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QUESTION:
"Hey mamas… I need some advice. Do you think it is possible that my boyfriend could be ashamed of how I look or do you tihnk it could be all in my head. let me give some backstory…my boyfriend and I have ben together for 3 years now…he has been great to me and we go out all the time. now his exes are all very skinny and I am 5’8 and 220 lbs…so now where near petite…he has always been a sweet heart to me and very caring but every time his family gets together at his beach house…he either doesn’t take me or we do not go swimming so he says we do not need a bathing suit…but when I am not there, he posts photos of his entire family poolside including him…maybe this is all in my head but I cannot get over the feeling that he is ashmed for his family to see my body since all his other exes were so little…how do i get past this?"
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"Do you go anywhere with him in bathing suit like vacations etc"
"I would think the other way, that he doesn’t want his family to enjoy “his girl” in a bathing suit… not much better tho"
"It could be that they are not as nice when it comes to others’ weight and he feels he’s protecting you. Or he is worried himself. Just ask him about it. Assuming or stewing will affect you. Just ask. If he takes it well or not is on him"
"I feel like you wouldn’t feel like that for no reason if he’s making you feel that way you should talk to him and see how he reacts and what he says. You should feel comfortable with your body and he should too enough to go swimming with you."
"I would point blank just ask him. See what he has to say. Or next time, bring your swim suit & go swimming regardless of what he says."
"When ya go you go swimming! Also ask him about it and tell him how you feel."
"I would talk to him about it … maybe he feels he doesn’t want to put u in a uncomfortable situation maybe he is trying to consider ur feelings but it’s definitely something u should talk to him about and get it off your chest"
"Maybe it’s not him. Maybe it’s the fam. He could could worried someone might hurt ur feelings.
"Maybe his family are assholes and he is trying to shield you from them."
"Literally ask him-if you don’t, you will continue to wonder"
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