Call jerry springer he will help you.
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What you are doing is emotional cheating and to me personally that’s worse than physical cheating. You need to be honest with you man and tell him what’s going on so he can move on from you. Yeah he might be ignoring you but you are the one that has already moved on and you just haven’t had the balls to let him know that.
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I’m not judging you about the age gap, I’m judging the creepy old man. I’m sorry, I get you’re technically “legal” but this whole situation sounds like you’ve stumbled across a man who is grooming you and taking advantage of the situation you’re in with your relationship. Please do not get with him and please, please whatever you do, please do NOT give this man access to your children!!!
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If you find yourself having to choose between the two, pick the the other one. If you truly loved your fiance and are happy with him, you wouldn’t even need to ask these questions.
Also, you need to make sure he truly feels the same as you and isn’t just manipulating you due to your young age and the fact that you feel unappreciated/neglected in your relationship.
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It seems like he also could be taking advantage of you in your emotional state. You confided in this man and now feel connected to him. But ask your self could you see your self taking care of him if something were to happen to him as he is 58, something could happen than your his caregiver. Than what?
And the age gap and the fact that you have small children could be concerning. He could be grooming all of you to gain trust.
Above all try speaking with your spouse about how you are feeling. Maybe he isn’t the one, but the other side of the coin don’t go rushing off into an older man’s arms because he is the one giving you what you need most, which is to be heard, understood, and loved.
If you do leave your fiance give yourself sometime to figer out what you and your kids need.
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This new guy may like you a lot but may not want it to go further. That friendship needs backing off and toning down while you sort your actual relationship. You need to focus on that. Talk with your partner and make whatever decisions are right for you and him without anyone else. Who’s to say this other guy will throw his arms open and happily start a relationship if you ended your current one for him? Who’s to say he won’t be freaked out at what you’ve done snd run a mile, then you have no one? You need to tell him that you need to back right off while you sort out your home life. If he is fond of you then he’ll respect that and stay out of your way for a while. If you guys are meant to be, he will still be there but you need to forget him for now. Your current and the kids, arrangements for them and sorting out your home takes priority
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Sounds like your boyfriend has got comfortable in the relationship. Id speak with him about how you’re feeling and back away from the friend for abit. Always seems exciting and nice at the start with someone new but you may regret your decision if you don’t try in your current relationship first x
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I’d say you already ended the relationship by even exploring this. He’s in his phone but you are already looking for other people. Next, why let the kids even get involved when this is a mess? I think that you may need to end your relationship and not get in another one until you decide who you want to be with. Cheating has many forms and it doesn’t always have to be actually dating or sleeping with someone else. This is a form of cheating to some people and you need to think of how you’d react if your partner was doing this to you. In my opinion, which everyone has their own, the moment you had to put the person your suppose to be with in comparison to someone else you ended the relationship. You are upset he’s on his phone all the time so your reaction is to get attention from somewhere else rather than solve your problem first and that means you aren’t 100% committed. But keep the children out of it. They shouldn’t be meeting anyone else at all right now. People need to learn children aren’t blind. People do stuff around children and then they get involved and can blame themselves or have severe anxiety in order to feel like they have to feel a certain way or keep a secret.
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Have sex with the 58 yr old if he’s still acts the same. Leave your current POSITION! You’re fired lol
Need to focus on your fiancé and try everything you both can to fix the relationship. Then you’ll know the path. Older guy is a friend.
Your 25, with kids. Neither are good for you or kids. Don’t confuse “love” or comfort
with “love” leave them both. Think of your kids. First a mother than a woman.
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You need to break it off with the finance. Hes immature. As far as the 58 year old, I think he’s way too old for you but after you break it off with your fiance, you can explore other relationships.
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You already know your answer listen to your heart
Personally I don’t see anything wrong with the age gap!! Would be a different story if you were a lot younger but you are a grown Woman.
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Why not talk to your fiance and figure your shit out. Why does everyone always just leave or start cheating? How about an adult conversation to express how you’re feeling before finding a new guy. Unless you really don’t care about your fiance, then do you both the favor and leave him.
4 yrs and still no marriage? Is there even a date? Shouldn’t u be more focused on setting a date than finding love somewhere else? And this guy is 58 he’s obviously more mature men take a while to mature. Always remember the grass isn’t greener on the other side. Ur gonna regret it.
You do know what you should do.
Ditch the fiance and start enjoying your life.
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Don’t marry that fiance but for sure don’t hook up with that 58 year old. Unless it’s just casual. At least until you get to know him better. Groomers always look for young naive women with children. I see a red flag.
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Stay single. End engagement. Leave the 58 yr old alone romantically. That big if a age gap. That man is not right either.
