How can I get my toddler comfortable in his own bed?

My three year old and I have moved into a home with my boyfriend and his son. My son used to sleep with me until we moved. I knew that getting him to sleep in his own bed was going to be hard, but he is waking up every hour and not letting us sleep. Does anyone have any suggestions about how to get him comfortable in his bed


A cool night light. Glow in the dark stars. It sort of helped me lol

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A story book or two before bed and lots of cuddles

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He interrupts your sleep? He is 3 you interrupted his whole life.


So literally just went through this. I would put him in bed and he would just cry. I would let him cry for a couple of minutes then I would go lay down with him and keep getting up to leave the room eventually he wouldn’t cry again. And almost every hour he would wake up and come to bed with me. You have to just continue putting him in his own bed. It’ll take about a month to break the habit! Good luck!

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Melatonin…I’m kidding, kinda :joy:
How old is boyfriends son? Maybe make it a “sleepover” kind of thing with them so he feels comfortable. Good luck

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Having the same issue with my 2yr old. I put my selfie light next to his bed at a low setting, also I tuck him into bed and lay with him until he falls asleep… also try snacking and feeding so his nice and full before bedtime. He still wakes up around 4/5am for cuddles but small steps

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He’s having anxiety. Don’t stay with him until he falls asleep then leave. That causes more anxiety when they wake up and suddenly you’re not there. Does he have all his favorites around?

Get a bedtime routine! I have my three year old go potty, the. We brush teeth and mouthwash, then she gets in bed and we turn on the sound machine (white noise), then we do bedtime stories. She has a nightlight. We also have the camera monitors we can talk through (we see her she cannot see us) so if she’s getting up/ restless / trying to do anything but sleep we talk through those. He will get there mama! New places are hard!!

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Did you guys just move in recently? If your doing the whole night time routine maybe he just needs more time to adjust. My now 13 yr old slept on the couch the first yr we bought our first home when she was little. She was super excited to get her own room .picked her own paint ,set it up with all her favorite things the whole nine. She loved it all day n even got tucked in but middle of the night I’d hear her little footsteps come down those stairs n plop on the couch lol.she was a little older too maybe about 6 or 7 lol. I bought her a bear with a flashlight on its tummy n she used it to come down at night. I just let her do her thing and one day she just stopped. May be a little different for you tho because he is still a baby and just wants to sleep with momma so lots of hug cuddles and reassurance n patience will get you both thru this be because it may take some time lol. For a nightlight try a lava lamp. Something he a stare at til his eyes get tired on him and yes melatonin is ok sometimes

Make sure he is nice and full before going to bed. Be very firm and put him back to bed whenever he gets out of bed.

I didn’t have this problem but just a thought…maybe a body pillow to tuck next to him? That way he feels as though someone is next to him.
That’s a big change for a little guy, don’t get upset with him. He is not used to being alone.


If he is sleeping in a toddler bed maybe consider an upgrade to a “big boy” bed… my daughter hated her toddler bed and slept with us every night until we moved into our new home and we upgraded her bed and now she sleeps in her own bed a lot better… may not work for everyone, but might be something to think about…

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Thats gonna be difficult, not only is his security and comfort gone sleeping with mommy but being in a new environment as well is problem causing some anxiety. Try falling asleep next to him and putting him to bed with a stuffed animals in front of or behind him to give him the feeling of you being there.

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Let him pick out his own bedding, pillows, blankets. Maybe his favorite hero… make him excited to have his own stuff he picked to sleep with. Just gotta try different things, eventually something will work. Good luck mama.

