I know this isn’t entirely mom-related. I am 28, and my brother is 41. Has been in and out of rehab but falls off the wagon. He lives with our parents, and it’s a rough situation there too. I have no idea how to help, but I’m the only person he talks to. Has anyone dealt with similar situations and any success stories to overcome this…
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Tbh as much as u want to help if he isnt ready there isnt a lot u can do. I know it sucks. Been there, done that with my son. And sometimes if u push it too hard u will push them away and they wont come to u at all. I wish u all the best and hope this works out well for u
I don’t know if he attends AA meetings, but AA and a good sponsor helped me stay sober for 61/2 years. Believe me, I was a heavy drinker. It’s helpful to be in contact with others in the same situation. Go with him if that would help. AA is a loving, welcoming group of all kinds of people (I’m a nurse).
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All you can really do is offer support, love and encouragement. Healing starts from within and him.
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Cant help someone who doesnt want help. You can offer, but until they’re tired if living the way they have been they will not change.
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Sadly, you can’t help him… Only he can do that… You can love him and let him know that you will be there to help support his sobriety, but that’s all you can do. HE and he alone, is the only person that can save him… Addiction sucks, and it’s hell for those of us that love the addict… Set boundaries, so that he knows what you will deal with and what you won’t, and stick to them… #prayingforyou #addictionsucks #youarenotalone #addictionhurtsfamilymembers
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I feel you on that. I lived through it already and my best advice to you is ask God how to deal with it. You will be surprised as to what will start happening. If you tried everything else and nothing works, try Jesus 
Keep praying. Turn it over to God. It’s bigger than you. Pray with him if he will let you.
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He has to want it.
You can’t help him, until he gets sick n tired of being… sick n tired.
Plus as long as people enable him… he will probably have no desire to stop. Why would he?
Put thankful prayers into motion:sparkling_heart:
I have 4.5 years in recovery. I will pray for him, your family. Wish you all the best… you can attend Alanon it’s amazing for family members of alcoholics.
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U can not help him he has to help him self. All u will do is make yourself crazy trying. There is nothing u can say or do. The drinking will win every time
I am a recovering alcoholic and went thru.detox and rehab my advice to u.is this your brother has to admit.he is an alcoholic and if hes going to get.help he has to stick to his guns make up his mind he does not need alchohol to survive. This is a physiological problem which requires help.only he can get it for.himself it’s good your there for him but theres only so.much.you.can do. He has to make up.his mind put the cork on the bottle and stick to it. Please call Alanon thier there to.help u good luck my dear
Keep providing him support don’t give up. it takes years for alcoholics to be successful in battling their addictions. AA and long term rehab
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As long as there are people in his life willing to shield him from the consequences of his choices, he has no reason to change. Being an alcoholic is working for him because he’s got food and a roof and doesn’t have to worry about anything but drinking. If he’s severe, he may need medically supervised detox because it can be very dangerous (the reason liquor stores were considered essential - this detox would’ve been just as deadly as the virus if all the alcoholics went cold turkey).
Until he finds and faces the root of what he’s running from, he will continue to do so. Therapy, intensive therapy not just that lighthearted superficial talk about my day kind, will be needed to dig that trauma up by its root so that he can start healing. He’ll need all the support he can get on this journey so don’t just drop him, but refuse to enable him or normalize his drinking any further. Refuse to engage with him when he’s drinking or drunk, only be willing to talk to him sober, don’t allow talk about alcohol or drunk stories, etc. You can be there for him without being there to support his addiction, and the isolation which comes from cutting off all contact, while effective for others since it causes them to hit rock bottom, can further traumatize an addict leading them further away from you and themselves.
First thing I recommend is a family support group for you and your parents. They are an absolute wealth of information, can connect you to local resources that can help you, and most importantly make you feel less alone and scared as you face this. Family counseling would be a good place too. Somewhere in his life, something hurt him, badly, and he’s running from it. Anything you can do to help him actually fix that instead of just putting the alcohol bandaid over an arterial bleed will be more effective than anything else.
Put simply? Addiction is the result of an untreated infection in the soul and heart. Intervention is most often akin to the lancing of the area to release all the poison. Therapy is taking antibiotics to get rid of the infection entirely. Support programs and meetings are handwashing to keep infection risk low. But that pus pack of infection (trauma) needs to be lanced and cleansed otherwise the infection will continue to flare up.
