My bd and I have been together on and off for 5 years we have a beautiful daughter and I’m pregnant (38 weeks). Last year he got physical (Nov 2020) and I told him to stay w his mom and we can figure it out just needed the space the regroup (first mistake). We’ll fast forward we’re ok we fix things and then in April his mother decided to tell me about him cheating on me while he was staying w her and how she was hoping he’d be the other girl and leave me. A month later I found out he cheated on me with ANOTHWR girl and potentially had a baby on the way. Well I was already pregnant I broke up w him and he’s been very active in the pregnancy and w our daughter. Christmas they want all of us to go over (including me) so they can open the presents we got them. I don’t want to. I feel like there’s no need for me to be there especially after her little confession of how she’d hoped he’d leave me. And I also am the reason his family ever got gifts for birthdays and holidays and I didn’t get them a thing as that’s not my obligation and he didn’t because he never does.
I would not go! I would be mature and let your daughter go but there is no need for you to feel uncomfortable around people who hurt you
Just thank the mom and the other ladies for ridding you of such a nightmare of a man 
No you are not obligated to go…why put yourself through that.
No.this isn’t the way separation works you do things separate it also confuses any children involved. It also shows you taking orders from him which means even thou your not together hes still manipulating you and something you need to detach from its a step in separation that over time you get right.
No, you are pregnant, think of the stress being around her would cause. I wouldn’t step foot in her house.
Since Christmas was y’day you already decided without advice. For what’s it worth now my advise would be to send your daughter if you feel she’d be safe without you. If you think she wouldn’t be supervised or there will be drinking, drugs I would politely decline the invite. Remember you will be connected to these people forever. Your feelings are understandable but you need to try to make it somewhat pleasant for your sanity & your children’s sake.
Nope, I’d not go. You deserve respect and that’s not a respectful environment. If he would like to take your daughter by over I think that would be more than enough. You owe them nothing and if you don’t want to go, don’t let them decide for you.
Listen to your feelings.
Don’t blame u 4 feeling that way. If it were me I wouldn’t go.
No don’t go, you don’t have to subject yourself to their mistreatment. Hugs
To hell with all of them, including your boyfriend.
You dont have to go. You can let your daughter go be with dad if you want but you are not obligated
No I wouldn’t go if it was me I agree with Tina’s comment above x
I wouldn’t go but I would let your guys daughter go with Dad. You can coparent without being together. Eventually when custody gets established y’all will have to share holidays. Might as well start being civil now. It will show your kids that you love them and it Isn’t about you but them (kids).
She is a toxic mother, and please press charges for him hitting you!
This relationship was over the 1st he’s cheated. Leave him, It’s done and he will never change. He cheated already 3 times. That tells you he doesn’t care about you and his family
It says they want you to come over so they can open the presents you got them and since there aren’t any presents why bother. Sounds like they just want the gifts.
This whole family sounds toxic, I’d stay away from them and keep my child away too. The mom sounds like a real Shi* starter, u deserve better.
I agree with Jess stambaugh! But don’t go because you are pregnant, stress will and can make you miscarry and you don’t need that, neither does the baby.
I would immediately get full custody considering it seems toxic and since he got physical with you once.
I would let the kids go, but I wouldn’t be there. Hell with those people.
I’m not going that’s for sure.
Don’t ever put yourself in that position. Your feelings matter.
Why with all his drama etc. would you not be on birth control. You are never going to have a life you deserve because of him. He’ll be paying child support for years and your children will go without. Get a lawyer and be sure you get child support and full custody of children.
I’d take all of their shit back and get a refund🤷🏼♂️ keep your money.
What’s the question? If you don’t want to go, then don’t go. Y’all are broke up, this should be the easiest decision ever. As long as he’s a good dad to his daughter, let him take her and get used to how it’s going to be now that you’ve split.
Not you’re responsibility anymore. And the fact is, you already have your answer (you don’t want to go)
Keep your distance. Everything about him and this situation is toxic and dangerous.
Why do you even want to be with this loser. He will cheat again & he will put his hands on you again. Let him buy his own gifts! Sounds like a bad guy.
No way!! Stay home and enjoy your alone time. His mother pretty much condoned her son acting a fool…cheating and abuse seems to be ok where she comes from!! 
Get rid of that crap in your life and teach your kids how to find real love and maturity as they grow up!! 
Leave him. It’s already over. Work out visitation for the kids.
Nope fuck her into oblivion. Don’t teach the kids that fake shit is ok. You don’t have to be civil for anyone you don’t wanna be, and the kids should see you exercise that right.
Stay away cut all contact . Your bd needs to learn his place to. If it’s not pertaining to the child than don’t have the conversation.
I wouldn’t be with him. Baby or not!!! I’d put him on child support and call it a day!!! Life is to short to be bothered with all that mess
Don’t go. You don’t have to do what they want you to do anymore. I understand exactly how this has to be making you feel. I just did this last night and I let them know how I felt about it ahead of time. I did not go . I do hope that you found a way to have a good Christmas. Don’t settle, you be so much happier if you keep all the drama away from yourself
Create and stand firm on your boundaries
Why should you. Stay your sexy ass home.
Kick him into touch along with his mother and have a very happy healthy and prosperous new year your a strong woman you don’t need him xxgod bless
Kick him and his family to the curb, they have nothing to offer you and your babies!!!
