Mommy’s that have had babies while their significant other was gone, what is your advice? My husband is going to be deployed for nine months, and if there are any tips out there to make this easier, I would really appreciate hearing them. I have been a bawling mess all day.
13 Likes
Are you giving birth after he’s deployed?
I was a military wife for 14 years and I know it doesnt get easy when u know your hubby is leaving your mind works over time and things seem over whelming. But once he is gone u can only take one day at a time. He will call u when he can but try and keep.busy just cause he doesnt call u doesnt mean he doesnt want to.he just cant get to a phone. Find out if there will be a support group on base to keep u informed on things. Best of luck to u my dear you’ll pull thru fine
I thank your husband for his service and you for your support of him. All I could say would be "remember, he is serving his country and as overwhelming as it’s gonna be for you, it will be the same or worse for him. If you can, use Skype, facetime or any other video social media you can, if possible for him. My stepson had to go to Iraq when his new daughter was just a few weeks old. When he got back the child didnt know him (of course) and it was so heartbreaking for them that the baby would scream to go back to mommy. It might help you also to let family members or friends sit with your child so it will not be so 'attached ’ to you and will get familiar with others. God Bless you, good luck.
1 Like
Have some sort of schedule because it’s really easy to get stuck in an endless rut. Have the kids make a countdown of some kind, have videos or recordings for them to watch. Mail lots of packages and get the kids involved in picking things out and decorating the boxes. Join a moms group or whatever local group you like and make sure not to stay stuck in the house all the time.
Also, don’t be too hard on yourself if it gets overwhelming. Cereal is a perfectly acceptable dinner on those nights when things just haven’t gone right.
2 Likes
Yourself time to adjust to being a single parent for that time also when you get to talk to him let him be involved,tell him about the day or plans you have but also let him tell you whatever he wants or can. It will get easier as time goes on. My husband did a year I had two kids at the time and just finished chemo five months before he left.
Before he leaves, have him record himself reading different stories, take loads of pictures if him by himself, with you, with the child and with all of you. Make them into a DVD… several of them.
1 Like
Been there! Find your support system. The military has amazing resources for military spouses and families.
It’s not the same, but we have 4 kids and hubby is gone during the week for work. It used to be 4-6 weeks at a time. The biggest thing is to give yourself grace. Do what you can and leave it at that.
1 Like
Don’t play The Who had it worst game. It’s hard to have a baby without your significant other. If someone can be there for you it helps a lot. I had my son while my SO was deployed. My mom came and helped me and then we went to her house after. Then when I came home I had some friends who helped a lot. We found our grove on our own and while I had days of crying in the freezer cause my baby wouldn’t let me put him down and I needed to put groceries away. But when he got home everything fell into place and we listened to each other’s worst day stories but never tried to one up each other. We acknowledged each other’s struggles. Just do your best to keep things normal in your world. If you feel like you aren’t doing well tho ask for help. Whether it’s a doctor or friend.
I dont have deployed family member but something for me that is really important are the recordable books. For all important family members.
I don’t have advice but I do have gratitude! Not just for your husband but for the sacrifice the family makes as well! Thank you:heart:
Just live life normal. Take care of the house and kids until he comes back.
Tell him the truth before he gets shipped out and he might be able to help you out and be a stand up. I didn’t hear you say anything about you having a affair and I pray the answer will be never hurt 
and I hope he doesn’t get stupid
Tessarose Brown maybe you have advice or can receive some advice. Hugs to you and your little one!!!
If I was there I would give you a big hug! My husband was gone on deployment when our daughter was born and it is tough! I basically had my family around and close friends all of the time. My mom was there at the birth and just kind of took my husbands place during and after the birth. My husband watched the birth through Viber online, but it was slightly irritating to me because he was laying on his bed and evening started eating snacks at one point!
Don’t worry I told him to please stop! Then after she was born I focused all my love and attention on her and just let that fill my heart.
I brought her to the hangar for homecoming and my husband finally got to meet her for he first time when she was 3 mo. old. She beamed because she recognized his face and voice from the Viber calls. They have such a special relationship now and she’s 6. It’s hard though and my prayers are with you!