I’m 29, my bother is 49, he had been in and out of so many rehabs I lost count. He has lived with my parents off and on for the past 10 years because he can’t/won’t hold or get a job. He got locked up this year and our dad FINALLY let him sit there in jail. Since that day he’s been clean (as far as I know). He had been enabled so much and bailed out so many times, I started to think it was a lost cause. But I guess sitting in jail did something to him. We lost our dad shortly after he was released from jail, and to my knowledge he has still not touched alcohol, not even to deal with the pain. I really believe you have to let people fall on their ass before they wake up.
Does he actually want help? that is a big thing because you can’t help people who don’t want to get better unfortunately
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Ariel Duarte i was gonna say the same thing. Been there done that only i was the brother!
Find an alanon group, pick up the book codependent no more, and if he actually wants help then research some resources. Unfortunately no atrer what he says to you, no amount of emotional investment or advice from your end are going to save him from his alcoholism.
I have an uncle that is a heroin addict. We have tried so many times to help- he’s been to rehab 6 or 7 times. We’ve tried the get him a job, a place to live, thing and the tough love no help thing.
Nothing works for long because he doesn’t want help.
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He has to want help, but do as you keep doing and show your love. I know from experience how hard it is to see someone you love suffer from alcoholism, always let him know your rooting for his happiness and sobriety. Look up aa meetings in your area for him to attend, not sure where you are, but there’s an app called “meeting guide” where it goes off your location showing you all the times and places of meetings each day of the week. Most places are usually closed meetings(for anyone who wants to stop drinking) with one open meeting( for family to attend too) once a month. I can also suggest, searching for an al anon meeting for yourself , its to help the families of alcoholics.
You can’t. Im going through th same thing with my brother and have been for years and I have learned to step back and let him reach his rock bottom because I was helping to kill him. He has to want it. You can’t do it no matter how much you cry and beg and make promises if he doesn’t want it it will never happen. Sorry you are going through this. It is a heartbreaking thing to watch and to be a part of. I hope he gets the help he needs and you get your brother back. But stand your ground and don’t enable him. You will love him to death.
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Can’t help someone unless they want to be helped.
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Find an Al-Anon meeting near you. They help family members of alcoholics and you may be able to find other resources there. The truth is the alcoholic has to make the changes, but al-anon can definitely help you. Praying for your family. Best wishes.
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He’s going to need intensive in patient rehab that lasts longer then 30/60 days. My dad was an alcoholic most of his life n it took a glimpse of death to make him stop n he was in rehab with the va for 2 years but sadly the alcohol still won cause his body shut down after he stopped drinking n passed away 3 years after quitting. But your brother wants to stop also or it won’t be successful and he needs a good support system also
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My partner is an alcoholic and my hearts broke I feel for you 
I don’t no what to say because I’ve done everything I can to help more than enough it’s just a vicious circle 
From someone who has been sober for over 4 years now, I will tell you this. You CANT help him if he doesnt want the help. Only he can help himself. When he is ready then you can, but you need to give him tough love. Dont fall for his bullshit and make him take responsibility for everything he does. Tough love is hard to do but its the only way to truly help him when he is ready.
Pray for him, that the Holy Spirit will overpower the addiction and that he will want to sober up and go for treatment. Nothing is impossible for God. You as a sister can pray for your brother.
I’m a recovering addict and I can tell you from experience…when we relapse, we JUST need support. There is a fine line between support and enabling. But, I have a sister who wants to write me off because I relapsed. That accomplishes nothing but hard feelings, which can lead to another relapse. My parents, on the other hand, practice tough love. They didn’t coddle me, they made it very clear that they were disappointed in me, but they stuck by my side and their attitude is simply “what do we need to do to get you back on the right path”. Be supportive but don’t baby him. Keep your intentions clear and stick to your guns. You and your parents need to be on the same page if he lives with them. Remember, as hard as it is for the family to go through this, it’s very hard on the addict as well. Good luck. I hope my personal experience will help you in this situation. I’ll say a prayer for all of you. Also, side note…nothing willhelp if your brother doesn’t WANT to get help. It’s hard for family because your efforts will be for nothing if he doesn’t want to get better.
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Seek help from AA. I have been sober 39 years with their help
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You can’t really do anything for him, if he isn’t willing to help himself…sadly, that’s how addiction is.
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Attend AA meetings and partner with a sponsor.
