Am I Silly For Not Wanting To Attend The Wedding Of My Sister And My Ex-Boyfriend?

QUESTION:

"My sister ended up with my ex-boyfriend. They now how two kids together and are getting married. I’m so broken a sister could do that to me. I had a strong love for him. Would you think I’m silly? I don’t want to go to the wedding. Would you?"

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"Life is all about choices. Your sister chose to abandon “girl code,” or worse.. “sister code.” That was her decision. Now you get to make the choice to either swallow your feelings on the matter and be supportive or remove yourself from the equation altogether. Don’t let anyone guilt you into believing your feelings are irrational or tell you how you need to ‘get over it.’ You’re entitled to your feelings."

"My sister is dating my ex-husband. At first, I was extremely upset but she deserves to be happy and if he makes her happy, so be it.
I have a husband that I love and he loves me. I wish her and him both love and happiness."

"I agree with the few saying it’s a bit messed up. Just the thought of dating someone either of my sisters did, just seems wrong to me. (Especially if it were serious) isn’t that some sort of girl code?"

"Did he cheat on you with your sister? and if not, how much time was in between your break up & her picking up!"

"They have 2 kids together now. Why are you only voicing your opinion now that they’re getting married?"

"I wouldn’t even associate with my sister if she did this. You do know you can cut ties with your toxic family and still live life. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to."

"Your mental and emotional health is very important! If you don’t want to don’t go!"

"Depends on the circumstances how long were you broken up for before they got together for 1? his your ex for a reason? They have 2 kids together surely it’s been long enough to get over him or use to it that they are together. Weirdly enough my mum married 2 brothers separately obviously and everyone gets on fine. It can be done put your big girl knickers on and move on or 100% remove yourself from all of it."

"I can completely understand your feelings, but I think after all this time you need to let it go and wish them happiness. Bitterness isn’t attractive on anyone."

"He's an ex. I get you may still have some type of feelings for him. But have you tried expressing that to your sister before she got involved with him? I mean they got two kids together now. I feel like it's a little late to be getting upset personally. You don't have to go to the wedding and that is between you and your sister. But I would wish them well. I mean they are a family and obviously really want to be one. I am not trying to sound crappy. So, I apologize if I do. But I just really think this is something that should have been talked about way before the kids and stood firmly on it."

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