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QUESTION:
"It was completely unexpected and out of the left field. He just started packing his belongings and left. A little background, a few weeks ago we were drinking at his friend’s house and we got home and he was completely hammered. He said a few unkind words and I was pretty torn up about it. I told him the next day and he felt so bad he cried…he told me before he left he couldn’t forgive himself for what he did and it was having a major impact on him. His friend came and helped him move some of his belongings and he was gone. He blocked me on Facebook but wrote me on his friend's account apologizing, saying how he was a f*** up, how he would never forgive himself and I wouldn’t forgive him, how I deserve better than him… I’ve since then talked to his friend who said he is hurting very bad."
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"First why would you want him back? Secondly, it sounds like there is more to the story and he is using that as an excuse to leave."
"Hey, I understand wanting him to come back. But him being messed up and lashing out like he did is so wrong. I know you really want him to come back but you deserve so much better"
"He has a lot of problems he needs to work on. He totally made himself the victim. Which he may be a victim of a mental health issue, but he’s not the victim of THIS issue. Honestly if he wants to come back it best be with a therapist, and a butt load of healing under his belt. That’s not as common as it should be though so don’t hold your breath."
"Him leaving so quickly over a drunken mistake is super weird…my husband has had these moments many times but never wanted to just up and leave, he immediately changed his behavior instead and made sure we didn’t end up in that situation again…I think there’s more to the story sister and I’m sorry"
"He's for sure cheating why not just unblock you from HIS OWN fb and message you… That's right cause there are things he doesn’t want you to see. But he also wants to keep you on a string in case it doesn’t work out with the new supply so he can come crawling right back to you. MOVE ON AND NEVER LOOK BACK!"
"He’s definitely seeing someone else… Went through that same exact situation… Turns out my “gut feeling” was right. He’s found his “greener grass.” Remember a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts."
"This just sounds like the proverbial straw. He’s done something else to you and is using this as an excuse to leave. Don’t trust him. Let him be. Move on. He’s hiding something for sure."
"He’s a narcissist! Stay away from him. The behavior sounds like a covert narcissist and he’s trying to make himself the victim. I guarantee he’s cheating and already had a new supply in place. The friend being involved is ridiculous and immature."
"He’s cheated and this is his way out unscathed. Let him move out and move on."
"Here’s the question. Why would you want to be with a man that could so easily and suddenly leave you without a real explanation? Forget about what he wants. That’s irrelevant. The fact is that you deserve better. Take some time to heal and go find yourself a real man. Someone who will show you the kind of respect you deserve."
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