Anyones toddler need you to be in their room at bedtime?

Does anyone deal with their toddler needing you to be in their bedroom for when they go to sleep at night? This has been going on for a year now and I’m trying to break it. Everyone I try and walk out before he’s asleep he literally has a full on meltdown with a panic attack. Please help, TIA mommas

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Figure out what he is actually afraid of and deal with that. My son felt safe in my bedroom. For years he went to sleep in my bed and I moved him to his when I went to bed. The deal was he had to stay in the bed. For almost a year he was up and down for a couple hours. I finally figured out that he wanted to start in my bed because he felt safer. Ask your son a bunch of questions and listen to his answers.

I slept in a crib and on the floor, freezing nightly for 2 years, hes now 20 and i miss him needing me, i swear u will blink and they are 20 and u just want that back because life made sense then. Love that baby a little longer

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So just sit there untill hes asleep. One day youll yearn for that moment. My 2 year old will follow me any where to sit/lay with me when he gets tired at night. So i lay on the couch with him untill he falls alseep. Heres a funny picture of the way he fell asleep. He had his head on my leg originally

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My 5 year old still needs momma to go to sleep. It’s annoying and exhausting but I would rather her feel safe enough to go to sleep comfortably versus having a meltdown and it be 10xs worse on both of us. My 8 yr old didn’t sleep alone till he was around 6 some nights he still needs momma cuddles but I’m okay with that.

This is pretty normal. It’s annoying and exhausting, I get it. But your little one will only be little for so long as another commenter stated. I went thru this with 2 of my children. My 2 youngest are not like this, but they are clingy in other ways.

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Sounds like separation anxiety, I get it’s annoying but they aren’t toddlers for long and he clearly needs you atm. It’s normal. Children this young aren’t supposed to be separated. I’ve had 4 11, 10, 6 years and 4 month old.

They don’t get clingy and have issues as they get older if be there. He will grow out of it just encourage independence and it’ll seep into sleep :blush:

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Not uncommon. If you want an ease in to it approach, put little one in their bed and sit down n read a story. Then tell them you need to go get something, walk out and come back. Do this every night. Every few days, take an extra minute or two before you come back, keep adding extra time as you go along. They’ll eventually understand that you’ll still come back but they do need to stay in their bed.
My first born went through a short period of thing between 2 and 3. This worked really well for her. My middle child around 4 suddenly got scared at night and it was far more challenging but we got there.

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Yes, my youngest had terrible separation anxiety, I had to be with him for him to go to sleep for years. I used to be a nanny and had another child, I was able to get all of them into a great sleeping routine, but, some babies just need more contact than others.

My son did, then I helped him trade me for our dog, and now he’s in there alone. He has nightmares about the power going off :woman_shrugging:t2:, I sleep on the couch with him when it happens.

He’s a toddler not a teenager.
Sit down, rub his back, read him a story or 3 and wait for him to fall asleep. You’ll be teaching him he’s safe with you and he’s ok. You can even check his room at night, ya know, look in the closet, under the bed, in his drawers, make sure no “monsters” are hiding. Show him he’s safe. He will put grow this stage. He’s figuring out he is seperate from you and it’s weird. They don’t always get it.
I told mine as I rubbed their head and back, “Dream about bunnies and horses playing with you” (pick whatever he likes, my son liked Cars, daughter liked animals.)
Don’t be in a rush for him to sleep without needing you.

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What does the pediatrician ssy

My 7 year old needs me to lie with him to go to sleep. It’s also the time we connect the most about his day. He tells me about the good and the bad, it’s the time he opens up the most to me. I’ll keep lying with him as long as he needs me to because it’s simply that, he needs me to. He’s anxious about the dark, he’s worried about being alone. He has a night light, he has a bedtime routine, the same one everynight, but he still needs his mum. It won’t last forever and when it’s over, I’ll want it back.

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One day you’re going to miss these moment. One day… but for now I would make a deal, I’ll read you a book and rub your back but when the book is over it’s bedtime and you leave the room. You have to set boundaries as a parent or your children will walk all over you. However if your child has any trauma’s that could be the reason for the panic attacks and freak outs. Ever ask why the freak outs?

I promise u , u r going to miss this

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Still laying down with my 4 yr old. Her older sister never her this issue but now they’re both used to it since they share a room. Trying to break it but also sucking it all in because it won’t last.

my sister had this issue with my nephew. she admitted it was a horrible habit she started (and regretted).

finally she just had to learn to ignore the temper tantrum.

i know some people get their kids like a special night light (it’ll show things like the stars on the ceiling), have white noise playing, super soft music, or even just random podcasts playing (there’s several that read children’s books).

