We moved to a new town at the beginning of the school year to be closer to my husband’s job. We didn’t know anymore before moving here. School seems to be going fine for my oldest, and he says he’s friends with most of his class, but he’s being left out outside of school like birthday parties, and it’s starting to hurt his feelings. He had a birthday party pretty early on, and we invited all the boys in his class, on the invite, I put my number with the hope that maybe other parents would utilize it. Many boys came, only one parent texted me, so I don’t have barely any numbers to set up anything. He’s signed up and goes to all the after school programs offered, and has gone out for every sport except one because he really does not like it and I’m not going to make him. I guess I have a couple of questions. Is there anything more I could be doing? I don’t want to seem pushy; I know I can’t make people involve him. And how can I make him feel better and not left out? Thank you.
Find out what he likes, if not sports then drama/theatre, band… etc. There a boys and girls club after school? Depending on age it can be tough especially middle school. Try the local community center too. Some have like teen force programs to meet kids from other schools too.
I would go to a PTA meeting and meet the other parents face to face.
He will meet other kids and find new friends kids need to learn to play by them selves and entertain them selves let him be👍
Your local library may have an active children and teen area. Also if you have a YMCA, checking out what they offer is a great way to connect with families. Call the school, sometimes the teacher or principal can assist.
Have him invite a few guys over to play games or whatever boys do. Don’t wait for an invite. Be the invitee.
What about in school programs? We moved states when one kid was going into freshman year and one was going into 5th. They both joined the band program. Both made friends easily there and are now best friends with some of those kids for more than 6 years. My husband and I both got involved in the band program as well, as volunteers. This allowed us to invite other parents into the ‘mix’ and additionally show support for their kiddos as well as the rest of the band. I can say that the band is one big family. We get together quite often, just because.
How old is your son?
Help him take the initiative. He can always ask someone to come over. Works both ways.
Do you speak to parents at the school run…? Have a chat with them. And see f you can work out who is who or even ask who there child is
SPORTS PROGRAMS…always a way for kids to bond with classmates. It’s hard to break into groups when you’re new…give it time he’ll be one of the gang in no time. Next birthday plan a paintball party or lazer tag party …something they like to do in that age group. Just explain it takes time for others to get to know him. If he’s really smart he can offer tutoring for other students also. See what the school offers and if nothing he likes, community center or other groups in town.
Putting age/grade will help the rest of us in what kind of advice to give
Try getting him to invite a friend over on weekends. He has to build bonds with others, you can’t do that for him. Weekend sleep overs can help him get close to a few… then those few tend to bring in more …
Is he old enough to exchange phone numbers with friends. My oldest daughter texts her girl friends off her iPad w/just WiFi. It allows helps her make plans with others and just have someone other than parents and siblings. She of course will ask for permission once they have an idea on what they’d like to do… but not having a landline phone this works well for us
I don’t know what grade he is in but being in band helped both of my boys make new friends. We have moved twice in 3 years.
Takes time that’s all x
I agree with Kelly Kelley invite friends over to stay the weekend or invite friends over after school and spend a few hours together chilling and getting to know each other
Do you have a class directory? You could look there.
Our school has a “___ elementary class of 2029” page and I’ve met some of the parents that way by learning the child’s last name and stalking the page to see if I could find a parent. You could reach out that way.
Boy Scouts. Or martial arts as well
Invite a kid that he likes and have them go to a movie or something
He will find his place, it’s very hard as a mom
My school district makes you invite the whole class or noobe at all. I would call the school and see maybe if the teacher didn’t notify the parents that an extra kids in the class now
I take my kids to the park and they seem to make friends quickly. I also just force people to talk to me by walking up and introducing myself
Does he have a Facebook?? Have him add his friends on Facebook then make a post that says SOOO BORED what’s everybody doing tonight…somebody’s bound to answer …hell find his way just gotta open the door
Awe … I’m having issues as such with my youngest . He brought home a " friend" from school… All this friend wanted was his ps4 controllers …
I had to sit him down and have the talk and teach him where buying friendships aren’t healthy …
Moving sucks when you’re a kid. It takes a while to become one of them when they’ve been together since Kindergarden. And before you guys give me shit, I speak from experience. We were a military family and my daughter was the new kids a few times. Just love him Mom and assure him that it’s not him.
Try scouts my son is in the 4th grade and has friends in school and on the bus. The bus kids live in our neighborhood and he rides his bike with them on nice days. The ones in his class he trades parents #’'s and I will text them and see if they want to facetime or fb call each other then we set a play date and then if we all like each other then we do sleepovers. My daughter is a social butterfly and I swear every kid she meets has my phone number since kindergarten . Just give it time go to the park if he is young if he is older find some activities that your town might offer. Our library does tons of things for different age groups. We also have movies under the stars.
Have some get together a at your house. Invite a bunch of kids for a sleepover or a video game party just for fun. The more you get them together, the more they will include him as one of the guys
Stop pushing it. Kids are kids. They accept their peers first. Chill out. Settle down, get in your routine.
Do you go to church?(I’m not pushing religion on you,some churches have great youth programs)Is in he in any clubs?Also see if any thing is going on at your local library.
Sometimes it takes a little time. It took one of my daughters like half the school year when we moved. Sports helped her a lot
Parks, ride bikes, neighbors? Once he finds one it will become easier