Would you be okay with your man talking to a female friend all the time?

Can your man have a female friend(coworker) that he talks to daily, not just work? I have insecurities due to being cheated on previously, so I have my guard up, but apparently, she asked him if "I know about them talking a lot? not quite sure how to take that. I want so bad to be ok with them because he seems to like her for a friend, but i can’t seem to let myself be ok with it…

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Absolutely. Relationships are about trust. Also i work in the trades so all my coworkers are male and my boss is my best friend. We all hang out together on weekends, his wife and my bf … We go on trips together. And i talk to him all the time. You just need trust.

Personally I would not be ok with it. Yes I’d be fine with him having a female friend at work but there is no reason for them to communicate other than when at work. I went through this. They said that they were only friends. Fast forward a few months and he left walked away from our 19 year relationship and our two girls.
They bought a house together and have now been together for three years and he barley even sees his daughters anymore.

There is 2 ways you can look at it. Either you can be okay with it, get to know her and be friends with her as well, or you can be suspicious and ruin what yall have. It’s up to you. Being open and honest about how you feel is always the best route. I hope it’s nothing serious and you can work through this and have the trust that is needed for a strong relationship but you can’t blame or put that burden on him because of someone else’s mistake. There are good men out there.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Would you be okay with your man talking to a female friend all the time? - Mamas Uncut

It completely depends on the female

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If he hasn’t given you a reason to not trust him then it’s a you issue not a him issue.

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Yes. Hubby has female friends. I am friends with 2 guys I work with. I like their wives too. We do have many common interests outside work: music, games, books. You know your man can have sex with another man just as easily as another woman.

Well, it depends. My best friends were always guys. But, if you as a partner are voicing reservations, then your partner needs to take action.

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Kind of a red flag for her to ask if you know that they talk all the time. If she has bad intentions than he doesn’t need to be her friend.

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No way.let him talk to men & swhe women.

Honestly if there not flirting and are just friends I wouldn’t see a problem with it… I have guy work friends same with hubby has work female friends and has never been an issue for us in our relationship at all.

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It’s a NO for me! They see each other at work daily so what else is there to talk about afterwards… That’s cutting into time he should be talking to you!

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If she’s asking that it’s because even she can’t believe he’s able to get so close to her. All I know is as a married person you shouldn’t be “hanging out” with any other person everyday and building a bond with them. My husband barely has enough time to give his family so I don’t see why he’d spend extra time with another female without us. :woman_shrugging:

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Nope last time he mentioned friends at work and I allowed him to hang out he ended up moving that “co worker” in with his mothers apt after knowing her for only 2 months :joy:

Yes we are both adults and don’t get to decide who the other person is friends with

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Me and my boyfriend have been together 6 years and our best friends are of the opposite sex, its ok as long as boundaries are not crossed. Not saying you should become besties with her as well but I would be close enough to be comfortable around her

The way she asked if you know they talk could go in the route of her not wanting to overstep or her wanting to scope out how your dynamic is… like how y’all communicate etc…

I personally would voice my insecurities to my man and maybe y’all can plan something to all get together and hang out then you may not be so insecure about their friendship and you may even gain a friend :woman_shrugging:t3:

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& also why don’t you hang out with them? Have they never asked? Seems fishy off the spot tbh

Yeah my husband talks to female friends he knows from work even if he doesn’t work with them anymore or on days he doesn’t see them. It doesn’t bother me.

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Lol. Bunch’s of insecure women

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Honestly, if that’s what she said it could be that she wants to be sure that you’re okay with them being friends. My best friend is a guy (and an ex but we weren’t together very long) and that’s usually the first thing that we tell people that we are dating. He tells them that his best friend is a girl and an ex and I do the same when I’m seeing a new guy. It, honestly, doesn’t bother me. My boyfriend has female friends and I’ve got no issue with it.

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Nope, I’m wasn’t born yesterday I know how it goes

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I have guy friends who I call my brothers that I speak to alot and go hang out with without my husband. He doesn’t care because he trusts me.

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Yes they can talk be friends but include you too

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100% I am okay with it. All that I ask is I know who he is talking to. I am not his Mother and if you aren’t confident enough in your relationship then you really shouldn’t be in it .

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Cause she knows as a woman if it was her she’d have a problem

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He doesn’t need to talk to a female friend EVERY DAY!!