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Iv just given in now and accepted I need to lay with them untill they fall asleep x

All of my kids do this to some extent to this day. It’s normal and it teaches your child that they can rely on you in their most vulnerable moments. My oldest ones are both 22 and we text each or have phone conversations or well we don’t talk much more so listen to each other breath lol. My 3rd oldest will FaceTime me and it’s gotten more frequent bc she is expecting a little one herself. She’ll be 21 on the 19th February this year and she is engaged to get married in October of this year as well. So she has been craving more of my attention bc she feels vulnerable during her pregnancy. Then I have my 17y/o an she will come lay in my bed for awhile and sometimes she falls asleep for a little while and sometimes she just lays with me. She has always been attached to me like glue and even more so after my 5th daughter passed away. She kind of became my comforter as she was still a baby at the time too. Then there’s my surprise baby my youngest daughter. She slept in my room from the time she came home from the nicu at 2 months old till 5yrs ago when she became more independent and ended up sharing a room with the now 17 y/o sister. She does similar to the 17y/o but she is the most independent one out of all of them so she doesn’t do it as often. She was premature and has cerebral palsy but she is the most independent child. She is 13 and she is also the one we call the mean one since she tends to say things that are typically things you wouldn’t/shouldn’t say out loud lol but she’s also the one who doesn’t sugar coat anything either. So yeah all of my kids still have me I. Some shape or form be present for them to sleep even if it’s just a cat nap. It’s very normal and you should really enjoy the moments you get with them as they’re only little ones for a short time.

My son it’s almost five and sleeps with me. I already tried Everything. This or 3 months of sleepless nights bc he’s awake every hour. I tried really cool expensive beds, room sprays, lights, books toys, stay with him, lay with him, pat his back, EVERYTHING.

Trust me don’t whinge about things like this because one day poof they’re teenagers and don’t want anything to do with you. Put him in your room. There will be a time where he will want his own space.

I put a baby gate up and leave their door open until they fall asleep then take it down

It’s ok enjoy … they grow so fast and soon she won’t be needing you like that… in my country Africa kids sleep with there parents till 7-8 nothing wrong with kids afterwards… enjoy the moments mama it’s ok

That’s why for my kids up until they’re 4 I put a bed in my room for them it’s more comforting for them and just easier to transition then it starts with them usually in my bed then they transition to their own bed and then they stay in their own room eventually they’ll get there it’s a slow process I just got it to where my almost 5 year old sleeps on her own but she has to have a night light and a bunch of little things beforehand

My 2nd born son needed this wen he got to around 3 he was fine and then just ended up coming in 2 my bed every night early hours which was better than than laying with him for hours he’s nearly 6 and still needs mummy at nyt x

Yep I lay with them in their bed until they fall asleep

Aww I love laying with my son! He’s 4 and I used to lay next to his crib on the floor holding his hand through the slats until he fell asleep. Now he has a twin bed and he still wants me to lay with him every night until he falls asleep :slight_smile: I love hearing his little breathing as he’s sleeping and just having time with him. I know one day he won’t want that anymore so honestly I soak up as much as I can :heart:

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I’ve always layed with my kids when they were toddlers in their beds until they fell asleep. They always knew if they woke up they could come into my room the rest of the night. Their only little once and these days go by to fast❤️ I would never be able to let my kids cry themselves to sleep knowing the one thing they comfort is having mommy/daddy by them.

My son had a lot of issues with bedtime when he started school. I know not the same age but he would freak out so bad he would cry and make himself puke. It broke my heart. We started a bedtime routine for him to look forward to. Every night (except for a few busy ones) I lay down with him for about a half hour and we watch videos on my phone and snuggle together. He loves our special time and falls asleep happy. He also prefers several night lights because he doesn’t like the darkness. It is harder when they are so young and cannot tell you what they need. I wish you the best of luck! My son also sleeps with lots of blankets and “stuffies” to help him feel comforted :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

yaaaa my youngest is like this i lay with her till she falls asleep. all my kids were like this till about 4-5yrs

No advice, but our toddler sleeps in our bed because it’s just easier. I would lie with her in her bed til she fell asleep and as soon as I left the room she’d still wake up :joy:.

Is it really going to kill you to lay with your toddler until they fall asleep!? I did this with both of my kids. They are special moments. So many people just try to rush their kids through being a young child. You should enjoy this time because eventually they won’t want you near them.