Hii, not entirely sure if this is just like, baby blues, ppd, or completely normal so I figured I’d get some advice from a few outside perspectives.
My son’s a week old today (c-section baby) and since I’m still very young, we live w/ my mom. She took two paid weeks off work to stay home and help me since I’m a first time mom (and, again, young).
Since he’s been born (even in the hospital) I’ve just felt inadequate. I have an aunt (my mom’s sister) that doesn’t do well taking care of her kids and gets talked about a lot because she has her mom take care of her kids most of the time because she doesn’t want to. I hate to feel like I’m doing the same, but it sincerely seems to me that it’s a similar situation. I love my son to pieces and do want to take care of him myself w/out help but I can’t do everything myself right now because of the c-section. I do feed him and change him and get him to sleep. He spends most of the day w/ me but for the first few days home, my mom was doing baby laundry and washing bottles. I’ve started doing these things on my own but still doing feel like I’m doing enough for him.
We’ve been home for four days and since he was born I’ve felt like I’m not doing enough? Or that he would have been better off w/ a different family (I was urged to put him up for adoption throughout my pregnancy). Is this normal or something I should worry about?
You are doing good mama, it will get easier. If your mom wants to help, let her. It takes a village to raise a child.
Be easy on yourself. Even us moms who didn’t have them through c section appreciate help. Nothing wrong with your mom helping. You’ve got this.
Honey c section you cant do alot for 3 more weeks. Just feed change cloth baby. Hold him love him. Make a meal if you can. Bring garbage out. Little things.
You literally just had major surgery.
Take all the help you can get, and let that guilt go <3
Best thing to do is talk to your doctor. The fact that you are so worried about this already makes you a good mom.
Girl you just had a major surgery! Now you’re caring for a newborn. Trust me, you’re doing great mama. 
One day at a time. You’ve got this!
You sound like you’re doing great babies are hard work it’s ok to get help especially being a new mom you also had a major surgery try not to stress and accept the help its definitely a different situation then your aunt you actually want to take care of your son and every young mom feels like their baby would be better off with someone else but it simply isn’t true
You’re doing great! I’m pretty sure that your momma doesn’t mind helping you out a bit and I bet she’s pretty excited with taking care of your LO.
If she wants to help let her help! C-section is rough on a body and you’re not even a week post partum! Don’t feel bad or guilty.
It takes a village.
Just keep an eye on the way you’re feeling, stay aware of ppd and if you continue to feel this way talk to someone!
Truthfully, ALL AMAZING MOTHER’S feel this exact way.
I think many young mothers have felt like this. It’s ok - you will be fine! Trust me, no one will take better care of that baby than you!! Let’s your mom help a little, she wants to and anyone can use a little help. Soon GMA will be back to work and you will do wonderful with your baby. Hang in there! One day at a time.
Girl, first off, you just had major abdominal surgery. Relax and care for you and baby. There are things you shouldn’t even be thinking about doing right now. You shouldn’t be lifting anything heavier than your baby. Accept help until you’re healed enough to do everything on your own. You only get one chance to heal right. You’re doing right by your baby giving yourself a chance to heal correctly. From one C-section momma to another.
You had a c section. No matter age you are a your only job is to be there to hold and feed and bond with your brand new baby. If you have help take it because you shouldnt even be doing anything right now besides relaxing. Laying in bed. Sitting down. Holding baby. Dont even worry about anything else as long as your baby is fed and changed and you feel comfortable everything else can wait at this point. Your not doing anything wrong. If people are making you feel that way they are wrong because a c section in top of a newborn is huge thing. Its a major painful surgery with a long recovery time.
Take the help where its offered. You may feel bad now but looking back you will appreciate it and feel very loved. I was one of the not so fortunate ones in the help department. I had to go back to my original routine after my return home and wished I had had help. Not having help makes you feel worse. Hang in there, everything will work itself out in time. You’ll find your groove and get comfortable. Good luck 
congrats on your new baby
Be very greatful for your. Mom for helping you out. You will do just fine as soon as you feel better. As for your relative. That is the way she wants to be but you do not. Sound like you want to be like that. You will do fine. Even If You are young. Thousands. Of other young mothers do just. fine
Okay, first of all. PPD is normal, baby blues ARE NORMAL. Dont beat yourself up so much. That fact that you are so worried about it means you are doing it right. I wish I had the help with my first (and I had a vaginal delivery). I cannot even imagine taking care of a baby on my own after such a major surgery (I dont know how you cesarean mommas do it).
Speak with your doctor about your concerns and take it one day at a time… you and baby are both still learning.
Yes! This is so normal hun. My son is 7 months old and I still have those thoughts. You are doing amazing. Your tired, your body hurts, your pouring all that love into another human. I am also young and had my parents help for the first few months. Your mom is helping her baby, who just had her own little baby. Accept the help and dont feel guilty! Your going to develop and unconditional bond with your child and these feelings will start to fade. Dont be too hard on yourself love.