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Probably trying to get a leg over​:+1::grin::smiley::grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

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If it bothers you… it should bother him. All marriages have different perspectives. Not one size fits all.

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Lmaoooo my best friend has a gf that he lives with and where he works he told me he has a couple “friends” if you know what I mean. And I knew plenty more like that and they were married. Honestly listen to your gut and don’t put anything past anyone , learned the hard way

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I don’t have a problem with my husband talking to other women that he works with or is around I trust him he knows he’s married. And if the woman oversteps he puts her in her place

I’m an engaged 43 yr old woman. My fiance was cheated on in his previous marriage. ALL of my friends are male. He is just fine with me talking every single day to at least 1 of them because I tell him and include him in the conversations. He knows I love only him.

Yes. If there isn’t trust in the relationship than there is no relationship. The sex of the friend should not matter.

If he’s ok with you having male friends

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Ultimately. Trust your gut and pay attention.

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I feel like a grown man shouldn’t have time to entertain constant conversations with another women he sees no future with

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Depends on the man mostly. But relationships w other person can quickly escalate.your spouse should respect how you feel and do what you need .

My husband’s best friend( best man at our wedding) and he calls my phone instead of my husband’s; probably because mine is 1st in contacts but a lot of times l talk to him without the husband being around. He’s like a brother to me.

I am divorcing a man that spoke with other woman behind my back.
It lead up to more things than just talking on the phone!

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That depends. I’m okay with some women and not others. My husband has several female friends (including 2 exes) and I don’t have a problem with them. I’m unusually good at being able to tell if someone has bad intentions

Depends. I think if she truly is only a friend and knows he’s in a relationship, she’s gonna make an effort to include you and make sure you know she isn’t a threat. Does he talk freely when he’s on the phone with her? Or does he go to another room? Are they hanging out or is just phone calls? The best way to resolve it is talk to him or even both of them.

I totally understand we’re the insecurities come from but don’t forget this isn’t the person that cheated on you if your gonna be in a relationship you gotta learn to trust each other otherwise there’s no point in being together maybe suggest that you meet the girl in person to put your mind at ease with there friendship she may have asked about you knowing about them talking because she may not want you to feel how your feeling right now not every girl is gonna cheat with your man and not every boyfriend will be like the cheater

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I dont care who my husband talks to since I trust HIM!

So I guess I’m the odd one out because I have friends that are men but we are just friends there is nothing sexual or romantic about those relationships. Just friends, maybe you should get to know the coworker.

Talking constantly? No. That would make me suspicious. And in my experience, rightly so.

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Males and females can be just friends. I’m not sure why some can’t comprehend that. I can’t stand to be around anyone that doesn’t understand that. He can be just friends with her. You’re bringing you’re insecurities in the picture and the fact you don’t hide that says you know you’re doing it so I’m proud of you for admitting that. Not many do but it’s very respectable when one does. Talk to him about it but don’t try to control him at any point. If you like her and want to be friends with her to then okay but if you don’t then okay. You can be friends with anyone, male and female.

There is always trust and boundaries.
All the time like good morning and good night and what are you up to everyday is to much. Like I’ll chat with my male coworkers and joke around if I see something they’ll think is funny I’ll send it to them or if someone saidvsomethingnto share…or plans with the group . But no back back forth.
If you’ve asked him to stop and he isn’t that’s a sign.

Trust. Gut feelings, call it woman’s intuition… If either of those are compromised, something else is going on.

First and for most you should be his best friend. Anyone else comes after you.
Does he talk and text with you as much as he does her? If not then that’s a red flag.
Do they hang out outside of work without you? Do they have lunch at work together every day? It’s very very rare that a man and a women can be really good friends and there not be other feelings involved.

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Yes. I’m fine with it because I have make friends and if he wants to cheat. He will but he knows what will happen if he does. I won’t even make a fuss. I will just pack up and leave.

Get u a guy friend / coworker and talk with him. See how your man likes those apples :apple: bet he changes up real quick :100:

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If she’s only a co worker they don’t need to communicate outside work. If they were friends already before co workers, no big deal but if it’s just a female he works with, no it’s not ok. It’s disrespectful to you and he shouldn’t be entertaining conversations with her. Been through something similar, partner has a different opinion because she’s “one of the boys” but her reactions have shown that she’s one who doesn’t care if his partner is unhappy about it. And no I’m not happy about his opinion either, bit of a sore subject :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Talking constantly? Na.

