How many times is to many for telling your spouse you don’t like something they are doing? When do you decide enough is enough? At what point do you decide they are choosing what they are doing over your family? (Drinking)
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Run! It doesn’t get better. Speaking from almost 30 years experience.
If they cared about you, your feelings or your family, they would listen to your concerns and be willing to work towards a compromise. If they’re not willing, it’s time to go.
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I see myself in so many of these statements.
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Took me 10 years with my first husband… Don’t wait that long is my best advice.
If you’re having to ask, you already know it’s time to walk away. Sending you love and strength. 🫶🏻
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Everyone’s breaking point is different. You will know when you are ready and it is time.
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I got out as soon as I became scared. He grew violent in nature. My son and I left. He blows off our son more than he sees him. It breaks my heart. We were married 7 years and i lost so much staying that long
When you ask yourself this question
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Things are not going to change unless you change them. Why would they stop if they see nothing ever happens. They can just keep doing it and you will stick around. It’s up to you but if you want things to be different you need to put yourself first.
As a recovering alcoholic we don’t care about anyone or anything except our booze. It’s a disease we have to live with everyday. We are selfish. He has to want to get help no one can help him except himself. Never lose hope but do what you have to for you. Luckily my husband stood by my side and I have been sober for 4 years, it’s a battle but so worth it! Prayers for you and your family
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You know when you ask strangers, that’s when you leave.
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You coming to ask was the first step , next is making a plan for you and the kids future on your own. 
Are you better off WITH him or WITHOUT him
When you realize that it’s jeopardizing you, your children, and your home, and the spouse has been told over and over again, you need to walk away, if only to protect the kids and let the spouse realize that they need help and actually get the help that they need.
Honestly it’s up to you. I knew it was time to walk away from my ex when one day I just didn’t want to go home at all after work. Now my husband has had serious issues with alcohol and it took us getting to the root of his drinking and attitude for things to change but he put in effort to change and it still took several years but I stuck through it because I never stopped loving him and still always wanted him around. Things between us are better than ever now
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If you’re asking this question then answer is it’s been enough times
I gave my kids father a chance after chance to get his life in order I went and got my own house he knows I’m leaving I move out the 28th of this month enough is enough
Tomorrow it is our 50 year anniversary… It was not so bad in the beginning. but it has gotten worse. I stuck it out because there was allways something that held me back. He is an alcoholic and he is not going to change now. For me it is ro late to say enough so if you can walk out just do it otherwise it will be he’ll on earth. Good luck
So sorry you’re going through this momma. From what I’ve heard from my husbands mother they told her husband enough and threatened to divorce over it…my mother was an alcoholic and it took her losing her kids to CPS (due to another issue) but my mom got sober after that. 
The time is now…when you recognize it’s something that is not going to change. You have to protect yourself.
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If your asking, its probably time, when I was in a similar situation, when I asked, it was time, was in the relationship for 18 years, the last 3 were the reasons why he had to go, best of luck to you, God bless
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You will know when the time is right. Basically when the live is gone and you have no respect for the person.
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It took me years. And even leaving had a major impact on the kids. If you have children look for guidance before you leave I am only saying that from the very difficult time I had. I had no guidance and it was a huge struggle for me and the kids.
The point where you ask that question. That’s when it’s time to go.
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Everyone has their own time limit for me it was about 7 years😮💨
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If you have to ask strangers bc your not sure of yourself it’s time to leave. If he wanted to change he would take the measures to do so
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When we went to marriage guidance and I was advised to get divorced. I was lucky that I could move back to my mother’s house with my 2 children.
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If you have to write this, then leave!!
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Immediately before you become complacent with your situation. You can’t help an alcoholic or drug addict, they have to help themselves and by staying you are essentially enabling and putting not only yourself but your kids at risk from alcoholism and or severe trauma issues.
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If your asking that question, it’s been time to leave.
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You’re gonna get all different answers. Addiction is a hard thing to deal with for everyone involved. And I believe a lot needs to be considered. Are there other issues? Does he admit there is a problem? Does he want to stop and is willing to try or does he have no desire to change anything?
Don’t waste time!!! Spent 18yrs with an alcoholic for nothing to change….Finally had enough him picking beer over his daughters…
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If you have to talk about it more than twice and it’s something that really bothers you then it’s time to go
Lol do not waste any more time. I wasn’t married to this person but I spent 8.5 years with an alcoholic. Best thing I ever did was leave. If he hasn’t made an effort to get sober for real, he probably won’t. Just leave.
