I went in for an ultrasound to see if my baby had a heart defect because my son has one, I needed support, I got told “he can’t be with you, it’ll be a fun ultrasound! You’ll get to see the baby and get fun pictures!”. That’s not what I was there for. I cried the entire time because I wasn’t scared of the diagnosis with him there but when he left I felt alone and scared. I get there are COVID protocols but your partner should be able to accompany you to appointments and ultrasounds. I feel its poor patient care to not allow support.
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I just had our fourth in July. Hubby wasn’t allowed to come to the appointments for most of the pregnancy. It sucked, but it is what it is.
I am 33 weeks and have done all of my appointments alone this time. No easy. And I feel like my husband is missing out. But I know he will be there for a birth. Just take it one appointment at a time. Maybe you can video chat during the ultrasound?
I’m in the same boat… I’m 19 weeks and 1 day as of today… I hate that I have to go through everything alone cuz it scares the bejeezus outta me… But thankfully I am allowed to video call my husband when I have my ultrasounds and during my dr appointments…
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I just had my baby girl in October, and my husband was not allowed at any OB appointments. We did video chat, but it just wasn’t the same. Thankfully, he was able to be in the OR when I delivered her
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I have been to all my appointments alone. My doctor let’s me video call him during. As far as the ultrasound I just go to an actual ultrasound place and they allow my husband.
Stay positive.
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I found out I was pregnant April 5th 2020 gave birth 12/4/2020 went through all appointments alone. Only 3 times hubby was allowed in with me was when I had to go to Labor and Delivery ER… I hated it, but you are not alone
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I have horrible anxiety. Had to spend 4 days in the hospital due to low sodium and seizures and he couldn’t come with me at all.
Then was sent for an EEG which was horrible anxiety. All alone. He stayed on the phone with me the whole time until it was time for testing. Maybe you guys can do that so he can hear everything the dr says and the babies heart beat. Best wishes.
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Been doing this as I’m. Also expecting my 3rd and I’m. Doing everything alone and we are having complications in this pregnancy it is the hardest thing to go thru but in my 2nd pregnancy we also had complications and my partner was there thru everything but now again he can’t even be part of it only sometimes they let face time
I’m also 20 weeks, and my husband is allowed at every appt as long as he also wears a mask. I’d be panicking too honestly. This pregnancy has been a roller coaster and I need him. I’m high risk, and since I’ve had a stroke I forget things. He makes sure he gets all the info we need from the doctor and always asks questions. If something happens he can make quick decisions. Perhaps see if other OBs in your area have different rules.
I don’t want to scare you but I have both of those things happen. We found out we lost the baby when I was alone at my appointment. It was a horrible experience and wouldn’t wish finding out news like that alone. Now pregnant with my rainbow baby and again doing all sonograms alone. I was terrified of my first one just praying the baby had a heartbeat. It sucks so bad that my husband can’t be with me for them at all. I wish you good luck during your pregnancy! 
He can wait in the car. You can even have him on the phone during the appointment. Not ideal, but at least he will be easy to access if something is wrong.
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Yup same here pregnant with number 3 well technically 4 (I kissed carried my daughters twin at 12 weeks) pregnancy number two and I have an appointment tomorrow as well I went to all the previous ones alone they allow me to FaceTime my husband but that’s it. It’s rough because he has to take work off to take me because I can’t bring our two year old in with me either
I went to my second child’s alone and it was hard as they found a spot on her heart. I was so upset I called him from the car crying. Luckily it was not a big deal and she is a totally healthy 5 year old. It’s hard but just make sure u can get ahold of him if u need support. We already new the gender at the time as we had the blood test for that.
I am 27 weeks and I have been to every appointment alone except the anatomy scan i am 37 years old with my 2nd so I am considered high risk.
My daughter is type 1 diabetic and pregnant for the first time and also can’t have anyone accompany her for any appointments. She video chats him in for them though so there’s that.
