This is going to be long. So I am married but been separated for almost 6 yrs and going through a divorce for 3. I have been with my current boyfriend off and on for the last 4 years. When we first started dating he seemed like this amazing father had a good job and was stable. He lived with his parents because he had split from his ex. We only dated for 2 months and he just ghosted me and went back to his ex because she wouldn’t let him see their son if he was with someone else. Then I started dating someone who I got along with great and our children got along great as well. But he ended also trying to work things out with his ex. So then a couple months later the first guy I was with reached out and we dated again for about 8 months before he met my children then a couple months later he moved in with us. I have had to deal with a ton of drama from his ex, his own son and him talking to multiple woman behind my back. His son a couple yrs in did some very inappropriate things in front of one of my children and caused a lot of stuff in my divorce so I broke it off with him as soon as my child told me. His son is VERY disrespectful to everyone, a bully and other things. His son needs help he needs counseling bad but he doesn’t do anything! 4 months later he was begging for me back and understood his son could not be around well then we ended up getting back together and pregnant and 4 months into my pregnancy it was horrible so I kicked him out again he put me through so much bs and stress during my pregnancy ignoring me for hours or days, talking to other women again and they didn’t even know he had a baby on the way the delivery was absolutely horrible with him there , so when our son was 2 weeks old I told him there was no working this out and made him leave.
Well then the 2nd guy I dated the good one his daughter wanted to meet my baby so they came over and a few weeks later we ended up back together and everything was amazing and he helped out so much and treat my baby and all my other kids (I have 5 total) as his own. We did everything as a team we never argued we always talked about things did family stuff. It was perfect everything I have ever wanted in a relationship.Well me being dumb let the other guy (baby daddy) get in my head about us working out cuz of our baby and I took him back. He hasn’t talked to other woman that I know of but had lied to me about drugs and being on his way home from a bar but stayed for 6 hours doesn’t help out much hasn’t seen his other son in 7 months now and I have NO clue why I still love this man and why I can’t let go when I have the perfect man waiting and wanting me and my children back. Why can’t I let the one that has done me so wrong go? And him knowing I do not want to be around his son and his son can not be around my children because he is a bully and did some very bad things around my children he still wants to be here??? I could never be with someone that had a grudge on my child and didn’t want them around. I just don’t see this working out in the long run. He says children aren’t around forever well yeah they are. I know I sound dumb for even having a little love for him but I just do not understand why I do. I want to leave him for good this time because of everything but I don’t know why it’s so hard to. And I know to everyone it’s going to be cut and dry just leave. What the hell am I holding on to with him?? I know if I’m with him my baby won’t be around his son. But also if I leave him he may not see the baby much at all like the first 4 months of his life just like what he’s doing to his other son now.
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You need to love your kids and baby more than him. He’s not good for you, which means he’s not good for your kids. He has disrespected you multiple times, no woman should ever stand for that. You’re worth more than that. One day you’ll look back, see where your life is at & wish you had stayed with the good guy. The fact that you have 5 kids & he’s still interested, says it all.
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