I was a young mom and never disciplined my daughter when i should of. She’s now 6 and I’m gonna jump out of a window because she argues EVERYTHING we say no to. I have no patience anymore. I tried teaching her to say " ok mom " and move on after i say no but nothing works. What do i do
11 Likes
Say what you mean, mean what you say and be consistent. Don’t send mixed signals.
10 Likes
You’re not alone. Nothing seems to work other than taking away his favorite toys and the tablet. But as soon as he’s back on that tablet he’s misbehaving and walking all over me
1 Like
I really wish I could help I have a 7 yr old who walks all over me and it sucks but the way things are going I think the parents are afraid to discipline because of the fear of getting the kids taken away and so they let stuff slide for all ages of kids
6 Likes
This isn’t the popular answer but I raised my kids when you could still give them a spat on the bottom. One time was all it took except for my only girl (my baby) who had the misguided idea of saying it didn’t hurt. They are all grown with kids of their own and are very respectful. You have to get it under control before she’s 13 and you’ve definitely lost. Think of it this way, if your child was running into the street with a car coming, would you want them to mind you when you told them to stop? You will be treated the way you allow someone to treat you including your child. Good luck Mama.
5 Likes
Say no. Don’t back down. It is never to late to start over with discipline.
5 Likes
I can see whose Fault is that
Yeah I’m wondering myself.
Cause I have a 5yo who listened well enough, kids are kids they’re gonna push back some. We could solve most issues with a hug and a talk…until we moved in with my highly narcissistic mother and when we moved from there, my old as the hills narcissistic grandmother.
I say no now and he screams, hits me, throws things. He won’t help with chores anymore. He’s hateful, disrespectful, a downright brat. Both my mother and grandmother constantly undermine my authority and question my intelligence, my mother brainwashed him and told him I didn’t want him.
Every time I set boundaries or rules, they both ignore them.
I’ve tried everything from time outs, to serious talks, taking away privileges, and my last line of resort was whoopins.
Nothing works.
If y’all figure it out, let me know. Im at the end of my rope.
“I said no. I’m not arguing with a __ year old. Now go in there and do it or there’ll be consequences.” Don’t back down mama. You’re the parent. If they can’t follow your rules or the duties you say they won’t follow what needs to be done in the real world. They will think they will get away with everything. Parents are supposed to prepare our children for the real world and it starts young in the home.
1 Like
I went through this with my middle son. And omg I thought I was going to snap. But you need to be consistent and direct if you say no then it means no ( not they keep asking and you finally give in, that is what he was used to). At that age timeout can still work, be prepared for the battle and lots of putting them back on the spot ( I used the stairs that I could see him and he could still see me but not the tv) they will fight and run but don’t give up or give in eventually they will know you mean it. Use few words when putting them back but once they have done their timeout I used a minute per age get down on their level and explain why you put them there and that you still love them but won’t put up with what they did to earn the timeout.
I watched a lot of super nanny and some of the stuff she said and did actually works. Consistency is importance
1 Like
Ok so it takes two people to argue, simply do not feed into the behaviour. Let her learn that she gets nothing from you when she speaks to you like that. But massively praise her when she’s respectful, kind etc. how about a reward chart to reinforce the positive behaviours. Most kids love a sticker! Then if she has been respectful etc for a week she gets a treat, doesn’t have to be a huge treat just something she can aim for. You have to praise her for the positives more than discipline the bad behaviours. You need strong boundaries
1 Like
Get a belt and snap it. That worked with mine. Never hit them with it of course the noise alone was enough
2 Likes
My daughter is like this and it is not due to lack of discipline, in say that because her brother is the complete opposite, he listens well, but she fights about everything, me and her dad have to constantly talk about literally anything she asks for because if one of us say no she will ask the other , even if it’s something as little as whether she can have a soda, if she is told no she will not let it go. It’s extremely frustrating but we have gotten to the point where if she doesn’t accept the answer and drop it she is sent to her room, unfortunately she is sent to her room and has her things taken away a lot. Also spankings do not have any affect on her at all so it’s not even an option.
Hopefully things get better 
Decide what the rules are, pick your battles. Children feel secure when they know YOU are in charge. Set consequences but you don’t need to be angry. Speak matter of factly, & follow through.
1 Like
My son is like this and was diagnosed with Opppsitional Defiant Disorder. He literally just fights me for everything. School, eating, bedtime, and brushing teeth are usually what he fights about. There’s many more though. I have no advice. He was diagnosed at 5 and he’s 10 now. I’m sorry, I have yet to find anything that works. Reward charts worked for a short time. I’m commenting mostly to let you know you aren’t alone❤️
2 Likes
A good swat across the bottom
7 Likes
You start setting boundaries and enforcing them now. It will only get worse if you don’t.
Ex: if I say no and you ask again then you get a strike. 3 strikes in the course of the day equals loss of privilege (electronics or whatever you child sees as a punishment)….
With my oldest grounding her from toy and electronics didn’t bother her. She was a book worm so the only thing that was remotely effective was taking away books for the day 
I’d start a slight spanking and put them in time out and taking away tv, iPad, and toys when they’re acting like this! Actions needs to have consequences.
3 Likes
Fight only certain battles make rules and stick to them
A big one in this house because I have older boys was no swearing and it was a dollar to the swear jar
My swear jar has been empty for a year now
“I said no! Go in there before you get me mad!” And then the countdown 
1 Like
Welcome to the world of tough parenting
Try taking away everything from her
And not giving in to her at all
Show her that her actions have consequences
Do you explain your no’s?
You start now. It’ll be a process but you can do this. Your job is to not set her up to fail.
