Only thing that may help is a good lawyer and potential proof to the courts you really knew nothing of the dates, etc
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File for a hearing. When you see the judge, be apologetic. Donāt go in there making demands. The courts have already determined you are unfit (Iām not saying I agree with the decision, but thatās what they did). And ask what you can do to get your kids back, they will give you a list of guidelines you must meet. DO THEM. All of them. And ask for some type of visitation while your accomplishing what the courts ask. I really donāt know what else you could do. Good luck.
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The first half of this story could have been reversed but tack on the last half and youāre screwed.
You need to contact other attorneys because, depending on what kind of ātroubleā you were in, you should have a case. I would also gather all phone records for as far back as you can, to prove there wasnāt any contact and that she still had contact information. Also, check local papers, because when an address is unknown and they attempt to serve court papers, a judge can allow āservice by publicationā in the town of the last known addressā¦which means they publish an ad in the local newspaper attempting to contact you that way.
Get a lawyer because somethings not right.
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You would have possibly had a workable case prior to you and your husband getting in trouble. However, depending on what type of trouble you may have no chance at least for a while. Once losing kids itās such a process to get them back. Iāve watched friends and family go through it.
Like others are saying, gather all evidence, and contest. Contest, contest, contest. When you DO get your kids back, time to leave state and go no contact. Iām so confused on how you were never made aware of the counseling or court dates. Honestly, set up cameras around your house. Theres a chance shes been tampering with your mail. It would make sense on why you two never received any notices. Def find another lawyer, and even seek out a possible restraining order. Best advice I can give. And good luck!
If you can prove you werenāt contacted for court, Iām sure a judge will listen. You never give up the fight honestly depends what happen to why you didnāt have them .a judge will respect your choice to where kids do go . So does cys . File and explain she cut you out completely.
Notify the courts that you never received any mail from them about when you were to go to court or counseling. See what address they have on file for you.
Get an attorney and start therapy yourself. Parenting classes as well as psychologically taking care of your issues. Good luck!
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Check into rehab if your marriage is toxic him or you are using get help as soon as possible itās only temporary for now but if you donāt follow whatever they say in a year they can be granted full custody I know this for a fact because Iāve done it and they took my ex mother-in-law to take my kids for a whole year I never gave up 18 months sober and I got granite full custody back in November you can do this go to counseling I know it may seem like a lot on your case plan but one thing at a time never give up theyāre so worth it by the way Iām recovering addict we do recover
Get your shit together, get professional help, maybe go to meetings and be accountable for your ātroubleā. Volunteer for drug testing, get counseling on your own. Take parenting classes on your own. Take the initiative yourself donāt wait for the court. No judgement because Iāve personally experienced it. Save your money. Get a Guardian ad Litem if you can. Hire a new lawyer. And pray.
You fucked up. Own that shit and move forward love.
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Best of luck your kids are counting on you
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No matter how flat a pancake is, it still has two sidesā¦
talk to a lawyer and make sure you and hubby are doing all things right
Grow up and think about your kids and not yourself.
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There is no way thatās all there is to it. What you got in ātroubleā for that was glazed over in this post was what she got your kids for and the fact that when you got in ātroubleā you lived in the in laws back yard means they donāt trust anyones judgment on the property. Bet the ātroubleā was drugs or alcohol. Best way to get your kids back is get your shit together.
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Also the fact that you didnāt see a councilor or follow up with the court is SKETCH.
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You need to have the other party file and seek out a better lawyer. An advocate will be appointed for the children and new court dates will be set. You definitely need the children go have advocates because they arenāt on anyoneās side but the kidsā. Beyond that, I donāt know. Iād have to know more about the personal aspects of it and I am not a lawyer so I cannot give legal advice.
In order for ur mother to get temporary custody she has to have proof that where they were wasnt safe and they were not being taken care of properly. The court doesnāt just grant temporary custody for not following a visitation schedule. Temporary guardianship is a legal term its physical paper work that is notarized by the state and filed with the courts. Now if ur in laws legally had that they were doing something like not following the plan set forth by the court to have the court give ur mother temporary custody when they are already under temporary guardianship. It doesnāt matter who u think is the best person to be with ur kids. They care who can prove they can take care of the kids and who is willing to. They try to keep it with the family. If the court feels one family member is better suited then thatās the person the court will give the kids too.
Youād have to contact an attorney for advice every state is different. She clearly has some kind of legal leg to stand on if she was awarded custody. She must also have some type of proof of service that court documents were served to you on the case. This sounds like an awful situation and Iām so sorry you and your kids are involved in it.
My heart is broken for u
What an ugly situation.
