Hello all, I am going to be as short as possible but paint a picture as clear as I possibly can. So I have two children ( ages 7 & 8 ) who he hasn’t seen since 2017 or spoken to me since early 2018. He has had my email, knows I was in contact with his family, known my address, my grandmother (who lived in the same town), my mother, and my own phone number before I had to change it due to his girlfriend harassing me. He hasn’t made an attempt to talk to them since roughly June of 2018. We came back to -insert state here- where his family lives. He and his girlfriend are also coming back to live here. He is trying to get in contact with me all of a sudden and this alarms me. In our divorce it was that I was physical, primary, and legal parent and his only right was 2 (60 minute) visits a week and (2 hour) visits on holidays or birthdays. These all have to be supervised. He signed off on these as well. The papers were signed in Feb of 2016. Before that, he never really took care of the children in general.I am scared for their safety. I am just wondering— would I be able to petition for termination of rights due to abandonment? The law for abandonment is only 4 months here— we have been here since June of 2020. Main Reasons for initial seperation-He was mentally and emotionally abusive for years to me. He wouldn’t get a job to support his children and the one time I got a job, he neglected them for the entire duration of when I was gone.Another area of concern-Both children have severity level 2 of Autism and ADHD. One has a language processing disorder as well.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Can I terminate the fathers rights? - Mamas Uncut
You can file for full custody but he has to terminate his rights
So, in Idaho, you cannot terminate parental rights only transfer them to someone else. If your state allows you to terminate, I’d say do it.
I don’t think you could do abandonment now since he has reached out, you should of done it a while ago if that’s what you were wanting to do. Also since you both are living in the same area it probably makes the visiting easier.
Based on the laws of abandonment it could revoke his visitation. Make sure you have all the evidence and witnesses would be helpful!
Im confused. He gets two times a week and they are supervised. What are you afraid he is going to do? This is a genuine question. Obviously he wasnt a good enough parent to get unsupervised visits.
I would contact a lawyer immediately because a lot of things depend on the state in which you live but I would contact a lawyer immediately and tell him everything and go from there.
Consult a family lawyer in your state. The initial consultation is often free.
It’s no longer abandonment if he’s trying to contact you now. There isn’t enough information for true answers since laws vary from state to state.
You’d need to speak with a family lawyer. You can try under abandonment but theres probably a process to that and the opportunity for him to appeal that case.
Maybe before he tried contacting you again you could’ve, but you literally said he’s trying to contact you now soooo🤷🏻♀️ and if his visits are supervised visits what exactly do you think he’s doing to do?
No you can’t. Not without his permission. He is attempting to be in their lives, he has a right. It’s supervised and very tiny amounts of time.
Find a family lawyer, or go to the local court house and ask what paper you need to file to start a motion to terminate rights
So, my ex didn’t see his children for nearly 5 years. We had to go to court because he was behind on child support. They informed him that it was considered abandonment after one year of no contact so, if I wanted him to have anything to do with the children it was up to my discretion now. Our kids are 19 and 16 now. However, he doesn’t push for them to come see him, we leave it up to them as he knows he messed up. Maybe get a lawyer and see what your options are. A lot of consultations are free but make sure to go to a family law attorney. Good luck mama.
If he reaches out, do not respond back. My daughter went through this, her lawyer is going for termination of rights, for her daughters dad. You will prolly have to get a lawyer and do it that way. You could go get a protective order on him and his girlfriend, if they start harassing or threatening.
Keep every text of all conversations, between you and him and her, if you do respond back.
If he hasn’t paid child support and has not seen the kids for awhile then yes it’s abandonment speaks with the Lawyer that divorced you guys and gave you full custody
Get a lawyer being he has now reached out it can become difficult
Speak to a lawyer. Each state or country is different. Most have type of legal aid if you can not afford a lawyer. You will only get opinions here.
Depending on what state your in. Most states…he has to terminate. But…his rights can also be removed. From what I’m reading. Being supervised won’t be far from termination. Keep all paperwork…and photos.
No. He’s already supervised and you don’t seen to have any valid grounds to be concerned for their safety.
Yes you can petition for it to be dismissed. Especially since he hasn’t exercised his rights that were court documented. They will ask why all of a sudden after years, he’s now calling. Throwing children into visitation with basically a stranger is not good for them, mentally so you do have that on your side.