Needs to work the 12 steps
My husband was an addict for 15 years, from middle teens until about 2 years ago. I fought with him the first 7 years to get clean and it didnt work. He had to hit his bottom and realize he had basically lost it all before he came to me and asked me to help him find some help. He’s been clean for 2 years now in October, but he didnt do it until he realized it needed to happen. No amount of pushing from other people will make it happen
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This is long term and most difficult as you know. Honestly, just keep doing what your doing, hope for the best and love him for as long as you have this precious time together
I’m currently going through this with 2 of my brothers. I’ve tried to help over and over but I’ve learned if they aren’t ready for that change it won’t help. I remind them I’m here when they are ready. It hard to see people you love struggle but sadly we cannot make the change for them
Your can only help him if he wants the help
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Speaking from personal experience with my aunt, he isn’t gonna get better unless he wants to get better . We put my aunt in rehab and my parents even took her son away from her and she still didn’t get better until she was ready . Well, not exactly . It wasn’t until it was life or death literally with her . But she chose to live and get son back over drinking .
He has to want to help himself. Hes 41 and lives with his parents. Probably enable him. Personally I would of kicked him out and make him realize he needs to get his life together. It’s hard to do but you have to stop making excuses for him
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Unfortunately unless he’s ready to get sober, there’s not much you can do. He has to want it for himself.
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Check him at ER and say he is sick and wants detox. They will keep him, screen and keep him on a detox section. From there they will direct the problem. After treatment there is a injection name vivitrol that the doctor usually prescribe and offer for no cost
What I CAN promise you is if he ISN’T READY TO CHANGE… YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING BABE… BEEN THERE DONE THAT… It’s the same with a drug addict… Nobody else can do ANYTHING if they’re NOT READY
If he’s living with his parents he’s never going to quit.
He needs to hit his rock bottom.
That’s not ever going to happen if he doesnt have to fend for himself.
You can help him by convincing your parents to stop enabling him.
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I was in and out of rehabs for years. Nothing helped but being tired of my own shit and wanting to stop on my own! I’m 2 years clean now, I just got tired of being sick and tired. Just show support that’s all you can do. Don’t force it!!!
To be honest all you can do is be there. Any one who is addicted to something cannot be pulled out of that situation because of someone else. They have to see what they’re doing is hurting themself and others. They have to want the help and to change. Otherwise they’ll continue to do the same things
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First off, you can’t help someone no matter how much you want to, if they don’t want to be helped. I know it’s hard to watch and stand by and not do anything. But if they do want the help there are resources out there.
Prayers for your brother but the sad truth is you can’t help someone unless they want the help and to change. Sometimes they have to hit rock bottom in order to want help and get better. At this point all you can do is be a listening ear for him.
First i want to say i Will keep y’all in my prayers. Second my brother is a recovered meth addict. 2 years sober thank god! For my brother it took me telling him just how it was going to be my daughter absolutely adores her uncle and when he was on the stuff i made him choose keep going down the path your going and not see your niece at all or get help!! I told him your her world and i want you to be around to see her graduate and to see her walk down the aisle. He also fount and outlet and had to get rid of the bad crowd he was running with but his outlet is music he started his own band amd songs about addiction and how over came it. His band is 3 sons. There on her if you would like to listen and also will listen and talk to your brother is he just needs an ear:heart:
hope this helps sorry its a little crazy
You can’t force him to do it. He has to figure out what his “bottom” is and then he’ll fix himself.
My husband finally got to his “I need to stop before I really fuck up” point a few months back, and he tried pills to help but those didn’t do anything, but now he gets a shot and the first month on the shot has been amazing. He goes to his 2nd one next week and he says he doesn’t even think about drinking anymore when he gets stressed out or pissed off.
He tried doing the meetings and all of that crap but they just made him want to drink more. So just because that works with some people doesn’t mean that’ll help him.
Your brother has to be willing to do it and WANT to change, otherwise it’ll never work
He has to admit that he has a problem and that he needs help. BUT he’s not going to get help unless he wants it
Aww iv read threw most of these comments, and its true he gotta want to or hit rock bottom like i did, im 47 now with 4 lush kids a very close loving family, and 30 years a Alcoholic, i hit my rock bottom 4 years ago, I spent 15 days in hospital on deaths door, i had drips in each arm i was yellow, and i had 16 litres of fluid drained from me, i still didn’t want to live, I was terrified of living life threw sober eyes, I just didn’t know how to do it, but i did and I’m 4 years sober now, and gunna be a nanny for the 1st time, The hardest part is admitting it, because you don’t wanna believe it, If I can do this after 30 years anyone can Xxx Gud luck x
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My brother is an alcoholic and my dad was. Honestly they are the only ones who can help themselves. I did everything in my power to get them to help themselves and they wouldn’t. My dad ultimately died because congestive heart failure but him drinking sped up his deathn
My brother went down the same road for a period of time . If he really wants to quit but cant fight the urge have him try kratom that’s how both of my brothers quit drinking .
