Sorry for the long post. 2 years ago, I told my mother that she and I should seek counseling with her pastor at her church before she would see my kids again due to arguing and stuff in front of my kids. She has never been a mother to me and even has told me that everyone would be better off without me several times. I gave her a chance to be a grandma, and I regret it more than ever. When I told her we should get counseling, she filed for visitation. Grandparents don’t have many rights in my state. After mediation, she was awarded visitation as long as she and I attended family counseling together. That was November 16th, 2020. She never called or texted my kids for holidays or birthdays. Then last month, I was told that she could see my children cause she has been going to counseling. (As part of our agreement, the courts were supposed to pick where we went to counseling) I was never informed where that was or anything. Fast forward to Friday; my mother removed my children from school with three police officers because she was granted temporary guardianship. We have NEVER notified of a court date or anything like that. She also said I was in contempt of the visitation order cause I changed my phone number due to getting a new phone. She has my husband’s number and hasn’t tried once to contact him. She knows where we live and hasn’t tried to come here once. My kids haven’t seen her in 1 1/2 years. My youngest somehow thought she would take him from us. She won by default (cause we weren’t aware we had court). Recently, hubby and I got into trouble. (No judgment please) We had decided to give temporary guardianship to my in-laws while we got back on our feet and stuff. My in-laws are my neighbors, so my kids have a great relationship with them; they could stay in the same school, we would continue our relationship with them, etc. A lawyer told me that because of how we basically ignored the court’s visitation order that no judge would trust our opinion on who would be better to place our kids with and wouldn’t take the case. My mother won’t let us see our babies, talk to them, or anything. I don’t know what to do. I’m heartbroken, and it’s getting worse by the minute. Any advice on what I could do to get my kids out of her home and back here where they belong?
So where have your subpoenas been going? How was she able to do this with no rights?
Shit talk to a different lawyer. It is possible to win a case when you can prove you didn’t get notice of a court date
This sounds like a horror movie. All mother aren’t angels some real toxic.sorry for what you are going through
I’m sorry but I feel like there’s huge chunks of this missing…
Finding this hard to believe. But…
Okay
I’m sorry you are going through this. It sounds insane. I cant help but think some things are missing. How can your mother just take your children? Were you involved with CPS, facing charges for something? Doing drugs? Your mother sounds sick. And why are you asking to place your children with inlaws instead? Why cant your children live with you? This is very very bizarre.
In Tennessee grandparents can go to the police station say your kids are in trouble and get temporary custody
I had a dcfs case years ago, due to drugs use and going to prison. All I can say is that you need to do everything they tell you to do. There is definitely some of this story missing, cause no one can just take your kids for no reason. You need to contact whatever agency has appointed them to your mom, dcfs, cps, whatever is in your state. They’ll give you a placement plan. Follow it. And you’ll get your kids back before you know it. I didn’t follow mine, ultimately I lost custody of my children. This was 9 years ago. I just recently got in contact with there adoptive mom and was able to have communication. Good luck. 
To regain custody I would say you need to listen to the courts and do what the recommend.
This seems odd…
go to the court with the other grandparents and have them petition for emergency custody is my only though
Find a different lawyer and handle it all in the courts
Get a better lawyer asap.
There’s GOT TO BE MORE to this story.
Get an attorney and go to the courthouse or court library and file against it.
Sorry i do not believe this story at all. 🤷
Kids are not just taken away for no reason. That’s against the law by itself. Something is left out of this story. If that was the case everyone that had problems with their in-laws would be missing their kids. Your mother would not ever see those kids again if I was in your shoes
1st thing go down to the courts and make sure they had your correct address on file! They may have sent your summons to an old address.
I have a toxic, narcissist of a mother. She told my eldest daughter that me and her father abandoned her when she was one.
Like wtf, then she offered to buy me a house if I aborted my second child.
My mother has money and bribes my eldest daughter. My other 3 have nothing to do with her. All kids have same dad. To this day my eldest hasn’t spoken to me in almost 15 yrs.
