Would it be rude to tell my parents I do not want to celebrate Christmas with them?

My parents have always been very present in my kids lives and we’ve always celebrated Christmas with them Now we’ve moved a few hours away so they can’t just stop by Would it be rude or harsh to tell them that I’d rather celebrate Christmas with them another day and have Christmas with just my little family on the day of?


How about you have Christmas with just your little family a different day? It’s a win win. You won’t break your moms heart. And you get your own little family Christmas too.


No. My grandparents used to celebrate Christmas with us the week before and we’d get a small present to open. The day itself was then just my brother, myself and our parents.


All I have to say , your parents are not young anymore, you only have one mother and one father,. You never know when they won’t be around anymore, it may break there hearts , and cause hurt feeling if it’s something you have always done , their are too many people in this world , that only care about their own feelings, as parents get older, and kids move away they feel less , and less needed, sad, and lonely. I sure alot of parents would never say they were hurt , or sad, but they will probably sit and cry Christmas day when they are alone. Is it all worth it to change now , if so go for it.


One thing I’ve discovered since having my kids is that THEY come first in literally everything and that my world revolves around them - not others. . .
I don’t care about upsetting grown adults anymore - I do what’s best for my children.
We have our own little family traditions and this means breaking other traditions that do not benefit my kids :woman_shrugging:
Christmas is for my children and if I have to upset a few adults to make sure that my kids have the most amazing Christmas day then so be it.
Do what YOU and your little family want to do. They come first x


As a grandparent who spent alot of time with kids and they live several hours away. The last several years we went on christmas morning and then came home. This year we will be celebrating on a different day and I am fine with that I think in these days children are the priority and they want to stay home on the holiday and they do have family there as well so its to much in one day. I am fine with a separate day that we can spend quality time together.


How about we make it about the family celebration and not focusing so much on the actual date. Now that Im a grandparent. We are changing things a little. I do not expect my grown kids with their own kids to make their Christmas all about traveling from one house to another. We will plan a dinner around that holiday and then I get their full attention for the whole day.


No, they may actual welcome that you can spend more time on a different day. Just be honest and involve them in the choosing of their day


I could never leave my parents alone on Christmas. But to each their own


We do Christmas Eve with my family and do Christmas Day at our house with our kiddos! We do the gifts we got the other kids and adults that night and have a big dinner. But if that’s too hard with the drive I don’t see anything wrong with skipping!


My family has always got together on Christmas Eve in the evening and Christmas days always been a lazy home day :sweat_smile: unfortunately I work this Christmas Eve so it’ll be the first one I miss so we are going Christmas day but it won’t be the whole family

Our family does the get-together on Christmas Eve, so we can stay home day of.


No not at all. Since getting our home 6 hours.away from his parents.they have always except a couple of years had them stay at our place meaning they were here for everything at Christmas. The last couple of years they can no longer stay as we just do not have the room anymore ( we have 4 kids in a 3 bedroom home) so they have been staying at the local Inn. I have always wanted some time for us to have as our own family being my partner and just our kids. Maybe will get it this year as there was a recent argument between us and his mother over something that she blew up about which was a innocent mistake which she needs to apologise for what she said about myself, my side of the family and her only 4 grandchildren (which really upset the kids as they heard what she said). Hope everything goes well for you and it would make it that you can all relax and enjoy things more. Merry Christmas.

Xmas is a time to get together with those u love :heart: so if they can come and enjoy it with u let them do it

We do Christmas Eve at my parents and we stay home for day of.

christmas, holidays, regular days, any day should be spent with those you want to be with at that time. If you want to do something different, nothing is wrong with that. just do it.

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Yes it would be rude you only a mom an dad spent all the time you can with them because when they are gone you will wish you have of took time to be with them .

Your parents had 18+ years of Christmases with you. They will understand, just like their parents did and theirs before them. It’s a part of life for most people.

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Remember they committed to you …when you needed them…now they need you and the company of your children more especially.

You have a choice and they made a choice not to leave you in an orphanage or totally abandone you (sounds harsh) heh!

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No. I told everyone when I first moved into my house that for the first year in my own house I’m staying home and celebrating holidays with my family. There is nothing rude about it and ignore anyone that says otherwise.

It’s your family. Start your own traditions.

You have the rest of your life to celebrate with your kids. Your parents arent going to be here for that length.

You can do what you want but don’t wait to the last min to tell her .

No it’s not rude just say and arrange another day with them x

maybe christmas eve with them and c day with your family

I think it depends on what kind of memories you want to create. We flew early morning every Christmas from Denver to Minneapolis to spend Christmas with my family. It was a holiday tradition my children cherish to this day. We spent Christmas Eve with just us, and Christmas Day with our whole family. It’s a memory they will never forget. It’s a memory I am trying to create for my grandchildren now. If your kids are in school, you have a lot of days to create memories with just your immediate family, but Christmas should be special with special memories. I would think especially now that they are a couple of hours away and you probably won’t see them near as often, Christmas day should be spent with them. But you also don’t want to have them over for the holiday, and then have animosity between you because it’s not what you want. In the end it depends on what you’re looking for in the holiday. Good luck.

We just had Christmas with my daughter and her family on the 11th of December. Due to work schedules that’s what worked for all of us. We will have our family Christmas at my mom’s Christmas Eve. Then everyone will have Christmas day at their own homes with their own family and traditions.
Things change as families grow. Grown children want to have their own special traditions with their kids. As a grandma I get that and do my best to accommodate that.


For the past few years we have had early lunch with my mum and driven five hours to have dinner with my husbands parents. It’s not about us and it’s showing our son that family is very important and we can have our little celebrations at other times…

No, it’s not rude. As long as their told respectfully, then your good. How they react is on them.

We did this alot when the kids were young. It’s not much of a holiday when your not enjoying it.

Not rude. Just be honest with them.

I would not want to hurt their feelings.