Here's some background before getting into the situation. My mom within the last several years has been all about her family.(her parents & sister)Now let me remind you that while only living 25 minutes away the never really came to visit us. Well I ended up moving with my husband closer to them and then later on having a baby and they still rarely ever came to visit. They decided they were going to move 3 hours north of us.(both my Grandparents and Aunt/Uncle, Cousins)Well now that they live so far we barely see each other. Which I do have 3 children(9,5,2) so it's harder for me to just take off and drive up there. I do make a point to go up there every summer with the kids and spend several night/days. Anyways for Thanksgiving my mom wants us to go up there to spend time with them. Which I completely understand that she wants us to get together for Thanksgiving on Thanksgiving day, but my husband and I work the day before. I don't feel like making my children sit in a car for 3 hours and then have to go to bed. Plus Black Friday is my day to shop and I will not put the kids in the car with everything I buy. I then offered that maybe I can come up for the weekend. I just honestly don't feel like going. Every time I try to talk to my mom about it she get all defensive and upset. I also just think back to them never reaching out to see how the kids are doing or anything like that. I've reached out several times and it just didn't make a difference. Plus they want us to come out 3 weeks later for a surprise birthday party. I could add so much more about certain things in the past but just wanted to give you some details. What would you do? Suck it up and take your kids up there or just stay home and do your own family thing?
Normally I would say try and just get through it but the fact that they don’t contact you much anyways is what makes me say don’t go. it’s exhausting and frustrating when you’re the only one making an effort. Plus you both work before hand, and you shop Black Friday. So if you do go, it’s a 3 hour drive after getting off work. Or waking up thanksgiving day, driving 3 hours, spending a few hours there, then driving 3 hours back so you can go shopping the next day. Then to make another trip a couple weeks later is a lot. She should’ve taken advanced when you lived a lot closer. So, that’s my opinion. Enjoy the day with your husband and kids, have the kids help you make the food, find a funny good movie to watch that night with all of you, or do thanksgiving activities like paining for coloring pictures.