Money certainly talks
One you gave guardianship to your in-laws so your in-laws needed to go to that hearing. You aren’t their guardians at this time so your in-laws need to get them back if I can follow the story correct.
There has to be more to this they don’t just give kids to the grand parents. The fact you already gave your in-laws guardianship does not look good on you all fighting to get them back. If she is that toxic call dcs and they will decide who is the best fit
Can’t give the correct advice without the truth and you’re clearly not telling it.
For y’all saying you don’t believe her, trust me, this happens more than you think.
You need a lawyer. Your situation will be state specific. Now, bc you weren’t notified of therapy, they’ll ask why you didn’t call. You have no excuse bc it’s your responsibility to follow the courts order.
Start researching state custody laws bc YOU need to know. Don’t count on a lawyer, judge or anyone else solely. Call and find out what therapist you’re to see & start immediately.
Request a Guardian Ad Litem through the courts. Their job is to speak for your children. Not you. Not her. Them. Get right whatever isn’t before court BC they will deep dive.
Again, research state laws & know as much as possible.
While not admissable, you can request a polygraph if she’s lying about you. Just trust me on this. Take UT if you have nothing to hide.
If there’s other lawyers in the area, see all of them.
Ask questions & hire one who will fight. It won’t be cheap but you really have no choice.
What did yall get in trouble for? This may have given her the grounds to file for temporary custody.
Sorry but I think there’s a lot missing. There’ll have been papers served on you for court
Theres more to this story…
What kind of trouble? Why would you sign away your KIDS
What state? Is CPS involved? The court usually has to show proof of notice? And provide you a copy of the report.
wow I can’t believe this…I would go get a plane on her and say some shit…how can this happen? doesn’t seem legal how this happened…
Some thing don’t sound right
Once you give up guardianship/custody of your kids, other people have more rights than you do. I was told this years ago by a lawyer when my parents wanted guardianship of my kids because (their logic, not mine) “they could provide better insurance for them”… That’s why I never did it…and am thankful I consulted with the lawyer first.
It depends on what kind of trouble you and your husband got into and whether your in laws were keeping your kids safe from your trouble…or allowing them to go to your home whenever. As far as the not getting notice…not to sure about that, because they would have to have proof of being served??
Something’s off.
We aren’t getting all of the info.
How can we give solid advice if we don’t have all of the facts.
Hun, call an attorney. That’s all I got.
The trouble ur husband got into for ur in laws to have Guardianship involves drugs been there done that, family court would have known that ur in laws has the legal right not u, and since at this time u technically have the bare minimum of legal rights to ur children u actually legally have no say into where they go or who they live with don’t like hurry up and get on ur feet and do that child protective services tell u to do but the way I read this and from my own personally situation there is nothing u can do, and if the courts gave her visitation rights and u didn’t follow that then yes u r in trouble for it… further more there is grandparents rights to visitation but they r limited and in certain situations which also tells u r not being completely honest in what u said here
You are not telling the whole story. Be honest if you want advice.
Honestly something is very wrong here. We all would love to help with advice but unfortunately we are not getting the whole story dear. We could help better and not judge if you just put the whole story. Can’t help with big information left out though… x
Turn it all over to God!
Without information about the kind of trouble, why the courts and police removed your children, and what state you’re in, you’re basically not going to get a lot of information. This is all important information to give an accurate answer. Maybe repost your question with that information, given that the page can post it anonymously.
I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say there’s vital peices of this story missing, which means that honestly no one here is going to be able to give you good or accurate advice.
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First grandparents getting visitation rights…even in states that have them…its still pretty rare for them to actually be granted unless one of the biological parents has passed away and the living parent is withholding.
Other than that…its really rare and usually only in more extreme circumstances. -
If you gave guardianship to your in-laws already then that summons would have/should have gone to them. The counseling contact should have been with them…not you. Not to mention, if you gave them guardianship to keep them from being taken from you…then they should not have been living at your home. That alone, could have had them removed from your/your in-laws care.
