all you can do is be there for her ask her questions my daughter told me she was pan sexual i had no idea what she ment but i just give her a hug asked if she was happy and then when she went to bed googled what it ment and the next time she brought it up i knew what to ask her she said she was worried to tell me but i just told her i love her no matter what who she loves or wants to be with its her choice at the end of the day my son told me he also likes boys and girls i just told him you can have a boyfriend or a girlfriend i dont care but they hurt you i will hurt them just support your child and let them know you are there for them thats all they want
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Iâve just come to say your a fab grandparent 
itâs so nice that youâve reached out and asked for help to understand it.
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It means she doesnât identify with either gender or that she identify as both. I am non-binary as is my trans wife. Research the gender gingerbread man diagram!
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Or, you could ask HER why she needs the attention
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Wtf is wrong with people honestly! If he feels comfortable as she then let them if she feels comfortable as a he then let them if they wanna live free with no labels then let them who is anyone to talk or tell someone how to live and what gender !! Can we not all just let people live a happy excepting life and stop labeling people!!
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My daughter came out as bisexual at 13 sheâs not 14 and she uses they/them pronouns. Im proud of my beautiful brave girl for living her life and feeling like she can be herself. Iâm glad your granddaughter could come to you!
I think you are amazing for wanting to understand and support! Donât listen to the silly remarks, at least you asked, at least you didnât shut down the conversation there and then and at least your willing to try and help! Keep doing what your doing you sound like an amazing grandparent! 
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Non binary isnât about sexuality itâs about gender. Your granddaughter doesnât feel that they are a girl or a boy just a person. Instead or being called she/her she wants to be called they/them. I donât know much else about it but just love her as you usually would and she will be fine and respect her decision
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Ask her. Tell her you love her no matter what just need to understand what it is
Grow together
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I would sit down and have a talk with her about it. Ask her what that means so she knows that you want to understand.
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Does this mean she donât identify herself as female or male? I think that what it means x
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When one is nonbinary, it means the individual is not identified as female or male.
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If I understand it correctly⌠She identifies as neither and both genders. She is neither female or male identity. Honestly the best thing you can do is ask what pronouns they want to identify as and follow that as closely as possible. It confirms their identity is valid, respected, and heard. They (your grandchild) may ask for a more gender neutral name as well.
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It means they donât identify as male or female but somewhere in between or neither
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It means she doesnât identify as male or female. Instead of referring to her as she/her she will have preferred pronouns she will want to go by and possibly a different name. Sit down with her and ask how you can make her comfortable in her transition
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Just let it ride. Ask her what she thinks it means and see if she still feels the same as time goes on. Donât judge her
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This usually means someone doesnât identify as any gender. They usually prefer different pronouns, so I would ask to see if she prefers she or they.
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https://instagram.com/stylebydeni?igshid=zz2jm5qe8k4t
Deni has recently came out to their fam as non-binary. He does a lot of educating of their insta page.
My seventeen year old daughter just told me this too, following this for advice
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It means they do not identify as male or female and would most likely want to use they/them pronouns. They need love and support and to know that it is ok to be that way and that their feeling are valid and theyâre important.
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I love that youâre asking questions. It means youâre accepting and growing. Youâre a wonderful grandma. 
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My 13 year old is also saying this 
This is a GREAT book to read.
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This is what I found
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Another good book, the bible⌠read it. Then get a science book. There two genders. Quit being soft on these kids. Youâre not helping them. Youâre crippling them.
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I used to work with someone who preferred they and them pronouns rather than gender (him/her)
Mad respect to you for asking!! So many people would just ignore it and keep on keeping on. Mad respect!!!
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Itâs new and I didnât understand it at first.
My 13 year old explained it to me.
They donât see them self sexual.
There none sexual and not attracted to either sex.
I do LGBTQAI+ 
ally training at my work. Feel free to message me.
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There are two genders. Male and Female. This is determined at the moment of conception. There should be NO confusion about them
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My son explained it like this. If boys are blue and girls are pink, then he is purple. He doesnât identify or âfeelâ masculine but he also doesnât feel or want to be feminine.
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I just read this book to teach myself and it was quite helpful. Youâre a wonderful grandmother for learning how to support your grandchild in the way they need.
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Just let her know that you love her regardless as to what she identifies as and that you are and always will be suppirtive and there if needed.
Disregard all the assholes. Non-binary is usually someone who doesnât refer to themselves as a him or her more so them and they. I would personally suggest that you sit down and talk with them to show that you still love them no matter what and ask if they have any preferences on what you do call them. That alone will mean so much to them!
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You use pronouns such as they and them they arenât a specific gender and to all the bible thumpers out there honestly keep your mouth shut this grandma is trying to understand her granddaughter and be loving and accepting you all should be ashamed of yourselves with your nasty comments
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Just keep loving your grandchild as you always have. Ask them questions about what this means to them and how you can support them.
