How Can I Explain to My 8-Year-Old That Santa Won't Be Bringing Expensive Things This Year?

Motherhood
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QUESTION:

"My daughter is eight and has a tablet and watches YouTube and sees richer kids talk about cool things to have…

She’s been making a Santa list with things like Apple earbuds and a laptop and Nintendo switch, and I’ve tried saying things like ‘remember it depends how good you’ve been’

I don’t want to ruin Santa for her yet, and she’s really never gotten gifts that cost hundreds of dollars, so I don’t know how to tell her she’s probably not getting any of the big stuff on her list…

Should I just wait and see how it goes on Christmas morning? I’m sure she won’t be a brat, but she’ll ask me why Santa didn’t get her those things?"

RELATED QUESTION: Should I not buy my daughter so many Christmas gifts due to COVID?

TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

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“I definitely wouldn’t tell her she’ll get those things if she’s good enough. Like, way to totally destroy a child’s self-esteem and make Christmas something bad.”

“I tell them Santa makes toys, not electronics.”

“Mine think we pay Santa. So how much we have will determine how much and what they get. (And it depends on how bad they are being. Not paying Santa for them to be bad when we can use that for something else.)”

“We tell our children that Santa can’t make licensed items due to copyright expenses. Electronics are too hard for the elves to make and retraining would take too long.”

“We make a Santa catalog (I cut pictures from Walmart and Target Christmas catalogs) and I put only the things we can afford for them to choose from… And they can pick 2 or 3 items each…”

“I told my kids Santa doesn’t bring expensive things. Those are things that are earned and saved up for. But we also do an allowance for chores. Don’t do the chore don’t get the money. I feel like it teaches them to earn things and I noticed if they save for it they appreciate and take care of it.”

“So from the time my kids were little, we always explained to them that Santa only brings things him & the elves can make in the workshop. He can’t make electronics (game systems, laptops, tablets, phones, etc.) So he doesn’t bring those. It’s really worked out for us. I started it w/ the intent that in case we couldn’t find something they asked for, or if we had a year where we couldn’t afford things like that, or in case some of their friends didn’t get those things but my kids did, their Xmas spirit wouldn’t be ruined. Now when my kids get a new game system or laptop or whatever for Xmas, they know it came from us, they know we worked hard to be able to buy it, and they appreciate it more. Honestly one of the best ideas I’ve ever had!”

“That’s why Santa only brings stocking stuffers to our house. I made that decision on my oldest first Christmas. That way if he doesn’t get that cool and expensive gift, we can explain that mom and dad just didn’t have the money for it at the time.”

“I tell my son Santa’s elves make toys, not expensive electronics. Those gifts come from family.”

“Maybe volunteer for a homeless shelter and teach her the gift of giving. Sure she may be young but kids are smarter than we give them credit for.”

“Tell her about what Christmas is really about: not expensive gifts but spending time with beloved ones. There’s gotta be a movie that can help you with that. If this doesn’t work, I would make an elf or Santa’s personal assistant write a letter telling you guys what it is all about, and explain this year is especially hard for everybody.”

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READ ALL ANSWERS BELOW:

58 Likes
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Mine think we pay santa. So how much we have will determine how much and what they get. (And it depends on how bad they are being. Not paying santa for them to be bad when we can use that for something else.)

8 Likes
3

Everyone differs. Some ppl buy a few expensive items or just 1 from Santa. The rest of the gifts you let the child know they’re from you

1 Like
4

Right I always do 1 bigger gift from me and smaller from Santa…

1 Like
5

I tell them Santa makes toys not electronics

19 Likes
6

Santa doesnt have the money to get every kid on earth those expensive things. Maybe start her on an allowance i.e. earning through chores etc so she can get some of those things herself.

2 Likes
7

Teach her about the reason for the season. Help out a needy family. My daughter once had mr give all her gifts to a needy family at church.

8

Maybe tell her that Santa brings toys for kids, that his elves don’t make electronics.

1 Like
9

Honestly we’ve always done only 1 thing from santa from their list or something we know they really like but under $20. Everything else is from us , any big stuff or more pricey stuff from us.
That way also we dont have to hide stuff once it’s wrapped

10

I do 3 gifts from Santa since that’s what baby Jesus got from the wisemen and they’re left unwrapped. Then I typically get them a few things and wrap them but on Christmas morning they think Santa brought all of it lol.

