Am I in a relationship with the wrong person?

He’s too old for you.

If you are having to ask this question, you are in the wrong relationship

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You have a heart that’s dosen’t want to hurt him but sometimes you have to, if you keep these feelings bottled up you will regret it!

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It sounds like you have Daddy issues and your friend is a pedophile.

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Do what makes you happy and makes you feel good

You definitely need to end things with your fiance.
Tbh I know that my man gets annoyed bc I’m on my phone so much… So I’ve been working on that. But I’ve never been so distant that I didn’t realize that he was hanging out with another female!!!

And the co-worker sounds great but that’s how most men act when they are trying to get with someone and at the beginning of the relationship!
And he might have good intentions… But he might not.
Personally I would continue to get to know him much better as a friend before getting into a relationship with him.

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Does your “friend” have life insurance? :rofl:

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Communication is key. If your not telling him your feeling’s how will he know. Talk to him. Tell him how you feel. Let him know that just simply telling you he loves you is not enough.

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Your guy isn’t going to change. I think you already know what to do where he’s concerned. The older man sounds lonely too, he’s too old for you.

Lol you say your fiance doesn’t love you but to me it looks like you don’t love him. You need to learn how to be single and love yourself.

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I don’t know about the new friend but get rid of the fiancé

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Get rid of both of them!

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Break off the engagement and chill for bit

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Do whatever makes you happy!!!

All 8mma say, is who gives a damn about age. You’re plenty old enough 5o make that choice yourself. Who cares about that.

It sounds like you’re in the wrong relationship and possibly need to be by yourself for a bit until you figure out what you want. You’re engaged to someone yet you’re spending time with another man and not even just yourself, but with your children also. Now I’d see nothing wrong with that if you guys were strictly friends and nothing else in any way… as people are allowed to have friends even while in a relationship, but it’s not just a friend because you both have said you have feelings for each other. In my opinion you should end it with your partner because if it was him you really wanted that’s what you’d be focused on instead of spending a bunch of your time with another man.

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Let the friend remain a friend until you really have sorted out what you want out of a relationship. The engagement should be broken off and the end of that relationship, if he’s acting like this and y’all aren’t even married, it’s not going to improve. Best wishes to you.

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Yuck, the friend could be your dad. I’d leave the fiancée and find yourself a more age appropriate man.

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Me and my hubby were like that we parted 9 months and got back I think time apart gives u time to see what you want and appreciate it if you get it back

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What if the girl is 56 and the guy is 24 ??? Could that work long term ???

58? Guaranteed baggage at that age… Drop the fiance … do not pursue the ‘friend’ :person_facepalming: You’re 25 with a few kids how about just focus on those kids for now.

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Give yourself some time. Figure out what you really want.

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You need to leave both of these men alone. Your relationship with your fiancé is going nowhere if you can develop feelings for another man. If he was the one for you, no other man could turn your head. As far as the “friend” I’m not judging you for the age difference but this man’s old enough to be your father. I think that if you weren’t so love-starved from the unfulfilling relationship, this attachment wouldn’t have formed. Also, you don’t want to be in a relationship with someone who has designs on another man’s fiancée. If they’ll do it with you, they’ll do it to you.

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Communication!!! If you don’t speak your feelings, if you bury them, then leak on the internet, it does you zero good in your current relationship. I’ve been married for 20 very long years, some with great communication, some with literally ZERO communication. One of the secrets is to know how to communicate…do it without yelling, do it with being able to control your heartbreak, and do it with the expectation that HE has to want to participate in the relationship.

Sounds like you’ve made your choice already :woman_shrugging: that’s a pretty intense emotional affair going on currently with said friend.

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Focus on your kids. Not men. Period

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Can you not figure this out yourself?You really have to ask strangers?

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Better remain single n focus on ur kids.That my opinion.we can’t trust anyone nowadays.live ur life.

Drop the side dude and communicate what you want in the relationship with your fiance or do him a favor and leave him. Nobody deserves to be cheated on physically or emotionally.

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Neither is the right person for you. Be single for a good while.

You need time on your own . That will give you the space you need to see if you really need either of them . I don’t think you do .