I dealt with this last year when I had my daughter in the middle of lockdown. She was not planned and a total surprise for us. I had some complications during the pregnancy that made me go in about 6 times starting at about 33 weeks, they delivered her at 37 be ause of said complications. I even had to stay overnight because my bp was so high and he still couldn’t come in. I ended up video calling him. It helped alot. It can be very hard, but you got this.
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Your normal check ups no one with you but the ultrasound the first one yes he can go he will have to wait in a different waiting room and then leave right afterwards out in the car or in the hallway just had mine in November so I just went thru it
My bf can’t be a part of ultrasounds either. It’s scary, but today we went to a local place thats unaffiliated with the hospital they did ultrasounds for US he got to be there and it was worth every penny!!!
Sweetheart, you sound like my daughter. She had to go to the appointments alone, too. She also has anxiety. YOU CAN DO THIS if only because you must. I’m not saying it’s easy, wasn’t for my daughter either but, trust me… YOU GOT THIS! I’m keeping you & your family in my prayers. Just believe. 
My son was born in June when the pandemic was fairly new and they were constantly changing the visitor rules. He did get to go to the first ultrasound but that was before it all started. He was left out of everything after that. It sucked but I understood it since I had family die from covid. I was extremely high risk and at one point I was going to the doctor twice a week. I ended up in the hospital at 34 weeks and almost died and he wasn’t allowed to be there unless I was in labor. They told me they might have to keep me until I deliver and it stressed me out so much that a few days later, my water broke. Luckily he was allowed to be there once that happened but then we were stuck in my room for 3 days and unable to leave. It’s a hell of a time to have a baby. It sucks and it’s stressful but it’s necessary unfortunately.
I just had my baby in November and my fiancé was allowed to only go to ultrasounds. I was only allowed my fiancé during delivery. Everyone else who wanted to see the baby when I was in the hospital they had to go to the wibdow
I am 32 weeks, this is my first baby, my husband’s first boy, I am high risk, and he has not been able to come to a single appointment. It can be hard, it can be scary, but it shows how strong we all are for pushing through it!
Unless the appointment is WITH a doctor, the tech won’t be able to tell you anything they find. If possible can you FaceTime/Duo with him during to help keep you calm?
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Yes. I got pregnant last january with my husbands first child. He wasnt at any of the appointments and he was so disappointed
He can wait outside for you in the car. You will be fine. I’m 30 weeks pregnant and my husband (separated) hasn’t come to one of my appointments and he can.
I am 39 weeks and my husband couldn’t go to any appointments… at this point I’m just happy he can be there for the birth.
Good luck and prayers for a healthy pregnancy.
This is just sad. I’m thankful to work in an office where dads are allowed to be apart of the journey.
Pray. Let God be your Peace and Comforter, expect a good report and trust Him. "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 
Amen
I’m currently 6mo pregnant and my husband hasn’t been allowed at a single one. Just try to remember it is for the safety of the pregnant women. I know it’s hard and different for sure, but pregnant women are in that high risk category 
I found out twice that my baby had no heartbeat because my husband had work, your a grown up, you’ll be fine.
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Would you be able to possibly FaceTime him while they are doing the ultrasound? I know thats not him there but its something!
My grandson and his wife just had a new baby Monday January 4, she and baby had to go back to doctor today. He had to set in the car. He was not allowed in. Cleveland, Tennessee
I’ve seen husbands take their SO to OB appointments but not go in the room. As for the actual ultrasounds no they don’t let anyone else there. It’s hard I know but you can request video call s every visit I can’t see why the would refuse
It’s been like that since March down here in South Florida. Only the patient is allowed in. I had to take my son for his annual and I didn’t have anyone to watch my 2 years old the appointment had to be rescheduled. .
FaceTime or skype him during your appt so he is there for support.
I would ask doctor if can do a video call at the very least so that he can be there in a way.
you may be able to have a doctor or therapist state that for your peace of mind he needs to be there. Being anxious is a lot of stress on the baby.
My husband is allowed to go but wait in waiting room only one person in room which is me
Unfortunately, its the world/reality we live in today. Facetime with him. I know its not the same…but its better than nothing. Best of luck to you!!
My whole pregnancy so far ! Not even children allowed. So frustrating but due to COVID19
I went to all my appts alone !! My son was born in Dec , its for safety seasons.
