My daughter turned 9 in September. She is showing signs of puberty. She has breast buds, and honestly, I don’t know when it started. They are little. However, it’s obvious if you are trying to notice. Also, she has a UTI and she was changing in front of me. I noticed she has hair down there. She has also been so moody. I feel like she is so young! Does anyone know what I can do to support her? Tips, advice… anything! This is so new for me, when it comes to supporting her. When it came to my own childhood, I didn’t have a lot of support and I had to figure it out on my own. I don’t want it to be like that for her.
I was 9 when I gotten my period my kid is 5 so she has time
I bought my daughter the American girl book "the care and keeping of you ". Very informative but on their level
Just have the talk with her. I started my period at 10, during school and knew exactly what was happening because my mom took the time to sit down explain and explain everything that was going to happen to my body. I wasn’t freaked out or anything. Communication is key
Five below has a book maybe you can read it with her it talk about going through puberty
Honestly 9 years old is the average for little girls to start a period now a days, mine started when she was 8. Just sit down and have a talk with her about what is going to happen and how to be prepared. Also the do’s and don’ts of when she starts. I made an emergency kit (a small clear make-up bag that had a pair of clean underwear, pads, flushable wipes and stuff like that in it) for my daughter to put in her back pack incase she started while at school. Don’t make it a huge deal, just explain to her that its a normal thing that all women go through.
I also started when I was 10. Just inform and support her !
My little one is 8 and started. Schedule an appt with her pediatrician and they may send her to a specialist. I also had her watch a video online about it. I noticed she was developing quickly and I’m glad I did it before it started.
Open communication. I find making sure my kids are knowledgeable about things that will happen to their body and they know I’m always there to listen. Also teaching them through the years how to take care of themself is really important. Moodiness? Hide in your room away from her hahah
Get a her a “go to box” ready. Pads, liners, soaps, maybe make up or smell good stuff. Just so even when she feels at her lowest with all the hormones she doesn’t have to feel overwhelmed. And make sure you explain to her why its happening and how to properly take care of herself so she doesn’t get sick.
I’m very open with my daughter. She’s also 9 and I know puberty is on the way. I’ve had the talk with. I explained everything that happens and why. I told her she can come to me or her daddy if she needs anything.
Get her a padded training bra so she can get use to the bra and her nipples don’t poke through her shirts. I had b cups at 10.
I always made it a point to be very open with my daughter. She watched me change pads and had showers and baths with me until a certain age but it gave me the opportunity to explain when she asked about my girly parts and it paid off.
As for mood wings just let her know that it okay to have bad moments and days but not to feed into them. Your a good mama for seeking any kind of advice … girls are not easy!!!
Training bra, maybe a care pack (pads, extra underwear) for if she gets her period at school. Don’t show your awkwardness or feelings of distress and just have a talk to her about what’s happening use a book as someone suggested leave it with her to read also.
It can still take a couple years for it to start.
Have a talk with her explain whats going to happen and that she needs to start carrying extra things with her for just in case she isnt home … our daughter started in 5th grade and the day she started she called me I went and got her from school and we kind of had a little bit of a girls day and told her it was nothing to be ashamed of and start buying her training bras
They have puberty books out for teenagers and adults tht need the talk w kids. I believe their called soup books for teenagers etc… They have a bunch w tht title. Tht will help u too. But american girl books helped my daughter too. They have all different levels. First stage then as they get older .
Get a pack of girls sports tanks from Walmart
My pediatrician gave me the book “Let’s talk about Sex” when my daughter started puberty a few years ago. It was very informative and helped guide the conversations moving forward.
I got pregnant at 15. I think talking to her about caring for her body how important it is not to let any boy do anything intimate even kissing. And probably teach her the best you can about being a woman and taking care of herself.
Please talk with her!
My mom never did. And when I noticed hair well… down there I freaked out. I actually plucked it!
I mean I never asked but she never told me anything about it.
Just be open with her about the changes happening and maybe take her out to get some training bras.
Thank you for your question honestly. I just made an appointment for my 7yr old. She turned 7 in July. I noticed the same thing with my daughter and was just curious because she is so young. I have 12 and 14 yr girls as well. I didn’t experience this with either of them and was just nervous and curious why so young. I had a talk with my 7 yr old and I bought her little training bras. Just have an open and honest conversation with her about how our body changes and what she should expect. Remind her everyone goes thru this and not to be embarrassed and reassure her she can come speak to you about anything.