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If you had not given guardianship over yet and was working on doing so…then what kind of trouble were you/are you in? Is CPS involved (with all you’ve mentioned they’d almost have to be)? What has CPS said? Were your children getting removed from your custody? You dont always get to choose. Since you do live so close to your in laws it could have been considered a conflict of interest.
Without more facts it’s hard to give real advice.
All I can say is listen to CPS and the judge. Take the steps they’re requiring you to take…and do not drag your feet on cooperating.
Def pieces missing. But keep a paper trail of everything you do from here on out. Every counseling session drug screen everything!!!
There’s a lot missing to this story. No court just gives guardianship no grandparents and allows them to go pick your kids up at school without some major court being involved and you and your husband certainly would have been there.
Sorry. But there has to be more to this. Or whatever trouble you got into is more serious than you are letting in. They would not just grant custody to someone else over nothing. And did they take custody from you or the in laws because it’s not very clear who had custody when.
You have a very difficult ride. Stick to your guns. Stay out of trouble and do whatever you have to within the law. Good luck. I will say a prayer for you.
An emergency order does not require a court hearing that day. U should b contacted about a scheduled hearing and u need 2 get an atty that specializes in custody.
I’m going though somethigg my similar and have been for almost two years. My advice is to just never give up and keep calling lawyers till you find one. And be proactive. I’ve messed up lots of my life and I don’t judge you at all… so whatever you did-make sure that you’re doing everything AND more than the courts would ask you to do, so you already have it in place. Start with a counselor, a drug and alcohol facility/counselor if needed(do an evaluation for both (regardless) parenting classes, anything you can think. Literally do all of it and it will be much better for you in the future. good luck to you I’m praying for you and your kids!! Be nice to your mother regardless how bad it hurts so you can document it and show it to the court.
Is it really a thing, not being notified of court summons??? That’s terrifying…
Something not right with this story more to it and what your saying 
To the author of this post:
If you’re looking for all our opinions, we need the whole truth and more details. Please update.
From my understanding, it’s very difficult to have custody removed from BOTH parents and given to grandparents… that your children don’t have a true relationship with.
Something else had to have happened for your mom to do this. Not here to judge - it’s just that advice might be different if we knew the truth.
Because of my past struggles with substance abuse and addiction as well as going thru something kinda similar; the missing peice in my opinion probably has to do with drugs/alcohol abuse…at least I hope nothing very serious like child/sexual abuse. Anyways my advice? Get your ass and your husband’s to the nearest treatment center and get evaluated for drug treatment or medication assisted therapy/intensive out patient programs. Get enrolled in therapy like yesterday. Hit up some NA or AA classes even online during free time which sounds like you have right now. If you can afford it Google court approved parenting classes, sign up and get moving on them and get the completion cert sent and get copies made for court or cps agent or guardian ad lietum; whoever ends up stepping in to help navigate this. Believe it or not judges want kids back with parents even when there’s been past mistakes. They just want kids in safe stable and loving environment and you and your husband need to do everything in your power to show them whatever was done no matter how recent, that you own it and you acknowledge you both need some help and your main goal is to do whatever necessary to get those kids back in your care. Even if the kids come back, the best advice I can truly give is keep yourself (husband too!) in counseling NO MATTER WHAT. CONTINUE IT TIL THE DAY YOU DIE IF NEED BE. DO NOT just do what you gotta to get kids back and stop holding yourself accountable. Good luck.
There has to be some details you’re skipping.
Unfortunately, I’ve dealt first hand with custody, Family courts, a parent getting into “trouble”, etc…
And if you’ve lost full custody to a grandparent, you’ve done something pretty awful. get a lawyer, get on the right path and cross your fingers. You’re going to need to work HARD and love HARDER
I would file with court and tell them everything
Taking gentle parenting classes. Document. (They even have free ones online)
If addiction was involved, participate in recovery support groups. Document.
If there was any domestic violence, take an offender course (ie New Choices), and show continued therapy for skill building. Document.
Do all the counseling. Individual, couples/family. It shows you are actively working on yourself and building skills. Document.
Were finances an issue? Take a finance class. Create a budget. Show a 5 year plan that includes child expenses. The court wants to see that you have a long term financial plan that covers your children’s needs.
