Sooo, different kind of question. Do you mamas ever talk about your “troubles” with marriage or relationships with anyone? Or do you feel like their input can sway you? Help you? Be it a therapist? Your friend, family? Do you keep it behind closed doors? I’m trying to figure some things out regarding this and how it can potentially ruin relationships or help
I absolutely talk to my tribe about my relationship! I also see a therapist for myself but discuss my relationship with them as well.
It depends on if you are asking for advice or just wanting to vent. I always preface it with which I’m wanting. A lot of the time I just need to vent,so I dont want advice or them to get involved, just to let me word vomit everything so I feel less bottled up.
I have a good friend that always just listens to me,no judgement. And that’s what we need sometimes just to vent. I don’t have sisters, so she’s my go to person. Have always been there for each other for more than 30 years🙂
It’s never good to tell family or friends about your relationship . It can cause people not to like your partner . It is best to keep your relationship between you and your partner .
My best friend and me we talk about everything about our relationships, ex husbands, about our kids, our family members and other people… we always laugh about everything, I can understand that you don’t want to involve people in your relationship but is not how that works when you wanna talk.
I had gone to a few people regarding problems with my marriage the u have a guilt trip wondering if u did the right thing. If your spouse finds out u did the theres betrayal. I look at it this was if the problems in your marriage you simply cant discuss with your spouse it’s time to make a decision stay or leave one of the 2.Especially if counselling hasnt helped.
A good therapist is advised. They are not all good.
If its an abusive relationship? Tell everybody.
I do, but only with people i KNOW i can trust.
No. I talk about issues in my relationship with my husband. I’m blessed with a husband who values communication, honesty, and being a team. I do not take any issues with my husband to friends or family. If I ever felt like I was unable to resolve things with only my husband, I would consider professional counseling.
I talk with my therapist. Or my partner.
Sometimes my sister but more so when it’s a sittuation I know I’m being irrational in.
Issues in a relationship should be handled within the relationship. But venting to someone else can be healthy to just get it off your chest. But only to people of the opposite sex of your partner. Like I’m okay with my husband talking to his male friends, but talking about our problems to another woman is a huge no. And Vise versa.
Of course, it’s good to vent. Everyone needs a friend to vent to. But you gotta be careful who you are venting to. I wouldn’t with anyone of the opposite gender and I definitely wouldn’t with an ex (some people do )
oh heck yes. My Momma, my Best Friend, and my therapist are all well informed and updated frequently.
The only person that I have ever talked to about my relationship is my partner or our therapist as we all worked together to solve issues and it worked. I used to because I didn’t know what to do but In general outside influences are swayed by their biases or opinions towards your partner or opinion of you or their personal stuff and since they aren’t the ones in the relationship it doesn’t help.
Thats an emotional friendship. If its hidden from the spouse, its bad fir the relationship. If its not hidden, its probably ok, but could go either way. Insight, from the outside is helpful. Developing a bond closer than that with your spouse is dangerous.
It’s good to talk to others but I never try and drag my husband down and I think that’s important and knowing I’m talking to someone to find help in a situation instead of talking with someone just to gossip!
I’ve learned my friends are going to be on my side, family on his side, we talk to each other about what is going on and what is bothering us. If we cannot find a resolution to the problem in that moment we come back to it later on after we both have had some time to think.
My Husband and I have very good communication and always discuss are problems with each other. Sometimes I talk to my mom about little issues like if he annoyed me by not putting the toilet seat down lol.
My best friend. I message her and tell her everything. She lets me know if I’m being unreasonable or if I’m right. I’m pregnant rn so she lets me vent and calm down.
Nope. Been there n done that with my last marriage, only causes resentment towards the SO from everyone. If I got a problem I’ll address it with my husband and no one else
My hubby and I are completely different people as odd as it sounds lol but i always talk to my hubby, no matter what. But I also talk to my momma as I feel like I take everything to heart so I talk to her to find out if im over reacting
I do with my best friend. That’s it. She tells me straight up though if I’m wrong
My daughter n law comes to me to vent… Why, because I listen n granted it’s my son but I believe everyone needs a non-judgement ear… She knows I’m blunt n will tell her truth, give her my opinion, n not take sides. Sometimes we all need to vent to just have an ear n calm down… I’m honored to be her ear…
Some stuff I talk about in general terms with a girlfriend but the tough ones I make a Good and bad point list and that usually clarifies stuff for me
People cope in different ways. Me personally, I’m an open book. My marriage isn’t perfect, and we’ve been through alot, but in these 14 years, I’ve also learned alot. There isn’t anything I’m not willing to share from my personal experience in the hopes of it helping someone else. That being said, conflict is human nature, and people deal with it differently. Some vent and then get over it. Some hold grudges and keep tally of every little thing and play tit for tat. Some bottle it up, boil it, and explode later under the pressure. Some simply don’t even acknowledge or admit there’s an issue. The trick is recognizing how your partner deals with conflict and how you do, and then learning how to communicate issues with your spouse and work on it together. Do we always have the answers? No. Sometimes it is good to ask for outside advice when we don’t have any answers. If you’re going to share, it’s more important to have someone honest enough to tell you when you’re wrong and hold you accountable for your place in the conflict.