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Your in the wrong and need to communicate with him if the shoe was on the other food and your partner was hanging out of another female like that then he’d be strung out to dry the attention is nice but is it worth losing your family only last a lil while
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Emotional relationship are still cheating
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tell your partner how you feel xxxx
You do not need to be in any relationship. How would you feel if you boyfriend was seeing someone else? Be single for a while.
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Don’t start anything, with someone else, while still with someone. Regardless of how you’re feeling, or how they are making you feel. It isn’t right. You’re having feelings for someone else. And entertaining him, by him telling you that he has feelings for you. While being engaged. Because your fiance doesn’t make you happy. Or fulfill you, or help you out. You shouldn’t be with him. You’re not happy. You shouldn’t marry someone, that doesn’t make you happy before you’ve even got married yet.
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Everything is great in the beginning but you never know if u leave ur fiancé buddy might end up being the same … end of the day follow your gut but make your decision quick cause it impacts your current relationship and WILL impact your potential future relationship … especially if you cheat on your fiancé the new guy won’t forget that
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Be careful the grass is not always greener on the other side! After 4 years will he still be as exciting? Will he always be as energetic with the kids and loving even when he has ‘won you over’? I think it’s best off you talk with your partner first about how he feels about splitting up. Tell him you are making arrangements to be single and it might spook him into putting his phone down and showing you some attention. Maybe try being single a little first before you jump into a relationship. Just do whatever is best for you and the kids in the long run.
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I would say you are too young to be in a relationship right now, you need to focus on yourself and your kids. As long as you do that, the right man will come along, the reason I know is you sound like me, you don’t want to be alone, but you want better, break it off with your fiance, casually date the older gentleman, and take your kids everytime, non-negotiable, and see how he feels then. But, work on being okay with you, you are a single mom, who is making it out there, good for you, and you are working, I know it’s hard, I am a widow, but I left when my son was a month old, I got no child support, I did get WIC but that was it
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Get rid of him and do it makes you happy you’re still young
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The grass is not greener on the other side. Try watering your grass first♥️ yes men get too into their phones. But here’s the thing, men are not sharpest at taking hints. You have to have a mature conversation about what you want and don’t want without pointing the finger. Your developing emotions for other bc they pay attention to you, did your fiancé do that too in the beginning? Did he play with your kids in the beginning? These are things you need to stop and think about.
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Always go with your gut instinct.
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Do whatever makes you happy!! Go with the older guy!
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You already have your mind made up… all those details you posted tells everyone that. You know what you want to do. Stop doubting yourself. Your not married girly so GET IT lol. If all else fails I think you’ll come to understand if you’re finding a problem with everyone you encounter most often the problem is you. Take the time to get your legs underneath you and steady yourself… I’m not going to feed you some love yourself bullshit. That looks different for everyone. Still important though. What’s causing you to be searching for validation or entertain from two guys (neither one sounds like the best fit)? Take care of you and your kids first. You know what’s really right. Trust your true intuition. Next best foot forward and everything works out.
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First dump ur fiance … like completely
Second, date both the other guys and let them know ur not committing exclusively right now
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Honestly the age difference is more than you think once you get to know someone. Y’all were literally born in different generations. It won’t work. But you deserve to be happy… not with someone you developed feelings for while in a relationship…the man knows and doesn’t respect that. Plus work shit never works out. What you didn’t add… is he married? A lot of older men are and prey on 20 something year olds. How about realize what caused you to fall in love with the person you’re with? People use phones when they have anxiety because it’s something to hold in their hands and look at while in uncomfortable situations. If your fiancée works all day I mean I would be on my phone too, because he didn’t get to look at it all day. Basically break it down.
You want someone who is double your age red flag 
and someone you work with.
Someone who knows you’re in a relationship but is still hanging around your kids and building a bond they shouldn’t be, neither you nor him care
Doesn’t seem like you want to try and bring back any passion and you’ve made up your mind. I feel bad for him. I struggle with depression and I use my phone for the videos to cheer me up most days. Maybe cuddle up and ask what he’s doing? Maybe his love language isn’t words of affirmation and yours is. When’s the last time you showed him you love him? Men like to be spoiled too!
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He’s too old for you. He’ll be retiring while you are just beginning. Speaking from experience.
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Babes… You answered your own question. You already know what to do. 
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Easy give the boyfriend the flick tell him why don’t waste your time move on if this other guy is paying an interest in you and your feelings for him then you both need to talk about it.But yep I say boyfriend you’re outta here I’m taking it he doesn’t live with you than go for it
Girl maybe you just need to be alone and find yourself.
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Dump em both and see who you miss and who really wants you communication is the key
You only live once and you dont wsmt to waste your years wondering and waiting for him to cherish you and your kids if he loves you you wont need to wonder and wait you will know and feel it. Be happy girl dont wait til hes ready to grow up live your life to the fullest cuz when your happy your kids are happy 
Do Not get married. Time to move on. Stay friends with other guy. When you are on your own feet again,then see how you feel about friend.
