I would honestly confront him about it and if it makes him uncomfortable then maybe he needs to understand why it’s wrong. They make plus size bathing suits. Like what’s his problem? I’m sure when his family goes to the beach or a resort with a pool that they see obese people. They can get over it.
Have a talk with her and ask him point blank
Ask him. Are you ashamed of my body because of this and this and see what he says.
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Just ask, obviously he’s with you and no one else. But say I like to swim too.
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Ask point blank. But, if he really doesn’t enjoy swimming that much but you aren’t there to spend time with he may just be “going with the flow”. You don’t know until you ask. Tell him your feelings.
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Tell him how you feel. make sure he looks you in the eye when he answers and then you will have the answer.
Instead of asking people that don’t know you…talk to your boyfriend….
Go with the gut, it don’t lie!
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Talk to him, explain how his actions make you feel. Energy never lies and you’re not wrong feeling this way especially giving the examples you gave. Maybe he’s afraid of what his family will think I’m not sure but girl ROCK YOUR BODY as is, know you are fabulous and if u desire to work on your body let it be YOUR choice for YOU not no man. If he’s not willing to love all of you kick him to the curb period!! Hugs Queen:rose:
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I’m sorry. I’m a big girl too. It could be that he’s sensitive. I would just go along with what he wants for now. Decide if you want to stay with someone like that, or if you would rather be on your own till you find someone more accepting of who you are.
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Communication… straight up ask him maybe he thinks your self conscious and trying to be considerate of you and your feelings??
you want someone to accept u as you are ok
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Ask him, u should b able to tell with his reaction xx
Sounds like Shallow Hal to me. Move on. You have more important places to be.
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If you want to go swimming go put your suit on and go if you r comfortable no one can stop you from going swimming but you
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220 isn’t that big for your height. But if you are insecure about your body he will feel that and maybe he is trying to avoid that.
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Come back to us after you have communicated these feelings to him. We can’t give any advice if you haven’t properly communicated your feelings.
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Sit home down and talk. Explain it to him like you did us… if he avoids the conversation or gets mad at you, then you know the truth.
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Ask him and take your swim stuff and go swimming if u want to. Who cares what they think.
You been with the man for three years. Just straight up ask him.
Sometimes we like to be in denial about things. It’s easier on our feelings to just wonder if that’s the case. Instead of actually hearing it come out of their mouth. But save yourself a headache and just ask.
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Ask him… Assumption is a terrible thing and can mess with even the nicest of intentions. Ask him honestly and be ready for anything
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Buy that bathing suit and go swimming. Be confident. Lead the way.
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Don’t ask, just go with a swimsuit. If he is ashamed, that’s his problem, not yours. He needs to get over it and you shouldn’t have to worry about pleasing anyone else.
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Maybe he is trying to make you more comfortable by nit making you be in a bathing suit sensing your insecurities. Maybe he knows how judgemental his family is. You need to talk to him be direct about how you feel.
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Always be you no matter what your size is,I went through this too,it helps to have a talk with the boyfriend,just so ya don’t drive yourself up a wall… Stay strong,an be YOU!!!
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Do you weigh the same as you did when he met you? I highly doubt he is if so, even if you don’t i doubt he is. Are you self conscious of yourself? I know my husband would never post pictures of me pool side because he knows how I feel about my body so maybe he’s doing it to be respectful.
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I’d straight up ask him about. It could be a jealousy thing on his part. Maybe he doesn’t want the men in his family to see his woman in a bathing suit. 
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Show him your confident in your skin. Bring the swimsuit and hangout pool side. Also…talk to him about your feelings.
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Don’t think of him, think of you and love yourself and your body and if you want to swim go n put a bathing suit on and swim and take your own pics or ask him to take pics of you and his family members and ask his family to take pics of you and him. Be confident within yourself seriously look who he is with now I don’t think it has anything to do with his exes being skinny, now go n grab. Bathing suit and go and strut your stuff and shine shine shine xxx
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I think easiest way is next time he says he wants you to go to the beach with his family, (he is allowed to go without you to see and visit his family) But when you are invited, you ask so you’re family knows I’m coming?
If he says yes, then if it were me I’d say great, I’ve been looking forward to going to the beach, I’m excited to go and I will pack my new swimsuit.
Then scope out how he responds. If he cancels trip or uninvites you etc
Or when you’re there he makes excuses on why he doesn’t want to swim etc. and it’s not raining 
or something
Then you’ll know.
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5’10 and presently 240 and “over the hill”. Girl, slap on that 2 peice and strut your shit like you own the place!!! F*ck him!
Ask him. We dont know his reason…
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Sounds too me like you are right. Why are you letting him tell you what you can and can’t pack? Pack your swim suit. Don’t pack his. If you want to swim then swim.Tell him you didn’t pack his swimwear b cause you are ashamed of his body. Have fun girl. If he wants to sit on the sidelines let him.
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Bring your suit anyway and get in…
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I would do it anyway. Don’t let him hold you back. But ask him.
Sounds like you have a problem with your body. Exercise and diet for yourself to feel better about yourself.
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Umm. Since when does someone tell you not to bring a suit? Take the swim suit. Go to the beach. Swim. Lounge. Whatever it may be. But wear the damn suit. Problem solved.
Buy as sexy suite and rock what you got.
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Take a deep breath and enjoy your life weight is only a number and you can lose weight if it is important to you.
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I would say goodbye and good riddance.