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Nonbinary= âI donât like being called boy or girl or in-between.â
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Iâm sorry I thought this said 13 month old 
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They donât identify with male or female, usually people who are non-binary prefer they/them pronouns but Iâm sure theyâd be happy to tell you what they prefer if you ask, along with most questions. Just make them feel seen and making an effort to understand Iâm sure means a lot. Great job mom for reaching out when not understanding instead of lashing out Iâm sure your child will feel much better coming out with your support
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SoooooâŚto all the people saying âread a science book, there are two gendersââŚwhat you mean is there are two sexes. Gender is a social construct⌠dumbasses. If she doesnât feel like she falls into either social constructs, then it seems like a personal problem for those that have an issue with it.
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Means she either feels like a blend of both genders or she feels like she doesnt fit in either category.
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In some Native American traditions the child chooses their gender or identity and their name. There are also five genders within the Cherokee Nation as I understand it. My motherâs heritage is Native American. (Cherokee Nation)
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This isnât meant to be rude, but ask your child. See what they are thinking and feeling and just support whatever it is that they says. I think asking them shows you care about them and their thoughts, opinions and feelings. It opens up the lines for communication and youâll know exactly how they are feeling.
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I just canât with this world anymore.
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My 14 year old also came out as nonbinary For them it feels like theyâre not a boy but also not a girl. They changed their name and pronouns too to He/they.
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I donât get it either. If thatâs what happened to whoever it is, Jenner,I donât want to know
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Please donât bite my head off⌠but I find that a bit ridiculous. Either boy/girl or man/woman , there is no in-between.
I do understand what being gay, lesbian, transvestite etc is , just not this.
By the way my oldest son is gay and Iâm so proud of him 
Also a very young child to make a choice like this.
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Naomi Shepherd can you help?
I would honestly use this as a great learning subject for you⌠explain that you love them regardless but ask them to educate you about what it means
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Not to be curt, but perhaps she should be the one to educate you on what that means to her. sheâs come out so what does that mean?
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just a made up term to make people feel good about themselves.
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Hi find out what they preferred to be called if itâs a different name use it as much as possible, they have preferred pronouns as well,
My eldest came out last year and has a new name that we use, and preferred pronouns are they and them. Just continue to love them the way you always have, let them know your a safe person to come to. And correct others nicely that call them she or her or the wrong name
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It is a mother word for gender less people those who do not conform to male female identity, not the same as cross dressing but dress as either or both, itâs a growing phanoman of present times, just treat her the same but cards etcetera should just have happy birthday with no mention of gender 
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Look into gender dysphoria⌠The Gender Dysphoria Bible :: That's Gender Dysphoria, FYI . This is a good resource for someone who wishes to understand
I wrote this as a comment to one comment, but as I scroll through I see a lot more of you, unfortunately, that should see it:
Sounds to me like you could all stand to educate yourselves on this topic instead of deciding your opinions are enough when it comes to support. What if your gay and lesbian friends are also nonbinary? Youâre saying your support stops at their sexual preference, it does not extend to their sexual identity.
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Show her the same kinda love you would show to any of your other grandkids.after all love concords everything.
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My daughter is 12 and just came out as non binary as well. We are trying to support her but donât understand it. I could use some help as well.
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Itâs a spectrum of gender identities that are not masculine or feminine
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Non binary. She doesnât see herself as a female or male, she doesnât want to use the genderizing terms. She is an it.
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Ask them to define it for youâŚit can mean a lot of different things to different people
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Iâll get hate for this but⌠There is no such thing. Your child needs help now the most. God bless
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Just as her what pronouns she prefers and try your best to use them. Sheâs still the same person you know and love
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Simple. Ask your grandchild to define it for you. It means different things to different people.
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They donât feel particularly like a man or woman. They may feel like both or have days where itâs more one then the other. Itâs a spectrum and they will always be the best oneâs to explain where on the spectrum they feel they fall. They/them pronouns are easy, just imagine talking about an unknown person. âThey left their wallet.â
Making them feel safe and heard is going to be the most important.
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Isnât that were you do not identify with either gender? Like your basically neutral I think. Honestly Iâd join a Facebook group, there is a lot that are specifically for parents/guardians or family of someone who has come out and may need some extra support on being supportive. Shoot at 13 she probably needs to reSch out to support groups too, my big concern is how cruel the world is. Saying the wrong thing seems easier than saying the right thing
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Means she needs help. There are only two genders.
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Thats just some bs, what is so trendy with the libtards and poisoning kids with that crap.