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Your friend is to old … Dont you be sorry later stay friends. Stop calling the boyfriend if he wants to talk to you he will call you. Make him chase you if not just leave it alone.

Hook up with the friend

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Grass is never green on the other side. Work on your relationship…try…if it fails…leave and then start over. Don’t be that woman…you know the one we all hate. Lol good luck

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Girl… just no. Communicate with your fiance if youre so concerned but youre already emotionally cheating on him, make a decision. And your ‘friend’ is too old, think about your kids.

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New friend. Drop the phone guy

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I left a guy for a friend about 10 years ago. I never thought that I could fall for someone else when I was dating someone, but found myself in that situation. The guy I was dating treated me like a sex object, and didn’t take my feelings, or my kids feelings, into consideration. The guy I left him for, is my husband, whom I still adore. I think you already know what you need to do, and are worried about hurting the feelings of someone who ignores you.

Age is just a number but if you donr feel happy with the guy your wirh and think you would be happy with the older guy then you know the answer, maybe time for a fresh start, but please explain to the guy your with that things aren’t working out and your not happy etc wish you luck what ever you decide xx

Actions speak louder than words!!

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Older men have a little something extra that young men don’t have. However you shouldn’t fall into this guy without being single for a while after you break up with your fiancé whom your not happy with

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Every body says age aint nothing but a number… But girllllll someone who is almost 60 years old… old enough to be your dad :pleading_face: Nah… really think about it… I say leave both of them… focus on yourself and your kids your still so young do not settle… This older guy i not on the same level as you… in this situation I believe age does matter…. If you were in your 40’s then that’s different but this guy shouldn’t even be considering you either as a partner for himself, men our pigs sheesh!

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I dont think age matters. I know a girl who is only 32 N married to a guy almost 80. Been together since she was 15…I dont think it was right a guy in his 60s being w someone that young it was repulsive at first. But shes honestly happy. It wasn’t for money either they live normal lives adopted a little girl and he works at Walmart :woman_shrugging: sometimes it just happens. I think you should follow what your heart is saying. Your current so might not be the one if he’s not showing that he is happy to have you. Id call it off give it time to see if he realizes what he’s lost and stay friends w other for a while and after the time is taken to heal from other one see where it truly lies. Good luck

If you really do love your fiance, go get some marriage counseling. If it doesn’t work out after that then leave him and stay single until you figure your life out and focus on your children and yourself.

What a mess … you need to be alone and take care of your kids. You don’t need a man complete you and your friend is to old for you.

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Marry a phone? Even if it’s he older man is not the one I wouldn’t marry a phone but someone who cares

You think you like him cause he is giving you what you want from your partner honestly you need to be single. you’re emotionally cheating on him nd he’s emotionally neglecting you either y’all figure it out or be single nd oh course an old dude is guna give you all the attention it’s every old man’s dream to get a young thang while he old not cool tho would you even give this old dude the time of day if you was single ? Nope you wouldnt

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Don’t get married, he is not going to change. He might for a few weeks.but he will go back to being on the phone. If your not happy with him then let him go.

End your engagement and do what makes you happy.

Life is too short do what makes you happy

I’m not judging but you are a young 25 year old woman and he is a 58 year old man! Your life is JUST beginning. It’s great that he gives you attention and all that but you can easily find someone with the same qualities that is a little more of an appropriate age for you. I do think you need to talk to your fiancé about your concerns because if you aren’t happy then maybe it’s time to end things. Be single for a while, it was the best thing I ever did and I learned to really appreciate and love myself. You gotta think about your kids in this situation.

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Sounds like you’re looking for a some attention. Mention this to your fiancé. If he still doesn’t get it, remind him you’re still young and attractive and there’s already someone interested, then see if he cares.

End it. It may end in a divorce also if you marry him.

You need to leave your fiance and work on yourself before you start any relationships.
People like you are the problem. Dragging your s/o around when you know damn well you dont want to be stuck in that relationship. Starting to have feelings for someone else.

If you are acting on doubts, it may be time to break engagement. Discuss your needs with fiancé, determine whether you want to live married life as you are now, and what is best for children. Easy to marry, difficult to divorce.