I tell two people in my life everything: my fiance and my bff of 15 years.
So if I cant talk to my man about it, I talk to my bff.
Anyone who is not a professional (therapist) is going to be biased one way or another and sway how you feel or deal with things in a potentially unhealthy way. It’s also going to affect the way the people around you (who you vent to) view your spouse or significant other.
I’ve learned the best person to talk to about relationship problems, is the person that you’re having the problems with. I’ve learned that talking to other people about your relationship problems invites more problems. If talking to that specific person isn’t an option or isn’t working, seek professional help. Someone outside that can look at the big picture. Ultimately though, if you can’t talk to the person you have the problem with, be that a spouse/significant other, friend, family etc… maybe you shouldn’t have a relationship with that person. If they aren’t willing to listen to what bothers you without it starting an argument or they just aren’t willing to communicate, you don’t mean to that person what you think you do.
A therapist is the best choice. Because you will get biased opinions from people you know. Also depending what it is you can change the feelings of that person towards you and your partner.
If there are issues with said spouse, talk to him/her about them. I frequently let my wife know (and vice versa) what troubles me. But always speak in a neutral to positive feelings. If something makes you upset, give yourself (and spouse) some time t o cool off so you can calmly state the problem without starting a fight.
I talk to a therapist, having someone to vent to who won’t go gossiping to my friends and family is nice. Some times you just want to let your feelings out into the universe without causing damage. I can’t say the therapist has helped me solve any problems but she has been there to listen and give me some validation that my feelings are logical and reasonable.
I sometimes vent to my two best friends but even then I don’t disclose everything bc your ppl will be one sided, sometimes u will forgive but your friends or family won’t, it’s ok to vent to somebody I can trust but know your limits! Best person to talk about your relationship issues is with your partner… sometimes that can be difficult but it’s better to nip in the bud and try to find a resolution but def sometimes a good vent or cry can make u feel better, but watch what u say, I tell my family nothing… I’ve learned that’s not healthy
I talk to my husband but to get another perspective, I talk to my friend. I’m an Army wife, so she’s able to relate but she’s extremely honest and if I’m the one who’s in the wrong, I trust she’ll let me know. But I definitely love that I have someone I can vent to and there won’t be any repercussions from it (ex. Husband being angry or family being angry at husband).
I have my BFF but we’ve been friends through it all… so it’s always do you wanna vent and burn the world down or real talk solutions. Never negative judgment between us.
Always talk to a therapist, find one that you feel comfortable with and helps you to figure things out, not just listen to you. If you have a family member or friend whom you feel doesn’t try to sway your opinions but talk them through, listen and you trust them 100% then talk to them if you want as well. From personal experience, I would not talk to family, sometimes they tell others or make a situation worse by twisting things up and making it more difficult for you to figure things out. It can also cause animosity towards your significant other from that familily member.
I talk things out with my husband. At one point in the early part of our marriage I’d talk to friends and family, it ended up making people pick sides and being rude when all I wanted was advice. They only got my side which wasn’t fair. A therapist probably isn’t a bad idea if you feel you need it, but keep everyone out of your private life. Talk to your spouse.
I believe the communication needs to be 1st between the couple…if u both dont learn to b honest w each other about how u feel and work together to find solutions for any issues between the 2 then its probably not the right person …bringing family into it tends to cause negative reactions…
It depends on the person and issue. I always talk to my partner but I like input from others too. Sometimes you dont see things for what they are when you’re in the middle of it. My ex was the type of person who believed our problems should stay between us. He was getting abusive (not physically yet) so keeping my worries between us made it easier for him to isolate and abuse me more. If I was able to talk to other people I could have been aware of his abuse much earlier. But I only talk to people that I trust. I dont go to anyone that doesnt like one of us. And therapy is expensive. If you dont need a regular therapist I dont see the point in going just for a minor problem. Especially if you dont have issues very often.
I have a best friend miles away in my hometown. Her and I text almost all the time. It could be all day and we skip a couple days and we pick right up from where we left off. Our conversations are just between her and I and we often talk about our relationships. She’s really good at picking up stuff i didn’t handle correctly and help me through it and I hope I do the same for her. I’m lucky to have a friend like her. If you don’t have one then therapy is a must.
