so that at night she will be more tired to sleep. She’s gotten used to this new routine so you need to break it. That includes letting her cry at night for longer periods of time each night (i.e. 1st night 5 minutes, 2nd night 10 minutes, etc).
If he isn’t infantry his life is way easier than yours. That’s a fact. POG’s love to lead others to believe their job somehow involves sacrifice and isn’t just a 9-5.
Having been married to the military for 12 years I can tell you, even at a desk job they are tired but they’re a different kind of tired. So no he doesn’t get your kind of tired but you can’t dismiss his tired either. My husband can be that same way sometimes too. Our daughter is 7 now but when he’s gone and she’s sneaking candy, lying, copping attitudes, arguing with me for 3 hours over the laundry, arguing that its my fault she couldn’t finish 6 chicken nuggets in 90 minutes, shredding toilet paper out of boredom, scattering half a container of chia seeds all over the kitchen, yelling at me that I’m distracting her from cleaning the chia seeds, sneaking into the spice cabinet to eat half a container of sprinkles and being too rough with the dogs, all in a 3 day span, its REALLY hard to sympathize with my husband when he tells me he’s tired.
You need a break. Y’all need to work out a schedule. When our daughter was an infant we took shifts while he was on paternity leave. When he went back to work I got up at night with her Sunday-Thursday. He got up with her Friday and Saturday night so I could get two consecutive nights of real sleep a week. During the week he would do dinner time and get her ready for bed. It helped SO much
“My daughter” is said a whole lot. Start by saying “our daughter” and it will start to change your mindset, you’ll start to tolerate that sh!t less and make him get th fk up and help.
So why are u allowed to express ur hard day but he isn’t 
Also… a 5 month old a menace? That’s a little harsh for a tiny human who can’t walk or talk.
Welcome to motherhood and married life. It’s ok to be angry, but it’s not going to do any good. I remember these days so well. Only my husband was at the local hangout meeting his friends for a cold one. He even worked with them. It’s just how it is. You can yell and scream all you want. It won’t change. Now we have grandkids. Completely different. My husband is the best papa. I don’t work, he still does. When we have the grandkids overnight I send him to check on them when they scream at night. I can only tell you to nap when the baby nap’s. Everything gets done eventually. If it doesn’t, it will still be there. It’s not important. You and your child are important. Take care of yourself or nothing will be right in the world. I assure you I wish I wouldn’t have killed myself on nonsense. Enjoy the little thing’s. The laundry can be done in shifts.
I have learned that it is pointless to try to make them understand the level of exhaustion that we have. I think men try to empathize by saying they are tired and exhausted too but they will never understand just how much exhaustion moms have. Our bodies and hormones are crazy and we are in charge of keeping a tiny human alive while trying to do everything else. I don’t think they can even comprehend mom exhaustion. In my opinion it is a waste of energy to try to make them understand because they never will. I gave up on it. I’ve learned also that those chores can wait…they will still be there after a nap or rest. Let those chores stack up and let him do it when it bothers him. Your only job right now needs to be that baby and yourself. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Things will eventually get easier for you but for right now you have to figure out what works for you…what makes you feel better…what helps you to feel rested…and do those things. I did a lot of baby wearing while I did things around the house, I napped when I could (I have 3 kids so it was hard to find the time), I invested in a bouncer so I could take an actual shower and the biggest thing that helped was co-sleeping. I know that isn’t for everyone and not “safe” but it was the ONLY way I was able to get any sleep at night and that made all the difference. Hang in there momma…this is just a season in your life. You will find what works for you and be just fine. 
I agree with the other moms who have said put baby cereal in the bottle at bedtime. It works and you will get some sleep.
If she ate, changed burped everything and wants to just be awke just leave her in her crib and sleep unless she cries…
If it’s every 30, thicken the formula. At 5 months baby food and cereal should be getting introduced
Let her cry it out a little.
Skip the videos. At 5 months , why does she need to watch asl?
Skip dishes and all. I doubt letting them go til afternoon will prevent you from eating or wearing clothes.
I’m gonna start by saying DONT put rice cereal in her milk, multiple pediatricians have stayed this is no longer recommended as it is a hazard so ignore that advice telling you to do that. Second, DONT listen to the judgy Judy’s on here being hateful and telling you to get over it or stop arguing with your husband.
