I need some advice please. I am out of ideas and pretty soon out of hope too. My fiancé and I have a blended family. He had two kids when we met, I had two kids from my ex husband and together we have one toddler. It’s been a tough past 5 years, financially. I was mostly the one always working and providing for our family so he can be home with our daughter and he can build his painting contracting business. He would get little jobs here and there but nothing steady enough to provide. He found a job as a painter meanwhile so we can get back on our feet but the owner of the business is out of work temporarily and my fiancé is working all day at a barbershop since he went to school to become a barber years ago. I currently got laid off my job and looking for employment. Because we want to give our kids the best school to go we moved to a very expensive area in Miami, of which, the only affordable apt we were able to get within our budget is a one bedroom for $1400 a month. We manage pretty well considering we only have the 4 older kids half the time, we have 50/50 with both parents. So because we are struggling we are having a hard time paying this month’s rent and the owner pretty much told us we can break the lease without any consequences if we need to. My family has always helped us out financially when we needed it, I just hate to ask for help from them again…I am trying to look for rent elsewhere but the rent in Miami is insanely expensive and if we cant even pay 1400, idk how we will manage anywhere else. I am out of ideas of what we can possibly do. His mother’s apt is a no, she has section 8 and it’s a huge risk she will take if she takes us in for a few months, her apt is even smaller than ours - which it’s still doable but difficult. Every year it’s something different, we really can’t catch a break. I am just out of ideas and not sure what to do anymore. I keep applying for jobs but no one calls, I cant get anything that doesnt pay enough bc then I’ll only be working to pay for a daycare for my daughter and that’s not the point. any advice is greatly appreciated. Thank you ladies.
Maybe try for daycare assistants and food stamps to get on ur feet or if there is any housing that is income based. Maybe see if u can babysit other kids? Keep applying to places and call them every couple of days to check on ur apps. Good luck hope it gets better!
That is so crazy!!! Here rent for a pretty decent home is 500ish. You get up to 5 or 6 bedrooms you move to an 800 range. 1400 for a one bedroom, sheesh!! Maybe move to a smaller area or town? If that isn’t an option maybe going back to school at night or online? Struggle now instead of later. Ive been in school for 9 years and counting finishing my PhD. We have three kids and my husband is a coal miner. So we make it ok, but when I’m done with school, a lot of our struggling will be over and so so so so worth it. Goodluck mama!
Military is a great option you may want to consider.
If not look into state assistance of some sort. I live in Kansas and while I don’t want to be here forever, it’s currently very affordable for this single mom in the Army Reserves.
Get out of expensively posh area. Live like us ordinary folks. Work hard, don’t expect hand outs, and stop bludging on your parents. We got married and had nothing, lived pay to pay. Never had enough petrol to even go to the beach. We were happy with just having each other.
So for everyone telling her to move to another state should just stop. That doesn’t help her. She had 50/50 of her kids from a previous relationship and her husband has 50/50 of his own kids. If both sets of kids also live in Florida and they move out of state they could possibly both lose their 50/50 time with the kids. Depending on the kids age they might not be able to travel by plane by themselves and since money is already tight I highly doubt they could afford to pay for a plane ticket to make the trip to pick their kid up and fly back to where they’re living. Also telling her how cheap rent is where you live is also unhelpful.
Look into working at a daycare. Some provide free childcare while you work. Also if you haven’t already, apply for food stamps. Even if you aren’t eligible it still doesn’t hurt to try. You can also try and apply for housing assistance. I know you don’t like to ask your parents for help, but there should never be any shame in asking for it. Try looking to see if you can find a place to live that’s not Miami but still allows your kids to attend the schools you want if they are able to commute. The school might charge you a fee for being out of county but by moving to an area where rent is cheaper might allow you to cover that cost. Also if you and your husband haven’t already, apply for jobs that are out of your area. It may be a longer commute to and from work, but if there are more openings outside your area you guys could make it work. Just keep your head up mama and good luck will come your way.
There are good schools in other areas. I don’t know if you have a support system locally and how far you can move without affecting visitation arrangements, but it sounds like you need to move. Even if it’s just into a different neighborhood.
Does not matter which state is your residence, they all have a form of state aid, here is called Community Based Services under Dept of Health and Human Services. Although Medicaid is a State and Federal Program, each state may vary and will have a variety of different directions and programs to help your family. Take with you 3 months bank statements, a copy of your last 2 pay stubs, a piece of mail bearing your current address, a current government picture ID ie drivers license or ID. Ask about Health Ins, Food Stamps, Heat Assistance, Job Training, Educational Classes, Day Care Services. You never know when you start turning over rocks what you might find. Job search close to home is sometimes limited opportunities, but it costs little to clean up and start walking in local areas introducing yourself as from the hood and interested in work close to home and steady. Go to the Library and get on their computer or read Help Wanted Ads in local paper. You must pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again. If you had a job, everyday you would have to be up and at work at 8am. Do not stay up all night on TV and sleep in every day. Be out the door at 8am and looking for a job, do not come home until 5pm. Beginning today, your job is to find a job, now that’s a job.
Killing me and laura.do you think it’s him?
Move to a more affordable neighborhood and do school of choice. If he’s home, then you don’t need daycare… Or maybe get nights while he works days until you find something that pays enough.