11

I told my kids that Santa only actually brings 3 smaller cheap gifts and the parents buy what they can afford to have more presents and some parents can’t do big expensive gifts or some years they can and others they cannot.

12

My house santa brings a stoxking and small gift. Our expensive ones are from us. Period.

1 Like
13

We tell our kids Santa’s elves can’t make things like that. If they get expensive gifts like video games they come from us, not santa.

1 Like
14

I have always told my kids that we pay Santa tax. Some kids parents have better jobs and pay more taxes so they get bigger stuff

15

I told mine that Santa doesn’t bring electronics, that’s a mom and dad gift.

1 Like
16

I just tell my kids Santa only makes toys, he doesn’t bring/make electronics! It has worked so far :clap:t2:

3 Likes
17

Don’t tell her its cuz she wasn’t good enough. We only do 1 or 2 maybe 3 small gifts from Santa usually like a doll n car or something but the big stuff comes from mom n dad.

2 Likes
18

I don’t allow wish list so no expectations.

19

We do one thing each from Santa. The rest from us.

20

There will be no Christmas for my family :frowning: due to COVID im barely making rent. I told mine because of COVID Santa will not be coming. If he went to all boys and girls house he could get sick! I’m going to have them write their letters to Santa and have friend ( who is a mail man) personal delivery a card from Santa. This is the best I can do and it hurts :frowning:

5 Likes
21

I say santa brings 1 and mummy and daddy still have to pay for the rest

1 Like
22

Santa brings small gifts that are left unwrapped and the stocking is filled. Not an electronic either. Expensive ones are always from the parents.

We also don’t do Santa but thats how my parents did it when I was growing up.

1 Like
23

I’ve always said that Santa bring you all one small present and mum/dad buy the rest but send them to Santa and if your good he will bring them all back but if your bad they go to boys and girls whos mum/dad didn’t get them as much, so it’s what the parents can afford x

1 Like
24

I definitely wouldn’t tell her she’ll get those things if she’s good enough. Like, way to totally destroy a child’s self esteem and make Christmas something bad :grimacing:

28 Likes
25

Santa brings one toy for my girls. Usually a stuffed animal or something the elves could make. We get the rest of the toys and they know that they get what they get.

1 Like
26

I’ve told my 4 yr old Santa brings one gift that’s it. The rest come from her hard working parents

2 Likes
27

I tell my kids Santa doesn’t bring expensive gifts that way he has enough to bring toys to all the kids…we also give them gifts from us that way they just think if another kid got something expensive that their parents probably bought it also helps if they snoop around and find gifts

1 Like
28

Tell them Covid is effecting him too lol.

29

We don’t do “Santa” instead on Christmas Eve they get their stockings & a gift bag with pajamas, slippers, & snacks. I wanna raise my kids to be grateful so this is the route I took.

1 Like
30

Santa never got the credit in the beginning for the big/expensive stuff. I worked hard for it and I wanted my children to see that

2 Likes
31

I tell my son Santa’s elves make toys, not expensive electronics. Those gifts come from family.

4 Likes
32

Santa brings stockings, a new pair of pajamas, a stuffed animal and a board game for the whole family. Ill be darned if the big man is gonna steal my shine lol

3 Likes
33

I have always told my kids(they are 9 and 2)That mummy and the rest of the family buy the presents and Santa picks them up to keep them safe and to make sure the kids are being good then he will bring them back to them.That way my kids know that I buy the presents but it keeps the magic of Santa.x

2 Likes
34

We make a Santa catalogue ( I cut pictures from Walmart and target Christmas catalogue) and I put only the things We can afford for them to choose from… And they can pick 2 or 3 items each…

5 Likes
35

We do big gifts from us and the less expensive from Santa.

36

My kids it one cheap gift from Santa rest from us what we can afford

37

You just tell her that Santa’s elves do not make earbuds.
Or you can ask her what she thinks they make in Santa’s workshop?
Play a game, you her grandparents her and just say let’s all make a list of 10 things we think they make in Santa’s workshop.
she will catch on that they don’t make Apple products and Santa’s workshop without you having to come out and tell her

2 Likes
38

I tell mine that Santa can only bring what the elves make by hand & elves can’t make electronics.