Age won’t matter if you both care. I am 15 years older than my boyfriend and we have a great relationship. But we wete friends for 4 years before we got together. Life is to short to be unhappy.
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You know the answer. Break off your engagement and current relationship. See how it goes with the other guy. Just take it slow. Guys his age are more appreciative of women
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I don’t think, anyone realizes… She’s talking about 2 different guys, besides her fiance… The older guy… And then a customer that’s became a friend…
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Loves doesn’t judge age. If you are second guessing it before being married, maybe married isn’t the right choice with him.
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If you have to ask, you already know. Why would you even WANT to marry someone who treats you the way your fiancé does?!
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Break away from both of them before you make a mistake.
Sometimes distance puts things into perspective.
Your only feeling this way because your not getting attention, you only know this “bar guy” at face value, of course someone will interact differently in a social situation.
Imagine leaving your current guy and ending up with some other dude you met at the bar that you’ll complain he’s never home cause he’s at the bar cause “he’s tired after work”
Some men have a hard time showing affection and just love to have their lady near them. I am a type where I have trouble showing feelings but I think of my wife all day and love when she just sits near me while I’m doing whatever.
Talk to your man. The bar guy is a mental distraction causing you to lapse judgment.
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Hes telling u what u want to hear…atleastbreak it off with ur current BF?dont cheat…not fair to him…if hes like my be honest and leave…it will hurt him like hell but hes better off
You definitely don’t love the first one enough to marry him or you would have never developed feelings for the second one. If that helps
I don’t think either one sounds like a good idea. Take break and focus on you and your kids.
Gee that’s a handful, would do my head in ,it’s like your craving all the attention you can get ,you need to find yourself first and be very careful who you let around your children 
You need to leave because you’re lusting over another man and take time to reflect & figure yourself out
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First, y’all have been together for 4yrs & don’t even live together?? Second, have you sat down and even talked to him? Are you sure it’s him & not you? JS. You have to find that spark again, life isn’t always going to be happy and jolly. Maybe he had a rough day, maybe he’s tired, maybe he doesn’t know how to feel or express himself. Maybe you gotta try to plan some things for you guys to do. & if that doesn’t work then kick him to the curb. As for your friend I would just stay friends until you really know what you want. I’ve been down many roads… Best of luck!
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Its simple if you’re not happy leave! Don’t jump into a new relationship work on you first
Create space to let someone decent to come in. Remember to. Let what you have go first then work on yourself. Someone suitable for you will come. There is also a saying. Do t shi+ where you eat. If this is at your work place do t bother. It could potentially create issues there
I notice you never said that you loved you fiance
Sounds like I wouldn’t get married to your fiancé then.
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Let’s see… it’s a mom page so…… focus on your poor kid.
This was me. Kinda. Change the jobs. I’m in nursing and my new man is in landscaping, ex husband is a locksmith. I hated him. HATED him. I’m 25, my ex husband is 45. (My new man is a lot closer to my age)
One random day I came across my new man. Started hanging with him. Kept pleading my husband to PLEASE CHANGE. Please love me, please spend time with me. Please put effort. No changes. None. He was cheating on me with my SISTER. YEP.
I started catching feelings for the new guy, he treated my son and I just the way I longed. I left my ex husband and it’s 2 years and I am happy.
I am in love. We have the most amazing and beautiful mixed family now.
Do what your gut says. People who have never been in this kinda situation will always judge.
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If you have to ask…then yes, yes you are.
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Ditch the guy you’re engaged to. Things will get worse after marriage. Believe me…I KNOW!!!
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Dump your fiancé and get with the guy who actually cares about you
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Have a serious talk with ur fiancée. U have to let him know how his actions are making u feel. And as far as the older dude id just keep it friends. Man o man he is going to age so far ahead of u that would be my only concern about a man of thay age. But heck never know.
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Tell the bloke your with now jog on u derserve more x
If you have to ask if you’re in the wrong relationship, you’re in the wrong relationship
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Only an idiot would stay with someone that never asks you over or acts like your not around when you are with them.
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No matter what, break it off with the fiancé. You obviously know he’s not the one. Stay alone for a while, date, enjoy and give life a chance. Enjoy the ride, nothing has to be set in stone.
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I say go where you feel wanted. If it doesn’t work out, go somewhere else where you feel wanted lol the fiancé is probably always in his phone making someone else feel wanted.