Lastly, it’s normal to feel frustrated at the situation. You are exhausted and trying to do it all. Its okay to let some things wait so you can rest. You can’t properly take care of baby if you can’t take care of you first. And yes he should be helping with things. And it’s okay to feel frustrated with him for not necessarily understanding your level of tired. Have him do cooking and dishes for a week so you can rest during that time.
Why is he getting to sleep through the night if he’s got “just a desk job” last I checked both parents made the baby so both need to pitch in at night. Yeah he goes to work for 8hrs but your on a 24hr schedule. You don’t get to punch out and go home so?
Instead of complaining on Facebook, hire a sitter so you can sleep, shower, go shopping, or soak in the tub. Where’s your family and friends…
You are becoming unhinged, and I am saying that with the most love, respect and support.
A 5 month old baby isn’t tormenting you, and she can’t choose to do that. Sounds like you’re starting to displace the very real and valid resentment towards your husband, onto your daughter. Don’t do this.
Your husband isn’t infantry, so he really doesn’t do anything work-wise…. POGs talk so much shit, and do nothing.
Just say no, just hand him the baby, that’s his child and he needs to have parenting time/ bonding time with his daughter, so he knows how to be a functioning parent. Give him the baby, and walk out. Get a hotel, have a rest, do whatever you want.
Get a maid. Yes really.
I get it but He has a right to be tired too a different tired but non the less it’s not a competition the way you are making his “deskjob” seem unimportant or less then is not fair either I know your tireds and its easy to get bitter instead just ask him to help or get help and YOU MUST SLEEP WHEN BABY SLEEPS or you’ll burn yourself out the chores can wait for a day am sure and Good for you on starting her early on asl I did the same we used miss patty asl on YouTube
I would speak with your pediatrician prior to just adding cereal like many suggest. It is just a filler and you could possibly start adding in normal foods to help her appetite to give the nourishment she needs vs just a filler.
As far as it goes with your husband - I did it without one and worked. So my advice is strictly based on other relationship obstacles not expirence when it comes to raising a child with someone, especially as a baby. Relationships as challenging and the biggest obstacle is clear communication and as women we have a ton going on in our minds most times I can’t remember if I told my boyfriend how I feel or I just felt them and got angry he didn’t get it. Men don’t carry the child and seem to have more of a disconnect in the early years vs mom’s who carried baby for 9 months. Communicate and just as you did when upset by his response take some time regroup and go back. He offered to let you sleep and he’d help you out. So instead of assuming he won’t or that just because he didn’t in the past doesn’t mean he won’t now. Find what works to communicate what you need help with to him. Sticky notes, a list on the fridge, a text, a note app you can share notes with each other. Give him some items to take off of your plate. If you find he isn’t doing as he said sit down and discuss it further. You’re exhausted and burn out is very real - so give yourself grace and him grace while navigating all of this together.
It is frustrating but men are generally clueless when it comes to recognizing all that we do. If you don’t ask for specific help, you won’t get it. He’s willing to help so stop putting it all on yourself and tell him what you need. I’d wake up and feed the babies and then wake my husband to put them back in their cribs. You can’t be resentful if you didn’t ask for help.
Feelings are always valid and allowed, it’s how you choose to act that really matters.
It’s okay for you both to express your levels of exhaustion, no one needs to compare.
My husband is also Army, and it’s a whole new level of exhaustion for them.
I recommend following this group Biologically Normal Infant & Toddler Sleep
It is normal for baby to be waking and feeding, she is gearing up for a growth spurt or a developmental leap. Do rest when baby is resting. The dishes can wait, laundry can wait an extra hour or two. Reach out to your community. The Army community is vast and there are those willing to help.
You got this I’m single mom been single mom for over three years it’s not easy my daughter dad passed away when she was 17 months old my situation maybe different but there’s a lot guys out there that don’t understand what is women goes threw when it comes too so all the work to raising a child and house work and all that the biggest thing I learned is if she’s sleeping u sleep no matter what has to be done and when she wakes up take care of her and do what u gotta do put her in safe place with toys and shows and if she need u she let u know.
