Am I overreacting about this situation?

Backstory I babysit through the week in my home, one of the rules for the parents I work for is that I do not babysit on weekends. I never have and I never will, primarily because I do work a part-time job on Saturday and It leaves me with Sunday being the only day that I have the entire day to spend with my children on our own.

About 6 weeks ago I started babysitting for a new person, And despite knowing my boundaries every weekend she tries to get me to watch her children, The first few times I politely declined and reminded her why, The last few times I just give her a no and even then she attempts to try to manipulate my feelings by saying oh I’ll lose my job if I don’t go into work or oh I’d like to be able to go do something without my kids and I still tell her no. It’s gotten to the point where I’m going to quit watching her children for her because it bothers me that she continues to attempt to push my boundaries. Am I overreacting about this?

64 Likes

No you’re not overreacting. If she did it once it wouldn’t be a big deal but it’s literally every weekend. If it continues to happen I would tell her “(her name here), I don’t want to sound rude but you ask me this every weekend & every weekend it’s the same answer. I work on the weekends & also want a day for myself to relax. I’m sorry you might lose your job but this is a rule I’ve always had & you’ve known this. I feel like this rule isn’t being respected & as much as I enjoy spending the week with your littles, I will have to ask you to find a new sitter” What you ask for is not unreasonable & she needs to respect it. Stand your ground.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum.

No, you’re not overreacting. She knew your availability beforehand.

3 Likes

If you need to keep watching her kids during the week, just keep telling her, “no” on the weekends. Or… just don’t reply on the weekends.

Nope!! Not over reacting at all!! She’s needs to respect you

I would say I have to get things done myself. And you said you had a part time job on Saturday. Well say I will lose my job if I do watch your kid/kids.

2 Likes

Never feel bad for your own bounderies

10 Likes

You aren’t overreacting

No your not. Stick to your boundaries. Give her a warning. Tell her if she doesn’t stop asking she can find a new sitter.

I wouldn’t have put up with that tipe of behavior for that long. I would have dropped her long before now.
So, no. Your not overreacting.

1 Like

No youre not over reacting. You made yourself very clear. You dont need to explain your reasons . They are your rules and if she doesn’t like them she can find alternative childcare

2 Likes

I would’ve quit watching her kids weeks ago. She knew the boundary before hand and her trying to manipulate you is just wrong. You’re not overreacting.

3 Likes

It’s her responsibility to find a weekend babysitter… she needs to get her shit together and stop bothering you. Her life is not your problem.

Next time she asks, say politely if you ask for weekend care again knowing I don’t do weekend care, then you can kindly find weekly care Elsewhere. People need to understand crossing boundaries has consequences.

18 Likes

Red flag :triangular_flag_on_post: cut her off she will never respect your boundaries.

12 Likes

As her “what part of NO don’t you understand?”

Don’t bother engaging in that conversation. Just say " Have a great weekend, see you on Monday ".

3 Likes

No means no…you told her your business hours. I would have ONE final “meeting” and explain it again, and if she violates it then stop watching her kid(s).

1 Like

Nah, I either would be like look I’ve told you before i I do weekends find someone else for weekends or in general

I’d tell her 1 final time that you aren’t doing weekends anymore and if she asks again you will give her kids spot to someone else that understands that weekends are off limits.

3 Likes

Nope. You’re not over reacting at all.

You need to tell her no and don’t ask me this again or go find yourself another sitter. If she asks again give her however many weeks you are required to and tell her she needs to find another sitter. The nerve of some people

It’s your boundaries never tell her yes if you told her from the start and has never taken them on a weekend don’t do it hold firm

Not over reacting at all. In fact you handled it very well. If she keeps pushing you, you have every right to not watch her children. Especially if she is manipulating you. You’ve told her the reason why you won’t watch her children on the weekends, you didn’t even have to explain yourself. Being that you did and she STILL is asking, let’s me know what kind of person she is. I would definitely reconsider. If all the other parents can follow that stipulation she should too.

1 Like

Nope.
Quit under her. She’s selfish and doesn’t care.

I’d stop watching her kids. That’s so amazing you don’t watch kids on the weekends! Good for you!! She’s selfish and doesn’t care, id stop watching her kids.

Ignore her on the weekends or just say ill get back to u

Nope, I watch children thru out the week as well and do not do weekends! I spend time with my own child and husband on the weekends and dont want other peoples kids at my house 24/7. If she can not understand that and stop pushing you to watch her children then I would stop watching them all together. Ive dealt with a few mothers like this and I just parted ways with them. You are doing her a favor most likely by watching her children. She probably pays less than what a daycare would cost so if she can not respect you her ass needs to go.

3 strikes and she’s out. You’re not in the wrong here.

Isn’t it strange that when people test our boundaries we end up feeling bad and questioning ourselves? :thinking: Tell her “NO and if you ask again I will not keep her children at all!!!”

1 Like

No daycare is open on the weekends. Need to say no I work the weekend which u have but stress u will also loose ur job if u don’t go. Might be time to find another client.