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Keep putting him back in his bed don’t cave and let him get in the bed it will take a sometime but eventually he will try and make the room more comfortable night light maybe a new stuffed animal to snuggle I had a little issue with my youngest daughter but she eventually got used to the new routine

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Consistency :slight_smile: when he wakes up keep putting him back in his own bed. its tiring at first but he will eventually get used to being in his bed and sleep through the night. at least that was my experience with my son

Lie down with him in his own bed until he falls asleep. He needs that comfort, don’t send him to go fall asleep alone etc…you’ve been together all his life, so make the change a gradual one, during the day speak to him about how big and brave he is to sleep in his own bed and proud you are of him. Speak positivity into him to a point where he will no longer need to come to your bed. All the best


I had to spend a few nights with my son in his bed. I’d settle him in there, go to my own bed once he was asleep and if he woke in the night I would just climb in his bed with him. It does take a bit of time, but now my son sleeps most nights in his bed alone… he just still needs cuddles to sleep - which is more than fine!

I’m not proud of this but I used a bit of bribing… my son always sleeps in his room but was starting to wake up in the middle of the night every night which left me exhausted. I told him that if he slept all night in his room, I would take him to get donuts as a reward. a week went by with him eating a donut every day and I got sleep! whoohoo! now, he asks for a reward and I explain to him that he cannot have donuts everyday but that I was very proud of him and that we can get donuts on friday before school/daycare.


He’s feeding replaced, you two shared a bed and home now you have moved and want to sleep with another and expect him to sleep alone.
Try laying in his bed with him, he’s use to your warmth and smell. Give it time and patience, new home, new life and new circumstances he’s still so young


To get my son in his new bed, he had his lovey blanket, I would lay there for a while with him, and see if he wants something to make it his own. Maybe a protective dinosaur? Stress the fact that its HIS and he is getting to be sooo big

I went from having to lie next to my son until he fell asleep to holding his hand and now I sit on the floor no holding hands for a certain amount of time and gking to my own bed. I’ve been dealing with my little man not sleeping through the night for over a year and honestly it’s super rough. I’ve spoken to his Dr. and have a lot of great information if you’d like to know more, you can message me if you need to. :blush:

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I may get shamed for this. My 7 year old hates sleeping in his room and would rather sleep on the couch in the living room (which is closer to the master bedroom). Sometimes, I let our 7 year old sleep in the middle if he wants to snuggle. Sometimes, he wakes up during the night and asks to sleep with us, I tell him he can sleep on the floor next to our bed and he falls to sleep within seconds. I have no problem letting him sleep in our room.


i got a pillow made out of my husband shirt and ever since our son will sleep in his own bed maybe make a small pillow out of something that belongs to you our son use to do the same thing as your child every hour he was in our room he kept saying he wanted to be with Daddy he was 5 now he is 6 and sleeps in his own bed all night

Have a routine, stick to it. Everytime he gets up just put him back in his bed.
Also use a nightlight and noise machine.

Mine did the same thing. Have made a bedtime “routine” as much as I can & also got a weighted blanket & special night light. I sat in the room til she fell asleep (not in the bed w/ her is key) & then left. Keep walking him back every time to his room & repeat (it’s STRESSFUL I feel ya)


I personally think you are expecting too much of him. He slept with you for 3 years and now you have moved him into a new home with 2 other people and expect him to sleep on his own while you sleep with another, seems a bit harsh. In hindsight you should have moved him into his own bed while it was just the 2 of you to get him used to that. Take it one step at a time. Make him a cosy bed on your floor and allow him to sleep there. Then gradually move him to his own room. Or lay with him till he falls asleep in his bed and gradually build it up from that. He is 3. He is young and will feel very alone and pushed out. He needs to feel safe to sleep on his own. Hopefully with lots of patience. Love and support from you and your boyfriend he will relax and be comfortable really soon. Good luck


My son is almost 2.5 and we just transitioned him to his own bed around his 2nd birthday. It was rough for the first week or so but I only had to redirect him to his own bed a handful of times throughout the night. I also offered to hold his hand every night until he fell asleep. He has slept in his bed every single night since then.