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Typically it means sheâs (they?) neither male nor female. Maybe ask them for more clarification? Theyâll appreciate the effort! Also maybe ask for their pronouns? Some nb people are ok with using their assigned pronouns. Some arenât. Youâre an AMAZING grandma for trying to better understand! Much love to you and your grandchild
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Wow some really nasty moms on here
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Go up to them and say- âgrannyâs old darling, can you explain what that means? Oh really? Thatâs nice. Fancy a sandwich? Hug?â
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The way I understand it is they donât associate with male nor female norms⌠they had an SNL skit back in the day, with an Androgynous person named pat! They werenât male nor female⌠the person just lived life however
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Whomever is laughing at this post⌠Ya mama a h*o
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Iâd put her in therapy. Not because of what she feels or thinks, but because therapist can help her cope and understand these feelings. As well as help her deal with the cruelty sheâll receive from
the world for being any kind of different.
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Them/they is what they want to be called. Not she or her or daughter or granddaughter
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Teach her not get so caught up in what people think of her choices. The only thing that matters is that they make sense to her. She will not gain everyones approval but she doesnât need to either. Not a mother yet but I want my kid to be real about the world. I wonât sugar coat anything for her. I donât believe in the non binary thing myself but not everyone believes in God so who am I to judge. To each their own beliefs. You can still love your child while you disagree on stuff. Let her be who she wants to be.
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Okay but this is a moms group not a hate group. If you have anything negative or unhelpful donât comment.
Just ask her to explain what sheâs feeling and how she identifies to you more, listen and adjust accordingly! Youâre doing great!
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Honestly itâs just a new thing everyoneâs non-binary nowadays. Sheâll probably move on. Just respect it until she does
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With all this no gender crap what do you expect. Not trying to be negative but it seems like people are pushing the young to be like this. I say just let them be kids
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It means she doesnât identify as Male or female. Ask what her pronouns are. They will either be she/her he/him or they/them
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I would encourage explaining to her that she doesnât have to feel feminine to be a female.
This idea that a gender is supposed to feel a certain way to be that gender is crazy. Lots and Lots of women are not prissy/girly type women.
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Join the group Raising Children UnFundamentalist You will receive support and no judgement or any unkind comments. 
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They feel they do not fall within the binary boxes of being male or female, and they are someone who exists outside of that 
As others said, best to just ask your grandchild how the PERSONALLY feel about gender and about how that reflects on themselves.
If they want she/her pronouns, great. If they want they/them, also great. ask and respect the pronouns requested.
Also may be good to ask if thereâs another name theyâd be more comfortable being called thatâs more gender neutral!
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That means sheâs been on social media to much.
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I bet she learned it from tik tok. When I was 13 I had no clue about any of the stuff our kids do. Itâs sad
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How yâall gonna get mad at others in a group called âinappropriate and unfiltered mommaâ lol
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It means they donât identify as male or female
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Sometimes just asking them what pronouns they would like you to use can help. Non-binary means they donât feel like their either gender. Just trying to figure it out and not rejecting your child is an excellent step in the right direction.
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Binary means two - non binary is when they neither identify as female or male. Pronouns used are they/them. Good for them for feeling confident enough to make it known! I would support them! Access any LGBTQ organization for information or support. A lot of them also identify as Queer. 
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Ask them to find some good articles or informative websites they can share with you so you can both learn & understand together! If youâre willing to learn with them they will likely feel accepted
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What it means is she doesnât define with either sex. Most likely prefers to be referred to as they or them. Thanks for supporting her. Iâm so upset seeing som me of these comments and reacts.
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First - ask pronouns. Non-binary people tend to use they/them. Second - try to use those pronouns, ask if they are comfortable with their birth name or if they would rather be called by a different name. Use whatever name they wish.
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Look up Google, it explains everything nowadays. Are you asking for her or are you just trying to draw attention on yourself?
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Non-binary just means they want to be loved for who they are regardless of social norms. A 13 year old is still young in my opinion and she just may not see herself in any particular gender role.
Smh⌠not sure why this is the âtrendyâ thing to say from young people.
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Non binary is gender neutral⌠so they donât want to be referred to as she/her/daughter etc but they/them.
And to all the nasty pasties. Answer the question or scroll on. You werenât asked your opinion, you were asked what it means so this poster can best support her grandchild
Natalie Clothier do you have any other insight to help this lady on how she can understand and support her grandchild
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On the new atf form its there means they claim no gender
Kids are so confused these days.
unhappy and confused seems to be the norm. Hope she is genuinely happy Love is Love
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She is still your 13-year-old Grandchild and just to know that you love and support. Set down and have a talk have her/him explain!
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Good for you,sounds like you really care about her feelings and want to support her
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Itâs a phase. Itâs " cool" to say this. She will most likely move on from this as ppl will eventually move on from dying their hair pink and purple.
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