Can you FaceTime? That’s what I had to do for all my ultrasounds last year
You will be fine just be thankful thus far you have a healthy pregnancy.
Easy. Change doctors. Find one who includes both parents.
Zoom, Facetime, call him. If you can’t have his body near you, his voice is better than nothing…
They let me duo call my husband but wouldn’t let him go in until delivery
My husband gets to go to my ultrasounds but it’s because we are in rural Oklahoma. Maybe try going to a smaller doctor?
I had to go to all of mine alone, the exception was pre-covid and it was to make sure baby was viable and okay and that was at 6 weeks
I just had a baby the end of November and the big appointment like the candy ultrasound my husband would come with and wait in the car and I would face time him during the appointment so he could be involved and ask questions and it work pretty well for us I know it not the same as being there in person but it something
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Im in nc they let my fiance come for the ultrasound appts and if at any time i go into the hospital he can be there
Use a midwife. Or find a better doctor. He shouldn’t be kept from supporting you at a doctor visit.
My husband would wait in the car when I went to my appointments with my midwives and my ultrasound appointments. During those times I would text him. I was lucky that both my midwives and ultrasound technician made me feel comfortable during those visits. I was just happy he was obviously allowed into the hospital for when our son was born.
I was pregnant during the first lockdown and had to so all scans and appointments by myself. I had my other half waiting outside after my scans so he could be the first one I told whether it be good and bad. You’ll find in tones like this your more resilient and you’ll be fine honest.
You could always FaceTime him, I know it’s not the same but it’s something
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FaceTime! There’s absolutely 0 reason for the father to not be allowed! I disagree with this call completely.
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Request if you can video chat with your husband during the ultrasound, even if you have to wait until after the initial examination where they’re quietly checking everything for the Dr to look over.
Or if they won’t allow it, be sneaky & fore warn your husband to be quiet while he listens over the phone lol
My doctors office allowed spouse for ultrasounds only
My husband was sick with cancer and in the hospital when i was getting my ultrasound…so we called him so we would find out together. Back then we didnt have face time
Do a video chat so he is there in the best way that’s available at this time.
I had to go to all of my appointments alone after covid happened. My fiance came to the first 2 but then things got bad and I had to go alone. Just how it is sadly… its unfortunate but things are crazy right now.
Facetime was my saving grace.
it’s just covid protocol. try FaceTime
My father has had multiple strokes in the past few months and they try and keep my mom from going with him. He doesnt understand, has a hard time walking etc. His mental capacity not all there. My mom needs to hear what is said and be informed. Having a really hard time. Both my parents are elderly. This is way out of control!
What’s the question she was rambling I got lost hell:roll_eyes:
. Sorry but I did
Military spouses have been going it alone for years.
Maybe try a private sonogram office.
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A lot has to do w COVID.
2¢
Maybe consider NOT doing a gender reveal thing.
With COVID only patients are allowed.
My ex never went with me until we had a problem with #2. Never went with #3
Video chat him during
Do a face time or FB messenger video call
Suck it up. He can’t labor for you either
Yeah like every husband with a pregnant wife. Its called COVID and it sucks. FaceTime or Duo
I am 19 weeks pregnant with my 3rd (and last) and with my previous two pregnancies my husband missed out alot and I had to do appointments and all that alone as he worked long hours and too far from home to be able to come with me most of the time. This time we were so excited as he has been working from home since March 2020 with a more flexible schedule. All was fine until November and now he is no longer allowed to be with me for any appointments 
I have also been quite sick this pregnancy so far, so battle to drive alone and all that too. Definitely is making things extremely difficult and stressful. This has also made me so scared that things wont be better yet in May and that he wont be allowed during the delivery. I am heartbroken and terrified. Fkn pandemic 
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Bs but that’s what Biden and staff wants. So they can make money, they can’t take with when they die. Mfers
Alright y’all…I’m reading all the comments which I shouldn’t have because I knew they would drive me crazy but here I am…
I’m a perinatal RN, I work high risk OB clinic with patients that have known problems with themselves and/or baby. The current visitor situation sucks, I agree. Our facility/clinic allows 0 visitors in for USs/appointments right now as well (especially since our clinic also sees newborns/pedi patients, they’re being extra cautious).