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Seems as if the ātroubleā youāre in is enough for the courts to make the decision that your kids are better off with your mother. You must overcome your ātroubleā.
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If you were never served with the summons for court, you can get a lawyer to get you an emergency hearing to get your children back. Did you give legal custody? In front of a judge, etcā¦? If you just wrote it down on some paper and had it notarized, thatās not always good enough. Find a competent lawyer first.
If the grandma had no relationship with the kids and won a custody order and has them you and your husband obviously arenāt doing what your supposed to be for your kids and leaving out a ton of information seems like your whole point is bitterness towards your mother whoās raising your children because you canāt and Iām guessing if she wants custody now she prob did want a relationship with them and you stopped that for your own personal reasons
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Not judging! Buut it sounds like drugs. First things first. Make sure youre clean and attending NA. They can ask you to test at any time to determine if you are a threat to the children. Yall gave Grams ammunition. If she IS a controlling narcissistic type, youve kinda already lost. You gave her the upper hand. It will be a long road to get it back. You need proofs. All sorts of proofs. Like, call records showing no one ever called, proof you werenāt sent due notice, any proof she essentially kidnapped the children. You need witnesses. Witness statements from your in laws. Information about them, why theyd be a better fit. Go to legal aid. Show em what you got and see where they can get you. Especially now w covid the court system is slow as molasses. It could be years before this is right if a good lawyer doesnāt intervene. Get clean. Stay clean. Number 1 priority. Even before your children. How can you help them if youre messing around in the streets like you a kid w no responsibility? You let Grams win. Good luck to you tho.
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No matter how hard you donāt ever give up your kids. They are your kidsā¦You do what you have to do. Grow up, work your butt off and do whatever is necessary for them to be happy, healthy and in a stable environment.
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Maybe instead of sitting back pretending the court order wasnāt there for a year and a half. Pretty much ignoring itā¦ you should have been on top of it?
Also, itās clear what ever ātroubleā you got into your mother found outā¦ My guess is she didnāt feel your children were safe in your careā¦ or living nextdoor at your in-lawsā¦
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Couldāve been an exparte order they donāt really need evidence for that. In my experience. And they show up with officers to remove the kids. They also do an emergency hearing within 72 hours to grant guardianship. Parents arenāt always notified. If thats the case she doesnāt have to prove you unfit she only has to prove she is more fit as a guardian.
The lawyer is right! You ignored the courts order and that ātroubleā yāall got into is what made your mom win custody of the kidsā¦ unless thereās a court order that you can visit with your kids your mom doesnāt have to let you see themā¦
Get a lawyer. That is your only option as per your post. And because you gave guardianship to your inlaws they should also be getting a lawyer if the guardianship was legal, meaning you went to court and have paperwork on this happening. Be prepared for this to take a long time to rectify
There must be more to this story. A lot more.
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Seek and find Yemaja, canāt solve an issue at the level it was created.
I read it to understand that you were āplanning to give your in-laws custodyā but Iām reading like this all happened before that could take place. I understand via this comment that you were planning to give that temp custody to your in-laws next door until you could get on your feet. I agree that them getting to stay in the same school & have as little changes as possible through this tough time would have been a great thing, however, this was not ever put in place. Iām not judging or condoning the fact that you were āwillingā to sign your kids over to your in-lawsā¦ but Iām also not going to tell you that I understand! The trouble you got into, well, I hate to say it, must have been some felonies that were pretty serious! Again, 100% no judgement from this Momma. I had major drug & alcohol issues up until some years ago, unfortunately I was already married and had my first baby & she was very young, but still in the mix of it. I felt like the worst parent in the world, we make mistakes, we all do, some are bigger than othersā¦ just pick yourself back up and get it right this time, never stop trying and giving it your all. I was blessed that my husband gave me another change and supported me through treatment and all of my post treatment meetings, and etc which still continue to this day. Iām blessed beyond all measure that he was and is such a great dad and cared for our daughter wonderfully!! I also have parents and grandparents that helped out, like A TON, and they all bent over backwards to make sure everything was taken care of, took care of my daughter while my husband was working and etc. I sad in jail and missed my daughters 1st birthday! I will NEVER FORGET THAT! Luckily she doesnāt remember, but I always will!! I am so lucky that DCFS never got involved and that my family was supportive instead of manipulating. I am trying not to judge your mother here also, I think there are parts missing and itās possible that she truly did what she thought was best if you guys are still āstruggling ā. Listen, again, we screw up, MOVE on!! Pick yāall selfs up and do whatever it takes. A judge gave me credit for working so hard in treatment and giving my all to get my life back