There are books for girls but you’ll want to read each one carefully to make sure the message us not negative or sexist. And please keep the sanitary supplies stocked so she won’t run out or need to ask you to buy them.when her period starts.
Amazon has a good book for her to read that explains everything. Mine started at 9 a few months ago, and it’s a struggle. She wasn’t ready.
Im going to read through these Comments & Just let you know you’re not alone. My daughter is 8 1/2 & I have decided to have her wear a training bra because her buds are starting & Shes been super emotional … I feel she’s too young, But also notice the signs of her body changing
Have a talk explain to her why her body is changing, and let her know that you are there if she ever needs to talk to you, my daughter is 9 shorter for her age, but she has already developed boobs and they aren’t small either, she is now also on her third period. She has days when she doesn’t know why she has to go through what she does, but at the end of the day she knows I love her and I’m there for her regardless.
Stephanie Martorano There might be some useful info here for you…
Just start talking to her about how your body changed as you grew up, telling her what you went through will make her realize she is not a freak, and help her to understand the changes in her body are part of growing up. You also should talk about periods, and getting pregnant, you don’t have to give a how to lecture just what happens and about the shedding of the uterine lining each month. Girls are starting their periods as young as 6 these days, I have read that is because of the growth hormones in our meats. Just be patient with and remember what you went through.
This is a great book you can read together, or she can read on her own and ask you questions
are you kidding aren’t you a woman
See an endocrinologist about precocious puberty.
My daughter is too young for them yet but I bought some of the American Girl books for her for the future. My Girl Scouts all really liked ‘The Care and Keeping of You’ books, they are about their bodies and feelings as they grow. There are two books, one for younger girls and one for older girls, along with a bunch of books about different health and social topics. I wouldn’t just give her a book and leave it at that, but you might consider looking at a few puberty books, reading them yourself first and getting a framework of how to discuss these things with her, then give her the book to read herself. If she is easily embarrassed you may also consider leaving out certain parts of your discussions and then allow her to read about them herself first, and bring questions to you if she has them. Good luck!
I did a “Welcome to Womanhood” basket. I filled it with personal wipes, chocolate, soda, tissues, and anything else that may help her when the time comes. This opened up a time for conversation. I also bought varies pads and had her try them on before her period. Then she knew what she liked before it unexpectedly came.
Im soooo glad to hear other moms saying they feel theirs are to young. Mine is 9 and also going through these changes and im freaking out!! Any advice is appreciated.
Just be open and honest with her.
hormone disrupting chemicals are the main cause of too early puberty–they are in factory farm meat and milk, non organic produce, plastics, pesticides. Never too late to start eating healthier and getting rid of as much plastic and pesticides as you can. also what is with all the comments about getting her a bra (someone even suggested a padded one!), no bras are necessary unless she states that she is uncomfortable without one! Let that be her decision.
Was reading through this because I have to girls…it’s so crazy to me that girls are hitting puberty as young as 7…kind of terrifies me cause i have to 2 daughters… definitely taking in all the advice. Thank you for posting!
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An Endocrinologist
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Be honest. Don’t hide or hold back anything if she asks a direct question. On her age and understanding level, of course. I wish my parents wouldn’t have had me so sheltered in my younger years. I vowed not to do that with my own kids and answer their questions openly and honestly.
Just be honest with her and let her know ur there to talk about what ever she has questions with and explain everything that is going to happen with her body i have 3 girls and have been talking to them since they were young about changes that might happen so they would be comfortable with it when it did happen 2 down one more to go
Share open, judgement free communication with her. Answer any questions she has and don’t ever make her feel uncomfortable.
Do not get worried about some of the comments of precocious puberty. It is a real thing but not very common. Unless your doctor says anything, starting puberty at 9 is completely normal for girls.
Just give lots of support and the more prepared she is the less stressful it will be when she starts her period. Which her period may not start right away. It can take a while or even a couple years once puberty has started.
