Do people change ?
I’ve been with this guy for 4 years. I didn’t know him Prior to this time. I’ve just found out he’s been issuing cocaine for 10years. We have a one year old together. He’s signed up to a clinic to get “help” he’s said he wants to stop for our family and he doesn’t want to be that person anymore. He then went missing for a week over Christmas and thinks he can come back and everything is fine. He is a horrible person when using and he can be quite nasty never to me but this past week was the first time he turned on me sending me horrible messages he was very apologetic after the fact of course
I guess I’m just looking for anyone been in a similar situation. Do people really change for the want if it ? Or do I cut my losses before my daughter is old enough to realise?
Selling? Or using? Or both? If he’s been using for 10 years … he really needs help to overcome his addiction (and it won’t be you)! I do not care what his explanation to you for his abusive texts were!!! He does NOT have the right to divert the reality of his situation in making you out to be the bad guy. He can’t stand himself so he’s going to deflect his shittiness on you to make himself feel better! Please don’t wait around to see if “he WILL change”! You can separate yourself from him (unless, and until), he proves worthy of you and your daughter.
I had a similar situation when my oldest (now 36) was 3 months old. I got the hell out of there because my daughter didn’t deserve to grow up in that environment. I wanted her to NOT have ANY memory of what was going on. All 3 of my babies (now adults) were the catalyst for me enacting healthy decisions. If you can’t break ties with him for yourself? Break ties for her!
I truly hope you summon the courage to leave him and do what’s in the best interest of you and your baby-girl! Both of you deserve to have as much a peaceful life as possible.
Hit me up if you need someone to talk to. Best of luck always!
Just using, I say just but it’s as bad as any form of interaction with drugs.