Him “attempting” to reach out to you now doesn’t erase the no contact for the previous five years. If he had 60 minutes supervised visitation previously, it isn’t likely they’ll just hand them over to him now, as there was a reason for that, and he’s abandoned them. You for sure need a lawyer and I would do that quickly if he is attempting to make contact with you
Get a lawyer. As a parent with a kiddo who also has level 2 ASD it can become very confusing and potentially cause regression if progress has been made. Feel free to reach out to me.
I get he has not been good to you.
But,
Mental illness isnt a reason to not allow Supervised visitation. Not having a job is not a reason to Not allow Supervised visitation of his kids.
He could’ve spent the last few years making the changes he needed to for those kids and Now is reaching out.
Put this situation in reverse. How would you feel if you only had short supervised visits or someone wanted to revoke your rights to your kids.
You cannot terminates his rights, I am pretty sure we don’t have the whole story here. Is he paying child support, that should of been set in your divorce.
Contact your court house an ask for a pro bono lawyer honey they will point you in the right direction. No out of pocket costs 
What is Exactley are you afraid he is going to do? Do your children want a relationship with him. You need to think long and hard about this. If you take away his rights how will your children feel about it in the long run?
No contact restraining order but I wouldn’t terminate rights because then he wouldn’t have to pay child support or the arrears.
You can go to court and file. I forget exactly what it’s called the paperwork you need but the clerk should help you answer that question. File abandonment and explain that he hasn’t reached out. Don’t tell them that he recently reached out though. If he wants to fight it he’ll have to show up in court and explain why he’s had no contact with his kids for for 4 or 5 years. Also it’s detrimental for young children during the disability to have a random stranger come in their life. Definitely foul to have his rights terminated however I’m pretty sure you don’t get child support then
Slam dunk, judges love the word “continuity” and he hasnt had any part of them for so long that it would be a monsterous adjustment for them to re-acclimate to him, My moneys on you
You can definitely prove abandonment 
so pursue that
In some state if the father has help or tried to see his child in over a year. You can file abandonment on him
Depends on where you live but most likely not… The father/mother often has to abuse the kids to lose access… Abuse towards you or not seeing the kids won’t stop access… Here at least.
Get to, terminate everything you can pertaining to this man. Why put those precious kids through having to learn to live without him again? They’ve already been through this one time.I don’t think he should be allowed to just flit in and out of their lives at will.
You will.need a spouse that is willing to adopt them in most cases of tpr’s
Abandonment is a custody issue, not a rights issue. Being a douche isn’t a reason to be alienated. That’s my 2 cents
My oldest daughters father ignored her for 9 years then took me to court for custody. He was $80,000+ in arrears on child support and he and his wife thought they would get child support from me if they got custody. Because my daughter didn’t know them she did not like going on the mandatory weekend visits ordered by the court and I didn’t make her go a few times. Me not making her go was considered by the court as noncompliance and the judge said he didn’t think I would encourage a healthy relationship with her father (even though for the first few years of her life I begged him to even acknowledge her). I lost primary custody. Then they withheld visits from me but the court didn’t look at that in the same light for some reason 
Tread carefully with court orders. Follow them to the letter.
Probably not especially since you said he has been trying to contact you recently so grow up and co parent
Why are you asking strangers on FB this question? There’s usually more to a story and individual state laws would apply. This is a question for all 3 of your attorneys (if your children don’t have one - the judge will appoint one to represen only them,) and the presiding judge. That’s it.
If it was so serious then you should have done so in 2020 at the 4 month mark. People’s decision making process doesn’t make sense sometimes.
His parental rights won’t be terminated, so don’t waste your money or time on a lawyer and court, because it’s senseless. If you moved away and you changed your number, then you’re who will be blamed for alienating him. If he’s gotten his life together, then all he has to do is file for a modification of custody based on a change of material circumstances.
Easily…he barely has rights now. Make sure you show proof and document of everything…
Where I live a judge will not bastardize kids. Someone has to be willing to adopt them in order for another’s rights to be terminated.
Each state is different.
Contact a lawyer. Your state laws & specific situation will have a lot to do with what you can do. I was told in Michigan a father’s rights can not be terminated unless he’s been convicted of abuse or you’re married & your husband wants to adopt him. I’ve known of cases where he was convicted for abusing the child or mother & still gets rights.
