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QUESTION:
"My son is a single Daddy of 2 young children. He works nights, so myself & the other Grandmother pitches in with taking care of the children. A part of me feels bad for thinking this, but the other part says it way overdue. But how do I tell him I can no longer babysit? Mind you, I also work 40+ hours a week. I’m home for 15 minutes & then they’re coming in. I love them all more than anything, but I have put my life on hold to help take care of the kids. It’s usually 2-3 nights a week. My son doesn’t help with anything. If the kids need anything while they’re here, I have to buy it. I’ve bought most of their school clothes. He leaves no cash whatsoever for food. This is a 1 income home. I’m just becoming mentally & physically exhausted. I’ve mentioned to him more than a couple times about finding a part time babysitter. But nothing ever gets done. I was also a single parent when my 2 kids were little. I worked & made sure i always had a sitter for them. I just feel stuck. And I certainly don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings."
RELATED: Am I Really The Bad Guy For ‘Forcing’ My Son To Babysit?
TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"Just sit down and tell him"
"Time for a honest talk"
"Sit him down and have a talk with him."
"Sit down and have an open and honest talk with him."
"Don’t say “blah blah blah BUT…” everything before “but” is bs. Just say I can no longer watch the kids. I’m tired from working so much and then taking care of them. If you need a small amount of help I am here for you. I just can’t do it anymore."
"Be honest and tell him he needs to start providing for his kids. I’m a single mom and my mom watches my kids and I don’t expect her to provide anything for them, I provide everything from food, diapers, car seats and etc. If she has to buy anything, then I pay her back."
"Talk to him and let him know how much stress you have experienced over this issue. Let him know that you still love him and kids, but having them with you so much us difficult…"
"I’m a single mom and found a new job with hours that worked with my kids and babysitter. You’re a grandmother. Not a parent. I would have the talk because you will start getting resentful."
"It sounds like it’s time to have an honest conversation with him. I think you have done a great job being able to help to this point, but it sounds like it is no longer working out for you to watch them and that’s OK as well"
"Be honest. Tell him you love the kids but you are exhausted bc you also work. Tell him that you also can’t afford to keep buying all the things they need. Tell him you can still keep them maybe 1 or 2 nights a week when you’re off work if that’s something you’d like to do but also tell him that if they need things that he needs to either buy those things or leave some money so that you can. Yes they are your grandkids but if you can’t afford to buy what they need then he should do that bc they are his kids and you are keeping them for free. If you work 40+ hours a week you also need time to relax."
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