2 Likes
39

Find substitutes. Like wireless Apple pod knockoffs, maybe a used switch? My kids usually get big christmas’ I’m extra, I know. And I start buying in like June. but I did tell my 8 yr old to remember that because of covid a lot of kids parents lost their jobs this yr, we were lucky, Santa has to step it up for those kids so we’re gonna step it back. She gonna ask for 3 things she def wants and 2 that she wants but not as much or are smaller gifts

3 Likes
40

My kid(s) know that whatever santa brings mom and dad have to pay for it…

1 Like
41

No. Explain to your child that rich kids have expensive things because their parents buy them. Santa brings love and the Christmas spirit. Don’t make your child feel she is not good enough. :expressionless::expressionless::expressionless::expressionless::expressionless::expressionless::expressionless:

2 Likes
42

I told my daughter covid hit in Santa’s work shop , they need to social distance less time for work ! I said one big gift and a few smaller ones ! She was happy . I think get something they use smaller presents add up to a switch pretty quick

1 Like
43

This is exactly why the bigger gifts are from us and small items come from Santa. Kids understand why YOU can’t buy them expensive things but they don’t understand why Santa would bring one kid apple ear buds and another socks.

1 Like
44

I tell my boys that mom and dad pay Santa based on their behavior & our income. (They know we aren’t rich.) But I’ve found them to be more appreciative of what they get and that way when theother kids at school or on YouTube get expensive things from Santa my boys don’t feel as though they haven’t been good enough

2 Likes
45

My kids know Santa doesnt bring expensive gifts. They’ve never questioned it. They usually get 1 or 2 things wrapped from santa and then everything else is from family.

46

If your child still believes in santa I would let them know that do tacoville sanchez work shop is only making so many things so maybe if you get any money for Christmas we could save for what you want

47

Tell her Santa’s elves were sick

48

My children are allowed to ask Santa for 2 to 3 things in each item must be under $20. I tell them that Santa needs to save the more expensive items for kids who have moms and dads that can’t afford those items, but we can. Everything else is from us

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49

You tell the truth, that you can’t afford it.

1 Like
50

Tell her about what Christmas is really about: not expensive gifts but spending time with beloved ones. There’s gotta be a movie that can help you with that. If this doesn’t work, I would make an elf or Santa’s personal assistant write a letter telling you guys what it is all about, and explain this year is especially hard for everybody.

3 Likes
51

Just tell her that santa can’t always buy fancy things or else it wouldn’t be fair to other kids around the world? I honestly have no idea my son’s only 2 and doesn’t really get the santa concept

1 Like
52

I would tell her that Santa will gift her things based on what y’all think is appropriate for her age. I have custody of my niece and this is what I’ve told her. I told her that the parents get to talk to Santa about what he brings too, and that the parents get to help decide what is gifted. If that makes sense. Lol. Like, JJ asked for a brand new bike, which isn’t expensive but “Santa” already bought roller skates. I told her that it’s okay that she puts that on her list, but when I talk to Santa about what he may bring we’ll decide on what is gifted.

53

Honestly, I let my son make his list and put in his stocking Christmas Eve, then tell him he’ll get whatever Santa has available because he has to make sure he has enough for all the kids around the world. He’s almost 4 so I ask what he wants and help make his list but so far he just says ok mommy and that’s that

1 Like
54

I was brought up rhat Santa brought the stocking presents (cheap little ones) and everyone else bought the other things, 1. So that we/ other kids don’t think Santa loves them or us more because we or they got better.
2. So they understand that family worked hard for the bigger gifts and we appreciated them more, they weren’t “free” or magic :slightly_smiling_face:

I’ll be doing the same with my little one x

2 Likes
55

I mean, just tell her flat out that Santa doesn’t give expensive gifts.

56

My 8 year old is turning nine next month we broke it to them he’s not real but he was a long time ago and we’ve explained expensive things come from parents other kids just wanna sound cool and Santa got it :woman_shrugging:t2:

2 Likes
57

Time for honesty. You lead her to believe her behavior has complete determination over her gifts. Guess what she expects? A perfect gift. Now she won’t get it. Tell her you are broke and Santa is not real. Kids understand and accept the truth.

2 Likes
58

Tell her Santas elves got covid & couldn’t bring her things this year :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

1 Like
59

This is a tough one when some parents do allows expensive things to be from Santa cause you can tell her only expensive things come from you and her dad but if she ever hears one kid got this from Santa that is when it is hard to explain why she didn’t , this is why I have always made the expensive stuff from us. I usually tell my kids if they ask this question that depends on how good they were cause honestly I don’t have another answer :woman_shrugging: not everyone let’s their child believe in Santa now days so it’s gets difficult to try and keep the magic for my kids.