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Go to your boyfriends, walk over to him while he is ignoring you and on his phone and say in a soft whispering voice “Honey i have a secret to tell you” then reach out slowly and take the phone out of his hand. Then throw it on the ground and start stomping on it until its busted in many pieces. Then turn your attention back to him and with the same soft whispering voice, say Honey if you dont start paying attention to me more then a fkng phone, im gonna do that same thing to you next. After the restraining order is off. Then go find someone your own age without a phone. Older guys like me are sometimes desperate for someone because there arent alot of good looking women our age so we will treat you better but then when the right guy your own age comes along youll break our heart. So follow my advice n i think youll be fine. Or invest in toys. 
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Aww don’t play your fiancé while you work your thoughts and feelings out… or the other guy. If you want to muck around, be single…
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Both consenting adults… nothing wrong with the age gap among adults. 
id say let your fiance know that your feelings have begun to fade and you’d like to end the relationship… pursue a man that will love you… your children as you deserve to be.
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Set your fiance free
He deserves someone who dosent see him as a maybe option
if you have to ask then you know
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drop the zero and get with the hero
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He’s predatory. Don’t do it. I know you think you’re all woke and mature, but you’ll understand when you’re his age. Dudes like that are low hanging fruit. You should def dump your fiancé tho. He’s emotionally unavailable
Your guy sucks. Sorry. Boot that one and go from there.
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Life is short I say go for it.
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As the saying goes, dump the zero and get with the hero!
Even though he’s 58 and my fiancé I’m finding out has a history of doing this to woman
What am I supposed to do when he’s constantly on his phone. I’m always asking him to put it down and talk to me. He never even asks for me to come over at all. I just want to be loved and to feel it. I feel like I’m in competition with his phone
I show him all the time and I get nothing in return. I also forgot to add that he’s still married to his ex wife and hasn’t done anything bout it to get it finalized nor has made any effort in divorcing her
I hope you’ve at least exhausted communication w your fiancé and given him time to make your situation better. It’s off to me that you hang out w another man and have him so close to your kids, esp w the age gap. Sounds like you have some flaws as well.
Pick the old guy…let phone boy hit the road…
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You are 25. That’s an adult. You are old enough to know your own mind and what you want. So choose the guy who makes you happy. So what if he is 58. Someday you too will be 58. Do you want it to be having happy memories of someone who made you happy or regrets for choosing a man who didn’t think you rated his attention?
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The fact that you are giving and accepting attention from another man means that your fiancé isn’t making you happy. Do the right thing and walk away with respect. Be alone for a while; and if you still like this guy when you feel you are ready to date again, then date him. Don’t date him now because you are very confused, and it wouldn’t be fair to him either to play with his emotions.
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Which face do you want to wake up to every morning for the rest of your life?
I can’t really word what I want to say without sounding mean. But to make it short if you’re not happy give him back his ring. I don’t think you’re ready for the type of commitment marriage brings I’m old school. Also you shouldn’t date the older man either, have fun for sure, but don’t date.
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I think you need to think what you really want and it obvious it isnt with you fiance.
But dont mean jump into this man with open arms things always look better when your currently unhappy
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Sounds like you’re already dating the 58 yo. I don’t see an issue with the age gap. You should be respectful and end it with the fiancé regardless of what happens with the other guy. That relationship is lacking something, sounds like communication but you will regret marrying him. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone that pays more attention to his phone than he does his family?
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Why do you have to pick either? Pick yourself and your happiness, kids deserve a happy momma and daddy. That being said, is the fiance their dad? How will you feel if you end things and he starts dating again? Maybe he wants out as well but does not know how to leave you and your kids.
Leave but don’t jump into another relationship right away.
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How long have you known the other guy? The grass is always greener when your outside of the box….
Please break up with your fiancé and take some time befor jumping right into a relationship with someone else. For your own mental/emotional health.
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You have to be wise, fine your partner don’t have time for you have you ever go to him and ask him why that attitude… remember if you go ahead with your friend mind you, you will still come back and complain that his not giving it to you the way you like you are 25,he58 common 
Yeah you cheated…so sounds more like your fiancé needs to leave you.If you were feeling this way you should have ended it before you started a whole new relationship…
Smh
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Dont judge by age? Lmao. What an idiot.
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Why are you engaged to someone your never barely around? Girl you need to break it off with both of them. Be single and find yourself before being in several relationships. How can you be engaged to someone your not even around much. Thats not engaged. You do understand marriage is being with 1 person everyday. Not occasionally.
My friend is 36, and her partner is 27 years older than her. They have a child together and are very happy. Choose happy.
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If you are not happy in a relationship tell him and try to improve it. But end a relationship before you get into another one.
Sounds to me you are cheating on your fiance. What are you doing visiting a male alot. Leave your fiance as he deserves to find someone who loves him and respects him. Stop making excuses for your behaviour
I was 24 and my old man was 48. Older men are better companion, seems your mind is already made up love.
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Grass is not greener on the other side, water your grass first
Talk to to him tell him how you feeling give him a chance to fix it before you make a mistake
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