My question is, how can I make myself trust my boyfriend? I have had many messed-up issues in past relationships, so my walls are very high, and my trust for anyone is very low. I’m 20 weeks pregnant, and it’s been difficult to believe this guy is the one for me. I cheated on him at the very beginning of our now almost two-year relationship, so I’m always going to believe one day he’ll use it as an excuse to get back at me. I’m so scared to let my walls down and give him my all and then for that to happen. My mind does not let me rest, and being pregnant doesn’t help. We live separate but have been trying to find a home big enough for both his and my kids. Any tips and tricks to ease my mind would be greatly appreciated.
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You can’t make yourself trust someone. It comes with time. I think you honestly just feel bad and have a guilty conscience for what happened in the past. If he one day uses it against you, then he isn’t the one for you. I hope you both can grow through this!
Just my personal view, but this is an issue that a counselor or therapist should help you work through over time-there are no tips or tricks for this one-too important.
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Punishing him for your mistakes doesn’t sound fair so I would say…you need to forgive yourself. Fear is not reality. Take care of yourself, your man, and your baby…enjoy this time in your life 
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You should never want to make someone do something. Then they’re not truly wanting to do it for the reasons that you so are wanting. So you would be losing from the beginning. Seek therapy it’s for the best
Your relationship doesn’t sound healthy at all and I don’t think you bringing another child into the situation is going to help at all. You guys need couples therapy asap
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Wait. You cant trust him because you cheated on him?
There’s no advice for that. He doesn’t deserve to be held accountable for your worries and mistakes. I’d suggest therapy for yourself at the very least.
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You are a cheater and somehowe he is a main problem and his fault?!
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LOL. How can he but his full trust in you?
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Hmm idk maybe don’t cheat? How are you going to cheat and then not trust him? You need you work on yourself.
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Wow these questions you cant trust him because clearly you can’t trust yourself
If he hasn’t given you any reason to not trust him, then you should. Tell him exactly how you feel about it. Communication is huge in a healthy relationship. You’ve already committed to this relationship by having his child.
Wait so you cheated on him an can’t trust him?? 
he should be the one who don’t trust you.
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Lmao the fucking questions in this group. You can’t trust him because you cheated?
This relationship doesn’t sound good you say your walls are high because of things that have happened in the past yet you cheat on him and he is the one not trusted soooo toxic
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Don’t move in together. Idk how that would make things better.
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Therapy and lots of it. I’m not saying this to be mean but you was the one unfaithful and yet you can’t trust him? You can’t punish him for your screw up thats not fair to him. He stayed with you after U cheated so he must be a faithful partner and really loves you
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Im sorry but you cheated on him so you have a guilty concense tht someone is gonna return the favor smh tht trust issue you have is nobodys fault but your own if anything he should be the one having trust issues with u. …
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Why would you cheat on someone if you claim you know the same pain. My advice is don’t be a cheater and you won’t have a guilty conscience.
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Your punishing him for what YOU did to HIM. Not what he did to you. In order to have a healthy relationship there has to be trust in order to form an unbreakable bond… Seek counseling for these problems please
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You say you can’t trust him… and yet you cheated on him? Of course he’s going to use it against you
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This screams BPD, imo. Regardless, those kids are gonna pay for the mistakes these 2 about to make. Ugh. Get help.
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Ummmm ur toxic as hell he should use that against u one day! He has every right. Ovbiously undont want to give ur all otherwise u would. If u truly loved him u would be loving him with ur all. U got some deep seeded issues hun. U shouldn’t be planni on moving in with him. Not til u fix urself not only for hi. But for ur children. Hes not the problem u r. If u cant see how hard it is to stay with someone that cheated and to put that behind u cause u love someone. Just to not be trusted by them and to know they are holding back on loving u properly because of the mkstake they made and people in their past! Ur goin to ruin this man of u dont heal urself girl! Hes strong but wont last long!
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Ew… This whole post is narcissistic and toxic, super hypocritical I’d say leave him because he deserves much better than you🤦
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Girl, you’re the cheater and the cheating dendencies are getting to you.
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You need to heal from you past relationships before jumping into a new one. I’d recommend both therapy for yourself and as a couple.
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All the people go who are laughing at this should be banned…I hope people laugh at their struggles…
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Therapy, before baby comes along . Having a baby in the picture can add more stress & you don’t want that. It’s better the devil you know sometimes. Try work on your struggles with therapy, baby steps in the right direction is better than going backwards & ending up in a much worse situation .
You cheated on him
You managed to get pregnant by him
But YOU don’t trust HIM?
I’m usually very understanding, but this one’s wild.
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You cheated & your the one with trust issues 
think it should be him not trusting you & wanting dna!! Don’t cheat if you don’t want a repeat!!!
Too late now I guess but maybe get to know someone before having their kid and not getting in a relationship when you have so much baggage? Not fair to the people you date. Projects ain’t cute.
Why are you so worried what he’s doing when you didn’t worry enough about what you were doing? If you’re afraid what goes around comes around why would you do that? I don’t have any advice except do better
so your doing what exactly? Making him feel obligated to stay because you cheated and want him to comfort you? sorry not sorry but this pisses me off. most guys I know dont like being played with. if he stayed with your ass after you let another guy in you… I’d say he loves you. not that you deserve it because he definitely deserves better.
Honestly you shouldnt be trying to stay in relationships if your just out to hurt them because you haven’t healed your past hurts.
It really only makes eveything worst and your kids will see that if their old enough.
You got pregnant you must have trusted him at some point lmao
for them to be together two years later AFTER she cheated means HE forgave her. they moved on and now she’s pregnant. of course she is going to fear the unknown… don’t we all?? they have SERIOUSLY judgemental people in here. (no, i dont think its “okay” that she cheated. but yall are acting like she should be burned at the state) to the o.p…
only YOU and your spouse can work on your issues together. i hope you guys figure it all out❤
First…forgive yourself. All your past sins are already forgiven. Each day you wake is a new you that learned more yesterday. You can’t have the ultimate reward without the ultimate leap of faith. You can’t half ass real love. You gotta jump off the cliff headfirst and blindfolded with absolute faith. If it’s not true, it’s a lesson, but WHAT IF it was real…you won’t know til you give in to it and accept the good whether you think you deserve it or not.
Darling, you need a great Counsellor because that shit will eat you alive xxx