If he was a good dad, encourage him to visit her regularly. Parents are the most important people in the mind of a child. Its devastating to lose one. Have patience, she needs you. Plan fun things to do together
I am in almost the same situation as my sons father left us over 3 1/2yrs ago and my son still feels as I am going to disappear just like his dad did. He still sees his father on occasion and talks to him (FaceTime) but still believes I will leave him. I reassure him all the time that I am not going anywhere! Good luck with everything and definitely keep reassuring her 
So her parents just shattered the entire world as she knows it and you want her to just “get back in her own bed”? I mean good for you for leaving a relationship that wasn’t serving you, but have some compassion for your kid.
Try patience and understanding, continue to reassure her, and probably get her some therapy.
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Don’t focus on the own room thing. I know its overwhelming and u could use some space right now too but your kid is your priority right now. Make sure if he’s a decent dad that she can see him and know he didn’t leave her. Worry about making her world feel safe again. Imagine how scary this is and why she feels like she can’t let you go. It’s heart breaking.
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Her entire life was just flipped upside down. Unfortunately you’re just going to have to be patient and understanding of how she feels… it will take time for her to trust you will not leave her too.
Best you can do it just validate her feelings, and show her that you will not leave her. It will take time. That is all you can do.
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My daughter is four and still has this issue. I can’t even go throw the trash outside which is literally 4 STEPS AWAY FROM THE DOOR. It makes me so sad about her abandonment issues because her father only comes around every 6 months for one visit.
Please take her to an experienced child counselor. Those are big feelings that a professional can help with
You can’t. Just be there for her and let her get snuggles. She’s experiencing abandonment, separation anxiety, and just went through a traumatic experience. She needs every ounce of love met on her terms of what that feels like for her. You are going to have to rebuild that safe, stable environment that has dissolved for her.
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Not your fault. Easy fix, just be there at every turn for her and she will soon realize momma is good to stay. Kids learn by example.
I told my 3 year old daughter that we’ll stick together no matter what. Made it fun by explaining that when candy gets sticky, that’s what we’ll be like. She added toasted marshmallows to the mix. For years we’d tell each other we’ll stick together like sticky candy and toasted marshmallow. She recently reminded me of this during a traumatic experience she was having, and I reaffirmed that yes, we’ll be sticking together no matter what. It made a huge impact.
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My parents separated when I was 6 and I couldn’t understand why, no matter how many times they explained it to me. To this day I still remember thinking I would never see the other again when it was alternating visits. It was a lot. They both sat me down (and I vividly remember this too which is weird) and told me they both loved me so much and they are never going to leave me but they needed to not live together anymore and that it wasn’t my fault. It’s going to be hard for a while until she is old enough to really understand what happened. It’s not my business about how civil you are with your ex, but maybe that’s something you both could try.
Get her daddy back in the picture and this wont be an issue. She deserves her parents together.
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First of all it’s “me and my ex” or “my ex and I” not “I and my ex”. Proper grammar, it’s important.
Second of all how old is your daughter? She seems pretty young to be having these types of thoughts so you need to ride it out and just deal with her being attached to you for a little while until she’s convinced HERSELF you won’t leave. You’re in a tough situation and unfortunately your daughter is feeling the full sting of it.
My only advice I’d time! She’ll finally feel comfortable seeing that you’re always there!
My daughter is 5 her dad and i have always been together and neither parent has ever left. We’ve had a babysitter once when i had her sister and she’s terrified I’m going to leave her. Good luck mama!
Sorry. That’s a really shitty situation. Don’t question the choice you made. You need to be happy too. Maybe look into therapy?
Well she probably needs to go to therapy. For the apparent abandonment issues(which is normal in this case). Hopefully you can get them in sooner where ever you live, because here childrens therapy is a 3month wait, thanks to covid. But make sure you do it, because if the abandonment issue carries over to adulthood its not gonna be good.
I don’t know where this answer came from. But the answer to your question is… Buy her a necklace, that starts days forever here. To reminder her that mom isn’t going anywhere. Then tell her the truth of why he left
My baby sister (5yo) really likes my baby’s father. We recently broke up and she knows what a boyfriend and girlfriends are so I just said. “You know how people have boyfriends or girlfriends?” She replied that she understood and then I said “well nito isn’t my boyfriend anymore. But he’s still going to come over and see baby L all the time”
Find your own way to explain it to her that she will be able to wrap her little head around it.