It sounds like your kiddo needs a routine. When my kiddo was 5 months old we woke up at 630 everyday for a bottle. After that we would stay up till 9 then nap for 2/2.5 hours then up till 1/2 then nap for 2/2.5 hours then up till 6/7 then an hour/hour and a half nap, then down around 9. She would wake up two or three times overnight for food but back to sleep. You could put her in a bouncer or walker while you do the dishes and talk to her. Tell her what you are doing. Mommy is doing the dishes right now from dinner last night. I’m putting the silverware in the dishwasher. The dishwasher is a machine that cleans dishes using water and special dishes soap. I’ve put spoons and knives in. Now I’m working on this plate. That pasta is really caked on so I’m going to rinse it first. Now that it isn’t as messy I’ll put it in the dishwasher. Etc. she’s learning about words and vocabulary that way.
And if you do that stuff while he is at work he can’t help with it when he gets home. Maybe ask him to take a night shift so you can get a full 8.
I’d give him Friday to Sunday night and that’s your me time to sleep and have your time. Bet he doesn’t make it that long. Then he will rethink his answer…lol after all…it’s his kid too!
He wants to be with you but he could never understand until he does diaper duty etc.
Ummm he said not to do the extra stuff, then don’t. Let him take some duties. Don’t “remind him”… when he comes home simply say “the dishes aren’t done” and leave it at that. Buy paper plates and stuff to make some days easier.
Then hand the baby over with a bottle and burp towel and walk away. Go lock yourself in the bathroom with a blue tooth speaker and soak in the tub. Pamper yourself, shave your legs (if you do that), deep condition your hair, face mask. Your anxiety is going to roar if you hear her cry… let HIM FIGURE IT OUT! He has to learn about his baby and if you always are doing it he won’t ever learn. Get out of the shower and lotion up and brush your hair and teeth. Put on some super comfy pajamas. Do NOT take the baby from him. Make you both a sandwich, go eat in your room, take a nap. Leave the rest to him. Literally walk away. (If the baby is bottle fed, if not pump and start letting baby have a bottle daily.)
Take your baby to the doctor. At five months they should be sleeping more. Baby could have developed reflux or some other issue.
You gotta control your anxiety and this sounds like a first baby. Yes HIS job is tough and can be physically demanding with physical training and such, even if he is on desk duty currently. Work of any kind has its own draining issues. Many don’t understand physically exhausted and mentally and emotionally exhausted at the same time. Also…. See if a family member or friend can come sit with you while you nap once in a while and pay them with coffee, chat and dinner. 
you HAVE to take breaks with a demanding baby. Period.
Let him dig deep in the trenches and take some duties of the baby. He can hold and feed and burp her while you fix dinner and make lunch for the next day. He can bathe her and put her to bed and deal with her until it’s time for him to crash for the night. These little breaks in duties helps a lot. Let him deal with the baby and make dinner and deal with the dogs a couple nights a week.
Divide and conquer!
And yes… you had every right to be upset and mad. But on the flip side, if he has NEVER had to take on 48 hours with a baby and take care of a home, he has NO clue.
And baby may still be hungry, talk to the doc about adding cereal to her diet to see if that helps hold her over. That feeding pattern is beyond a cluster feeding.
It’s a very normal reaction to have and your feelings are absolutely valid… sleep deprivation on top of frustration, lack of normal schedule, food, etc… of course you’re gonna react this way. Take his offer. STOP DOING THE CHORES DURING THE DAY UNTIL BABY IS ON A BETTER SCHEDULE. Leave it for him to do after work. Take those naps. Do not feel bad at all when you do!
When tired it’s hard to control emotions. But you invalidating him is not OK. Just because it’s a different kind of work
Find a better routine.
There’s no point in getting yourself exhausted, worked up, etc and then getting mad at your husband because he doesn’t understand and has a different level or reason for his own exhaustion.
If baby is waking frequently, you need to increase how much they’re eating. Is baby breastfed as to why YOU’RE the one waking? Are you producing? Either way, baby isnt getting enough so baby is gonna wake again hungry. Tire baby out before bed time with play and a full belly. Get a sleep schedule planned and stick to it. You’re already exhausted, may as well make it purposeful lol.
You need to sit with your husband and plan this out. Either he let’s you sleep in or takes over the house work.
