Do we have to go through court for my ex to give up his rights?

I have four kids with my husband I’m just wondering …instead of going thru court and stuff is there a way he could just give his rights up?? I’m hoping he will. Only because he’s not a active dad and hasn’t been. We have 4 kids 5 and under and he’s gonna be going to prison for quite some time. I’m really hoping he will do that much instead of making me go thru tons of paperwork and court. We live in Montana…I don’t meet with a attorney til next week so I’m just kinda wondering how that work if he did it.


If hes going to jail he has no rights. And most states won’t let them sign off unless someone is willing to support the child. You can file a divorce with out a lawer


Why does it matter if he’s going to prison? He won’t be around anyway.


Its better to go through court. Make it all legal. Cause he can tell u he doesnt want anything to do with them and then 2 weeks later deny it all.


I live in Montana but have never delt with this hopefully the laywer can give you some insight!!

I don’t know I’m sorry


How are you going to support yourself & the kids while he’s in prison? Do you work?

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So hes STILL ur HUSBAND because I mean u just called him that… and u want to give up hes rights because he going to prison??? He seems pretty "active "to me being 4kids under 5 :woman_shrugging:


You’re not divorced it’s so much more complicated than that. No he can’t just give up his rights and unless he is going to prison for harming one of the children no judge will jump to that. Termination of parental rights is always a last step. He can actually take you to court for visitation on the states dime if he wanted to from prison.

Yes. You still need to file it through the courts, but if he’s not fighting it then they don’t require an actual court hearing (at least in my state)

He can’t be that inactive of a dad of you have 4 kids under. I would think if he’s not active then you’d have quit sleeping with him. Bit anyway, most states require the kids be adopted by another man that’s your spouse. He can also take you to court and have visitation in prison enforced.


You have to be divorced and it’s going to have to go to court, most states say you have to be remarried for 1-2 year’s and the spouse has to adopt the kids

In Wisconsin you have to go through court but they will not allow them to give up rights unless someone else is wanting to adopt at the same time


I guess so when he comes out he has no rights and she doesn’t have to deal with the arguments and court orders and not have to put the kids through more trauma

Nope. The courts wont bastardize a child. Someone has to be willing to step up. You cant just sign over your rights cuz u want to.

Call legal aide free advice or ask state welfare children’s services ? I’m sure you be directed in right way n legal for your state,

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Sorry i can’t give you advice since i dont live in that country an i didn’t have to get my ex to sign nothing for me to have all rights over here.But if he truly is a bad person do what you have to do.Good luck.

Signing over his rights doesn’t mean he can never come back into the child’s life. There isn’t much you can do to keep the kids away from him, he has rights as a father. Best to take it through court and have it done that way so you can get child support.he has the legal obligation to take care of his kids.

Just divorce him while he is in prison………

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To all the women responding negatively listen up. Just because she has 4 kids with the man doesn’t neccesarily mean he’s active with his kids. It means he was active with her. If he’s going to prison and he doesn’t care about the kids then she has the right to want him to sign over his rights. Her question is how to get this done, not your opinion on her life choices. I, myself, have 4 kids and going through a divorce from a man of 12 years. He was a mean and angry man that didnt care about our kids. I’m getting him for child support because we made 4 kids together, but that’s my decision. Back to topic, I’m not certain about your state laws, but I would wait to speak to an attorney and see what your options are before taking advice from people who haven’t been in this situation. If he’s going to prison and for a long time, then he won’t be able to pay child support and in that situation the judge may see fit that he will be better off signing his rights over. Again, that will better answered by an attorney.


Stop bashing this woman for having 4 kids with her husband. Shame on all of you… Acting like the amount of kids is the problem… It would be the same if they had 1, 4, 9, 17 kids together… They still belong to him at the end of the day. He is the problem. Not the kids. OP: Seek legal aide if he won’t willingly sign them over to you


So is there another person willing to take that role?

Ignore all the commentary by patronising, self-righteous twits and listen up. I live in Australia so am not terribly au fait with the American system, but I think I’d ask myself these questions:

  1. How long is he going away for and do I really need to take any steps straight away or even in the near future? Is there some sort of financial benefit for me in doing anything now?

  2. Do I get along with his family and do I need their support? Has his family been involved in the kids’ lives and are his family members good role models for the children? If his family has been involved and are going to provide ongoing support, think carefully about whether or not it’s a good idea to rock the boat. You can file for divorce without taking any action to sideline him as a parent. He’ll be sidelined for some time anyway because he’ll be in jail.

  3. What is it he’s actually done? Is it something that by definition vetoes him having any further contact with his children? Murder, domestic violence, any kind of child abuse, rape and any similar kind of crime would fall into that category. Plenty of other crimes, though, are no reflection on his ability to rehabilitate and be a decent parent. He may not have stepped up since his children were born, but that’s not necessarily to say he won’t make an effort upon release.

At the end of the day, unless there are extenuating circumstances children have the right to enjoy meaningful relationships with both parents as well as extended family. Any decision you make must be in the best interests of your children. I do feel for you. This must be such an awful time for you. Surround yourself with loving and supportive people and kick everyone else to the curb. xx


Check your local library for adoption book n see if there’s a page in it for parental right forfeiture…if there is copy it have him sign it go to court house n file it…

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I would go to the court house and just file for full custody u want to go through court so you can get state to help you raise those children when “he goes to prison for a very long time” depending how long maybe you could get full custody I don’t know and maybe his track record will help you but he is their father might check into abandonment rights too

Most states require a full year of both no contact and no support. You haven’t mentioned either, so why would you want to eliminate their father from their lives? Going to prison doesn’t indicate that he’s an unfit parent, & isn’t grounds for termination of parental rights, except in very rare instances.

Every state has a process for a parent to relinquish his or her parental rights voluntarily. It has the same effect as court ordered termination of rights. There is no child support after that point in most cases. They may not re-enter the child’s life without your permission, or that of the child(ren) at an age that varies by state. If you are not yet divorced, this may not, and most likely will not, apply.

I would encourage you to honestly answer the questions posed by the lovely, no-nonsense mother from Australia before taking any action,