AITA for this issue with my neighbor?

Am I the Butthole? I live in an upstairs apartment with my toddler (she’ll be 2 in March). I KNOW her running around and playing has to be annoying during the day for the family downstairs. So I try to keep her playing in just one room, and once 8pm comes it’s quiet time. (Mind you the noise ordinance in my county is 10pm.) The other 4 apartments don’t have kids, so 8pm is turn up time for them. Loud music, loud video games, in and out slamming doors all night. The lady downstairs plays music at night while she cleans, and it’s always loud and the bass rattles my floors. But as long as they don’t wake up my baby, it’s whatever, do you. Shared building, shared experiences. Until yesterday. She called our landlord and complained about my daughter being too loud at 2 in the afternoon. My landlord texted me asking me to try my best to keep her from running back and forth. Again, I understand it can be annoying for someone without young kids. So I shrugged it off and gave her an early nap. While my daughter was napping she was talking on the phone and laughing so loud I could hear her in my daughter’s room. So I stomped on the floor. Then her music was blasting at 11, so I stomped on the floor then too. Each time I can hear her cussing me out If you expect me to keep my toddler quiet during the day, respect that she’s sleeping at night! Or at least follow the noise ordinance.

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Repay the favor record it and send it to the landlord.

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Nope, I’d do the same thing

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I would turn her in every time now… call the cops after 10 and report to landlord every time… plus your child doesn’t have to be quiet in afternoon…I always say the should be families with kids on bottom

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We put foam mats and extra throw rugs down when we were the “upstairs neighbors with kids”. Anything to cushion the thumps of little running feet. We used fans and a white noise machine so the downstairs neighbors didn’t interrupt our routines with their noise. You could go talk to them and get friendly. At the end of the day, y’all are neighbors. A little courtesy and understanding on everybody’s part would do some good.

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ohhh hunny let me tell you. when i moved in my apartment my landlord who lives downstairs mine you absolutely knew i had 4 kids under 10 the youngest being 2 at the time. i also had a quiet time whivh was around 8-830pm & my kids were in their rooms on the 3rd floor. my landlord texted me at approximately 430pm one day demanding i shut my kids up & that’s when i let that man have it. i went offff - i think your doin everything by the book & u need to make the landlord aware of the noise late at night .

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Better start recording everything in case she starts going psycho. Start calling the cops on her when it’s after 10 and you hear loud noises so there is a record for her too. After so many calls the landlord might get on to her too

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Leaving downstairs of someone with kids / or laud people is very difficult and annoying, but you are doing your best to try to keep your daughter quiet and your neighbor should return the favor , you should text your landlord and complain about her as well, record her so you can have proff.

My upstairs neighbors are so damn loud and annoying, I swear to God that I will make them move if they were NOT my mom and sister

I’d introduce myself and my child with a plant and try Just explaining the situation.
I got bit on my butt by my neighbors dog and as i was reprimanding her it dawned on me we actually work together. Now we are friends and laugh about the butt biter!!! She gave me flowers and an apology card!

I would contact the landlord when they are doing it or call the cops and make a report as proof if you don’t feel safe recording yourself.

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Ugh. Don’t start a feud. Invite her for coffee in or out and see if you can work things out. Are there places like parks, playgrounds or RECenters where you can take your daughter? Maybe just walks in the neighborhood if there are sidewalks, so she’s not indoors all the time. Maybe there are times when your neighbor needs to concentrate more when you can have story time and times when neighbor does more routine work when she/he can tolerate more noise. Knowing each other as people as opposed to “that one” will help combat the urge to retaliate all the time, which makes the situation progressively worse. Make cookies for your neighbor on days when y’all are particularly noisy.

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I would make records of the noise coming from them and send that to the landlord and make sure time is say/night is included.

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Record her play music at night show the time and then turn her in

Nope your not I would go bat shit on them. Let that baby run

Been there done that. Call the cops on the witch if she plays that music too loud especially after quiet time.

I would tell your landlord to tell them it’s part of living in an apartment :woman_shrugging: It’s not past curfew and your child is 2. People are wild

Record the noise, report to landlord, if after 10 pm send the cops.

Record it on video with the audio from your apartment every time it happens. Keep doing it every single time. Let her keep complaining. Just compile your evidence and say NOTHING.

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I had a neighbor like that. He flipped his lid one time when my then 4 year old dumped her mega blocks out to play with in the middle of the afternoon. His gf actually came up and told me that the noise from my child “scared her so bad” that she thought she should call the cops in case someone was breaking in. :woozy_face: Mind you I did my best to keep things as quiet as possible, even during the day. Yet he would have his TV up so loud (after 10pm) that it VIBRATED MY COUCH. Not to mention the times he woke me up out of a dead sleep at 4am because he was screaming bloody murder at his girlfriend… on speakerphone… then took the same screaming match out into the courtyard. Of course it was nicer weather too so we had windows open. I do NOT miss apartment living at all!