It her age and she is right nothing is forever
Reassuring her or she may be useing it as a guilt trip on you
sounds like she’s got some separation anxiety going on there. My son had separation anxiety really bad when he was young. He is not my biological son. He’s adopted. His biological female birth parent abandon him before he was even two months old I’ve had him since he was two months old, he’s 27 years old now and he still as some separation anxiety. It’s gotten a lot better throughout the years I was where you are at one time legit where I couldn’t go anywhere without him we couldn’t even get a babysitter for him. When he started early learning school it was very hard I had to send this Dad to school with him and when he said grade school I had to go to the school at least twice a day in what past his room or Pekin just so that he could see me. He was also Allowed by the school to call me once in awhile during the school day. When I went to work he would call me off and on throughout my whole shift. When I would call him and tell him I’m on my way home now. He would call me every 5 minutes and ask where are you now Mommy and he wouldn’t go to sleep until I got home or until he knew I was close by. When he was old enough to go to day camp I started him out just with the day camp for 1/2 days, then worked up to leaving him the full day at the camp. When he was okay with that we started sending him to the overnight camp and he would call me from there. After he get more comfortable with that and knew I’d be there to pick him up in the morning we work two men two the weekend camps and from there we went on to sending them up for a whole week and then two weeks. And yes he still had separation anxiety but as long as he had a way to get in touch with me he was fine. We talked to the store and we had gotten him a cell phone that she could carry while he was in school but it’s only would call my phone an emergency phone and my sister’s phone he couldn’t call his friends on it but the school allowed it as long as he understood he had to ask the teacher first if he could call his mom. separation anxiety is really a hard thing to deal with and sometimes it never goes away but it will get better you just have to constantly make sure that she knows that you’re not going to leave her. I have to right now my son who is 27 years old and still lives at home because it’s too expensive here to live on your own and he doesn’t want to live with anybody else and as long as we have the room but I think there’s a little bit of separation anxiety there to still and then I have and adopted dog also who has separation anxiety and we’re working on that right now. I also got a psychologist for my son you might want to think about talking to someone. It does help. I thought I was going to lose my mind for a while there trying to deal with it but being able to go in with my son and talked with the psychologist helped a lot. Good luck
How old is this child & was BF her biological dad?
It will take time. You will need to show her you will not leave. It take time
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Therapy even for kids is a good thing
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Please take her to therapy…with you!
Have her dad come so she sees hes not gone forever poor baby
Persistent consistency. And therapy.
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Time consistancy and reassurance.
If it helps at all my almost 3 year old is attached to me and I cant leave the room without her and her dad DOES live with us !. So might just be a phase shes going thru?
My daughter did the same. Just love her through it. It gets better.
How old is she?? Sounds like separation anxiety…
It will just take time be patient 
I think you should wait it out and just support her. The only life she knew is gone. She feels abandoned. She needs you to understand that and reassure her until she feels better. Just part of the process after leaving a toxic home. You did that. Now it’s time for your kid to heal. Good luck.
Haven’t read any other responses but after dealing with something similar with my son, the quick answer is this: TIME
Give your daughter time to realize that you aren’t leaving because her world/life as she has known it has changed and as resilient as kids are, they don’t all adapt and adjust the same.
It took my son a couple months and as frustrating as it was, no amount of saying I wasn’t leaving forever made a difference. He had to actually realize it and TRUST it.
My son is almost 6 and he was 4 when we went through this. It’s gotten so much better and as happy as he is to see me when I get home, he doesn’t give me leaving a second thought.
This is normal behavior especially for children who’s one through this…it will get better…I did counseling with mine
Sounds like she needs to see her dad and spend time with him. Just because you ruined the family by ending it with him, doesn’t change the fact he still is and will always be her father. She needs as much (if not more) time with him than you.
She needs you right now and she’s expressing it. Be there for her and understand it’ll be tough!!
Jeezus…just give her time to heal! What’s the rush?! She’s only little for a short time!
Time. Give her time and validate her feelings.
She needs. Counselling
She needs counseling!!!
Give her time and extra love momma 
I was this lil girl. When I was younger. I had separation anxiety from my mother being away, bad. My mother had a difficult time. W me & my brother was a baby. I had a great babysitter when my mom was at work. When she was at home. I got really bad anxiety, I would be nervous, fidget. To the point I would pick my cuticles until they bleed, I would pick my lips. I think if my Mom had got my counseling, it would’ve helped. I would’ve gotten appropriate coping skills to help navigate my brain. That just because my mom is out of my sight, doesn’t mean she won’t eventually show up. Some sort of counseling will help
Make sure you tell her she did nothing to make her dad move. My ex were together 11 years and broke up. We have a son and made sure he knew he didn’t do anything to cause the break up and his dad moving out.
I would only let my daughter sleep in a sleeping bag on floor by my side and she was happy with just having me close by her.hope this helps
Depends on her age. When I moved in with my now husband I sat her down at the age of 12 and explained to her that my love for her is unconditional and will never change because of who I’m with she will always be my #1.
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I always tell my little.one I’ll see u later not bye. To me bye says I’m not coming back for a while. Whether its bringing her to grandma’s school daycare whatever. I always try to make sure not to use the word bye. To me sends the wrong idea
My little girl is 2 and even though hasn’t been through the same situation will not leave my side snd is my little shadow wherever I go. I think it’s a developmental stage all go through regardless of the situation. Hugs,reassurance snd I have found leaving her for short bursts (toilet/oven on etc) have all started to work xx
If this is the damage that results in a toxic relationship ending, imagine the results from him staying. Like the other moms said; time, patience and reassurance. Imagine all the pain she would have went through watching you guys fight constantly, thinking its ok to treat spouses with total disregard, she is much better off grappling with these temporary feelings than a lifetime of bad examples. You made the right choice for your daughter. Later on, she will have realized what self worth means, and what happens when a bum of a man happens to enter her life. Her mom showed her how that is dealt with. 
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This could happen with any child regardless of whether the father is present or not. Its just a stage of development the child is passing through. Keep reassuring the baby.
A ton of time. Maybe even therapy. My son has a very similar issue and it’s HARD. just remind your child whenever you’re going Stonegate that you’ll be right back. You always come back, right? And you always will come back.
It’s crazy how we as adults don’t think about others when we make dumb decisions. The wrong decision can hurt so many people . The little people don’t deserve to carry the pain we cause but unfortunately they do .Many prayers sent your way:pensive:
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My son is 9, myself and his dad split when he was 5 and his anxiety went through the roof! I’ve been trying to get him help since and have finally got an appointment. All I can suggest is to reassure her that you won’t leave and I find letting my son know if I’m going out to the shed or even in another room helps him even if he does follow.
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Taking her to counseling is the best way. That way she can learn the tools she needs to heal from the trauma of the split. It will help you learn the tools as well
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There’s an episode of Daniel the tiger. I am not sure of the name but the theme was grownups(you) always come back. I would watch that with her and always remind her that you will ALWAYS come back for her and to her.
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That’s why you don’t bring every man you decide to date into your kids life unless you’re pretty positive that’s gona last. Sorry that’s your fault and you put her in this position. Get her therapy. And never do that crap again
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Reassurance and consistency. Something similar happened with me and my son. It took him about 2 months or so to realize I wasn’t going to leave him and when I said I would be back I would be.
I would take her to counseling tbh
Definitely a lot of anxiety that has to be dealt with. Find a good therapist for her.
We got two puppies and told him he could take care of them and they could sleep in his room…worked like a charm.
Counseling would help
She needs counselling
Make a picture blanket with pictures of you and her. When you have to do something small, bathroom, mail, dishes ect. Get her to sit and cuddle with it. Explain that you need to do this thing quickly and she can cuddle with the blanket until you get back. Make it a comfort blanket. Good luck 
Wow, this is literally exactly like what I went through with my daughter. Same exact situation. What I did was I always said to her “mama is ALWAYS coming back.” No matter where I went. Into the kitchen. The bathroom. The store. To work. Dropping her off at daycare. I made sure to ALWAYS tell her when I was out of sight. I’d make her repeat it back to me as well. Nonstop. The more she spoke it and heard herself say it, she believed it. After a few weeks, the separation anxiety diminished. She would run out of the car to school and she’d look back and say “mama always comes back?” And as always, I’d say “ALWAYS.”
Have her speak it into the world and hear herself say it until she believes it. She’ll slowly ease back into feeling more comfortable with any separation. There’s also a book on Amazon called “Mama always comes back” as well and I would read that to her at night.
Feel free to message if you have any questions or I can help more! Sending love. It’s not easy but you can do it!
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Jamie Lyn Tagliamonte any advice
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The above suggestions are good. Depending on age I would consider counseling as well. I had a client like this and he had severe anxiety about if his mom would leave him because dad did. She couldn’t check the mail without him freaking out either
Be open with her and let her daddy come see her so she knows yes he leaves but he also comes back. Kids understand more then we give them credit for. Talk to her about what’s happening!!
It’s jjst gonna take time. I had 4 kids when we split they were all in 1 room, then I bought a five bedroom home and they were all in mine. She will go back to her own room, when ahe feels safe, it’s nothing that can rushed. Hang tight momma, be strong you’ll both get through this. 
You made the right decision. You can’t stay with someone that is not faithful. WHY would you ever put up with that? Give her something of yours to hold on to when she leaves and she will feel like you are with her.
Give her time to adjust.
You have to be patient and let her sleep with you and follow you and do whatever it is that makes her feel secure. How old is she?
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It’s time to get her into therapy. This behavior is affecting her life and she needs help
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It’s a big change. She needs you right now, let her go with you wherever you go, sleep in her bed with her until you know she’s asleep. Let her sleep in your bed for a few days if that’s what it takes. Be patient and calm. Once she knows she’s okay and you are there she will return to normal/find a new normal.
Look for a kid’s book that describes your situation(whether she sees dad, where she see dad, and that she lives with mom) and make it part of the daily and nightly routine
I put my pocketbook on the chair next to my sons bed. And said mommy never goes anywhere with out my pocketbook so it can stay next to you every night
How old is your daughter?
A lot will depend on that and how much you tell her.
She needs counseling and therapy to help her deal with her feelings!
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