Yep time to tell her your done if she asks again. Or triple the rate for Saturday :wink: just kidding. Sorry your dealing with this.

Not overreacting. I would be annoyed and probably cut contact.

1 Like

nope best thing is probably to let her go

1 Like

I wouldn’t do it on the weekends… my aunt was a state certified in home daycare… she has 13 kids… a lot of them would try n get her to watch them on weekends… they would offer her more money, or try to bribe her with beer that they would pack in the diaper bag etc… when the kids would be picked up the parents would be taking home the beer and my aunt would tell them that she has to follow state guidelines for her daycare. And that she needs her freedom to also!

2 Likes

No you have every right to your boundaries, they are yours and you put them there for a reason.

2 Likes

No. You told her from the beginning. I would just tell her to find someone else to babysit her children if she asks again.

4 Likes

Nope. I dont think so! Everyone is allowed to have boundries, and that is okay! If daycare for her is so needed on the weekends, she can find a second provider for the weekends!

1 Like

Nope, I would quit watching her children.

1 Like

You’re definitely not overreacting

3 Likes

Not even. That would make me super annoyed and honestly, 3rd times the charm with me. Yeah I get that it’s hard out here, but like. Instead of fighting boundaries, pay the daycare for that 1 day or literally find a 2nd babysitter. Also, kudos moming, working and babysitting. Lord knows that’s not easy :heart::heart:

2 Likes

Nope she’s stepping over boundaries. Either put her in her place or just tell her she has to find another sitter.

1 Like

Ya that’s not cool, especially the way she tries to manipulate you after you say no. Honestly I would give her one last crystal clear warning, tell her “When I started watching your children I made my boundaries very clear. If you cannot respect the boundaries I have put in place then I can longer watch your children.” And if she does it again then you know she just doesn’t give a shit and you stop watching her children but at least that way you know you tried your best and have nothing to feel bad about.

No. It’s exhausting to have someone constantly trying to manipulate you. You don’t need that energy

2 Likes

I would tell her that is your off time and if she continues to bother you she will need to find a new situation for her children.

1 Like

No, I’m required to work weekends and it’s hard finding childcare but I don’t have the luxury of asking the daycare to open on the weekends, I have no idea why weekend childcare is so hard to find, it must not be in high demand

1 Like

Im sorry…but it sounds like she needs to find their DADDY!!

2 Likes

Nope tell her to do one :joy: her kids her problem!

Not overreacting at all. I would give her one final warning stating very plainly, “I was very clear with my boundaries when I told you I will not babysit on weekends. You continuing to ask me to do so despite me being clear on this is crossing those boundaries. I really enjoy watching your children, however, if you ask me again to watch them on the weekends I will be discontinuing my childcare services.”.

Hopefully, that puts a stop to it, and if it doesn’t at least you gave her a very clear warning so that you can respectfully and professionally cut ties the next time she asks.

6 Likes

Nope you have every right to a break

Not at all, you already told her, she refuses to listen

No. You set healthy boundaries and you shouldn’t feel guilty for sticking to them. It wouldn’t hurt to remind her that she’s overstepping those boundaries and if she doesn’t stop then you are going to have to quit watching them during the week as well. I am proud of you for sticking to your boundaries. I wish more people did.

1 Like

Give her a talk snd it in writing! Telling her that should she decide to disrespect your stated rules she will be seeking a new sitter!

She chose you as a care provider knowing full well weekends weren’t an option. I would suggest to her that maybe this arrangement isn’t the right fit for her needs. Tell her to start looking for an alternative because it isn’t you

1 Like

I’d have a meeting with her and give her a final written warning that if she asks again, you will terminate her as a client.

2 Likes

Nah not overreacting

Id tell her to find another childcare provider you do not have to watch her kids at all

2 Likes

No. Stick to ur guns.

No you are not overreacting especially since you have made it clear that you cannot babysit on the weekends. You only get one day free as it is to spend with your family. I would talk to her one final time and explain that you have made this known from the beginning that you are not free to babysit on the weekends and if she keeps pushing you will have to tell her she needs to find care for her kids somewhere else.

2 Likes

You shouldnt even give her any explanation on your personal life. You offered your service monday-friday and thats how you work. Just tell her that this is your available time, if it isnt working for her you understand if she looks somewhere else, also make it clear that if she asks for weekend one more time you will have to terminate your contract and will not be able to watch her kids any longer from then on.

4 Likes

I would just tell her that if she continues to ask about the weekends which you aren’t going to do and have already said no to and the reason why multiple times then you wont be able to watch her kids anymore. So she can either stop asking and you continue to watch her kid during the week or she can just find someone else all together.

2 Likes

Nope, stick to your boundaries.

Nope. It could cost you your weekend job and also precious time with your kids and also take away from things you would like to do with out children. Maybe remind her that you watch her children so you have no time off and then yes I would consider not watching her children. We teach our children no means no why should it be any different with an adult.