However, we do accommodate FaceTime/ZOOM/speakerphone etc during visits including ultrasounds which was previously not allowed.
It’s not ideal I agree, but this maybe the best that can be done.
To those of you just saying “switch doctors” or “get a note from your doctor/therapist” to allow him to come, it’s not that easy. You can try switching docs but most facilities currently have the same rules in place right now due to COVID. And if it was as simple as saying you need “emotional support” in a note, trust me EVERY patient would be allowed to have a visitor.
I truly wish the OP the best and hope she is at least able to electronically communicate during the visit (if that’s a no-go, then it might be worth it to explore being seen elsewhere) but everyone please understand it is for the safety and protection of EVERY patient. Overall, please, regardless of what you do DO NOT ream the clinic staff (providers, nurses, techs etc) over the visitor policy. Trust us, we would change it if it was safe and we could (as a nurse, I never expected to have to be the person holding a patient after she was told her baby no longer had a heartbeat and collapsed into sobs when her husband should be there for her instead of nurse she’s never met) but this is unfortunately the situation we are in. many of us fight tooth and nail for patients experiencing potential losses to have emotional support present, but we don’t always win that fight. I am truly sorry many of you and your partners are being robbed of the comprehensive prenatal appt experience, but providers and facilities are trying to keep everyone safe.
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This happened 13 years ago, but I drove myself to an appointment for an ultrasound. It was a extra ultrasound because the first one showed a gestational sac (we were taking fertility drugs) but it also showed a cyst in my uterus. They did an extra ultrasound 2 weeks later to make sure rhe cyst had dissolved. My husband couldn’t go with me and I expected nothing so I went by myself. The ultrasound showed the cyst was actually not a cyst it was a twin. But the doctor said the other baby had no heartbeat. My husband wasn’t there and I was devastated. I just found out I was pregnant with twins and one was gone all in rhe same moment. I don’t know how but I held it together til I made it to my car. I screamed and cried for 30 minutes before I could drive home to my husband. The worse part of the whole situation was having to tell my husband we had lost a child we didn’t even know we had. We were only a month or so into the pregnancy. It was horrible. They had told me that since it was so early the deceased twin would be absorbed, but they scheduled another ultrasound in 1.5 weeks to make sure it absorbed completely. My husband went with me to that appointment and when they placed that wand on my belly I had a weird feeling of peace. Then I saw it. The deceased baby hadn’t absorbed it had grown. I was carrying 2 babies both healthy and very much alive. Today, I am the mother of 13 year old twins. So while it wasn’t covid that made him not be able to attend it was still a horrible time in my life, I had no one to lean on for support so I know what that feels like. But the worse part was having to tell my husband the terrible news. Doctors are trained to deliver terrible news but I wasn’t ready to have to do that, and I certainly wasn’t ready to support him when I wasn’t even okay myself. My only comfort I can give is that most rhe time everything is totally fine.
Im having my 4th in may. With my 1st my ex came to appts. We wete young he Didnt work. My husbamd now never really came any of our other 2 amd theyre turning 5 and 2. So for me im ok with it. My anxiety goes up. Had a misscarriage in January of 2018. But than had my rainbow baby and now this one. But he has to watch our kids… I still dont agree with not allowing the option to have your support person there. It would be nice to have him come once in awhile. What makes it hard with covid is working around his work schedule. Have had to cancel appts bc my 2 youngest cant come. Good luck!
I went to most of my appointments alone. I had an anatomy scan at 20weeks. My mom went with me, not my SO. They didn’t say anything during the appointment about any type of abnormalities. I went home for about an hour and shared the exciting news of healthy, weight, length ect. They told me things looked great!! On my drive to work my OB called and said there were some abnormalities they spotted and wanted me to return to the office to discuss them (they were concerned with DS due to having multiple markers). So even though I had my Mom with me at the appointment, I still received the news while I was alone and driving at that!! All I am saying is that, you can not let the fear or nervousness of the unknown stop you from enjoying the appointment. Maybe you can FaceTime your husband while they are doing the scan so he can still “be with you” to the extent the office allows. Congratulations and best of luck!!