To be honest only person that can help him is himself u can give him all the advice u want but only he can change if he wants
Only he can help himself
My mom overdose and died from drugs
My father is not far off
Real advice and real importamt. Offer to go to AA with him and if it’s drugs then in NA. Try to plan activities sober activities so don’t go to bars or places Where things can tempt him make aure hes around sober peoole let him know u love him and support hin if hes willing to do these things with you etc hes reedy to change at least hes wanting to alot of times They fall off because they either are around. The same type people they party with or They feel alone. I lost ly sister to addiction i wish i would have done more of the things
I told u. Once they die that is the end.At least you have to try and not give up on him I’m praying for u and ur family.
Prayers for you & your family. Yes my brother was a full blown alcoholic…caused issues with family, friends, his wife & finally work. Luckily when faced with losing his job & family he went to detox & has been sober almost 6 months. It’s hard because ultimately the person has to want sobriety & usually it takes loosing something or hitting absolute rock bottom. I pray your brother will get help💙
I dont suggest trying to force him to do something unless the whole family is in on an intervention. Just be there for him w.o enabling him. And be honest
I’m sorry to say but there is nothing you can do for him He has to want to stop Stopping to please someone else is fleeting at best I will pray for him to find it in himself
Unfortunately you can’t help someone if they don’t want to quit
I am a recovering alcoholic. Unfortunately unless he will admit he has a problem and really really wants help, there is not a lot you can do. I had a stroke which was the kick in the ass I needed. It wasn’t until then that I finally opened my eye’s to the sadness and hurt that I was causing. I can say now that I was a very selfish and self absorbed person and listened and promised but was never truly hearing what was being said. Promises were always broken and my children lost a lot if not all trust in me. I am now going into my 3rd year of sobriety and did this with my children’s support and love. The only regret I have is that it took me this long to get my shit together. I started drinking when I was 13 and I am now 59. You can’t keep picking him up and you definitely cannot make any excuses for his choices. Last step is “Tough Love”. Good luck 
I’m sorry to tell you this, but you can’t help someone who doesn’t want the help themselves. My dad was an alcoholic (he passed away years ago) he was in and out of rehab. It would work for a while, while he was willing to work at staying sober. But when he stopped working at it, he always went back to the drink. Step back, let him hit (his) rock bottom, then be there to love and support him at getting (and staying) clean. Good luck. Prayers for your family.
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I have been sober 26 years and it wasn’t until my family stopped enabling me I got sober. I’m not suggesting you or your parents give up on him. Lord knows I couldn’t have stayed sober without the support of my family. It’s great he talks to you but don’t make it easy for him to only worry about his drinking. Good luck.
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My husband was a BAD alcoholic but until he was ready to say “I need help” you cannot force them into any rehab. They will continue to relapse. Once he decided I’m done it worked. Been recovered for 18 years and it’s awesome. Your parents are enabling him if he continues to get alcohol. DO NOT try to detox him on your own, it can be fatal for sure. They need professional help with medical. Prayers to you, your family and brother!!!
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Drive him to his meeting. There is absolutely nothing anybody can do for an alcoholic. when they’re ready, they’ll know and do what they need. Toughen up and good luck. Try al-anon for families of alcoholics, they can help you.
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Ive been sober for 6 years and it didn’t happen til I remembered there is more to life than that struggle trying to get high or stay high and I wanted my sobriety more than life. Being an addict rearranges your brain no matter what chemical you put in it. He has to want it and there is no way you can want it bad enough for him. I will pray for you and hope he finds his way 
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You can’t do anything. He has to want to do it. You can beg and plead, threaten, give ultimatums but nothing changes until he changes it. Three C’s. You didn’t cause it, You can’t control it, and You can’t cure it.
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Try to be supportive but do not become an enabler. The hardest part of this disease ( don’t doubt for a minute it’s not a medical condition) is the the patient MUST want to get better! It’s a very hard disease to watch on its downward spiral😪
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It’s definatley a hard path!! Recovery Center of America is a great place the people are wonderful! There is a place in Danvers and Westminster that are beautiful whenever he is ready!! He has to be ready! They will come and get him!! But it’s up to him!!
