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QUESTION:

"I have been together with my partner for 10 years and have five kids together but we are always fight over everything from taking care of kids Basically all our fight is about kids none stop so I’m tired of this and I need some advice of what to do or I’m over reacting. Message below is from him try to describe me as a bad person. I got up this morning got kids ready for school dropped them off was back, start preparing breakfast and lunch for other kids went shopping and was back plus my have to go to drop off my other kids to his therapy appointment after all of that he sent me that message "I wish you know how disorganized, abusive, angry ...... & stubborn you are!!!! On top of that I wished you could listen & take advice. Everyone is suffering in this house including this hungry baby who can’t stop crying right now, all because of what I just mentioned above besides your miscalculation of things, time & wrong decisions""

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"Time to end it, for the kids sake and your own happiness."

"if you have more bad days than good days together, then it’s time to end it. The kids will be the ones that suffer especially if the parents are always fighting and unhappy together."

"Well, look, I don’t think anyone should say “you don’t listen” like first of all I’m not ur fuckin child, jot that down. But, I do think you need to ask him to elaborate on the rest of the situation. Like, if there is a problem you could work on, why wouldn’t you? If there’s a problem with him, then make sure you tell him to work on that too."

"He is an adult and a father. He can deal with things if you aren’t around or haven’t done things just so. Sounds like he just wants you to have everything done so he doesn’t have to do anything. Has he always been like this or is this something new? You guys either have to work together or things will just get worse."

"I’m ending a 10 year marriage with 2 kids because of behavior like that. It’ll just keep on going."

"Tell him to do it himself if he thinks he can do it better. 5 kids is not as easy as it sounds as well as getting yourself ready."

"Sounds like gaslighting to me. He knows you do everything but he needs you to feel weak & powerless. Girl, LEAVE NOW. Its going to get worse until he screws up your head. I’m actually surprised you have survived 10 years with him."

"You are doing your best. His got no right to make you feel less of a person"

"You’ve got to think about your kids, you have to disengage, or diffuse the arguments with your husband, children will become damaged with continued exposure to that, the texts are just an immature psychological display of an ill prepared father"

"Let him take over all the duties if he doesn’t like how you are handling things."

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