and doing everything in my power to be a better personā¦ I have been sober since and work at it every day! Be grateful for the little things, from someone who has also had a tumultuous relationship with my own mother, but at least they didnāt get taken and put in foster care with strangers. Maybe please donāt get mad, maybe this is what you needed for a wake up call & to get that boot in the behind and jump start that āgetting back on your feetā. I donāt mean that to be hateful at all, but it obviously happened for a reason. Whatever that reason, use it as your reason to do better. Find out what the courts are going to recommend or get your parenting plan and also your plan for the trouble you got into. Whatever they āthinkā or ārecommendā that you do, do it, do it 2x and do it thoroughly! Just remember your babies need you. And although I feel that there is so much of this story missing, Iām still saying that you can do this! Donāt take the easy way out and leave out vital info that may make you look bad, just own it! They will see you as someone who wants to be a good mother if you can admit your mistakes or problem and try to fix it! Donāt let anyone make you feel bad for the decisions you have made. We have all made them. I still believe that you love your children! When you do get to see them, just show them that love and the positive change in you. Donāt tAlk bad about your mom in front of them and donāt blabber negative crap about it all and the case and etc. remind them you love them and are doing everything you can to be the best mommy to them as possible. Right now they might be confused but if this is a conspiracy and you really have been done wrong, they will see that eventually. Everything that happens in the dark, always comes to light! You have my prayers!!!
I have never heard of a grandparent being able to take the grandkidās with out very good reason 
just for not going to court isnt a good reason, that doesnāt make u a bad parent & itās up to U who your children see not your motherās, this isnāt making much sense to me, there has to be more to this story
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u are so lyingā¦girl please! just the simple fact u were willing to give ur kids away speaks everything about u and this case. donāt blame ur mom for trying to give those babies the life they deserve bcz u sure are not
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Get a lawyer and get this post off of social media.
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Hope it works out maybe get an attorney
I feel as though theres more to this story, things dont play out like this unless theres a lot going on.
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Get an attorney that specializes in family court
As a someone who works in child welfare this donāt make sense and thereās more to the story. I would need more info to give you the best advice.
Also, IDK if what state youāre in but in California you have to be served about a court date. Physically and there has to be proof. Also no judge will award temporary guardianship without cause. I would like to see how your mother proved to the court she had you served about the court date.
You need an attorney. Start therapy and parenting classes to show the court you are working on it. But I canāt stress enough the importance of an attorney. They will intervene on your behalf and put a stop to this nonsense.
Sounds like you need a better lawyer to Go over your case and see what can be done canāt believe she could take the children away from you if your decent parents
I fought for 2 yrs and jumped threw all the hoops. Meaning parenting classes, counseling, therapy, drug testing, etcā¦
I won custody back of my kids but they chose to stay with their father. He wasnāt involved in their lives until I messed up and the courts forced him to be a dad. So I hope the best for you.
Ask for a court appointed attorney. You wonāt have to pay and theyāll work with you on what you need to do.
For some more perspective? I have my grandkids. And let me tell you it is NOT easy to get them. That was not my goal. My goal was to keep their family intact for them. Mom found a guy on Craigslist and took off after him. Baby was picked up 3 days later after my son chased her down in a motel with a filthy diaper she falsely (and it was false because I was there) accused my son of domestic violence. He had to go to strong fathers just to get visitation (her case was thrown out after it was proven that he didnāt hurt her she said what bf told her to say) and DCF still insisted I take her and let her hang out with a junkie with an 8 page police record until one day they finally got caught. She had nowhere to go and a baby that had rsv so many times in one year they thought she had cystic fibrosis. All that and it took getting caught with a methhead to get her. Meanwhile, dad has never done drugs in his life. A policeman moved in as his roommate and that is what it took to fix the situation. Because liars repeat. There was a policeman (the roommate) present when she lied the second time. He saw everything and told them it was a verbal argument. Thatās it. They still allowed her custody of the youngest In full liberal visitation with the oldest ( she was 6 at this time)because we have had her since she was six months old and she was left with us to babysit and never picked up) at that time she was six they finally granted me custody after they caught her little sister she 2. The baby Iām referring too living in a unheated little storage shed with no electricity in the middle of the winter since sheās been with us sheās come out of failure to thrive and has not had RSV once she is her ideal weight and slowly working on language skills and potty training. Iāve had her 3 years now and she is still behind. I have them both and this mother things she is Jesus. So yeah def two sides to every story
No, I said casa worker,court appointment worker to talk for the kids
Find out who the case worker is a set up a meeting
I think you need to get a good lawyer.