Only advise I’m comfortable with giving you is to have no contact with him. Don’t respond to him in anyway. That can easily be used against you by someone who’s emotionally abusive/narcissistic. IF he serves you papers for visitation or custody obtain a lawyer ASAP. Do not go to court without a lawyer.
If the father is requesting time I don’t think you can call it abandonment but definitely call a lawyer. I bet this is really scary so maybe talking to a therapist also. Judges rarely want to sever a tie If the dad is saying he wants to see them. The father needs to be notified and signed off before they would grant it I believe
He wanted to see them no !!!
You can try and plead your case. My sis had tried terminating her kids father’s rights based on zero contact, he’s in and out of jail, and only came out of the woodwork when my niece died and he collected on insurance $. They didn’t terminate his rights, even after all that. Talk to a family court lawyer and take you best shot at a better future for your kiddos
Does the paperwork say who the visits are to be supervised by? Court ordered program or one of his family members or just by you? If you can get it to be a program that does visitations for supervised visitations that is a good start. They will watch everything very closely and the note of anything of concern. But don’t go against the court orders because that can go against you if he wants to take you to court.
Yes, you can get him on abandonment.
However, since his recent contact you will need to have evidence of why it’s not good for him to have a relationship with his kids.
For example if he has gotten his life together (good job, has other kids in his care etc) then, his might be able to get visitations because he has shown that he has ‘grown up’. However, if you have evidence that he has recently been released from jail, has been in trouble with the law, no job etc. it might make you case strong enough that you could terminate his rights.
It would be best to speak to a lawyer though. They might advise you not to contact him and not respond to any messages/calls from him.
Go ask a lawyer! The only way I know of is abandonment or proving he’s unfit (drug use and so on) and won’t change. This normally calls for arrest records of drug charges or medical records of drug use of some sort. You can’t take his rights without proving he is unfit to be a parent in some way
Best advice….get legal counsel.
I would definitely file for abandonment and anything else that can and may apply. Those kids are definitely better off not seeing him unless he’s somehow become a different person but if he’s still with someone who made you have to leave, I doubt he has
His parental rights will not be terminated. If they start making him child support he will be able to legally to see them children. Grow up and start co-parenting with him
No you can’t have his rights terminated if he is currently making contact
Terminate asap…you have legal grounds…and all the paperwork…
You have reason to gain supervised visits. Rather that than nothing. Please consider the children may want to see their Dad. That is very important.
Maybe he has matured and grown up in that time… Don’t punish your kids for you not trusting him… He is their father… Accept his contact and see what he has to say… Stop jumping to conclusions… Listen to what he has to say and then work it out
I’m English so don’t know how things work in your country but my advise do what you can that is legally available to you to keep him away he has had ample opportunities and has not bothered if you are concerned about safety issues too most certainly do what is available to you best wishes and good luck X
Honestly it depends on what state you live in. But if you can prove the abuse and abandonment they will take alway his parental rights. I’m not sure for certain that that will be what happens cause every state and every judge is different. But I do know that no judge will make kids go some where they aren’t safe. So on the supervised visits he does get document everything. And eventually it all adds together and they will see the toxic behaviors and at least take away his visitation.
You need to speak to a lawyer that’s what I’m having to do to have my baby daddy rights terminated to my daughter.
You need a family attorney who specializes in custody!
You can’t take away his parental rights.
Seeing ahead he is to be supervised was important! Tell your lawyer what you’ve said here and let him handle it .
Never keep kids away from their father regardless of what the situation might be
Wow, I guess we have a bunch of attorneys on this site! While.ost of this advise is good, nobody knows what state you live in. Contact an appropriate attorney. The consult is usually free. If he has court supervised visits,he has the option of seeing his kid(s). Good luck!!
After a year of no visitation it is legal status of being Abandoned I know because I went through this with my sons biological dad he wanted to terminate his custody was held accountable for back child support which I dropped it down to $900 used $ to buy my son a very nice swing set & new clothes he was more than happy to do so
Maybe he has grown up some. Grant him his supervised visits and go from there.
If you really feel your kids would be in danger, contact an attorney for real legal advice… because chances are, not a single person who gave you advice on here is an attorney 
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You don’t need anyones permission or opinions when it comes to doing what you know is best for your children. Speak to an attorney. If he’s unsafe, and unfit for them (as clearly stated in the very limited and supervised time he’s allowed) and has clearly abandoned them, then he has already shown you his priorities and behavior. You have an open and shut case.