No he never changed never go back to an abuser very very rarely do they change. And if they do they went into hardcore therapy specifically for abusers. Did he do that? No he screwed other women. Did you go into therapy as a victim of domestic abuse? Do not surround yourself with him and his enabling family. You need calm and love and laughter. And seriously get into therapy!
You already know what you need to do. I think you just needed to voice it out loud. Pack leave make a better life for you and ur family
That comment from his Mom would never leave my mind…I’d be done with her and make her wish come true… by leaving that player son of hers…
…thought this was from my narcissistic abuse recovery group. Wow. Girl. Get out.
I just couldn’t take the toxicity of all the drama. You’d be much happier and have piece of mind if you just started your own life…
Imediately get checked for std’s, then add things up-- abuse, lies, mother inlaw who inflicts, and the possiblity of any or all of this happening again, dont forget cheating is possible murder if they have unprotected sex
Keep your sanity and stay away
I’d have other commitments
All I see is drama he’s brought you and your babies set strong safe boundaries keep it just the kids, keep yourself out of it you stay away he didn’t change a thing he never will love
Take a train outta there & don’t leave a forwarding address.
Stay away from him and his family!
Why are you still with him?
I wouldn’t go over there. You owe that family nothing. And I would leave him. He sounds like a real pos. I only see heartache in your future with him.
Ditch him and the gang! They are UNDESERVING. His behavior is not going to ever change nor will his family’s. Get a real lawyer, not a law clerk. File for at least $400 a month child support. That extra bedroom is going to cost you alot for the next 18 years.
You need to get rid of him, he obviously doesn’t love you so why stay?
You need to toss him and his family I mean re read what you said cheated multiple times and also might have child on way would you want your daughter in a relationship with someone like that.
I wouldn’t be going. Put your foot down. Cut out toxic people.
Don’t do anything for his family and ditch him.
Unless your daughter asks you to go with her over there I wouldnt. If you haven’t all ready I would be getting a custody order and parenting plan so child support can be established and there won’t be any arguments later about who gets your child when. Stay strong and don’t look back. What’s done is done ,it’s time to move on for the sake of your children.
He cheated and created a child with someone else; there is no moving on from that. Go on with your life without him. Co-parent if he’s not a danger to your children that is, and leave it at that. Do not continue on with a relationship with someone who cheated multiple times and started another family in the process. No thanks.
U can do better than that.he will promise you the moon but you will never get anything but heartache take your baby and find a new life .Ask God to guide you he will.God bless you& your baby! 
What you allow will continue
A big no to even remotely stay associated to all the toxicity. It’s going to hurt you forever until u run for ur life. Make a good life for yourself and your children. God be with you
Run from them all as fast as you can. Cheating, with effort and both sides fighting for relationship I feel can recover but I don’t condone physical or even verbal abuse. No matter how long ago or if it was just one time. Nope nope nope.
I would stay away from over there and him. That whole family must be lacking in the brain department for his mom to tell you what she did. Build yourself a real life and don’t surround yourself with idiots!
Hes physically abusive… likely verbally abusive… his family wished ill will on your family… he cheated multiple times AND potentially has a baby on the way WHILE you’re pregnant!!! Did I get that right??? If so… I don’t see a reason to hold on:thinking:
It’s time for some self healing and self worth your daughter needs a strong mama! One that doesn’t stay in a shitty situation for a child she needs to see her mama not settle and see a happy healthy relationship within her mama and maybe one day someone else that treats her like a queen that you are 
Your story is so confusing he got physical the. You fixed things he went to stay with mom and you know things were said then mom lashes out on you look if you forgive him it’s not fair to not forgive them and start over By forgiving him your back in his family It is up to him to make you comfortable at xmas tell him to have your back park where you can leave if everyone is not nice
My suggestion is stay away. You need don’t that toxic energy around you. If my son ever cheated on one of his gfs while at my house I’d be up his keister. I don’t allow that. And I sure as heck even if I didn’t like his gf I would not ever say cruel things to her. I’d start custody and visitation proceedings before the baby is born. Write everything down whether good or bad. Judges need proof not hearsay
So many reasons to run as fast as you can from this man and his family. Good riddance!
Silly question, are you sure his mother us telling you the truth? It sounds to me that she’s just trying to cause trouble for her own reasons!
Dont get them anything he can bring the presents to yall
Huge red flags get out hes a loser pos
Girl, no. Don’t go to any of his family functions and definitely do NOT take him back. Dude is straight trash and so is his family. Hell his own mother told you he was cheating because she WANTED you to leave him for good. High conflict dude, high conflict momma, toxic ass family.
Don’t put yourself in ANY situation that you don’t want to be in 
Why do you women continue to have babies with these men?? If you think a baby is going to change then you are completely WRONG!!!
You aren’t family so don’t pretend to be and put on some fake show by going to Family Christmas. Get out on your own ASAP there are lots of programs to help pregnant or moms with newborns. You don’t need this abusive cheater and his family.
OK this may be an unpopular opinion, but you need to think about your child and not yourself, my boys dad and I were on very bad terms, like police/court/orders bad, but I still went to his parents Christmas, for my son, he wanted to spend his day with mummy and daddy, so we put aside our differences and made his day special, to show him, that although his father and I aren’t together, we will put him first, he had the best day, we did not want to split the day if we didn’t need to, one was lunch and one was dinner, so we all went to both.
Ok what’s the question?
One Word Child Support