My daughters baby daddy was not allowed at none of her appts. He was only at the 3D/4D and the birth of their son almost 2 months ago. She could record the hearbeat checks but not the normal ultrasound appts nor could she facetime anyone. It was ridiculous.
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I say that since it’s your appointment you can FaceTime, Zoom, Skype or whatever video chat program you have and use them while at your appointment. These are new regulations in place because of COVID.
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I have panic attacks and my husband is the one that calms me down. And it gets hard because he’s military so he has training and deployments… But maybe to ease your worries… Call him. Have him on speaker phone, let him hear what’s going on so he can comfort you. FaceTime as well.
I was pregnant through the first lockdown had baby in October. My husband wasn’t allowed to any scans or appointments I had a c section and he was asked to leave about half hour after baby was born.
I had to do it alone because we had my oldest with us and they both couldn’t come back at the same time. When I was giving birth to my first I had probably a good 20 people in the room with me, mostly female family members and nurses, my man and my doctor wasnt even in there. Not to mention my cousin and his son and my step dad decided to all stick there heads in while the baby was crowning. Idk about y’all but I’m looking forward to giving birth in solitude. That shit made me nervous as hell and I think it may have been some of the reason why I had to have a c section. My anxiety alone is enough to kill a bird from a heart attack. This time it will be different regardless.
Yep you have to go alone and you will have to find a babysitter when you go in for your 6 week postpartum appointment because you won’t be able to bring the baby with you. I had surgery and had to spend 3 days in the hospital alone. Fucking stupid
My son and his gf had a baby in 2020. He was not allowed in some appointments. Also, my grandson was born at 27 weeks. Stayed in the NICU in Spokane until September. They had to go in sperate to see him. No other visitors due to covid.
So, you are not alone. People are being cautious for yours and baby sake❤
I would try to find a different doctor to be honest. My Doctor only allows the dads to be there for the ultrasounds appointments (im 29 weeks currently). Im not sure if zoom calls or videos will be allowed since they ask for no videos and such in the ultrasound room. I like the shirt idea that lynn suggested.
Tell them he’s your caregiver they can’t say no!
If you get your ultrasound done at a 3rd party facility, you have better odds of your husband being able to be present. That’s what we did. The hospital wouldn’t allow him so I got mine done at an Imaging Center (they sent the results to my dr) and not only was he able to be there, but my 3 year old was too. Not to mention, having it done at an outside facility instead of the hospital saved us quite a bit of $$$. The same service done at a hospital is at least double the cost of having it done at an independent company.
I’m so sorry you have to go through it alone. Here in FL my husband can’t go to my appts with me but is allowed for ultrasounds. This is the first pregnancy he’s been able to come with me (work, our other kids). I went through the first 3 alone except at birth. Try not to worry yourself too much. I know it’s easier said than done but just pray. I wish you the best of luck. 
I don’t have any suggestions but my heart goes out to you, I’m sorry, what a hard time for every pregnant person at this time
I had my baby 7 weeks ago and my husband couldn’t go to a single doctors appointment. He was able to go to ultrasounds.
But I was high risk.
Can u video chat him
You can do this. Tell your anxiety to take a back seat. You got this! Stay strong. Nothing is wrong, think positive. You will tell him great news!!
Cindy its na Gary the weather is nice in the day. Were in the desert at night the temp goes down in20’s and 30’s and its cold thus we need heat anyway the turns e is fixed and the house is warm:heart:
I know it’s not the same, but surely he can drive you and wait in the car? At least he will be right there if you wanted to literally run to him xx
When I had my children 40 plus years ago, my husband never went to one appointment. He did sit at the hospital during the delivery and wasn’t allowed to come in the delivery room.
Curious… even though it still isnt the same, why not have him still come to the appt and be in the car or lobby? If bad news happens and they allow an exception he can come up.
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