1 Like
60

I say Santa doesnt bring electronics mostly because I want the credit for the good gifts

3 Likes
61

Show her family guy’s Christmas time is killing us

2 Likes
62

I’ve always told my kids that Santa only brings toys. Electronics are bought by us so they better be good to get those.

Each kid gets a want, need, wear, read item from us plus 1 big gift for all of them to share. Santa brings 1 or 2 toys each.

1 Like
63

We tell our children that Santa can’t make licensed items due to copyright expenses

Electronics are too hard for the elves to make and retraining would take too long

7 Likes
64

Why’d you tell her it mattered how she behaved? Are you planning on buying her all those things for good behaviour? Poor kid is thinking Santa will if she behaves

My oldest lists expensive things but we told her to think practical, my kids have only ever gotten one thing from Santa and stockings

3 Likes
65

Go ahead and tell her Santa is you and your partner? Easiest solution, so she understands that these things aren’t magically appearing under the tree.

I knew about Santa at 6 or 7, never ruined the magic for me. We still did milk and cookies and had just as much fun as when we believed in the fat jolly ol Saint Nick.

66

In our house santa brings their stockings and mummy and daddy get the bigger gifts. We still keep the magic alive by doing letters and making them videos on PNP x

67

Explain Santa has been in quarantine and hasn’t been able to make as much money this year!

3 Likes
68

We tell our kids that we have to give Santa the money for the gifts he brings.

1 Like
69

I tell my kids (6&8) Santa don’t bring expensive gifts he brings you what you need. Clothing,some toys, etc that way wether I can afford to get them something expensive or not it’s not expected

1 Like
70

Big toys always come from us an smaller toys from santa, as I always thought of the poorer children not getting much, so I always thought let parents get the bigger presents, an santa stocking fillers

71

All i took from this was you tell her… Remember it’s all about how good you are… Soooo she is going to think she is not a good kid because she didn’t get the expensive toys and others did? You would let her think that over just telling her the truth?
My kids think Santa brings 1 gift and it’s always the least expensive so kids won’t feel like shit when they see what everyone else gets.

72

Due to COVID-19 Santa’s workshop was closed done and couldn’t make the expensive gifts because they take longer to make. So the only thing Santa could make enough for all the children are the following:

  1. Socks
  2. Underwear
  3. Mittens/gloves
    4.coats
  4. Shoes
  5. Any clothing item
  6. Books (coloring books, books to read, etc)
  7. Bag of favorite candy/favorite anything under $10

Just remember not everyone can spend $100 or more on 1 item. A gift from Santa should be something small that every kid might be able to get from Santa. Not every house has a lot of money. Keep that in mind. If another kid got a car from Santa and another only got mittens from Santa the one that got mittens might think they were “bad” or Santa didn’t like them.

2 Likes
73

I tell my daughter the truth that those kids don’t really own those toys and get to open new toys everyday. I tell her that those kids and their parents get paid to make these “commercials” so the toy companies can sell those things to other kids. And that’s it’s like watching a tv show or a movie and isn’t really real. You could also add that Santa’s elves don’t make those expensive electronics toys and mommy and daddies buy those if you want to say that.

74

Expensive gifts have always come from us. Essentials and one toy have always come from Santa. It would break my heart for my girls to go to school and brag that “Santa” got them a new switch or dollhouse when a less fortunate classmate might have only gotten socks or a jacket.

75

Tell her what I told my children, that some parents add to what Santa buys, that is why it seems like some kids get more expensive items from Santa than others, there are even parents that pose as Santa to make up for their kid being on the naughty list. I personally feel that parents should have just the stocking and one simple gift from Santa and take credit for the good gifts.

76

They have off brand air pods $20 amazon and then ask what her most wanted item is and maybe do that.

77

You can tell them babies, Santa is on a budget this year. He’s been stuck at home too. My mom always tell us Santa couldn’t buy us expensive gifts because there are a lot of kids he has to visit. Some only get one gift. We learned to be grateful even if we didn’t get what we wanted.

2 Likes
78

Explain Santa has to be fair to all the children so he can’t do expensive gifts, those are for mom and dad to buy and unfortunately we need you to limit your gift list because we can’t afford all those things.