It doesn’t sound like you’ve done anything wrong as far as apartments go.

Two options:

  1. Record and send all times she’s past the noise ordinance to the landlord or call the police. Actually record it all over the course of a couple weeks just to keep it on hand if there’s an issue later on.
  2. Go talk to her and find out her schedule and explain you’re trying to be respectful. Maybe she works different hours so your daughter can be noisy at different hours without an issue.
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I wouldn’t worry about my kid playing during the day, you don’t want to hear your neighbors? Move…

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I’d record all the evening noise and play to your land lord and say this is at night your kids being a kid during day I have recorded my old neighbors fighting all hrs and reported put recording mic on your phone and should have time next to recording.oh mind u I live in apt building 7 apt these neighbors were not below me they were downstairs across hall we have hollow floors and walls.i heard my neighbors with my door shut.

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Move asap. Im sorry. From my experiences its your only choice. Baby should be aloud to play and grow up! But those people will only probably get worse…

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Get a downstairs apartment but she need to respect you too. This is drama you don’t need. I’d move if possible find peace somewhere else

I would call the landlord the same time she is playing her music very loudly.

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You are definitely not the asshole! That bitter lady is the asshole! Doesn’t she have a job or something better to do during the day then worrying about your toddler running around playing AND HAVING FUN like toddlers SHOULD BE DOING!?
Ultimately, this is harassment and illegal. Record her little childish outbursts, every time she plays her loud music during quiet time hours, and then turn it into the landlord or proper authorities.

i would have another kid just to piss her off ! what a loser, sorry!

Ah nah. That’s bs. Stand your ground. Start telling landlord and recording. Being loud at 2pm is NOT the same as 11pm. If she works nights then she’s the one that has to deal better since most do not. I hated working nights for this reason.

Nope not an asshole. If tell the landlord that everyone blasts music all night. She’s a kid, cops won’t even do anything about children making noise, even at like 2am, bc is a child. But adults being petty and unnecessarily loud after 10pm and before 7am, they can do something about

I would let them landlord know as long as they are not considerate of notice why should your two year old be?

She’s paying u back for being loud neighbor :joy::joy::joy::joy:

I would call cops not the landlord :woman_shrugging:t3:

She shouldn’t have called about the kid playing during the day. You moved into an apartment building being the only one with a kid. You don’t get to impose quiet time for everyone else

You’re definitely not the AH

Not the butthole but i would record her noise and complain to the landlord.

After 10pm.start calling the cops. Your being more then nice having her down at 8pm.

Do you have carpet? That helps with noise that way she won’t hear you as much and it might help with her music

Get thick underlay and carpet

Report her loud music and even record it if it’s that loud. I’ve done that to someone who lived above me in an apartment and he got evicted after so many complaints. Give her a taste of her own medicine :pill:

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I would let her taste her own medicine and report her every time she is loud past 10. I would record it and show the landlord.

Honestly don’t even worry about it, I used to worry all the time because my son is constantly on the go, jumping, running, spinning, climbing, falling… my downstairs neighbours must hate it, but I can’t restrict him, I just got him a mini trampoline because it’s very beneficial for him. Fuck em😂

You’re not the butthole, the neighbor is. Start complaining to the landlord about her nightly loudness esp when it happened after 10pm

First of all i’m sure the landlord knew you had a kid before you even moved in upstairs so that’s on the landlord second of all if and when your daughter is sleeping at night and you can hear the radio and it’s making your floors rattle at night after 10 pm call the cops and complain, plain and simple .

I’ll report her for her loud music and every other loud noise she’s causing as well. She needs to understand that 2 year old children are very active and have no control over the noise they make. Record her playing her music & any other noise the neighbor makes and let the landlord hear it.

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Document everything with the landlord.

Nope I didn’t think you’re the a**hole. They should work with you. Kids are unexpected and unpredictable. Anybody with half a brain should know that :thinking:

I’ve been in your situation and the fact that your landlord is asking you to quiet your child…. From child like actives is your sign to move. Trust me.

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That is life in two story apartment living. It will be no different if you relocate. Go for a one story apartment complex, plenty of them around. Might be a little more expensive, however, will be worth it for you to have more peace in your life.

Your toddler is annoying so you cannot have demands and expect others to be quiet. This is part of apartment living.

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