Anybody have any advice to help me help my 9 year old son tie his shoes? He’s been out of school for summer break since May and to keep him from back tracking we have him do “homework” 5-6 times a week and part of that “homework” is tying his shoes. It’s July now and even with tying his shoes 5-6 times every single week since mid May he still claims he can’t do it. We have him tie his shoes off his feet 3 times each day we do “homework” and he does fine but then the second we tell him to start tying them on his feet is when he says he can’t do it and just absolutely refuses to even try. We’ve tried different tying methods, having him watch videos of tutorials, tied with him, have him tie other strings to get used to tying shoes, gotten him longer laces and it’s just like when he has those shoes on his feet he won’t do it even though we’ve seen him tie just fine when the shoes are off. He’s going to be in 4th grade this next school year and I’m also going to have a toddler and a newborn so I’d really like him to be able to just put his shoes on in the morning and tie them but at this rate it’s not looking like that’s going to happen.
When my middle son entered kindergarten day 1 , teacher untied all of their shoes and announced that she would not be able to tie all those shoes all year so they learned very fast 
! I was thinking at the time she was mean . Now I think she was one of the best teachers ever !
Maybe get him some velcro shoes for school this yr. My 10yo autistic son is learning to tie his shoes. This was the first year I bought him tie up shoes w/ the understanding he works hard to learn to tie them. He does great now (even double knots them so they don’t come untied), except they’re still loose. We’re working on tying tighter over the summer.
At this point, at this age, with all this practice, it’s likely a learning disability and/or issue with fine motor skills. It will come in time.
Consider shoes that don’t have to be tied if it’s that big of an issue.
My 11, 10 and 8 year old just learned less than 2 years ago how to tie there shoes. I got a book off of Amazon that made a shoe and showed you how to tie etc. That seemed to work for them
It sounds like, at this age, it might be a learning disability. Have you talked your pediatrician?
You don’t say anything about any sort of developmental delay and those suggesting disability, don’t let them freak you out as that’s pretty extreme for the sake of laces if there are no other traits. Some take longer to master the finer fiddly things and maybe don’t focus on it so much. Get him footwear he can take off and on without undoing them for now and try again when older. Keep him doing fine motor activities in other ways and throw in the laces. When he practices when the shows off, does he have the shoe facing him or facing away? It maybe that he feels the shoe being in a different position is complicating it? Have him tie them facing away so as they’d be if wearing them
There are still board books for learning that have laces for practice and those lil bears with buttons and zippers and ties etc… maybe get one and make a game of it. Like time him and make it fun & exciting. I’m a nanny and the younger one had a brain injury a few yrs ago. He is still struggling with some milestones like shoe tying and hand eye coordination and bike riding. We are trying to keep it fun and engaging as we catch him up and try to get him back on track. He is 9 too. But I encourage him and give him one sour patch kid sometimes when he does a great job with shoe tying or putting on his shirt frontwards lol he is also a lil lazy as all kids are and if someone will do it for him, he will sit there like a lil prince waiting to be served lol so when he shows independent skills I make a big deal out of it. I noticed too that when I’m busy and don’t get to him right away as we are getting out the door he often will try to do it himself and sometimes will get it right. Your kiddo will get there, lots of patience and encouragement may be needed tho. Keep practicing and make it fun. There are great YouTube videos too and we all know how much they love those 
If I could still get someone to tie my shoes I would the ground is so far away these days .
Is this a joke?
Your child is having cognitive impairment. This is something Drs need to know because something is possibly wrong
The amount of parents who want to ‘trick’ or flat out punish away physical issues completely blow my mind. DO BETTER
Get him Velcro shoes and be patient. Get him a shoe lace tying board where he can learn to tie laces but stop pushing so much, practice once a day and relax. Is it really that much of a big deal?
Have him wear his shoes. Have him put the aglets in the top hole- now you have the “bunny ears”. Loop the ears twice and boom shoes are tied. This is how I taught my daughter, I always made her wear her shoes when learning this.
Maybe the shoes are too tight if they are tied
Which way is he holding the shoe when off? Facing him or the direction they’d be worn. If he’s tieing them in the direction of on his feet, then no excuses. Start not going places he wants unless he ties his shoes. If he’s doing it facing him, as if tieing someone else’s, trying to flip it may be throwing a mental block. Stop practicing for a week, then start over reteaching with you sitting right next to him, so your both in the same direction. My kiddo is 17, ADHD, and could not tie his shoes forever. Finally learned his OWN way, which just looks awkward while he’s doing it, but it’s done and they never come untied. Lol.
Get velcro shoes or slip-ons
Try occupational therapy. Sounds a bit delayed and he may have underlying impairments that need addressed. Tying shoes is part of developmental milestones, this is what pediatric OTs are trained to address. My own son was delayed tying his shoes and finally learned to do it by an occupational therapist. They are miracle workers.
Well you’re having him do it off his feet. It’s a lil backwards when they’re on his feet. He could be confused. One of my kids learned by using spongebob episode. My last kid just learned how in the 3rd grade, so you’re not alone. He wouldn’t listen to me, but his stepdad showed him once, and he did it his way. Maybe try spongebob or ask someone else to teach him
So he can tie his shoes if they’re off his feet, just refuses to do it if they’re on his feet? My question would be what is your response? Do you say “fine, I’ll just do it” and then tie them? If he has demonstrated he can actually tie them and doesn’t have a legit physical impairment that makes it impossible, I’d just tell him “well it looks like you’ll have untied shoes today” and then move on with your life. At school I tell kids to tuck their laces into their shoes if they can’t tie them because i would spend like an hour a day just tying shoes otherwise.
Get Velcro closing shoes.
We tried teaching my son & he couldn’t do it. His teacher showed him one Time & all of a sudden he knew how to 
What method are you using? Bunny ears was the easiest way to teach mines?
When practicing tying make sure they are facing away from him like if he was wearing them. So he has to look down to tie them. If the shoes are facing him where he can look straight at laces once they are on his feet it would look different and that may be hosnstruggle
Buy slip-on. Don’t push the issue. I couldn’t teach my oldest son to tie is shoes. I think it’s was because I was left handed
My austistic/adhd child has more issues with shoe tying than anything. We straight lace her shoes so she can slip them on and not embarrassed by velcro
Young one, get shoes with Velcro and move on. He will learn in time - probably when another child teaches him. To waste time on such problems takes a way from positive time together. Trust n believe- 
It sounds like a small motor issue to me. My son could tie build a bear shoes at 5. But still can’t tie shoes on his feet. It frustrated me too. He’s in OT now to work on that & other things. It’s easy to get mad & punish your kid when you don’t understand what the issue is. Don’t go there. Email the principal to his school an IEP eval request as soon as school starts. They have 60 days to complete it.
I tied my son shoes till he was like seven and one day we were in a hurry to get to school and I looked over and he was tying his shoes and I was like dude you’ve been lying to me this whole time and you know how to tie your shoes LMAO was very very funny