How can I get my stepson to accept me as his mom? He does not respect me or anything I say and I just wanna be respected and loved by him
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Maybe “mom” isnt the correct first step. Maybe friend first? If you treat him in the way you want to be treated im so sure his behavior will follow suite
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You’re not his mom so I’d start there. Is his mother in his life? How long have you been around? You have to slowly build and nurture a relationship with him. His respect for you and possible love for you will come in time. You can not force his feelings for you. They may never happen. Just support, care and treat him like your own. If anything comes from it respect definitely will. Take a breather, step back and let it happen naturally.
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Girl leave him alone he has a mom have your own kids for that. Stop expecting him to like you he doesn’t and probably never will
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does he have a mom? you need to remember that even you love him, he may not … he isn’t thinking of you as mom.
to start he his buddy, his friend, start slowly. be playful. ad his age to your post. makes huge difference.
your job as a step mommy , extra mommy is to love,like him. give him comfort and be his friend. start there. earn his trust and respect. slowely but surely. can’t say more as i don’t know his age. thats how my husband started, by being her friend, buddy, now they have strong bond
Talk to him. Don’t push him just let him know that you don’t want to replace his Mum.
Don’t push him into anything just sit down and have a conversation.
More info please…is his mother in the picture? Does she support you? Does the father support you? Etc etc
Are you married to his father, how long…give it time it will happen or it wont.
As a step mom myself. You are not his mom so stop expecting that. Just show him love, respect and consistency. He is a child thrown into an adult situation. I raise my 4 bonus kids 24/7 as their bio is not involved and never did i try to replace her…i left it up to them as to what they wanted to call me or consider me as. I was simply a mother figure in their lives. 5yrs later and i am the only mom 3 of 4 remember.
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There’s so many questions left unanswered here. First- you’re not his mom. He doesn’t have to accept you as his mom. Give him time and space if that’s what he needs. Second- how old is he? How long have you been in his life? Being part of a blended family isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s hard on the kids and step parents. Both my parents remarried when I was 6 and 9. I went through phases my whole childhood of loving and hating them both at different times. As an adult, I’ve looked back many times and thought to myself how I wish I showed them love more but as a child, it was not easy being a step child. My advice, give him your positive time and attention. Show him love and patience. I hope with time, you all will build a strong bond and you both will build trust and love. Good luck!
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First off you’re not his mom and you will never be his mom. He already has a mom, you’re a bonus mom and sometimes things just take time. You can’t snap your finger and expect him to love you as if you are his mom. Just give him time.
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First of all you’re not his mom and never will be so being his friend would be a better goal. You can’t make him love you but you can and should demand respect for you and others. Sit him down and have a honest heart to heart with him telling him you want to be his friend and that you’re not trying to take his mom’s place and you may be more successful than trying to force the mom thing on him. 
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Going through this myself I give space and don’t push my love on him however I do push respect you dont have to like me but you do have to respect me. Having a blended family is hard and my soon to be step son went from only child to one of five it’s a big change and I know sometimes he feels like I took his dad away
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Things take time. How long have you been in his life? You are not his mom. You never will be biologically. I understand wanting that love and respect from him but think about it from his point of view. Just be there for him and love him. Eventually things will get better. I’ve been a stepmom for 16 years. Things were rough, especially for my son because he was 7 when I came in the picture. Now he’s 22 and calls me mom and we have a great relationship.
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Maybe you will never be excepted. At times their minds have been Poison by their own mother’s. The grow up with hate. Supposedly you the other woman that broke a marriage. Even if it’s not true.
I totally get that I’ve been here. I learned that he secretly did love me, it was just hard for him to show.
Anytime he seriously accidentally hurt himself, he would cry n call for his Mom. I was the one that was always there n come running. It was me, I was the one he called for in true times of his need. When it came down to it I was his Mom in his heart 
Your not his mom. Is mom still in his life? If so, don’t attempt to play the “mom” role. Its not your position to do so. While he absolutely needs to respect you- and your partner should be ensuring this. Reevaluate how you interact with him. He isn’t your responsibility- we use the NACHO system- look it up. Its not for everyone, but works for us. Building a relationship with a child takes time
You are not his mom. Try to gain his respect as his Stepmom. His dad can help with that.
I met mind when he was about 4 and he didn’t respect me at all or women much in general. He has respect and love for me now bc im there for him like a mom and do everything a mom should. From discipline to rewards to cooking him dinner to doing fun stuff when dad isn’t home. How old is he?
Your not his mother period!
If you’re trying to force that outlook on him then it’s going to blow up in your face.
Start slow, this child is trying to deal with his Parents separation, and now your introduced into the equation. Try spending time with him and doing what he likes and go from there… include him in things your doing. Etc
For one thing You are not his (Mother).Just be There for him Show him Love and maybe Time will come when he accepts you as his father’ wife not his Mother
Dont push be consistent, do what you say say what you do. Do ever talk down or rude abt his mother and dont listen or agree if his dad does. Dont get in the middle of things just stay the corse and give lots of Grace .
You can’t expect him to love u as his mom. These things take time in which he can grow to love you as his bonus/step mom. He does need to respect you though.
Newsflash you are not his mom.
Start with, don’t try to be his mom.
It can take time, but you can do it
It’s earned. Treat him
Right and don’t try to be his mom. Let him figure that out
Well, you’re not his mom, so……