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All of you have to quit enabling him. I went through it with my brother. I finally quit contact with him. He hit rock bottom and got outside help. He’s doing great now. Private message me and we can talk on the phone. Easier that way.
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Your parents are enabling him. He needs to want the help. Hitting rock bottom unfortunately is hard for you and your family to watch. But thats the best help you can give him. He either makes it or dont. Im living it with my 44 year old son. Very stressfull,sad, and scary. Many sleepless nights with worry. Praying for you and your parents. Of course your brother
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There is really nothing u can do he has to want to do it. Be honest and open with him about what his addiction is doing not only to himself but what it does to his family to see him struggling so badly. If u can get him to go to aa meetings offer to go there to support his recovery. Try to find an alonon meeting (idk if I spelled that right) it’s a group for family of alcoholics and can teach u ALOT about the disease and things u can do to help. Dont give up on him family is crucial in beating these demons. God bless
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Yeah my family is going through it with my brother and I keep telling my parents that they are just enabling him but I cant also make my parents do anything I keep telling them you can’t help anyone who does not want to be truly helped im all about letting him fall on his face and getting some sense into him.
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My brother died because o one would let me help
I was told to mind my own business. He had a aneurysm and became almost a vegetable until he died. It is true , they have to go themselves, but contact AA or Alanon , tell them the situation
They will try to help.
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With experience with my Dad, sadly you can not help unless they want the help. They have to want to quit. There are several medications that can help with alcoholism. The ONLY reason my Dad quit drinking & has been sober for 11 years, was my children. It took grandchildren for him to quit, well it took my son who was 6 to say PawPaw we learned about alcohol in school, please stop I don’t want you to die 
. He wouldn’t stop for my Mom or any of his children there are 4 of us, but he did for my kids…I am so sorry you are going through this, it is definitely a tough situation.
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You cannot help him yourself he s got to want to stay sober himself I have been there with my brother whom is no longer with us he passed away about 2 yrs ago.
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Try and steer him toward God. Pray for him and let him know he’s worthy . He may feel worthless and that’s what he will have to work through to get to better days . But God saved my brother from alcoholism .
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Unfortunately, you can’t really help him if he doesn’t want to help himself. Speaking from the view point of someone who has dealt with addiction, he will just keep relapsing until he is ready to be done. I’m sorry I can’t offer more positive news but that is just the reality.
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My youngest brother passed at 37 and my baby sister at 39, both as a result of their alcoholism. Unfortunately they must want to get sober, and is harder on you than on them. Neither would go to AA nor would they give up the booze. Prayers for your peace of mind.
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Get yourself into one of this Alanon programs the ones for family’s of addicts… that will be your best resource…
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I think tough love is going to have to be the answer here. My son battles addictions. He refuses to hold a job. And thinks he’s going to just laze about getting drunk and high off my dime. I finally had to kick him out and tell him sink or swim. He refuses to see he has a problem and refuses to admit he needs help, and refuses to get help. I love him dearly but if he doesn’t want to help himself I cannot do it for him. Sounds like your brother is the same way. Your parents are going to have to lower the boom, get help or get out. And stick to it. It’s the only way. You and your family can be supportive from a distance with out enabling him.
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It’s his battle to fight, but perhaps you and your family might find support at Al-Anon meetings. It’s a support group for those who have a loved one with a drinking problem.
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Sad to say but nothing you can do.If he does not realize he has a problem or wants help,then he will continue to do what he does.And MY OPINION ONLY,your parents need to cut him off.Tough love!
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I’m going to be 100% real on this
I quit reading after the first question. Why? You might ask. Because… you can’t help someone who isn’t ready to quit on their own. He has to want to quit drinking. He has to want better than whatever situation(s) he’s in.
Until then nothing you or anyone else can do or will do will be beneficial because if he temporarily changes his drinking ways it won’t be for him, it will be for those around him asking him to and just as soon as he can, he’ll go back to drinking.
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You really can’t help him. You could offer to give him a ride or something if he ever calls you to say he is ready to go but you can’t tell him he needs to go because he won’t listen to you. He already knows there is help out there so if he was ready he would have already taken it. And your parents need to kick him out. As long as he knows he has people to fall back on he won’t have a reason to change. I know it’s hard because I’m in the same boat but the more you push the harder it is on you.