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I would just ask him and see what he says
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Don’t put up with that mess
Tell him he either takes you as you are or the other alternative is you leave, but what ever you do don’t change who you are for anyone be true to yourself
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Sounds like it to me I’m going thru something very similar so I know how ur feeling so when he says not to pack a swim suit pack it anyway and u go swimming without him don’t feel ashamed of ur own body trust me I’ve been fighting this for three years now feel good about yourself
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It doesn’t matter what they think. Be yourself and enjoy your life any size.
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Pack a suit and if you feel like it, go swimming, or just sun bathe. Ask him if he’s ashamed of you. If so, bye bye.
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Take your swim suit anyway and walk out in it who cares what they think
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I would be ask him the true . You should just put them on see what he dose .
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Bring a bang ass bathing suit anyway. Nothin sexier than a woman confident about her own body, and if he’s got issue with that then say goodbye.
Have you talked to him about how you feel? Relationships will never survive if you cannot communicate
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Do you ever express insecurities about being in a bathing suit? He could be thinking you will feel insecure so he wants to avoid it for you? His ex’s may be small… but they’re his ex’s. They weren’t meant for him. Maybe you are? Talk to him. It might be something completely different.
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Ask him… communication.
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Sit him down & ask him " face to face " tell him you see the photos of him swimming when you are not there & ask Why " & if you’re weight is the problem pack him off"
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5’8 and 220 isnt big. Most men prefer a little thickness anyway. If he wasn’t attracted to you to begin with, he wouldn’t of stayed persuing you into a relationship. I would ask him straight up “babe, please be honost… how come you avoid anything that involves me in a bathing suit, is it because you’re ashamed of my body?” … only do this if you can handle the truth though … its the only way youre going to know… it may be all in your head though… (Especially if you haven’t gained a significant amount of weight since you two got together) either way, i would ask him so you can stop torturing yourself with those thoughts. 
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Ummm how about asking him!
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well his family is fully aware that you arent a teeny tiny girl so maybe they believe that YOU are ashamed off your body since you dont go swimming ,so just bring that suit and go for it , they may surprise you and your boyfriend may need a little reality check and needs to face the fact that he has choosen to love a girl who doesnt just live on air and water and who is REAL,
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You find someone who loves every single inch of you this is so typical and YES he doesn’t want you around his family that’s a red flag that you shouldn’t ignore if you want to be truly happy
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I can gaurentee it’s not your body he ashamed with … if he was ashamed of your body he wouldn’t take you anywhere and would tell you all the time your overweight. It’s probably another family member that he doesn’t want you to be confronted with that has a problem with you Just talk to him and tell him you want to go swimming
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Try losing weight if u are self conscience about your body
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You pack a suit and strut your stuff.
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Pack a great swimsuit and a cute maxi skirt coverup no matter what. Whip off the skirt at an appropriate time and dive in! It’s all about your confidence. Now that summer’s coming, wear it at home in the back yard with a great hat. I have a friend who does iron woman triathlons and she is bigger than you.
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Just ask him to tell the truth. If he is ashamed of your body, boy bye!
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Sweetie you have been dating for 3 years does he say i love you…if he does then he isnt ashamed of you…if he hasnt said the love word yet then maybe he has a problem…most people have moved in together by now so i was just wondering…
How do you get along with his family do they treat you good …do they even say arent you going to go swimming…in the 3 years you have been together you have had to been around them quite a bit…yes…
Its odd that he swims when you are not there but on the occasion he does bring you he doesnt want to swim…so do you all hang out by the pool with your clothes on getting hot while everyone else swims…very strange indeed…does he ever take you swimming anywhere at all where you have to wear a bathing suit…how do you know all his exes were all skinny does he have pictures of them all stored in his phone and shows you
So sit him down and have a realky good talk and tell him what you said on your post that you see pics of them all by the pool but doesnt want to swim when you come and if he is embarassed …just lay it all out and see where the convo goes…hopefully he isnt the type that is embarrassed with your clothes off around other people…that means that he isnt the guy for you and he isnt that sweet of a guy after all and best to end it…good luck
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Sadly, you may not be able to ever get over this, all together. First marriage, first child at 21 – I had never been really “tiny” — --5’ 2" and 120 lbs. While in my last trimester, I caught my ex AND his dad repeatedly walking behind me and “waddling” – I was crushed. After delivery, I was apalled at the stretch marks and “flab” plus him being repulsed by my breastfeeding - (I gave it up pretty quickly) from then on, I was very uncomfort-
able being with him unless fully clothed and then only in the dark. My child was plump – he blamed me for “making her that way” with my build/habits , etc.". We finally separated and divorced – all of his future “love interests” were always tall and willowly. Even though I tried hard - - strenuous dieting, exercising and even diet pills, I never regained that taut girlish shape or my avoidance of any clothing that didn’t masquerade my body.
For your own sake, face this with him now and don’t let this feeling of inferiority (actual or not) warp/influence your well being and self confidence for the rest of your life!
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Try talking to him about it
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Ask him straight out if he’s that shallow a person 
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I don’t think you’ll be able to exactly get over something like that not until you ask him… and be very frank with him tell him exactly how you feel and you’re reasons behind it. I’m a big girl and I used to be very insecure about my weight no matter how much my husband would try to reassure me. Please be open with him on you’re feelings you need to feel secure with you’re self as well.
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Ask him. Plus bring your suit and do what you want
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He MIGHT be worried about YOUR feelings about yourself & doesn’t want you to feel uncomfortable. TALK TO HIM ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL!!! OPEN COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO HAPPY RELATIONSHIP!!
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I’m 5’5" and 222 lbs. I don’t feel I’m that big tho. A size 16 in jeans but i don’t feel huge.
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Babe, you pack that bathing suit and you do your thing!!
Talk to him about it. That’s the only way that you’ll get your answers.