Good luck to you n your family
Your court system will be able to decide if you can take away his rights or not…
But if he wants to see them now maybe he is doing better and will actually help with them.
File for abandonment in court minimum of no contact of any kind for 6 months file and request termination of parental rights and or at least full custody!! ASAP you can run the paper with notice of court and what’s its for time and day location of court with his full name last known information ect for said amount of weeks for proof of service and then you will probably get it
Because he is currently reaching out, you have to acknowledge. If you wanted to terminate rights you would’ve had to do so during the years he was not making contact.
However, you really should consult a lawyer local to you as there are many different laws from state to state.
Also, please understand, in a rights termination case they are required to allow the child’s father to plead his case & if for any reason the judge feels it necessary to deny your rights termination - they will do so, change your parenting time order, and put a new parenting time/custody order on record. Unfortunately, rights termination is sooo hard! So so so hard!
Best of luck mama!
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If he’s trying to contact you now, then no you can’t file abandonment. He still has rights and he can fight for them. You need to consult with an attorney.
l Get paid over $111 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $13659 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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I’d allow them to see him, as they are supervised and he cannot cause harm during the time he has with them, being as they are supervised. He may have had a turning point in his life, and wants to see his kids. You also said you moved away. Are there laws in the state where the final ruling was made, stating how far one parent can move from the other? Many states do have that clause, so you may want to check into that. I wouldn’t terminate, or even think about terminating a parents rights because kids do need a mother and father. Have you considered how the kids would feel if you did that to them?
You could contact a lawyer. Getting rights terminated is extremely hard, especially with no one to adopt the kids but it can be done. You’d need a very good lawyer. My lawyer in TN has been able to do it for several single mothers with no adoptions involved and it’s supposed to be very hard there.
No idea as evey state is different. But I wouldn’t be surprised if you can’t since it has now not been 6 months since he has tried to contact you. You already how supervised visit. I would just let him see them. Bet he doesn’t show or its only a couple times.
You need a lawyer. If you can’t afford one there’s probably a pro bono one in your area. I think there’s even a website you can ask legal questions.
I guess it depends on the laws and regulations in the state you live. Get advice from a lawyer…
Your gonna have to go to court
In Florida, it is nearly impossible to terminate a parent’s rights unless there is someone willing to adopt. Because they dint want the children becoming a “burden” of the state. Start with your state laws and go from there.
Get a lawyer and go from there hun. Good luck and i hope it turns out the best for you and your sweet kids 
It’s worth a try or at least speak with someone
Shoulda did it before he contacted you again. It might be harder now that he’s contacted you.
You cannot tweeze the dna out of those kids.
I’m unsure where you are. But regardless I don’t think it’s easy to terminate rights.
I’m In Canada & basically you go to court serve your ex & if your ex goes to court then the court will still keep his rights , they may make supervised visits or something. But no matter what you say or he says the court always will look at what’s best for the child.
l Get paid over $112 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $13436 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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I hope you can. Our family has a monster in it as well. Unfortunately, the state of Ohio protects the monsters because they are biological. I hope you can keep him away
Here the time starts over again after contact. Also here they won’t allow termination of rights unless someone else is adopting them.
Scared for they what did he do… maybe he don’t come around because of how many hours he getting did u think of that
He may be trying to get ahold of you to terminate his visiting rights. You don’t know, but you surely shouldn’t be worried. You’ve tried contacting him. Sounds like he doesn’t want to be a father.
The only facebook advice you should take regarding custody of your children, is to get them their own attorney and take legal council on how you should proceed.
We live in Indiana. My daughter went to court to terminate her ex’s right to their son. They contacted him he agreed and that was it. She changed his last name to her maiden name. Btw they were divorced, and she took back her maiden name.
Not his rights but perhaps visitation you can stop visitation … FYI rights n visitations are totally different in the eyes of the law his rights doesnt mean he gets visitations id take in front of the judge with everything you said here n don’t let him or anyone in his family see the kids unless your around in fear they may kidnap them
U need to speak to a lawyer. Laws matter in situations like this and are different across the nation.
If he only gets an hour visit and 2 hours for the holidays supervised, it tells me he’s not fit to care for them. So why bother letting him in their life?
Doubt they will approve it since he’s made the attempt now.