And I know this isn’t possible for everyone but, when we tried to get my son in his own room we bought a Batman race car bed. He loves Batman so now it’s fun for him to get into his car bed :blush:

My two child which is 2 and almost 1 years old both sleep in their beds the best thing to do is start them when their born because once they get used to sleeping with you its hard to get them transitioned. I mean there was times where the only way i got sleep was let them sleep with me but I was to worried about sids or them not wanting to sleep in their beds. Maybe let them fall asleep with you and once they go to sleep put him in his bed would probably work my youngest still sleep in her bed but in my room but once she finally starts sleeping all through the night im putting her in her own room

Supernanny used to tell parents to just keep putting the child back in bed. Eventually they will stay. U lose some sleep but it needs to be done.


Routine routine routine! Cool night lights! New sheets!

Just remember, the first three days/nights of any new routine are usually tough. It’ll be a breeze after that. Just stay strong mama!

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Back to bed every time for a few nights until they understand that is the only option. Weighted blanket may also be helpful.

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Buy him a new bedset that he picked out. Have him go to bed the same time every night. Be persistent in having him stay in his own bed…and keep telling him he is a big boy now and needs to sleep in his big boy bed.

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Aww bless new house too! Can they share a bedroom both kids? Weve got lights that go all around the room, new teddy? I guess your going to be tired for a few nights putting him back

My daughter is almost 3 and has been in my bed since she was born i put her toddler bed in my room and she started sleeping in it all night about a week after we started putting her in it she also has a heavy blanket and her dolls in her bed and wont sleep without them

I would lay in my kids beds with them until they fell asleep , torture but eventually they started going to sleep together instead of with me. They’re 8&3

I use to put classical music on lightly and let it go all night. It really calmed my son and made him not so scared.

Weighted blanket might help. They sell toddler ones. Also maybe a new fancy night light or something that shows fun things on the ceiling.

Mine used to wander through most nights so I used to pay a pound a night to stay in his own bed. It soon adds up and he bought a game he wanted :woman_shrugging:

Get him a lg pillow …put your used pillowcase on it…he can then snuggle with it and still smell you…it may still take a while but he can sooth himself with the pillow before he gets out of bed…

Just keep with it. Consistency is key even though it’s hard on everyone at first.

My 7 year old I lay with her rub her back and snuggle until she goes to sleep if she wakes I again will just lay with her and snuggle until she falls back asleep

Trade pillows ! Get one that smells like Mama and let him have that one!


routine. and do not give in. they’ll.get acclimated

We have found sticker reward charts to be extremely helpful

his old habbit is very hard to break.

Bed tent. A blanket (that smells like you) from your bed. Start small. If he lays in his bed until a little alarm goes off. Then he can come by you. This works great later for getting up when you want him to.
Put his bed in your room for a while.

My son slept in my room til he was seven or so even now he will still sleep in my room when he needs too. We let him even got him a lil bed for our room. My other 3 kids never did. Some kids just can’t sleep on their own.


Check out Nanny 911

Kirsty Ganya What if they are sick or scared?

Patience routine consistency


I think it is hard because there are 2 big changes for him happening at once. The new house and sleeping alone. Maybe is better to wait until he feel safe and comfortable in the new house and after this mission is accomplished, starting to teach him to sleep alone…


Was having the same issues with my 4year old and 1 year old twins. I have the three of them sleeping together now and I would lay with them until they fall asleep and then lay my pillow next to the more clingy ones. Now, they only get up once through the night and come to my room and I just take them right back to bed and lay with them til they fall asleep again. Works pretty good for me.

Weighted toy or blanket…my son coslept with me until nearly two… I updated his not to a Thomas the tank bed and bedding, he would go in and off to sleep with a book or lullaby but still constantly wake throughout the night, I bought him a weighted blanket and he sleeps through most nights now, some nights he will wake in the middle of the night but fewer and far between…agree with Alexandra two big changes at once would be hard, hard the same issue with my daughter when we moved in with my current partner

Get a nightlite. Leave his door somewhat ajar so he doesn’t feel trapped. If possible start by having him take naps there. Let him pick out a nighttime buddy to sleep with

Lots of stuffed animals surrounding him. He won’t feel alone.

JoyAnn Freeman any suggestions? I know little one isn’t 100% there yet, but getting better.