Ugh! I know how you feel! My husband is in the Army too. Yes, I know it’s not easy. But he sleeeeeeeps! When my boys were younger, I was the one up at night with them. Then I worked during the day. Now I stay at home and they’re better sleepers now that they’re 5 and 3.5, but those first few years were ROUGH!
I remember with my eldest I was alone staying by family , working during the day , then going home and having to walk up and down with baby because we could not disturb rest of household I was a Zombie …then with second one married …I was working and had to clean house ,cook after work and husband did not help at night similar scenario …he just tried to help once during the night and never again…you get through it …it gets easier I promise you hang in there 
I know how you feel. It was the same with my youngest. You have my sympathies.
He loves and cares about you. He’s trying to support and sympathize with you. Parenting is hard and it’s exhausting.
The chores can wait til hubby gets home… He’s been asking you for 2 weeks to let him help you out by doing the chores so that you can sleep bc he’s worried about you not sleeping as well. . So let your hubby help you out. You can’t pour from an empty cup and you have basic needs too and sleep is one of them. . Sleep when the baby sleeps and don’t worry about the chores until both of you wake up
Sit down with him and compromise a solution so that you’re getting adequate rest too. Like ya know you do all the chores and he takes care of the baby that night and vice versa. 
He will never know or understand! Nap when the baby naps and clean when she’s awake. Let him “HELP” when he gets home. He will see what you do.
Go to a counselor that is knowledgeable or specialized in maternal mental health… co parenting strategies and sleep hygiene… this type of sleep deprivation will lead to health consequences… perinatal anxiety and worse… hearing how you are viewing the baby as being manipulative… it’s a red flag… babies don’t do things to upset you… been through this exact situation and counselor saved me and my brain… and inspired me to specialize in maternal mental health… best wishes…
The reaction isn’t warranted. The exhaustion and frustration are normal feelings but you need to work with him.
If he says not to do those chores, don’t. Let him get around to doing them.
Self-care is just as important as taking care of the baby—because you’ll be no good to anyone if you’re in the hospital.
Paper plates and plastic utensils were GODSENDS in that infant period, too.
And while your hubby may not be exhausted from baby duty, know that the desk job can be a whole other kind of exhausting. If it’s military, it’s even worse.
Remember, YOU’RE ON THE SAME TEAM! And it does sound like he wants to help.
No way was you wrong! But, You need to tell him you need his help, Remember Men are from “Mars” and “Women “ are from “ Venues “. So you need to explain your thoughts to him!!! Good luck.
Let the chores go. Sleep girl. That baby will eventually take longer naps. Take care of yourself. If you are too tired, accidents are more likely to happen without being fully functional.
My doctor had me out some cereal in the bottle when my kids were a month old because they were always hungry. They grew up just fine. I would suggest you talk to her pediatrician and see what you can do.
All of this is normal momma. Remember communication is key. Don’t let any feelings stay bottled up. Good or bad.
Take a deep breath and take a min.
Do the important things and take time for yourself. Which is important. You can not function for long if you don’t care for yourself as well. Show him and let him see what you do. And don’t forget to communicate. You got this.
Get some paper plates or better yet buy some premade meals you just have to put in the microwave. That will eliminate dishes. I’m not saying do this long term but it can be helpful for now. It’s ok to live out of a clothes basket. Wash, dry but don’t hang or fold. Put her in mostly 1 piece outfits like sleepers so it’s less hassle. I love that you’re having her watch ASL videos. She does absorb what she sees even if she can’t do it yet. But try a book with simple signs instead. TV can overstimulate. Might be a factor to why she’s not sleeping. Try a baby carrier so you can wear her while you do necessary things while she’s awake. Talk to her a lot. Tell her colors, shapes, spell words. She’s soaking in everything & loves to hear momma’s voice! Sleep when she sleeps.
You’re valid in your feelings towards your husband. Men just don’t get it. You need to tell him specifically what you need. Have him play, bond with baby when he gets home so you can sleep undisturbed. He’s a grown man he can certainly cook a meal for you both, feed baby if bottle fed & entertain her.