I’ve found that it’s okay to vent to close fiends & family. But if all they hear is the negative it will impact their opinion of your significant other. They can resent them or outright not like them & make it known. It can cause problems all the way around.
No don’t do it unless it’s a counselor, family an friends can be one sided or they will repeat what you say an makes things worse. If a couple can’t discuss things together then you need real help. Never put others in your relationship
I wouldn’t talk to family they could take it the wrong way or talk to someone else about it and get things twisted
My partner and I discuss things. This is the most communicative relationship I’ve ever been in and it’s shaping up to be the best. I have a group chat with my 2 bffs from high school, we talk about EVERYTHING daily.
Just remember, not everyone is your friend. People have a way to turn words around to fit their narrative which is gossip.
I talk about it with my best friend. My husband and I have our difficulties but nothing serious so its more like venting.
I sure do!! With God!!!
Sometimes but not the intimate parts
Yes, my therapist. seriously though, people take things too far when all you want to do is vent. Half of them even go back and tell everyone else and gets out of control like a damn game of telephone. People suck.
I talk about any issues I have with my spouse so we can find a solution together. I don’t bring outside people into our relationship like that because friends and family can make bias remarks and cause further damage. A therapist is the only person I would seek out if ever necessary but my spouse and I are pretty good about discussing our feelings, disagreements and road blocks.
I have 3 very different bffs, with very different lives. Whenever I’m upset, crying, freakin out i am very thankful to have them for input. My sister though is SAVAGE, she is a doctor n always been more cold n calculated. I’m careful what to say to her! If I’m upset with my hubby n tell her something she always says stop being so pathetic, ughhhh crying over that stupid guy! Leave his ass, u can come live with me whenever:rofl: She then him!! Lol
I think its best to b careful what to tell families! They will hold grudges!!
Therapist.
And only 1 family member.
And a couple close friends.
Everyone needs an outlet. However the outlets chosen need to be good ones. My outlet is my brother, his job as my outlet isn’t to give me his feelings on the subject it’s to hear me out and let me vent unless I specifically ask for his advice he doesn’t give it to me. The only thing he will ever interfere with is if me or my kids are in danger. But the first outlet is always my other half
Keep it to yourself,only has the potential to blow up!
I have a therapist because I want to have more healthy relationships with the people in my life whether that means trying to be closer or letting them go.
My sister she is my best friend and never judges
Yeah I’d say keep the gossip to yourself, telling sometimes isn’t the answer. Examples, yeah
Don’t bother your therapist with too much mumble after a fe w good articles it seems like kirpooch
I have a trusted coworker who I talk to. She talks to me. Neither of us is ever rude to the other’s partners, even if our opinion was that he was wrong, he doesn’t need to know that we talked, it’s for our sanity that we vent to each other.
My best friend. No judgment just an listening ear and some advice that I can take it or leave it…again No judgment .
I talk to my mom and a few friends but not about everything. Just if something is bothering me.
I like to vent and get a new perspective. Especially if I need to be told I’m being dumb or overreacting. I will always talk to my husband as well, but it’s nice to gather your thoughts beforehand.
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I do with my sister and best friend. Sometimes I feel like I need validation for why I’m upset or things that bother me. Idk why but I feel I overreacte sometimes.
Meh, they don’t listen anyway, so no, not really and no one can sway me. I’m very in touch with my emotions. I’ve only ever said anything to vent, not seeking advice
I will talk about my marriage with my father and my sister because they know my husband well enough to know he is a good man no matter what happens. Sometimes I get angry and need to vent or maybe I need advice and they listen and don’t judge him for the things I say. They never automatically think badly of him
If you are in a emotionally abusive, physically abusive or financially abusive relationship then i encourage talking to a outsider. If you are dealing with a toxic unfaithfull partner then talk to a outsider. If it is something small or trivial talk to your spouse.
I don’t have any. My husband and I have great communication. We talk to each other about everything.
Never talk about your issues with your other half with anyone, but them. No one else needs to know your business
When i first read this I thought this was my own email sent to me #crazy NO I NEVER SPOKE TO ANY ONE ABOUT MY RELATIONSHIP UNLESS IT WAS FOR FREE HOUSING OR FOOD STAMPS UPDATES I NEEDED A THERAPIST INSTEAD I NEEDED ANXIETY MEDICATION AND ESQUITZOFRENIA MEDICATION (I GAVE UP!!!) AND I AM OR WAS THE SIZE OF THE DOORWAY SOOOOOOO NO