Exercising regularly might help those moods. Best of luck
My daughter has been on growth hormone injections for medical reasons since she was an infant and started puberty around age 6 due to her medication. I started shaving her armpits this summer age 7. She didn’t notice until my older daughter (they’re 13 months apart) started teasing her for having “butt hair” (pubic hair) and hairy armpits. My younger daughter started to ask mommy why do I have hair? I just told her everyone gets it, I have it and you sister will be hairy soon too. She laughs and that answer seems to be good enough for her just teach her how to care for her changing body with deodorant, a bra and shaving as you feel necessary.
I had Pubic hair around that age and started my cycle at 11. She isn’t too young. My mom made me watch sex education videos. It’s awkward for you to talk to her about it so sit her down and make her watch something about it without you in the room. And if she has any questions after that to ask you.
My daughter was 8 now 13 .American girl has books that’s age appropriate for her.my daughter liked them
My niece is 9 and started her period already… it starts young in some girls
Open lines of communication is key. Explain to her what is happening to her body. She will be embarrassed, but ploughing through is important. Remember, she has no clue why she feels the way she does. She will cry a lot and probably have a horrible attitude. Patience is very important. We also switched our diets, a lot of frozen and fresh vegetables and fruits and organic meats. No more canned veggies or any great value brand anything. It made a big difference with all the hormones they inject in animals and preservatives they add to foods, we didn’t want anymore added to her diet.
My sisters and I am started getting boobs when we were 9 and then got our periods at 11
Girl I have two going through it right now and holy hell is all I can say!
I have one that started at 10 it’s not to early!
My daughter is still young but I remember my mother’s friend pointed out my boobs bounced around 8 so she started making me wear sports bras I hated them I honestly don’t think I’ll make my daughter wear one until she asks but that’s an odd mom decision and to each their own but my daughter is 6 and likes to follow me to the bathroom and chat and ask questions so she knows that once a month women bleed to make room for new comfy space if a baby is to come and that these start way earlier than when we should start having babies as test runs ( I started at 9 at school was terrified something was seriously wrong with me)
When i started growing boobs i only grew 1 so i told my mom.family thought it was hilarious. After a few months of only having 1 my mom finally took me to the doctor. Doctor said i was fine my mom explaned nothing. Started growing hair everywhere so i try to talk to my mom about it. Again everything was histerical so i drop the subject. When i started my period i wouldn’t have gone to my mom even if i could have.(she had a stroke a few days before and was in the hospital) i freaked out to my 65ish year old grandma who helped me.I knew nothing. I wont be going through this any time soon i have all boys but if i was in you shoes id be more friend then mom about it. I was scared and i imagine she is / will be. Talk to her be straight forward and show her how to use things. Good luck.
There’s a book about the developing body just for girls I’m sorry I can’t remember the name right now , but cover and most pics are done in cartoon form. Just let her know what’s going to happen and what a wonderful time this is for her . Even though she may not feel that way right off plus I’d start letting her practice with panty liners just to get use to that feeling good luck they grow up fast mine were early bloomers as well as myself. Maybe make a day of it , just all about her take her to lunch etc
Buy her “the care and keeping of you” by American girl. That was a life savor for me when I was young and we bought my little sister it last year lol
I was 10 whe I started my period. My boy has just turned 9 and already has some pubic hair. It freaked me out to be honest ha ha but I didn’t show that to him and as I am so open with him he isn’t fazed at all. His attitude has been crazy up and down tho xx
Talk to her. No books, no videos, just open conversation.
My daughter showed signs at 9 but didn’t start till last day of year 6 just get some pads and knickers together and tell her the truth
So I was 10 when I got my period, none of my friends had had it yet. I was home alone when it happened but I knew excalty what it was because my mom had already educated me. If I had any question I asked her but for the most part I just kept to myself. I think the most you can do is educate her and be there for her if she has any questions.
I started mine at 8, didn’t get my full on set of periods until I was 11, different for each girl. Make an emergency box for her at home and for one at school. Make sure she’s carrying pads just incase. They usually never give warning at this age, just happens. Mine happed when at school with white pants
Start with an open conversation and go shopping together for training bras.
I would say make sure you are educated about it. I think this will help you to explain things on her level and in an age appropriate manner. If there is something you don’t know, it’s okay to say, “I don’t know, but I will find some information and get back to you” and then do that. Also, don’t tell others about it. My mom was so excited when I started my first cycle that she ran next door and told the neighbor, who congratulated me. I was mortified.