You’ve just had major abdominal surgery. I’m a doula and have witnessed C/S. You don’t want to know what they do to your body during one. You are healing from MAJOR surgery. I think what you’re doing after only a week is amazing. I think you need your mom there for 2 weeks for actual, physical help and not because you are inadequate in any way. Just the fact that you’re cognizant of this and asking the questions, tells me you’re going to be just fine and so is your precious boy. Relax, Mamma. You’re doing great.
Ur doing good a c- section will limit u for a little bit til ur not sore ive had 2 an it takes a lot my mom as well stayed with me for a week bc I had one in school as well to help me so dont be afraid to ask for help or take any that is given an it does help to talk to ur doc as well dont be ashamed to tell him/her how u feel there is nothing wrong with getting any type of help ! But ur doing great keep up ur good work !! An dont be afraid to talk to someone if u feel overwhelmed it helps to let someone know !
Let your mom help while you heal. Just do what you can. As you start to feel better and get more into a routine, and just use to having a baby. Youll start doing more. . right now baby just wants you to hold. Feed and change em. . get rest while your mom is watching him. Even its for 20 minutes. . .
I had a csection with my second and my husband and my mom (who flew out from FL to VA) were doing a lot for me and baby as well. Don’t feel inadequate just because there’s someone there to help you. Having a csection is rough and it takes time to get back into the groove of things. You’ll find over time and once you’ve healed, you’ll be doing all the things you hoped to do for your child.
Everyone needs help. Everyone. We aren’t meant to raise babies alone.
That’s why they say, it’s takes a village.
Don’t be too hard on yourself.
I went through the same thing…it gets better, promise! Just get someone to come over and help out a little bit and a shoulder to cry on. Go talk to your OBGYN and tell them what’s going on. Chin up
You will be okay. You wanting to do more is the start of being a good mom. But let your doctor know how you’re feeling. Talk to your mom too. Above all, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF! Your son needs a healthy momma. The more rest you get, the faster you will heal.
hey mama! csections are SO HARD. momming is SO HARD. the hormone mess is SO HARD. what you shared does sound like all of the same emotions I had and what many other moms have said as well- it’s a VERY hard transition into motherhood and I also felt extremely unprepared and overwhelmed by these thoughts. if you feel like it’s getting in the way of taking care of your baby or you, or you’re feeling so low that you think your baby would be better off without you, please go talk to a doctor, or you can call a help line Help for Moms | Postpartum Support International (PSI) but just please know your baby needs YOU mama, and that you’re so capable (as capable as any of us!) and it DOES get easier. it took me a year for my PPD to clear up because i let it go unchecked and unsupported. don’t be like me. if you need help, get it! thinking of you, you will be a great mother because you are concerned about being a great mother. you got this! last thing- try to be gentle on yourself okay? this is a PROCESS.
Right now this is normal. After having my 4th my mom did a lot for me because I just wasn’t up for it. After a bit I came around. If you still feel down and out by your 6 week appt bring your concerns up to your Dr.
The fact that you are worrying about whether or not you’re doing enough for your child tells me that you care. You are not your aunt and you’re proving that by making a conscious effort to do and be a great mom everyday. Your baby boy is blessed to have you, and you’re blessed to have your mama who is there to jump in and help.
The first 6 weeks (at least) post-partum is HARD- physically, mentally and emotionally. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having help and support. Rest as much as you can and heal while your mom is there to help, bond with your baby every chance that you get. You’re doing a great job!
It takes a village to raise a child, that is sooo true. Let your mom help while she can… It doesn’t sound like you have the same mindset as your aunt. You’ll be on your feet and doing it on your own in no time! Trust, then you will be ready for your mom’s help, just so you can shower in peace!! Your blessed 
Honey you’ve been home 4 days- you need someday to help & thats fine. I’m a nana and my son & daughter n law lived with me when their first baby was born. I helped wirh everything. I would get the baby when I got up " usally early" and told her to rest. Its good that you got your mom to help. Just do as much as you can handle while you’re healing from being cut open. I think you’re just nerves. As long as you’re there doing for your baby & not running out on him you’re doing good. Relax - take the help & get well. Good luck. You don’t sound like a bad mom to me…
Girl the first week home my grandma insisted on coming for a week she cooked for us cleaned and did laundry as well as help care for my baby. She’s done it for all of her daughters and me now too. Don’t feel guilty at all! You’ll eventually catch up with everything. Remember your baby needs a happy momma not s perfect momma
I was 17 when I had my first baby. Mom is there to teach you. Enjoy the help and you are doing what a mom does, loving him! Your doing great! It might be PPD. I had that with my one son. Talk to your doctor. Congrats on the little guy.
You care. You have a mom that cares and is willing to help also, just don’t take advantage of the situation and so everything you can to have the best life for your child. Finish school, take online classes. Something. You’re only stuck in this situation forever if you choose to be and it sounds like your aunt chooses to be.
Dude, you had a c section. Give yourself a break. Your still recovering from surgery. You’ll be able to do more when your body recovers.
Chill out it’s only been 4 days
Give yourself a break. You have had major surgery . Take things slow. You have your entire life ahead to do all his laundry and everything else he needs .