Make sure home is clean, full of food, toys, furniture, clothes, and lots of areas for the kids. Include a fire safety plan, emergency disaster plan, and hang on fridge. Actual practice. If needed purchase fire ladders, smoke alarms, etc. Document.
Become certified in adult and infant CPR.
Lock up all medications and cleaning supplies.
Review if you need more training, a new skill, or new job options (voc rehab counts addiction as a disability and can be a great place to do this).
Show effort. Are you allowed to send cards, gifts, money, have phone calls, etc? Do whatever you can to show effort towards the children.
Request school records, IEPs, ask who the teachers are, etc. Even if you don’t get them, you can show you tried.
Stay respectful. Clean up your social media squeaky clean. Try to be as nice to the guardian as possible.
Get a lawyer if possible. Show the courts why you deserve your kids back and what you’ve done to change. If you can’t get custody yet, ask for more visitation, even if it has to be supervised. Always show up.
Also, really reflect on if you’re ready. Is this for you or the children. Be honest with yourself. Sometimes, it can take time to become stable again. Always think about what environment is best for the kids. If you want that to be with you, use your energy to grow into the best parent you can be.
They would not award her guardianship if you hadn’t gotten in trouble for a child abuse and neglect case. I am visitation supervisor for children in the dfs system and foster care. Your best bet is to work the program and fight for supervised visitation while your work your program.
She must have filed for an emergency change of custody in which the judge saw it was evident and granted it. Now there should be an expedited hearing that follows after in which you have to be served. Once you are served you need to file your rebuttal for her accusations. Get a family lawyer you may need it.
I’ve never heard of anybody getting their kids taken due to a visitation violation. If they did fathers every where would be getting their kids from their mothers. Theirs more to the story and grandma has something on y’all
There is something big missing from this story… I’ve never heard of anyone granting guardianship like that for missed visitation with grandparents. Especially since she has no actual proof that she tried to contact you and you ignored it…
Something if off here, I’m sure we are missing some of the story. All I can say is follow what the courts and your lawyer tells you to do. Maybe get your in-laws to try and file for custody.
Something is missing
This whole story just doesn’t make sense
I know it doesn’t even matter now but when you didn’t receive anything why did you not start making phone calls or taking trips to the courthouse to see what was going on with your case. It’s like you just sat and waited instead of taking charge of the situation. And what kind of trouble did you get into? Has there been a history of that trouble? I feel like we’re not getting the whole story so I don’t know how much help or even sympathy you’re going to get here 
Uhh grandparents get no rights until something bad happens to both parents.
Very vague. Get a lawyer go to actual therapy not a church.
So here’s the thing we aren’t lawyers we can’t give you legal advice. I really can’t give you any advice based on your post cuz I don’t know what happened. I know for a fact if you are on drugs your kids get taken away from you and if you abuse or neglect your children, they will get removed from you. No one is judging you…we just want to know the whole story.
As you said, It’s “temporary guardianship”. The courts will tell you what to do to get your kids back.
Get a lawyer and do what she says. Get therapy and follow the steps to work on your self to be healthy to get your kiddos back. Don’t give up. Your mother is clearly sick and I am sorry she is making the situation worse but getting your self together and healthy is the best way to give her the middle finger. Take care of yourself you can do it and for your babies 
I’m guessing there is more to this story, because there is a lot that doesn’t make sense. The only way is to get a lawyer to help you make sense of it all, because you don’t seem to have a real clear understanding of what’s happened.
Your mom has issues.