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if she’s asking that means she wants you to be okay with the fact that they’re friends. I have guy friends and my bf has female friends. She’s asking out of respect not sneakiness

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People of the opposite gender can indeed be friends without f*cking… I do understand your insecurities tho, been there, done that, unfortunately :pleading_face:

My boyfriend has alot of female friends and everyone of them that gave him a chance slept with him good luck

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I had a “friend” that seemed cool and would hang out with just my boyfriend… until the one time they “accidentally” kissed and other things. She always had intentions of doing so as she told me after when I asked her she would do that to me. Since my boyfriend has a twin that looks just like him and is single I know damn well she just wanted what she couldn’t have. Best of luck to you.

I feel like she has been more considerate about your feelings then he has. My guy has a lot of women friends most he served with. I know where I stand in my life so it’s never a concern. Also cheated on in the past but that’s not his problem it’s mine when insecurities come up. Does he make you feel he can’t be trusted?

I mean I can understand if it’s work related but no not just to be talking all the time I definitely wouldn’t be okay with that ask him if he would be okay if it was the other way around ?

Never been through with it? My man too shy talking to females (had work in the past keeps it professional plus have autism) tells everything every time on it like a best friend and full trust on him. But you feel something not right idea him talking to co worker female both at work and outside job site? Time for you have a talk to him let know how strongly feel about it made feel very uncomfortable. Be honest he needs to know how hurt you are about this?

If you think something is going on, something is GOING on !

As far as the opposite sex goes… I’m his friend and vice versa​:woman_shrugging:t4::joy::heart: We enjoy each other’s company…… we are always plotting and scheming for mommy and daddy time lol 15yrs of marriage, 20 years, together and we still like each other…maybe this is a test of your relationship and an opportunity to grow together in understanding and boundaries. If it bothers you then it should bother him​:heart::pray:t5:

I have coworkers I talk to but we strictly talk at work. My husband knows I have male coworkers and he’s even talk to him. But we don’t associate outside of work.

Nope! Occasionally talking one thing ,but alot mmmm people can emotionally cheat and not physically touch.

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Ur gut it’s telling you something :eyes::woman_shrugging:t2:

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Hell no. Too many times they turn out to be not just a friend. Men catch feelings way too easily

Mmm… that’s too intimate. That’s a no for me. Chatting, yes, but this sounds shady.

Yea, If you can’t trust him, you need a new relationship. My husbands beat friend is a female and she’s a close friend of mine too. They talk all the time. Trust is the main key to a relationship. Without trust, you don’t have a relationship

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My fella has female friends, I’m OK with it as I have male friends. No big deal. There’s no romantic feelings so it’s alg.

If u have a mind at all u know the answer is NO any man will jump at the chance and most women will not care about your feelings

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She may have only asked if you knew because she genuinely wanted to be nice, and make sure it was ok. She probably doesn’t want issues, and being accused of anything. Especially if nothing is going on… the issue is not a friendship between a male, and female, but the insecurity in the relationship.

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I’m not, because I’ve been cheated on by one and the phone was his biggest tool. You’ll know when someone wants to be with u. If u feel some type of way ,you better follow your intuitions and realize what’s a red :triangular_flag_on_post:!!

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I talk to mostly m’en much less drama if my bf had issues with that they are his and if that’s too much for him then he knows where the door is :flushed: I won’t change who I am for a man… though he had full access to my phone always and is included in convos he wants… there are ways to make each other feel loved and safe in all relationships

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Why does it always have to be about cheating?!:face_with_symbols_over_mouth: I see all the responses here saying that its cheating and that it’s not ok to be friends with the opposite gender. Yall are stuck on some bs. That’s called being controlling. If there is no disrespect, nobody is crossing boundaries that shouldn’t be crossed, and she is aware of them communicating then nothing is wrong with a man being friends with a female. If he crossed a line or let the other woman cross a line and didnt say something then you should worry.

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Not a chance in hell, if he was a good husband and a decent guy in general he wouldn’t be chatting all day while being in a relationship… nope!! More than friends there, on at least one side of things. Either him or her have feelings.

