We started having our grand daughter stay overnight when she was about 4 months. She is coming tomorrow for the weekend. She is 27 now
All grandparents aren’t like they used to be. My kids don’t stay the night or hang out with their grandparents without their dad or I there. It’s weird to me
wow I wish I had this “problem”.
Why can’t you guys all spend the night
You shouldn’t force a child to stay anywhere they don’t want to. Maybe if she spent more time with them on a regular basis, they would want to stay over night. She should want to spend as much time as possible with them without unnecessary boundaries. My grandkids always want to be at Mimi and Pappy’s cause from day one we made the effort to create that bond. They’ll stay for a month in the summer. If they choose not to stay the night we don’t punish them for it by spending less time with them. That’s obsurd and controlling.
I don’t think it’s an issue to stay over at grandma and grandpas house as long as the kid is in their own bed. I do not condone sleeping with grandparents
Is it like a driving thing do they think it would be easier if they did the activity then just let them sleep over like maybe they had a lot of treats during visit and grandparents r thinking why should parents deal with what we created
Do what you feel you are comfortable with and what your child is comfortable with. If you and baby aren’t ready for sleepovers, don’t do them. Period. Maybe when ur child gets a little older they will want to do sleepovers with grandma, u never know. But don’t ever make urself or ur child uncomfortable just to make someone else more comfortable. That’s just not healthy. My mom and dad see my kids all the time, take them for sleepovers, or take them for the day visits too …not sure why day visits is such an issue for your MIL but people just have their own preferences. Your not always going to see eye to eye, but bottom line is that is YOUR child, and YOU do not have to do anything that makes either of u uncomfortable.
Did you spend the night with your grandparents? Remember the memories you made? I WISH my MIL reached out and wanted my kids Hell they don’t even get a happy birthday anymore🤷♀️. I hope to be the grandma who has my grand babies all the time to give thier parents breaks.
A bond has to be built and nurtured. If you’re unwilling to let that happen then don’t complain when they’re closer to their other Grandchildren than they are your children… overnights at Grandparents are special bonding times that your kids are missing out on
Sleepovers are uncomfortable to me. I want my kids home. But I still let them if their grandparents ask or if the kids do
If the kids want to spend the night then by all means, let them. However I’m right there with you on not FORCING them to spend the night. My oldest stays with her grandma every chance she gets and has since she was about 18 months old. My youngest however is 15 months and I don’t see her being ready to stay away anytime soon. It is what it is. She can go when she’s ready. God knows Im ready for the break but I’m not gonna sacrifice her feelings for my own.
I wish that was my problem…can I adopt an overnight granny?
Imagine being weirded out that a grandparent wanted to be involved. I fucking wish dude. You got it pretty easy it sounds like.
I feel like you might be leaving important information out here. Is the relationship between you and her good and if it isn’t perhaps it’s affecting her relationship with the grandchildren.
I just don’t like it - when Grandparents - don’t treat the Grandkids - with equal time
Unless they give you a reason to think the kids should not spend the night there or the kids protest then why not let them? That sounds awesome for everyone
Having a grandparent to take the children overnight is a blessing.  The grandparent gets to put them to sleep and see them when they wake. Quality time is the best time. The more people that love a child the better. They become a more well-rounded human. If your three-year-old isn’t ready she’s just not ready. But, if she decides to go, please let her. You may get a call around 10 or so to come pick her up. I have seen that happen. My granddaughter who is 13 still does that to her mother when she spends the night with one of her friends. We just laugh, and go get her. Some kids are homebodies and some kids are adventures. Enjoy
I can say I try to take my grandkids when I can or allowed to
I spent the night at my grandparents house
I can tell you some my best memories are with them in their house
I miss them very much
My kids would go stay with their grandma and great aunts house
You know what they loved and miss them very much my mom and aunts are gone
It’s not weird
Be happy for it
Its normal for kids to stay with their grandparents. Your the weird one not allowing it.
Stop being an asswipe and let the grandpa have the grandkids overnight. It’s memories that they’ll have after your mil and fil are no longer here
It’s because there’s more bonding time
How you may ask…a simple visit or outing consists of:
Getting kids ready
Travel to destination
Welcoming excitement
Cool down period
Bonding time
Getting kids ready
Goodbye excitement
Travel
So out of a full day “visit” in-between all that PLUS meals and probably naps there is very little actual time spent bonding
Overnight visits act as 2 visits in 1 and eliminate a couple steps such as some travel, some welcome excitement, some cool down periods, and a whole session of goodbye excitement
Maybe she is sensing that you’re not compmfortable sending them overnight, so she is self conscious, doesn’t want to interfere. Also if the other grandkids are her daughter’s kids , as opposed to in your case, its her son’s kids, so you are the Mom, and she doesnt feel like its her place, or isnt as comfortable reaching out more. My ex mother in law told me this once.
You are something else. Let those kids stay the night with their grandparents. What a control freak!
I wish my kids had grandparents that they could have sleepovers with. None of theirs were trustworthy or made much effort or like in my grandma’s case she loves to but she’s a little older and it can be rough to have 3 rambunctious girls all at once. They have to miss out on something wonderful because my parents and their dad’s parents were all just trash. Let them stay the night. It gives them time to bond with GMA and give you time to bond with your partner. And believe me that is also something to not take for granted.