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Each one of us has a different “red line” that cannot be crossed. We are all different. If he has developed an addiction, he might not be able to quit on his own. You will have to decide how much you can take. Can he still keep a job? Does it interfere with his daily life? Those are signs that it has become a problem for him.
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Only u know when uve had enough, we can tell u to leave till we r blue in the face, but it won’t make u leave. U gotta put u first
When you feel you’ve said it too many times to where it’s bothering you. If your asking this question I think it would be time.
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Currently going through a divorce cuz of my husband being an alcoholic. Been together since we were 14 and married for 20 years. I just knew i couldn’t live this life any longer and his drinking only got worse. Good luck!
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When you start questioning if you should leave.
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If you’re asking the question I’d say now. You aren’t fully invested in this relationship any more and are pulling away knowing that you’ve asked, you’ve tried, you’re hitting dead ends. With this kind of thing, people will only change when they’re good and ready to do so. If you aren’t ready to totally walk away then perhaps it’s time to put up some hard boundaries and make that known. If those boundaries are crossed, you can move forward with what you need to do without doubting yourself.
When the pain of change becomes less than the pain of staying the same. That’s also the point when your spouse will decide to get sober.
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I walked away from my alcoholic husband and he woke up and sobered up. We got back together after sobriety. It is the best relationship ever now.
I asked the same question got the same answers and made the hard choice. It’s hard yes, was I happy for the year we were separated absolutely.
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When you feel you’re fed up and when you are ready. You’ll know
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Sometimes walking away will give you all the answers you need. He’s not choosing alcohol over you, addiction has sadly chosen him. He needs to commit to hard work and help in order to beat it. Not an easy task.
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Check out anon or whatever it’s called I’ve heard good things
You walk away when you’ve had all your going to take. You’ll walk away when there is nothing to keep you there. If you are asking social media, your aren’t there yet. When I finally left there was no tears shed and no remorse…not even when he tried to convince me he quit drinking. Of course he smelled of whiskey when he said it. I felt relieved not sad.
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One timer should be enough for adult
Turn to God! 
I thought it sounded crazy at first as well. I had lots of people tell me. Whole heartedly turn to God. Do not give up on your husband. PRAY PRAY PRAY! Anoint his pillow your house and pray for the spirit of alcoholism to leave! Do not give up! 3 years later of turning to God, finding my faith, and having a true relationship with Jesus. My husband is currently 7months sober today! He use to say there would never be a day he’d not drink And he said he would never go back. Have faith, have a strong support system! God will turn it for good!
Drinking is an addiction, if they are willing to get help, I think you stay and figure it out together. Just telling an addict to stop or that you don’t like it isn’t enough.
If you’re asking this then I believe it’s time
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When you get tired of being miserable you’ll leave
The only person who can help your spouse is themselves.
Drinking is a terrible addiction. And you are not more important than their drinking. As you are learning.
It will only change when they want it to. And lots of times they will lose everything before they lose their addiction.
Pack your stuff and leave. Live a happy life. Of however you choose.
You knew he was a drunk when you married him. Don’t be mad at him for being himself be mad at yourself for making a bad decision against your better judgment
When you decide you can’t tolerate a narcissist any longer.
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Check out al-anon you can learn how to love an alcholic
If you’re asking you already know the answer…
If you’ve exhausted all avenues (AA, therapy/counseling, rehab etc) and the person is unwilling or not putting in the work? Walk.
If there is a safety issue for you or your kids, walk anyway.
Temporary breaks are fine too. Give them an ultimatum and some space. Reevaluate.
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As a person who spent years with an active alcoholic I say leave now. You will be destroyed the longer you stay in it and the things they end up doing to you will break you.
Now. I only had to ask my now husband once and he chose me… I wouldn’t have have asked again
Leave now because it’s not going to stop. Trust me.
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You will know when you’ve had enough. There’s no magic number and it’s different for everyone. I think you’re probably there considering you just posted on social media about it.