It was for us or pain in tummy we talk warm hot water bottle and lie on sofa and cuddle up her dad so she not afraid we say todo it at school some children can be nasty wee know what to do wee will hope it be ok
Educate her and let her know your always there for her when she needs you.
Take her for a big girl day. Go to Victoria’s secret and get her a bra. Go to lunch and just start talking to her. See if she has questions or scary concerns. Talk to her teacher reguarding the changes just incase she gets her period. Open and honest is the best
I got some books for my husband’s girls. We read them & talked about them. Then I took some of my female supplies and we cut them open to see what was inside. We poured water on them to see how absorbent they were. How much they would hold before they started to leak. I also put a tampon in a bud case to show them how it worked. And again, how much it absorbed before leaking. We made a but if a watery mess but it was fun, non threatening.
Time for training bras! I started my flow at 9 and so did several friends. That was 30 years ago so she is doing ok. As for the UTI it may just be how she was wiping herself when she went to the bathroom or not drinking enough water to keep the bacteria flushed.
she is very young but talk to her and see how she feels and go from there
Treat her well trust your motherly instinct for her doing this time…Maybe like you would have wanted to be treated during your time
I started my cycle when I was 9 and had no idea and it happened at school I thought I was bleeding to death and the kids made fun of me. Have a long talk with her before it happens to her so she knows what to expect. Might even be a good idea to have her keep a change of clothes in her locker at school just to be on the safe side with some pads too. At that age kids can be very mean and it is something that followed me the rest of my school days. You don’t want that to happen to your child.
Sit her down and DISCUSS all of this with her.
9 is not too young for reaching women hood. Buy her the monthly supplies women need and briefly explain it.
Just be there for her the age gap for 9
There is a book by American Girl that is a great conversation starter for that age. Bought it, some “reading chocolate” (actually a thing in our house), and took some time just the two of us to read the book together and discuss with my 8 year old. 9 seems scary young but our pediatrician told me that it’s happening younger and younger these days. By 9 you should at least be ready to have the conversation.
Just remember she is young in age only her body and her are going to change so fast tell her so she understands she may even know more than you realize I have 3 girls who are all Mums now and said there friends told them so much but I told the real facts Let her ask you Questions as well good luck
I grew boobs, got my period, and grew to full height at 9 years old. It was HELL. The kids picked on me for having to wear a bra and I was called green giant due to being tall. I cried all the time and hated school so much I’d call to go home damn near every day. My mom was truly amazing. She listened when I needed to vent and cry. She gave me space when I needed it. She answered any questions I had and made sure to just be a friend to me as my hormones and body changed. Just ask her what she needs and listen to her even if her requests or comments seem weird!
When my girls started to show signs we went shopping for sports bras, made she they had a to go pack for school with a pad, underwear and Ibuprofen.
When they had emotional days we had them take hot showers and/or meditate
to calm them.
Make these conversations exciting!! Even though it may seem awkward, put a spin on it to make it as easy for her as possible. You’ve got this!! It does seem early but just look at it as a jump on things before she hears from her friends or the internet. Lol
Just tell her her body’s gonna change and let her know someday she’ll get her period. My daughter went through the same thing around the same time and got her period before she turned 10. She’s 12 now and they are regular now. We know when it’s gonna start cause she’s crabby af.
Answer questions as honestly as you are able. It really sucks to have questions and not have them answered until your older
My mother also bought me a rose and a pack of m&ms. The rose for the young woman I became and the m&ms for the child I will always be. It is really beautiful to think about now
She may be young, but you always want her to feel comfortable talking with you. If her body is having these changes already, there’s no stopping it now and she may be curious already. You for sure should sit her down and have that talk with her. Explain to her what is going on with her body and what to expect. Better to have a heads up about the menstruation part and not be terrified about coming across it alone. Make a girls day just you and her to get training bras that fit and teach her how to use them. You should get her a private drawer for pads and teach her how to use them and dispose properly of them. And if you’re a house hold that uses deodorant, have that talk and supply her with some. Have that talk with her as well. You want her to be prepared, confident, and know if she has questions or concerns that she can privately talk to you any time. Good luck mama, mines ten and I’ve had to do this too, but she is now comfortable talking with me and asking questions.