NOT overreacting! I’m actually aggravated on your behalf!! Work/life balance is important. Her kids- her responsibility. Trying to make it yours is selfish, manipulative and just wrong. Stand your ground and then stop engaging the “requests”

Absolutely not, boundaries are set for a reason, anyone who tries to cross them especially numerous times like this she does not respect you so why should you. I would tell her she needs to find childcare elsewhere because you are no longer available to watch her kids

Nope. She knows and keeps overstepping. I’d stop watching her kids at all.

Hail no! Tell her ass you can find someone who pays you more so you’re not missing out. Don’t let her manipulate you. And tell her that these are her children, so they’re her responsibility. She gave up being able to go do shit without her kids when she had em.

No way! Give an inch she will take a mile!

1 Like

No, this type of person is exactly why boundaries are needed. You have to do what’s best for you

5 Likes

tell her that, i would…how annoying

No. You have to have time with your own children and your own life. I understand her position but she needs to try and find someone else. That’s her responsibility.

2 Likes

Nope… stick to your boundaries. If she wants someone for the weekend, she can find someone else that doesn’t mind🤷🏾‍♀️

2 Likes

I would have told the 1st time I told YOU no WEEKEND’s and I wouldn’t have watched them gatta be frim! :clap:t4::clap:t4::clap:t4:

No you are not over reacting. You should just drop her based off how inhumane she’s being. You’re a human, you get one day off a week that you can give to your kids… if she can’t understand that. Bye! You want money, not drama!

1 Like

It’s a job! As long as you told them your schedule at hire then they can’t expect you to come in!

1 Like

Stand your ground, you have every right to say no and you made this clear from the beginning. It may be best to give her a 2 well notice that she will need to make other arrangements.

3 Likes

No, good on you! Stand your ground

1 Like

Nope. And good for you for standing your ground

1 Like

I would of told her that your rates would be to expensive after the first time you had to explain to her that you don’t do weekends & if she she what’s the price I would of told her, well it’s $1000+ each child up front before you drop them off & tell her again this is why I don’t care for children on weekends because it’s expensive & most people can’t afford that…

4 Likes

Definitely tell her that you can’t watch her children anymore and she needs to find a new sitter that can sit on the days she needs. People like that stink!

4 Likes

No. Stick to your boundaries!

You should’ve written a contract with every parent you babysit for. Refer her to the contract she agreed to & signed. If she can’t respect your boundaries then yes quit sitting for her all together. I’d give her an end date & tell her why. She’ll try to manipulate you, because that’s who she is. Don’t let her. Put it in writing on paper & in text or email. If/when she drops them off after the date stay firm. If she leaves them call the cops & have them pick them up for abandonment. I’ve learned in life people will use as far as they can. When you don’t let them they will retailiate. Be prepared.

2 Likes

Write a contract and make her sign it, stating your work hours/boundaries

That girls never been told no lol I would not watch her kids no more.

Work around your kids times n don’t have kids if you wanna be free. She sounds like an ass! You are not over reacting

Over reacting… absolutely not!! This lady is definitely trying to take advantage of you … and when she says or id just like to have a day without my kids… well, im sure you would like a day to yourself as well as you watch your own kids and others throughout the week. She atleast gets her quiet time to and from work

When i was pregnant with my 1st, i was watching 3 demon children. They were awful, and stressed me out so much, i went into labor at 5.5 months. Kids dad worked with my dad and fiancee, my dad was basically his boss. After being rushed 3hrs in an ambulance and being told im on bedrest for the rest of my pregnancy, i called the guy and told him. He asked if i could ignore it and babysit because their mom left and hed have to quit, trying to make me feel like the asshole. Like no i almost lost my baby and you have 3, plus my doctor was in the room during this call. Wish i could have seen his face when the doctor kindly told him to fffff off

No you aren’t. Not in the slightest. If she just asked once it wouldn’t be a big deal but to continually try to push is just disrespectful. A lot of clients/employers do it unfortunately.

I’d move on only because resentment will build and eventually it’ll be a blow up. You’ve been firm and clear and she doesn’t care. Those people don’t really ever learn to respect boundaries.

If you like her otherwise, give a warning. Let her know you have been clear and if your available days no longer work for her needs she’ll need to find someone else.

Quit! She should not manipulate you like that. It’s her responsibility to find supplemental childcare for the weekend. You made your boundaries clear.

Bro quit if you want your easily replaced

You are not overreacting at all. No means no whatever the issue. The Mom understands what she’s been told but she just doesn’t want to understand. She just wants her own way. If she continues to push I as a person would definitely tell her to look elsewhere.

You are NEVER over reacting by KEEPING to your boundaries. Anyone else who says otherwise is trash. Boundries being broke or ignored intentionally is the biggest form of disrespect & selfishness.

You have every right to not watch her children so no quit watching her children

You are not overreacting at all. She is trying to minipulate you and being very rude. She can easily find another sitter for time that you are unable to watch the kids but isnt.