Because this is normal grankids have always stayed the nignt with granparents etc grankids spending quality time during day and over nignt helps builds memories and a strong relationship between granparents and gran kids… didn’t you ever stay with your gran parents growing up? Or have some of your best memories with your gran parents I have some of the most amazing memories with mine and I treasure those moments . The excitement of packing a bag to go to nanny and grandads after school and going on day trips with nanny and grandad those are some memoirs your kids will never forget…
Some people’s granparents don’t give a crap so be pleased your parents/parent want to be part of your family and kids lifes and take it with open arms…
Confused on what you’re complaining about.
Um, I would welcome ANY AND ALL BREAKS! Matter of fact, my 10 year old can go with her!!!
Don’t be so selfish there probably thinking there giving you a break
My kids spent one sometimes two weekends a month at my parents house when they were little all the way up till they became adults actually that’s how good the relationship became between my children and their grandparents… I looked at it as a chance to be an adult and do adult things because my children were perfectly safe and hanging out and spending the night and time with the grands. And now I’m a grandma and at least once or twice a month I snatch my grandbabies up for the weekend , do you know how much it cost to get a babysitter these days ? for a date night or just some adult time in general? My kids personally are grateful for the opportunity to just breathe and not have to worry about their kids or having to pay a sitter for a few hours when I’ll take them and they can have the whole day and night , sometimes even the whole weekend. I do it because I remember what it was like being a parent ,24/7 kids etc etc. And how nice it was when my parents would give me that one weekend or one day/night etc. To just not have to be responsible for anyone or anything but myself , sometimes we just took the opportunity to sleep and veg out in front of the TV , other times we took the opportunity to go out spend time focusing on each other , adulting is hard and adulting with kids is even harder you got no free time for yourself, so grandparents offering to take the children? and I ain’t got to pay a babysitter? That was golden in my younger days as a parent , and I thank my parents every day for that and it’s exactly why I offer the same to my adult children now.
I am a grandma …the parent set the tone . i support my kids in whatever their decision is. She is missing out on precious moments. So maney in my generation are so self absorbed this is so sad.
I remember staying with my grandma and grandpa ,loved doing that we had so much fun
Least you have that support and at least she invites! You could talk to her about it plan occasions but not sleep over maybe she doesn’t call allot because she is swallowing her pride and kind of knows already how you feel.
Staying the night with my grandparents growing up gave me some of the best childhood memories. My oldest used to stay at my parents house growing up. He is now 20. My youngest son who is 8 and he doesn’t want to have sleepovers with anyone. I don’t force it either and he has a wonderful relationship with my parents but during daytime hours. Lol!
I spent most weekends with my grandparents as a kid. I also spent a lot of my school breaks and summers with them. I absolutely loved it. My nana was my best friend.
I would nurture that relationship…. It’s special. Let them have their sleepovers! My kids have no living grandparents or great grandparents so it’s something they’ll never get to experience.
Let your kids have those memories!
Michael Rathka Jr. Sounds like your mom
We are opposite. No more overnights except for emergencies.
There is something special between grandparents and grandchildren from what I’ve heard. If you’re child isn’t ready then of course don’t force them but if they’re as close to grandparents then let them sleep over and enjoy the night free and take some time for yourself
I have 2 grandchildren and they both have sleepovers with me. My grandson who’s 5 does a lot more than my granddaughter who is 2. They love staying with nana and I’m so glad my kids let me spend as much time as I want with the babies.
I’d love when my grand children spend the weekend and nights with me. It gives a grandparent a close bond to the children.
It feels so good when they are snuggled up to you and you’re reading to them or watching a movie or eating popcorn . My granddaughter will be 12 next month and my grandson will be six in February and if I could get them every weekend I would.A grandmothers bond with her grandchildren can never be broken. It’s a total different love that you have for them.
What’s the problem with them spending the night? Is it because it’s not your side of the family? I loved spending the night at my grand parents house & I love having my grand children spend the night
My MIL has a toddler (my sons uncle) 2 years younger than my son. He stays with her frequently as well as he does with. Us. My 4 month old I won’t let stay anywhere yet bc he’s to little!
You said no your child isn’t ready so she should respect that. But you should also ask yourself if you’re being a little too much of a momma bear and not wanting to let them go overnight. Which I fully understand. Maybe she thinks you don’t trust her and that’s why she doesn’t reach out. I would just sit down and tell her how you’re feeling. Not going to get anywhere without being open and honest about everyone’s feelings.
maybe cuz our grandparents kept us overnights
I would love if my parents were involved like that with my kids,hell with me but I trust nobody with my kids(for good reason) so sleepovers don’t happen.
one on one time with the kids doesn’t compare with an afternoon outing. I am a great great grandma and wouldn’t trade those sleep overs for anything. It’s a bonding thing that now as adults we laugh and share memories
we other
I just wonder if you would feel the same if it was your mother instead of your MIL?
If she feels like you don’t like her or the kids don’t love her she will spend more time with the people and kids she feels do, it’s human nature and it’s up to you as parents to teach your child to love their granny it don’t always come naturally x
Honestly she needs to respect your not comfortable with it and your answer is no. If/when you are comfortable with it, you’ll let her know. At this point her being so pushy about it and using your kids not spending the night as a reason she doesn’t contact them more is gross.
My children are able to spend 4/7 nights with their grandparents, then their great grandparents have them 2 weeks and 5 weeks over school holidays.