My daughter and I had lots of conversations about anything and everything she had questions about (and we still do-she’s only 11), we went bra shopping and we made her the cutest fun little period pack to keep in her backpack for whenever she does start her period. It has a ziplock for dirty underwear, a ziplock with a pair of clean underwear, a few pads, a special note from me and a few candies I also found her some really amazing books in a series by American Girl (the dolls) at barns n noble. I have also shown her the benefits of running to get her frustrations and moodiness out and my heating pad since she gets cramps sometimes. Good luck!
Evening primrose oil, 2 caps a day, one in the morning, one at night, it helps a lot. Cranberry supplements for bladder health, and make sure she’s drinking LOTS of water! Get her a cool zip bag for a few sanitary items to take out and to school. Make sure she knows how to place pads properly. Make sure she knows how to wash down there properly, it’s different when they start their periods. And have a heat pack and paracetamol available if or when she needs it.
My daughter is 16 now, she started 3 years ago, and it was a rough start, but we got through it
Following. Same situation here.
Support her and pray with her.
Begin with having a conversation with her.
Has she heard the word “period” before? Explain what it is.
There are some good books you can read together, too
Usborne books do a girls book & boys book for puberty & has other things in that are good to know about. Something you can read together or read yourself to help you have the talks.
Buy her a book explaining all the changes she is or will be going through if you feel talking to her will be difficult for 1 or both of you. But always keep the lines of communication open! Also, make her an emergency kit (in a box or gym bag) of things she will need when she does start her period. A make up bag to carry in her backpack with supplies in is perfect for school or overnights with family or friends. Go shopping together for bras and get a special treat after. Make it a girls day
My daughter got her first period at 8… her pedi recommended this book… it has helped her a lot… I read it with her.
She’s 12 now and more comfortable with her body and it’s changes than I was (I started my period at school in 5th… my mom dropped me off at a gas station a few blocks from home and told me to ask a woman in there about it and get what I need, then walk home)
I started around 9 or 10… Support her in the way you wish you had support at that age… Make items available to her (razors, tampons/pads, training bras, etc) and let her know you are available if she has any questions…
I’m currently going through this with my oldest. Have an open and honest conversation with her. Be supportive and honest about the changes that are happening. Let her know that all of this is normal. You can even show her how to put pads in her underwear so she knows what to do if/when she gets her period.
Talk , have a show and tell day . Buy thing and explain how they work.
My 7 year old has been showing signs for a few months… her boobs have started and pubic hair. The dr did all the tests and said she is just an early starter and gave me the option of giving her injections to stop it. We talked to her about it and she didn’t want to stop it. Dr said it’ll probably be 2 more years before period starts so that would put her at 9.
She’s doing really good with it, but I’m not going to lie, it has been hardest on me. She’s my little girl and seeing her grow up so soon is difficult. I’ve bought her books and talked to her about her period so she is prepared.
Educate her and make sure she is prepared with supplies
My daughter is 9 and hasn’t started yet, but I gave her and her BFF a code word. If they start their period at school and need clothes or just need me, they can call me with a code word from school and I will know exactly what is going on without them having to say it in the school office.
Get the book “the care and keeping of you” for younger girls (your local library probably has it). Read it before you share it with your daughter. It covers all kinds of topics. Skin care. Healthy eating. Not just puberty. It was very helpful for me and my daughter.
The American girl books are wonderful
Amazon has a lot of good books on this and I am sure that would be a huge help.
My granddaughter hit puberty at 9 years old. I have her enrolled in a girls grow up class at my local hospital. It teaches them all about the body and what to expect going forward.
My daughter is 10 and won’t talk to me about anything so I just tell her I’m here when she has questions but we’ll need to talk eventually . Since she seems body shy I bought her a book off of Amazon for her to look thru herself.
If her breasts are starting to grow, I’d look into buying her a few bra’s, just the sport/bralette type, maybe take her with you when you buy them and let her chose one she likes.
I’d also buy some pads, show her how to use them, and explain why she needs them. Make sure you have some in her school bag at all times (just incase)
Be honest about what is happening with her body, be honest with any questions she may have.
Lastly, Goodluck!