When I told mine this almost 21 years ago we weren’t married yet but I gave him a choice he didn’t listen I left indiana went to Florida after 2 weeks he was begging me to come back I told him he had a choice me and his family or the alcohol he said he would stop and I came back and he didn’t drink a drop for many years we got married a year later and are getting ready to celebrate put 19th wedding anniversary so if they want to keep their family they will sometimes it takes them losing you to figure it out so don’t give up yet doll if you live him
Never spend more time with an alcoholic thinking it’s going to get better. It won’t but it will get worst. They only have one love and that’s alcohol. If they really wanted to quit they would seek help. If they only act like they want to quit it doesn’t work like that. These folks need serious intervention. Sometimes hospitals are necessary because serious alcoholism need alcohol as a lifeline or they will have seizures which can be fatal. Depends on how deep he is into alcoholism. Good luck to you
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Sadly he shant quit cause you want him to, hes gotta quit cause he wants to, if hes made no attempt to quit then walk away, if walking away is the jolt he needed to seek help dont take his word for it u need proof or its just one horrible vicious circle, i was married to my 1st husband 12 years nothing made him quit, he was also violent with it so enough was enough i was done, never looked back since, just kick myself i didnt leave him sooner, good luck x
Usually when you start asking these kinds of questions, for validation, suppport, to vent…
Ur already there
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Oh and start documenting now to use in court for visitation…
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You’re posting here you know what you have to do just do it and I’m so sorry
Hey out before you completely hate him 
I hope you don’t have children. They learn what they live.
At the point you’re thinking about walking away. It’s starting to affect your mental health and I guarantee kiddos are picking up on it and it’s creating a stressful environment for them.
I had a friend with a similar situation. She took the kiddos with her to stay elsewhere for a few days and told hubby this will become permanent if you don’t get help and he chose to get help and he’s several years sober and their family is stronger than ever. 
If he makes the choice that breaks your heart, know it’s going to suck for a while but you’re not alone and you’ll be on the path of leading a life where you get to make your own choices of what you want out of life and what is not welcome.
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. That’s for big things: drugs, alcohol, cheating, etc.
Yeah…That’s a tough one, frequent alchol use ruins lives… It’s no better than drugs and can spiral out of control real quick.(dangerously speaking)
They have to want to stop drinking.
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Go to Al-Anon. It’s for friends and family of alcoholics and other addicts. Also consider counseling with a therapist who specializes in chemical dependency.
The answer to your question is above our pay grade. But Al-Anon will help you heal and find your own answers.
Did you marry him that way…for better or worse, richer or power, in sickness and health…pretty sure your perfect…
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I was the child of an alcoholic. Leave now for your own sanity and health especially if kids are involved. Always false promises they change. My dad still drank 20 yrs after divorce. Got ill nearly died, he left hospital and stayed sober after I threatened to piss off and he’d never see his grandkids again. We got 4 years of dad back unfortunatly now dementias got him
I wasted nearly eight yrs of my life waiting for him to change. When my mom passed and I saw that she had wait till the day she died for her spouse to change or fulfil his promises and I was repeating the exact same things she did for my three kids to replicate in their future relationships continuing the cycle of accepting fake promises and disrespect
I’m now married with a wonderful man who’s helped me more than he can ever know I didn’t know this kind of never ending happiness was even possible and I nearly robbed myself of it waiting for some regular a$$ guy
Here’s the thing. He has to hit rock bottom. He will never get sober for anyone but himself. Leave and support him from a distance, and know when to cut off communication conpletely. Maybe go to an al-anon meeting for some guidance. They’re quite helpful.
Only you will know my friend! When it hurts less and you think about what makes you happy. I’m almost their myself at this point
When you can’t live with it a h more. When it’s affecting you so negatively that it’s all consuming. You’ll know when you’ve had enough.
First of all, he doesn’t drink because he doesn’t love you. It’s a disease. Addiction is complicated.
However, you don’t have to stay. In fact, it’s better you don’t. Because an addict will not change for you or anyone else. They change when they are so sick and tired of living the way that they are that the only two options are sobriety or death.
Pray for him, but don’t enable him. Walk away.
Might I also suggest support for yourself in the way of alanon or counseling of some kind.
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I’m a fighter darlin…. I fought my ex husband 5 of 7 years bc of a drug addiction. I was young… 17 when we got together 24 when we divorced. Everybody has different limits & you’ll get a different answer from every one of us. I’ve been with my current husband 11yrs… we were high school sweethearts…. And I’ll say this much, you’ll never find happiness if you’re living in misery. Do what’s best for you and yours
if i need to say it more than once. i don’t repeat myself.
once i state something & he’s not taking initiative to correct it, me & the kids are gone. especially if it were a drinking or drug problem. i will NOT tolerate that.
If you have to ask… it’s passed time!
That’s a really good question. I don’t have an answer for you other than you’ll just know.
I was with my ex for 13 years, he always drank but it got really bad. It wasn’t just the drinking, but the out all night,the fights, the way he was towards me, the way I was no longer a priority, when my oldest called me a b#### because he had done it in front of her so many times. That was my breaking point. I left for good and didn’t look back. Everyone has their own way of knowing.
Sounds like your done already. Dump his ass.