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Depends on their conversations and behavior. If they’re open with u it’s ok. If they’re being shady then hell no.

That’s something that I’d do though :woman_facepalming:t2: I want to make sure that any male friends partners know I’m talking to them and that it’s not causing tension or problems. Honestly if it’s that much of a problem get them girls number and call her, ask her what her feelings are towards your man

As long as no boundaries are being crossed, I feel like it’s fine. Whatever female friends my hubby has, I’m friends with too. One of them is actually one of my best friends. And vice versa also.

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I have more male friends than female and trust me I want nothing but friendship! Some of my best friends are male.

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It doesn’t bother me. My husband has female friends he talks to every now and then but he doesn’t really have an interest in being friends with other women & he definitely doesn’t hang out with them. Its a respect thing.

I think it’s good to be friend with both. As long as you trust him, past history aside, it should be fine. It took me a LONG time to come to terms with this but we made it through.

Might not be physically cheating but he is emotionally…

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No… Does she have a partner as well? Maybe you can arrange for a double date etc. but that’s not the vibe I’m getting. If they are talking so much that she has to ask if you know about it that seems like a red flag right there. Why wouldn’t he give her your number and suggest you two be friends as you are both women? Seems off

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My husband and I don’t have friends of the opposite sex unless they are friends we had prior to our relationship together in which we had no romantic relationship with. Why? Because regardless of anyone’s intentions, it still leaves an open door. Cheating doesn’t happen over night. It’s a gradual likening to someone that can develop into a romantic relationship. Doesn’t matter if it’s emotional, physical or both. My husband is married to ME and I am the only woman aside from his mother that he dedicates his time to. I have not asked him to do this, he just does. And I am the same way with him. No other men need my time. :woman_shrugging:t2:

I’m usually the friend. I just get along with guys better. I can make fun of them unapologetically, there’s no hurt feelings, no feeling left out. I always try to include the girlfriend (if there is one) on inside jokes, don’t hang out with the guy one on one etc. There are way too many single guys out there to go after a taken one. I understand not every girl thinks this way but I’m just trying to give some perspective. If you feel left out I wouldn’t be cool with that.

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See it as her trying to respect you and your relationship, she’s making sure you know. They’re not hiding it from you. I’ve had friends being weird about their man having opposite sex friends, my point is usually this, I’m bisexual, so does that mean I’m not allowed to have any friends if I’m in a relationship. As long as he’s not neglecting you or blowing you off, I’d be okay. Most of my friends are male, I’m friends with most of my exes. If the friends disrespect you, or try to get in the way or middle of your relationship, then it’s a legitimate issue.

Yes it was ok with me. In the end I leave for other reasons and not infidelity.

Have a sit down convo with him about your insecurities and how him talking another woman frequently is triggering a trauma-related response from you. All it takes are some personal conversations to turn into something more, even if it’s not expected or desired. Be realistic with him

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Yes id let him talk to a female as i talk to males

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My boyfriend has an ex as a friend and an ex fiancé as a friend(sort of). I have no problem with him talking to them. He knows when it comes to ex fiancé i do get irritated because of her not because i dont trust him.

It should not happen. Work is one thing, but being married, he needs to guard his heart. It really isn’t right.

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No he should not. How would he feel if you were talking to another man all day?:thinking:

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Mine has woman friends but he never cheated I think because he’s hurt you you have the right to your feeling insecure. I’d talk to him about it if he doesn’t respect your feelings than there’s there’s something wrong. He doesn’t need to end the friendship but he needs to know how your feeling about it

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Absolutely not period :no_good_woman:t4:

Maybe hang out with her and your spouse together? If she had an issue becoming your friend as well, then I would have issues with it. But if she is fine being your friend as well, why not? You might get that trust to see they are just friends. Not every guy wants to sleep with every female. I do have male friends, and a lot of people I know have opposite sex best friends.

Totally inappropriate

Personally, I wouldn’t be okay with it whatsoever. If it bothers you this much, sit him down and gently talk to him about it. Maybe even show him the message you posted here and wait for his response. Honestly, his response will tell you a whole lot more about who he is and the way he feels about your feelings than anything will.

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At work is different but talking outside of work is a big no no for me

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My fiancé has 3 female best friends. I do not have an issue with it.

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