Also please don’t tell her things like that depend on “how good she’s been” she’s going to think she was bad and that caused her not to get those things

1 Like
79

Santa bring a my girls two things each. A larger toy and a smaller one, with some candies. All other gifts come from mom and daddy.

1 Like
80

In our house santa brings only one gift.
The rest are from mom and dad.

2 Likes
81

Santa doesn’t make expensive electronics like phones, computers and game systems. He only gives things that he makes.

82

I always told my guys we had to pay Santa…so the elves got paid.

83

They have many ear buds that look like the apple ones.

There are ways around this.

You can do the something to read, something to wear, something you want, and a surprise gift.

Tell her in her list things can’t be over x amount

84

A post I read once explained to the kids that the parents have to contribute $$ to Santa’s cost of building the toys. Things like iPad etc are expensive to build so those parents have to pay that to Santa. Kids who get less expensive gifts are because that’s what the parents could have Santa build, they the less expensive toy didn’t have anything to do with how good they had been that year. This helps kids feel like they aren’t less than other kids or they aren’t “bad” because Santa didn’t bring an x-box or iPad.

1 Like
85

Santa’s toy factory was also affected with Covid so not a lot of very nice toys were made by the elves this year…

86

I told my boys that if it wasn’t something the elves could make then mommy had to send Santa the money so he could buy their presents. It helped when I was a single mom with 2 little boys who wanted game systems and computers.

87

No advice tbh my kids have been told that Santa doesn’t bring the expensive gifts that they came from mom and dad

88

My family always got us little things, and one big family gift that was marked to the family from Santa. It the big gift was something everyone used. Like, an xbox, xbox 360, Wii, whatever the case that was the big gift.

89

Only the stocking is front Santa, so basically candy and tiny things, maybe a puzzle or book. Everything else is from us.

1 Like
90

Deals for kids is an amazing group got my daughter some great gifts already

2 Likes
91

Had the same thing with my boy (9) earlier. I over heard him telling his cousin Santa was bringing him the new Xbox this year: I explained, as I do every year lol, that Santa only brings toys because that is what elves make. Expensive electronics etc come from us cx

92

Santa has never brought the expensive gifts here. We do. :woman_shrugging:

93

So from the time my kids were little we always explained to them that Santa only brings things him & the elves can make in the workshop. He can’t make electronics (game systems, laptops, tablets, phones, etc.) So he doesn’t bring those. It’s really worked out for us. I started it w/ the intent that in case we couldn’t find something they asked for, or if we had a year where we couldn’t afford things like that, or in case some of their friends didn’t get those things but my kids did, their xmas spirit wouldn’t be ruined. Now when my kids get a new game system or laptop or whatever for Xmas, they know it came from us, they know we worked hard to be able to buy it, and they appreciate it more. Honestly one of the best ideas I’ve ever had! :rofl:

4 Likes
94

Santa should never bring expensive gifts. As other kids won’t understand why one kid got a switch and the other a pair of socks.

95

Stockings are from Santa, presents are from mum and dad and family.

1 Like
96

My kids are told that Santa brings one small toy and mommy buys the rest. He brings big toys to kids who’s parents can’t bring them things

97

Santa doesn’t bring expensive gifts to my house. If they get a big gift I always say it’s from mom and dad so they don’t tell their friends that Santa brought them something expensive. Not a lot of parents can afford expensive gifts and I don’t want other kids thinking that Santa does not value them because Santa did not bring them something expensive. So our Santa gifts our generally under 30 dollars.

2 Likes
98

Kids are kids only once, in this shitty world we live in now they believe in something so great…shop black Friday, get 1 thing off her list, she doesn’t need everything! It might be a few less smaller gifts but she will be happy

99

And this is why I’m not telling my kids some magical fat man exists bc they’ll be wondering why he doesnt give them the crap the stupid idiotic rich scumbags get

1 Like
100

I’ve been telling my kids that Santa can’t make big, expensive things because him and his elves can only build so much for every other kid. Electronics take extra time and takes away from other kids.

It’s tricky because some parents don’t understand that kids may feel like they weren’t good enough for Santa and that’s why they didn’t get what they asked for. It’s really because not everyone can afford those things. My kids are being taught differently.

This year, Santa brought some peppa pig lol

1 Like