My question is did YOU ever try to make contact with your mother pertaining to the courts orders that YOU in fact did know about when you weren’t notified by the courts - these are your children and it is your responsibility to abide by the courts ruling in such matters - it is not the court or your mother’s duty to put your ducks in a row. You should have been the one to contact your mother with the new phone number bc it seems the situation at hand was between you and your mother and did not involve your husband at the time of the visitation hearing and it seems that you made no effort to abide the visitation orders given regardless of the rest of the things such as the counseling you were both to attend. Your mother did what she was suppose to do but it seems you didn’t bother. For whatever reason the courts awarded her temporary guardianship bc she in fact did as she was suppose to and you failed to do your part. Now it’s entirely up to you to go to the courts and find out who they want you to council with and get the ball rolling on your end - do what you were suppose to do to begin with and things will work out as they should - whatever trouble you and your spouse got into needs to be cleared as well before without a doubt the courts will even allow you supervised visitation. The ball is in court now and it’s completely up to you on how you proceed with it. Not sure if CPS was involved or not but from the way you have put things your mom did as she was suppose to and you didn’t and that is why she has your kids and you don’t. Not judging you or anything but if you want your kids do as the courts told you to do plus whatever else needs to be done to get them back. Good luck.
Question what kind of trouble that u was going to give your kids to your n laws
You dont just “win by default” when it comes to taking your children, there is more to the story and if you want honest opinions, feed back, and advise on what to do then you need to give the full story
Seems like the story is missing a lot of pieces!
Typically if you are served with court papers they are certified mail that you or your husband would have had to sign for. Get yourselves a lawyer and get to the bottom of this. And a family therapist not a church type therapist.
Seems like there is a shitload missing from this story tbh
How would kids be taken from you if the in-laws were granted temporary custody? Your mom would have to prove that THEY aren’t fit because they are the legal guardians. Something seems off here.
Also If you got new number you should have immediately given the number to your mom. She is under no obligation to contact you through your husband’s phone number.
Also take some ownership here, you were told to go to therapy with your mom and made NO attempt to figure out where. In my state a court is not going to tell you where to go, they would just order therapy and it’s on you to find a therapist and abide by the order. They aren’t out shopping therapist, rehabs, etc for people - literally not their job.
Children are only removed from their parents care by the courts if they have enough evidence to do so. Your husband and yourself have done wrong, do the right thing and you will see your children again. Time to prove yourselves.
My guess is that there are drugs involved. Go to rehab, stop blaming other people, take responsibility for your actions, go to some NA meetings, get a sponsor, and do what the courts have told you to do to get your kids back.
What kinda trouble tho? Grandparents don’t typically just get awarded custody🤷🏻♀️This story definitely has more to it
Your not giving the full story becuase they wouldn’t just give your mom guardianship of your kids for no reason, in order to get good advice we need the full story
Get another lawyer. And make sure they know everything. Good luck to you.
Your kids are living with someone they barely know and you wonder if you should be fighting for them?!?!
I feel sorry for the kids being used as ping-pong balls becos the adults cannot get their act together
“I didn’t know” is not a defense at all. They are YOUR children, you should be on top of this stuff.
Also,they don’t give custody away to grandma just because she asked. There has to be grounds to take them and apparently there was.
And it’s not “She doesn’t let me see my babies” no. If they gave her guardianship, visitation would be in the orders.
Assuming she isn’t violating HER orders the either no visits are being allowed or you aren’t doing what the court ordered to be awarded visitation.
Perhaps not passing a drug test? this screams drugs to me.
Story sounds incomplete but wish you all the best
It was your court case a lot of states have case updates online. Where is your lawyer? Why aren’t you taking to them instead of asking people who def aren’t qualified. What the court saw was you not working the court order and not being the best place for your kids. You don’t really have any rights right now. You signed them away to your inlaws and the courts gave the kids to your mom. At least she had some sense and got into therapy. Maybe that’ll help the kids deal with this messed up situation they e been forced into.
As an aside GPR is a big deal I urge everyone to have a general knowledge before handing over kids for any length of time.
Custody isn’t just awarded to grandparents without good reason including proof your not giving the full story
Don’t do drugs kids !