You are going to go into a severe depression if you do not get some sleep…I know, I did. I was in the exact same situation except I had other kids and my husband was in the Air Force. My husband was either deployed or TDY for the first 2 years of my last child’s life. It’s been 14 years and I think I am still tired from those first two years. My baby had a heart monitor and it would beep every 13 minutes from her stopping breathing and I’d jump up terrified something happened. She is fine now btw. Give your baby to your husband on the weekends and sleep. I understand why you’re angry and it just makes it worse when you haven’t slept at all. I would go crazy on my husband when he’d say he was tired after sitting at a desk all day and being able to sleep for 10 hours.
Unfortunately that’s the way men are.
I think working is just as hard as parenting in some respects so your all tired in your own rights
Why are you COMPARING yourself and your husband? That’s a complete waste of time. You both have your own separate issues and you both deserve relief. Instead of one-upping him like a child, understand that this moment in time is temporary. One day your kid won’t want anything to do with you. Soak these clingy moments up and embrace the mess that is motherhood. It is your inherent job as a woman and mother. Seek support! There’s church and other moms out there who understand how you’re feeling. Stop expecting such an impossible task from your man husband. Men and women are completely different. Know your role and behave accordingly. Too many men and women trying to compete and it’s damaging the relationship entirely.
Yes you were wrong he was trying to be empathetic in the best way he knew how and seems like you exploded…let him be it will all be fine but you need to apologize and arrange for you to have some alone time to sleep!!! Also when baby sleeps you sleep no excuses rule of thumb
Ive being the stay home parent of twins and a baby, had to clean house and also was working from home, now we inverted the roll Im the one working outside the house 13h a day, on my days off I still do all the things house related, kids related, my husband now complains how hard was his day and he has no clue how hard was my day dealing w all my work issues. Theres no better or worst job, you can’t tell him he is less tired than you, I understand very well slepless nights trust me, but work outside the house is another level of tiredness, sometimes drain us and sometimes its a break from other problems. You are probably mad because you are tired, get a babysitter or family help and try rest a bit it all shall pass. Ps: I have zero family around, zero help besides me n my husband here, so it’s possible and will be better in couple years 
You should take that baby to her pediatrician if she is needing to eat every 30 minutes at 5 months old. Either she is teething early or what she is eating is not satisfying her needs
Try to enjoy your time with the baby and not think of it as deprivation. This time will pass so fast.
Most men are so oblivious to everything that they don’t notice when stuff needs doing & you need help. You have to tell them, usually a few times before it sinks in.
You talk a lot of shit about that lil baby ,
You’re angry because you’re exhausted. Hand him the baby ND go take a nap.
I am going thru the same thing your going thru. My baby doesn’t want to sleep long but wakes up every 20 min every other hour or hour and I have had lack of sleep due to him and my husband works too so as soon as baby starts crying I run out of our room with the baby pacing around the house calming him down and feeding him and once I get him back to sleep I go to bed and it literally feels like I slept for only a few min before the baby starts crying. I know how you feel girl. And it’s rough my husband had the same reply. He works out in the heat in 100 degree weather all day and so I try to understand he’s wore out and I feel bad he’s in the heat all day but on the weekends I expect him to help since he’s off . I sat mine down and talked to mine and he had our baby for a couple hours on his day off while I was in the house still but I had him see how hard it is with our fussy baby and 3 other kids . My husband gets nervous when the baby cries so he seemed to understand a bit more. I told him my mental health is Important that I needed a break and that he should help me when he’s off so I hope maybe if you talk to yours hopefully and praying he has an open heart and fully listening to you because I know your exhausted and wore out but your doing great. Our babies won’t be babies much longer. 
and you will miss this when their older. Trust me I know this is my last baby and I have 3 other kids 4 6 and 9 and I definitely keep telling myself he’s only this little for only a little longer.
I have been both ends. The working parent and the stay at home parent. Both is exhausting, just a different type of exhaustion. You can’t compare the 2. If you need a day to yourself, take it. Laundry can wait, order take out. Spend a day just laying around with babes having a lazy day to recoup.
If your daughter is waking you up to eat every 30 minutes she needs food . Put a little rice cereal maybe a teaspoon to start in her bottle with a bigger nipple on it . It will fill her belly especially at bedtime . If your breast feeding you may not be supplying enough milk . My granddaughter did this to my son and his wife . Until I stepped in they listened it worked .