Be careful this older guy isn’t a player my suggestion leave phone guy if your not happy and don’t get played. Be single Be happy Be a good Mum

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Just because someone treats you right at the start doesn’t mean it’ll continue! He could turn out to be worse then what you have now!!
They usually always do their best to get you then it all changes once they have you!!

Either try your hardest to make things work with your current relationship or leave him! He deserves that at least!!

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Don’t get married he won’t suddenly change if you get married, break it off and do what makes you happy

It’s kinda sus that this old man knows you’re engaged and is acting this way toward you. Would he does this to another woman if y’all get together?

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The grass may seem greener on the other side but maybe try watering the grass you stand on first. If you do your best to try and mend what you already have then you can freely walk away with no regrets.

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Be with the one that makes you happy

So you’re cheating? Girl bye.

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Age difference means nothing .Piss the fiancee and his phone off now .

Be with who makes you happy. Life is too short to be miserable.

Come out and let him know at least new relationships always are the best at first he’s way to old for you I’m 53 and I would never be with a girl that young since my daughter is 29 and I been married for 29 yrs trust me you just want someone to treat you better and that’s ok but tell you’re fiancee wants going on and if he’s not right for you thin ok

No use in staying where your presence isn’t appreciated. If you and your kids aren’t your mans priority then leave him. Do what makes you and your kids more happy.

Everything is great when it is new and the grass isn’t always greener on the other side lol. Don’t poo poo the age difference. It is a big one. It may not make a difference now, but it will in the future.

You already answered your ? You should not marry your fiance if your already questioning him and hanging around with another man.

1st dont jump from a boat to a ship. There aren’t any life boats.

Sounds as if you fiance is content, not interested in the nxt step . So if he isnt giving what you need and you feel disconnect than time to go.
Your 2nd friend seems to give you what you’re wanting not needing. Dont get those 2 mixed up. It fresh and exciting at the moment but so was you relationship you’re in now.
Take a minute and live.
No man comes before you and children needs.

I was married for 17yrs to a man who was content not involved …Its not a life I would of chose if I knew.

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The 58 yr old guy is too old for u hon, of course he likes u, ur a young woman that strokes his ego. Im gonna be honest here, the age sotuation is not gonna work cause eventually he wld be extremely jealous cause older men with younger woman is how that works. Been there done that and it didnt last. Ive been the older and the younger and when push comes to shove yall will have nothing in common. That was my experience. Ur bf soumds too immature for a family, so id personally let him go, remain just friends with the older guy and wait for the rt guy to come along. Just cause u dump ir bf, doesnt mean u have to jump straight into another relationship. Take care of u and ur kods, theyre the ones u should be putting ur time and emotions into rt now. The right one will come along eventually.

You’re definitely in the wrong relationship!! Dump the zero and snatch that hero!!

Don’t marry him. It won’t get better. Your with the wrong man.

I think you need to be on your own …get to know someone away from your kids because in the end its the kids that end up hurt with trust issues trust me on that one xxxxx

58 damn…take it from me I’m 33 and my husband is 47 and it takes everything to not run away daily. We aren’t ever on the same page because he’s set in his ways and will never change. Take time for you, don’t rush into anything and regret it later :sleepy:

Take the Maintenance man, if he says something it’s true, Maintenance men are trouble shooters , they find problems before they start and fix them and they are mostly Gentleman, they mean what they say and do what they say. Just my opinion

Dump EVERYBODY. They playing you. They know you are young and dumb and easily swayed because of the reasons you stated. Needing attention and blah blah blah. Run! Cuz the fiance is a whiny jerk. The old dude is OLD. He thinks he’s getting lucky af…just to start bossing you around like you don’t know shit.CUZ YOU DON’T!! and if there IS a third person " the customer" then he’s a fucking stalker and possibly the “killer”! So find a new job a.new place and some GOT DAMN FRIENDS and hangout and GROW UP! You’ll be ready for a relationship when? much much later… seriously. GTFO of all that. Go be young…you can’t waste your youth on this stupid shit! God bless you. :muscle::pray::v:

Well in 5 years the new guy will be an old man and won’t be playing around with your kids either lmfao​:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Stuck in his phone…adhd?

You know what to do :heart: