My sister in law and I do not get along. For some reason she has always hated me, she even hated the fact that I got pregnant for no reason. Now, 5 years later, I am basically begging her to come around for my kids sake so their cousins can come play. I am at a loss with what to do, she doesn’t like me for unknown reasons and I am okay with that. I just want our kids to play together and grow together. What should I do?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. How can I get my sister in law to come around?
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Nah don’t beg people to be apart of yours kids’ lives
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I would leave it alone. They’ll be fine not having cousin play dates. My younger 2 barely know their cousin.
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Just let it go tbh. Can’t force people to like you or be around.
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Tbh, you can’t make people be who you wished they were. You have to accept her for who she is. Invite her to stuff so she knows she’s welcome, but don’t be disappointed if she doesn’t show. It’s her choice to not be a part of their lives, not yours.
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Let it go. Don’t force people to be in your kids lives family or not. If they wanted to be included they would be without having to constantly ask. They are better off not having half ass people in their lives 
I’d be upfront with her, hey I know you don’t like me but can the kids hang out sometimes? I want my kids to have a relationship with their cousins.
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My SIL is the same. Unfortunately I have just come to the realization that my daughter will never get to know her cousins. It’s so sad for her.
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I agree with others, just let it go. You shouldn’t want to beg people to be a part of your kids lives.
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Yeah can’t force anyone to like you or your kids 
and if she want to be that way let her be bitter and let it go and just know that your better than stooping down to her level. Take your dignity and go. Because we don’t have time for fakes . And you don’t want fake energy either 
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You ignore her, give her the same treatment as she gives you and move on.
If you have to beg for her attention, she’s not a friend or family, and not someone to be around your kids.
Don’t push fake horrible people onto your children
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Yeah mines the same way but my kids are way older they only see her on birthdays and one holiday a year
It’s better to keep to yourself if they don’t come to you it’s their loss been dealing with this since day one I once was in your shoes and now I love the distance keep being a good mother and living your life and they will regret every bit of it one day just out do them in everywhere possible by staying true to you and your self respect is my best advice that way when they want to come around it won’t bother you one bit and won’t affect you but them and have them like damn maybe she wasn’t all tht bad I’ve been with my husband 11 years we have 3 kids n we are just fine my husband stays away in support of me not because he doesn’t want his family he put it this way if they can’t respect you and your children then they don’t respect your husband and tht is enough for me that’s how my husband put the bigger picture for me
Don’t force nothing.
Leave her be and live your life. If she cares about your kids let alone hers….she would make efforts to be part of your kid’s lives. If you ask me they’re(Your kids) better of without her. 
Confront her and ask her why, tell her that you are fine with her not liking you but you’d like the kids to be able to know each other. 
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You’ve tried. Let it go now. You made an effort, you can’t force people to want to be a part of your kids lives, firsthand experience 
Why did u wait five years later , you should have reached out before hand. And worked out your differences.
If it’s meant to be she will find away. Don’t waste your time!
Ask why she hates you
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I wouldn’t force it. I didn’t like hanging out with my ex sister in law because her personality was exhausting. She was very extroverted and constantly wanted me to be the same and “get out of my comfort zone”. I just found her to be too much and I couldn’t hang out with her a lot because she would just dominate every conversation all of the time. I didn’t dislike her, I just couldn’t hang out with her in long periods. Honestly just leave it.
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Why try to force something when she isn’t interested?
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Some things are better left alone. If she was to be in your life you would probably have a heart ache ahead.
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No need to follow through. She should care as much as you do. If she doesn’t then let it go. Life is so much better surrounded by those that don’t need to be pushed to be a part of it.
Move on. Lol my exs sister was the same. Even wrote in an email that she hoped our daughter would come out R word.
We’ve been separated over 6 years and I’ve been in my relationship for almost as long. Made my daughter feel bad for wanting to spend her spring break with me. Absolutely nothing to do with her but still. Unhappy people suck.
Show her this message 
Forget it, most likely not going to happen.
You are better off without her. Who needs or wants frien-emies? She can F off.
Don’t. You don’t beg anyone for anything. Live your life and let her live hers.
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Why force it if she doesn’t like you lol. Forcing that isn’t going to ever make the kids relationships better. Just cut her out of your life and move tf on
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I would ask her or have your husband to find out.
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Leave it and let magic happen.
Leave it alone. Don’t worry about her. It’s nice but she isn’t worth the effort you already made. Some people just don’t get along
I have the same issue. After years of trying to address and fix the issue after so much disrespect I finally had to cut my losses. Didn’t even know what the issue was to begin with but me standing up for myself and biting back once was enough for her to be done. So done it is. I even tried being the bigger person. Celebrated her pregnancy and kid when she never could for mine. Deliberately chooses to be out of my kids life. I wasted more breathe than it was worth and lost more relationships in the end trying to save it. I don’t recommend that. Just let it be.
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Just ask her face to face what is her problem with you.
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Sounds like I wouldn’t want to be around her. Kids get older, they’ll connect.
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Just ask for the kids 
she doesn’t have to be there but the kids can still play.
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Mine hates me because I stole her brother away apparently and she says he has nothing to do with her but he told her to her face that it’s the ways she acts and treats are kids it’s been 5 years so I feel you but tbh it isn’t worth the sweat momma if they want to be there then they will be if not the kids will know why later on in life just like my family growing up
Leave it how it is she the one Miss out
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Every one of my ex-husbands’ family didn’t like me. All of them. The marriage ended with him cheating 8 years in.
We now have a 10 year old kid, they are not ever a part of her life. Which bothers me sooo much!
They are a very respectable morman family.
You can’t please everyone. If you love your husband, let that be enough. Move like overseas so you don’t have to deal with them much. Goodluck.
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don’t let her come around? She’ll drag you down more and screw up all the kids
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Just let it go!! My dumb ass sisters are very toxic!!
Family isn’t necessarily blood, it’s the people that want to be part of ur life and treat u respectfully that u should call family. Spend time with them.
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Set up playdates that don’t include her
Offer to pick the kids up and drop them off or something
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U could have your husband or her husband/boyfriend bring the kids to see your kids she doesn’t need to b there.
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I also vote to leave her alone. Pushing is just gonna make it worse. She knows how you feel so just back up. If she changes her mind you’ll know it.
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What does your husband say about everything? Maybe he can give you a little I site about her, and you can use that to connect with her, what are her hobbies/interest?
I would invite the kids to do whatever, and then be like oh and you’re welcome to come also…
Or, if she is married offer you babysit one evening for a date night…
Good Luck!
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I hate that for some of you women that has to go through that because what’s the point? It’s gives me weird incest obsessive vibes tbh
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Pick your kids cousins up & then drop them off if she won’t come get em.
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Just ask her what’s up
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Sometimes there isnt anything you can do. I have a sister in law who hates her husbands whole family. First day she ever met me she told me ill never be welcome around her kids if she has a say because of my mother in law. I married into her (my mother in laws) family so her my sister in laws hate somehow goes to me and my husband. All due to made up and some true stories of how my brother in law was raised by my mother in law but shes definitely has changed as im with her constantly and shes nothing like the stories told me when she was a bad mom and drunk… i understand my brother in laws hate but he doesnt hate his mom! He loves her and wants his kids to see her he even sneeks them over to grandmas on rare occasions. Our kids even go to the same school. Her kids favorite uncle is my husband so in all reality its just hurting the kids the most😭 its frustrating but nothing you can technically do besides NEVER stop trying to show the kids you care. If you ever randomly see them, yell that you love and miss them! But dont go to her house or harass her in anyway or you could get in trouble…
Honey do what I did just forget about it none of my in laws are part of my kids lives honestly my kids don’t miss them at all. My sister in law has been to one of my son’s birthdays he is almost 13 and one of my daughters almost 8 my mother or father in law have never been neither has my brother in law. Honestly if they don’t want to come around don’t force it their the ones missing out not your baby
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You could invite her for coffee and discuss it, without anyone there. Being an adult is hard work and opening up lines of communication is terrifying, but sometimes we have to pull our big girl pants on and deal. For the sake of your kids. It may help. Good luck 
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Wow she’s cheating her kids out of knowing theor cousins 
sad 
You can’t make someone care, but you can put it in God’s hands!
She is not worth your time, find a play group with people who want to get together.
It’s not worth the anguish or stress
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Not beg or ask anymore. If she doesn’t want you and her niece/nephew around, that’s her loss. You should never beg someone who doesn’t want to be there to be around. But If that’s not what you want to hear, talk to your partner about it. It’s his family and he probably knows why she doesn’t want to be around
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Don’t worry about it it’s her problem.
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You can only control what you do. You cannot change her mind.
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I’m an only child. I’m married to the oldest son and the 1st daughter In law. I have 3
brother in laws. I adored their 1st wives 2nd and 3rd not so much. They have their own click and go out of their way not to include me in activities. My kids are all grown and their kids are small so we don’t do much with them. It does suck though because I did try.
Your husband knows exactly why she doesn’t like you. If you really want to know ask him or ask his mother but either way you won’t like the answer
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All you can do is keep trying,
Get your husband to try to change her mind or find out why or what you have done
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Leave them in the past and move on
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I’d leave her alone. She obviously doesn’t want to like you. It sucks yeah but you can’t make a person like you.
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Please do everything to have a relationship. I bumped heads with my only sister in law i truly wanted to be close with her, we were even pregnant twice together. When she was mudered it crushed me how we were never close 
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Have you ever heard the saying “let sleeping dogs lie” move on don’t waist your time and effort.
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Sit her down or invite her for coffee and have an honest heart to heart. Ask her directly why it seems she doesn’t like you. Let her know your wishes for the kids, and that you’d like to at least be able to try to get along. All you can really do. If she still has a crappy attitude, or doesn’t want to put forth the effort than at least you can say you tried. Some people are just hateful and not much you can do about that. Have you talked with your husband? Maybe he could offer some input on the situation
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I just get on with your own life maybe she will come round maybe she won’t it’s no loss for you or your kids, they won’t miss what they never had an believe me when I say that…
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Just give up. I tried for 3 or 4 years to have social interactions with my husband family when he wad away working. After crying, yelling stressing out etc. I have now came to terms with I have 000 help when he is gone. I’ll he lucky to see his family once every 6 to 8 weeks. Now mine you u live about a km away from. Each parent. I do not beg anymore. When my youngest gets old enough he well know, and probably give up to
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There’s no way in hell that its for no reason. Try being honest with yourself first. I’m sure you’ve an idea.
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Don’t stress. Ignore her 
been there. Your life will be better not being involved with her if she’s acting like this …
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Unfortunately you can’t make ppl come round, it’s ashame for kids. Leave her be. I wouldn’t beg.
I wouldn’t beg that’s for sure. Just be yourself, if she likes you or not. Maybe she’s jealous of you. Sometimes that happens with women. I wouldn’t kiss anyone’s butt to try to make them like me.
Her loss, and u dont need people like that in your life anyway
You can’t make people like you. And nobody is required to make an effort to have you in their life, even for the kids sake. If she doesn’t wanna come around, leave it be. You can always still send the invite for get togethers and stuff, but don’t get your hopes up. Some people are just like that
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Well if she doesn’t want to come around don’t keep begging just move on
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Why bother? Let God handle it just the way He is you do not need her and your children do no need to be around any of them. If your husband hasn’t told you the reasons, your issue is with him… not them. You are blessed to be separated from them. My grandmother always told me… “Be careful what you wish for; it could end up being Much worse!” 
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We keep our family circle small. Me & hubby both lost our moms. And I’m good with that
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You can have a conversation. Maybe something happened that you don’t even realize. If she says nothing, then you just have to let it go. Not everyone is gonna like you and that’s ok. I’m sure you don’t like everyone. Stay blessed
I hate to say it but you are fucked it’s not gonna happen
Leave it alone or find out why she hates you and try to work with her thru the issue.
she’s probably jealous but honestly you don’t want that around anyway don’t beg
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My sister in law didn’t like me from day one. I truly believe she was jealous of me and wanted her brother around her all the time. Finally my husband told her I’m his wife and he’s never leaving me.
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You don’t, and don’t forced play time or coming together.
Normalize not begging people to b in your or your kids life.
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Stop begging first off. Just bc they share a family link doesn’t make it necessary to spend time with them. Just accept she doesn’t like you and move on. Find other people you actually enjoy spending time with and don’t waste your time.
I’d be respectful and familial at the appropriate times. Maybe she changes her mind at some point?!?
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Tbh honey, let it go. I am in a somewhat same situation & I’ve learned to, unfortunately, let it go. We can’t keep ppl around or make anyone like/love us. It sucks cause I know you use want the cousins to be close & everyone know one other & be a family, but if you have to force it. Don’t. Think about it… if she really wanted to come around, just for the sake of the KIDS INVOLVED? She would. But she hasn’t & most likely won’t. I’m sure they have others who love them & care for them, I would just let her & the thought of it ever working out go 100%. Best of luck! I hope I didn’t come off as insensitive… promise I wasn’t trying to be! I just have gone through this & some days think about it & wish my whole family & his would all come together. Hugs lovey 
You can’t force someone to like you. Maybe ask your husband if anything has been said. Maybe it’s just old school jealousy. Either way, like I said you can’t force them. I would try one more time and then leave it alone.
Spend your time with people who like you
I had a SIL who didn’t like me at all. Luckily, her children and mine still played together and got along. We just avoided each other as much as we could. Sometimes people just rub each other the wrong way. If you can, make it a point to be at family gatherings so the kids can get together. Otherwise, there’s not much you can do.
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U say just that…its ok for adults not to vibe, and it doesnt have to involve the kiddos. She will either b receptive or not, u cant control that but u can allow the convo to happen and what comes oof it comes of it. At least u know u tried 
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What a load of crap. I can’t think of one female saying they literally care that the in-law don’t visit and they want the kids to play that’s bs at its best. Most would say they don’t give two flying fcks I know I wouldn’t
Your husband needs to step in here. And it sounds like jealousy
You cant really repair this and you shouldnt want either your kids or hers to be used as trojan horses to smuggle any additional hatred into your life
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She’s not going to trust someone she dislikes, with her children… And, if she dislikes you that much, you sure as hell shouldn’t trust her with yours.
Take her to lunch or dinner and communicate- 
old school best school
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Not worth it in my opinion. I recently had my sister in law block me AND my husband because I asked her not to share pictures of our children on her social media.
See what she wants for her kids then and get it then mention it later on and see if she comes around if not then you went the wrong direction with that and just go ahead and tell her that you want to have play date meeting with her.
Sometimes what we want,isn’t what we need.