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My husband is 60 years old and had been an alcoholic for 45 of those years. He’s been on and off the wagon time and time again
He handed his life over to God two months ago and is resolute in his sobriety in a way I’ve never seen before
He has his moments, and is occasionally hard to get along with…but its so much easier to reason with a sober man than a ranting drunk…
I’ve prayed for this man for 15 years for him to come to his sobriety…and i believe this will be the last time I ever have to wonder if this will be the day he starts drinking again.
I will pray for your brother and your family
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Let him hit rock bottom. Nothing you can do. I know hes your brother but he wont change unless he has too or wants too. Do not get sucked into his addiction. It is not your battle to fight. You will lose yourself In the end.
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The biggest thing my ex husband did was not continue to go back into the the same situation he was in before he went to rehab. Being at your parents house after he gets out of rehab could be a huge factor in him going back to drinking. You cant expect someone to change their behavior when the their surroundings are the same.
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You cannot help him if he doesn’t want it. Your parents need to not enable him either. It’s hard to watch.
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It’s definitely hard, my mum has been an Alcoholic for over 30 plus years:pensive:since I was a child… And still till this day she will not admit that she has a problem 
… I feel for you I really do but untill he wants help for himself he won’t stop… Time and time again I’ve tryed to get my mum help but it’s all useless when they don’t want it… So as hard as it is I’ve had to leave her to it and concentrate on my own life… Sorry not much help but its so easy to loose our own lives whilst trying to help others
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God’s the only answer. I know a lot of serious alcoholics. Those that have been in recovery for more than 20 years have all (without exception) turned their lives over to God. Every recovering alcoholic I’ve met that hasn’t turn to God, eventually turned back to alcohol (drugs, gambling, sex, etc.)
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Until he wants to help himself there isn’t much you can do. I’ve learned this the hard way. He has to be ready and until he is he will keep falling.
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Not sure where you are, but clean slate is a great company. They handle any addiction. Have different ways to manage everything. They have financial help if needed. They make a plan that will be most successful for the individual.
Good luck and many prayers!!
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It will only get better when he decides to help himself. Have known professional people who have lost everything! Family, Profession,and Friends.
Sad, very 
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I had a family member with drug addiction who finally beat it at 52 years of age. We never knew that he had a thyroid problem, which caused depression. Which, in turn, caused him to turn to drugs to fight the depression. It took a little while to manage that, but once he did, he was a new person… I know this isn’t the case for everyone, but it might be helpful to look into it for your family’s sake.
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It’s hard with alcoholics, my grandpa n aunt are alcoholics. Unless they want to change and want help, you cant do anything but be there, show him love, compassion n let him know you’ll always be there for him no matter what. For some, quitting could be deadly. Their body and liver needs it.
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I’m in recovery and it was hard, I had a job that paid me every time I got sick n went into the hospital for weeks due to kidney failure or pancreatitis… but when I looked around n saw what I was living in… I hated my life. I hated the way I felt. I would drink almost a gallon of vodka a day… pain pills too. My issue was I enjoyed getting lost in black outs… I still fantasize about them but I look what I have now n can’t imagine how I lived like that before. Ur brother hasn’t hit a bottom yet. He needs to get kicked out, live on the street… sorry to say but until then, he’ll continue to kill himself. He’s suicidal. That’s what we all were in addiction.
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You can’t help the unwilling. Dont enable. That’s the worst thing you can do! They have to want to help themselves. You CANNOT help them as much as you want to. Lots of tough love. It’s a hard situation to be in and watch your loved one spiral out of control.
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Sadly all you can do is be an ear. He has to help himself he has to want to do it for himself. It’s the hardest thing to watch.
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It sounds like your brother hadn’t lost hope to be sober because he has been in and out of rehab. Pray for him, offer to take him to rehab again… but don’t give up on him … everyone is right though… he has to want it
Love him from a distance and don’t enable his addiction. That’s the best thing you can do to help him. But he has to hit rock bottom and be ready to change for it to ever happen.
He has to want to help himself. If he’s not ready for that step then the best way you can help him is by not enabling him…not giving him money even if he says it for food, bills, etc. Just pay the bill or buy him food so he can’t get alcohol. Not driving him to bars or to the store for his alcohol. And you absolutely have to set boundaries and understand that no matter how sad the story, an alcoholic will lie any way they can in order to get what they want. You have to stand firm with him and unfortunately, probably watch him hit rock bottom before he decides he needs help.
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