I have to agree with you everyone else. Something is off. If they don’t support grandparents rights in your state then the only way a grandparent is even awarded visitation is A. If the child(ren) parent is passed away or B. If the children’s parent is away at war. Maybe some other issues like unfit parents but not sure on that. How do I know? My grandchild’s nana tried to pull that. I was allowing her to see her grandchild while her son was away at training in the army. The day I tell her no on seeing her was a day we had plans and she literally asked 20 min. Before we were walking out the door. She got upset and threatened to walk in our house and snatch her and “I couldn’t say no” because she was going to go get rights. Of course my lawyer told me not to worry about it plus I had proof of working with her and being away for training- I didn’t even have to let her have his visitation it wasn’t a right for that situation. So I called and talked to her dad and then retalked to her and said she either drop the bs and we worked together or she could just wait till her son came home to see her. I had all the proof I had went beyond working with her saved and documented everything. (Happy ending by the way- she cut the bs lol and we now get along great )
All I can say is you can either A. Go talk to your lawyers B. If your going to ask a question be honest.
I send no judgement on if you needed help and got said help from your in laws. But I feel like there is more to the story on that. Maybe drugs? Maybe violence in the home? Something! What ever it is I advice you to get with your lawyers, find out what it is you need to do to get back custody, and grind those gears on getting it done. If they say rehab - book it. If they say parenting classes - take them. First step is acknowledging there is an issue somewhere and then getting back on your feet.
Self-reflection is a very valuable tool! Good luck and many prayers for you!
Never give up your kids for nothing it hard to get them back and all that fine u wasted
Sorry for the dumb question. Is there really an order granted?? I think it’s crazy how they got temporary custody without you being served proper documentation . Not sure what city or state you live. But in arizona there is access to family court cases online where you can see if there are hearings, custody orders changed, statuses on child support orders. I wanna see if there really is something in place and I’m sure you do too
You need to get a lawyer ASAP
Get a lawyer. A good one. Keep documentation. Record conversations you have with CPS (not sure what it’s called where you’re at) and grandparents. Keep record of everytime you call/speak/or see your kids. As someone who lost her kids and was railroaded by CPS I can understand why there’s holes and missing pieces, lawyers looked at my case and said they didn’t understand what happened. And don’t ever stop fighting. I fought for almost 2 years. It was hell. But doing everything we did, we ended up winning in the end.
Sounds like your in-laws need to file to get the kids back in their custody. You need to go to family court ask them to assign a free lawyer. Your in laws need one as well. The court will appoint lawyers to each person and a representative for the kids. That’s the first steps, without a lawyer it’s going to be near impossible. Best of luck to y’all.
It sounds like they were awarded an ex parte emergency order based on whatever mistake you guys made, making you unfit. I suggest showing up to the court date in 10 days, or however long the emergency order was granted for, with a lawyer.
This happened to me. My father and step mom have more money then God, they paid CPS. CPS is corrupt. They social workers get bonuses for every child they remove from a home. I’m praying for you
Get a lawyer and file an appeal asap. If that doesn’t work, ask the court steps to regain custody. If anything, your in laws should file for custody since they have a good relationship with the children and has their best interest
You need a new lawyer. Now.
What state do you reside?
I would get a lawyer and find out what kind of papers were filed
People mess up and it sounds like you and hubby did in the past. I’m not judging, it sounds like you are trying to do better. But, there seems to be way more going on than what you could write here.
That being said, the courts like the children to be with their parents especially if they are willing to work on being better parents.
Do what needs to be done legally and don’t mess up anything in anger. It’ll just make things worse. Unfortunetly, it’s going to take time.
Request an emergency hearing and request that an Guardian Ad Litem be assigned. That way your children will have outside representation to determine what’s best for them. If your in-laws have legal guardianship already they should fight the judgment. It’s one thing for the courts to deem you unfit but if the kids were already in the care of your in-laws they weren’t deem unfit. I would also mention a concern for the children’s mental health being placed in the care of someone they haven’t seen in a long period of time and having their life uprooted.
U need a lawyer, and you need to appease the courts. The decision has already been made on your parenting skills, (not saying that I agree but idk the details) so all you can do is what the court tells you to do. Idk your situation, and I am certainly not passing judgement, but the lack of attention you gave this situation to begin with cannot go on. You will have to follow any and all rules that the court gives you now to prove that you are the best option for your children. The system is not always correct, but in this case, you will have to jump through their hoops. I wish you luck and pray for the best outcome for your children!!