So, decide what rules are absolutely non negotiable. Enforce them. Even when you’re tired, aggravated, ready to lose it, enforce them. Decide what punishments will hurt. Not physically but what does she love? Ipad time? Take it for a day as punishment. She wants to go out to eat somewhere, well, she was rude so eat at home. Her actions will have consequences. Stick to them.
You are the adult. She is the child. She doesn’t know best.
That said, “No is a complete sentence”. For every time she argues, she loses something for a day. If she really loses her mind, 3. Tv, electronics, anything she wants, take it if needed.
But, I always went and talked to mine about rules and expectations. I never just punished them with no explanation at that age. They don’t really understand. Our job is to help them understand that’s being mad, frustrated, sad, etc is fine but we don’t act the fool. We talk. We don’t hit, yell, scream, throw things, bite, kick, etc.
Be the mother/parent she needs you to be. Stop doing what’s easy bc you fail her when you do that. She is the priority. She doesn’t have to be perfect but she has to learn boundaries and respect.
That age is about control. Let her pick her clothes, what’s for dinner, what towel she likes after her bath. Little things help them feel like they have control over themselves and their environment. As she gets older, you can work out age appropriate expectations and adjust as needed.
You can do this. Love her enough to teach her. 
Follow Dr. Becky at Good Inside. She has an amazing book called Good Inside and a podcast. She’s on FB, IG, and probably TikTok. She’s amazing! I also highly recommend following Attachment Nerd and Happy Human Life. They’re all fantastic resources! But just so you know, you’re doing better than you think you are.
1 Like
Rule # 1 raising kids is like playing chess, know your opponent and anticipate their next 5 moves.
Rule #2 the moment that you engage in an argument with your child you’ve already lost!
Consistency is absolutely crucial. Make your statement and simply allow her to argue with herself or send her to another room. Do not respond to the argument!
Research Operant Conditioning.
You know your child and what rewards work for her. Negative reinforcement isn’t punishment as you can read about. Figure out what works for her and remain consistent. This will take both parents and other adults that she does this with to work together.
Good luck you can send a PM if you want to chat about it.
My nearly 8 year old argues with us when we say no or tell her to not do something, she answers back and everything and when she does she get she’d phone taken from her, her laptop and she’s not allowed to play outside
When I am on my ends with my 6 years old who does the same, I take away everything from him. And I send him to his room with not tv or anything. Also no grandma sleep over . And not pool. And when it doesn’t work. A little spanking in the butt or give him a cold shower , and he very quickly resets 
Refuse to engage in the arguments. Say your piece and don’t fall for crying or fit throwing. Walk into a different room if you need to. This along with taking favorite things one at a time helps a lot!
Be consistent and don’t give in when you say no. That will only teach her that if she throws enough of a fuss, you’ll crack. Eventually the fire will diffuse itself (for the most part) you’ll still get kick back from time to time, but that’s normal. If you want to give her the freedom to express herself without a huge argument (that’s within reason) have her debate on why the answer should be yes instead of no. Sometimes I allow my daughter to do this and she’s got some valid points. Sometimes it changes my answer, and other times it doesn’t, but at the end of the day, she shouldn’t be fighting with you. And I have a firm rule that if you’re screaming or crying about not getting your way, the answer will always be no.
1 Like
I’m old school. My mom spanked all five of us. (Spanked not beat). Guess what. We are all fine and we learned. In your case I would spank. Might be the only way she learns. Because if you don’t control it now you will have bigger problems in the future.
3 Likes
My daughter does the same thing and I’ve disciplined my kids… she’s a leader and wants to understand my reasoning and the why behind the decisions. But sometimes she’ll argue even knowing she’s wrong. Just to argue. Sometimes I just ignore it. To send her to her room. Or take her electronics.
A lot of soft parents in here. Spare the rod and spoil the child. If your child is young and running all over you it means you’re not a parent. You are a friend. Who cares if they don’t like it. Gentle parenting is not realistic.
1 Like
Find a behavioral therapist
6 years of no discipline can’t be undone in a short amount of time unfortunately but stay consistent, reward the good outcomes and be firm in your no, don’t get on her level and argue.
Around that age with my oldest we implemented a token economy system.
We sat down and wrote out behaviors we wanted to see, things he needed to do, and a small list of chores.
We made a separate list of privileges and rewards.
Then we figured up how much he’d earn for each behavior, action, and chore.
And using that we’d figure up how much each privilege and reward would cost.
So for example playing with toys cost 10 tokens… He got tokens for getting dressed, brushing his teeth, and eating his breakfast that equaled 10 tokens.
Most regular privileges didn’t cost that much but were set up so he’d do the things he needed to do first.
Standing them in a corner works, no playtime, no electronics, no TV. Sit them in a chair facing the wall. If they get up put them back. Earplugs work very well too ( for the parents)
You are going to work for years to undo the damage you’ve done by lack of discipline. Best of luck
1 Like
Tbf I think it’s jaut the age of the children, especially in this day and age now! Just don’t let them rule yoy, t
Y have to start when they are young or when they can understand. I didn’t discipline my son now he’s 33 don’t have any respect for me or women .or other people . you don’t want for them to be that
That child that people talk about.
Then people don’t want to be around even the grandparents. And you can’t have friends because of that child
She is testing you. Stand strong you are her teacher. It is not easy. Imagine her in school if she does what she wants,
Definitely none of that gentle parent crap.
You said it all. You didn’t when you should’ve. So now sadly you’re gonna have to get strict. She’s a child she shouldn’t be given the chance to argue. Also she isn’t gonna just blindly follow your commands because your the adult. Respect is earned not given js.